Ever Changing Eyes

Author's note: First thing's first, this is a one-shot. It takes place around the end of DOD. Just before Ash, leaves too make things right, he stands alone in his room and thinks about how he was and how he wants to change.

Disclaimer/Dedication: I do not own anyone and am making no profit at all from this. Dedicated to everyone who reads it :) and too whoever created the Sacrifice, fan listing for Ash website, if it wasn't for that person I wouldn't have got the info for the eye colours. Thank you! (Mistakes corrected)

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Do you trust a reflection? A reflection is in a mirror, window or even a puddle. It shows the exact replicate of yourself, does everything you do and gives a pretty good image of how you look. But what you see may not exactly be the truth. It may just been a façade hiding something deeper, something completely opposite of what's being shown. When I look in the mirror, right now, I see me, no surprise there, but I see me not as I want to be. I see an aloof, passive teenager staring right back at me with unwelcoming eyes.

They're so blue!

Oh, a green eyed boy!

What beautiful brown eyes, Redfern.

Wait, weren't they grey a second ago?

Wow, they keep changing.

Eyes. They're supposed to be the most expressive feature of one's face. Human's say no matter how much you hide, your eyes will express how you really feel. Will they really? Or does that apply to humans only because nobody sees anything in my eyes. Nobody knows that when they're green it means I'm feeling heartache, not sulking. When they're blue it means I'm innocent, I am not hiding something or being shrewd. Hellebore green, that's what colour it changes when I'm being shrewd. Remember that before you accuse me. Black, everyone always seems to get that one, black means I am feeling dangerous.

Don't mess with him! His eyes are black!

What colour are they now? Now that I look in the mirror, I see no colour for sure. They're unsettled. How can people tell how I feel if they do that? How many times have you looked in the mirror and found that the eyes gazing back at you are blank, as though they were staring at you from a painting? Unsettled. Unsettled. They've never been unsettled before. What does it mean? It means the only thing it could mean. It means Mary-Lynette. I have changed. I love a vermin. Not even my own body seems to concur with the change. But I have to change. Don't I? Yes. I want to change. I need too change.

So. Right now, what do I see? I see an impersonator, a guy lying about who he is. A guy who says he does not believe in soul mates, that he doesn't care. I do believe in soul mates. I do care. James said one day I would care and it would hurt. Damn him. Why'd he have to be right? I can hear that dreaded phrase now.

I told you so.

I blink. A passive image blinks back. Do you believe me now? Do you believe me when I say, mirrors lie. You only see a stranger, not the real person inside. You see something you're definitely not. We deliberately hide from each other. The image is just a fault of our attempts to be what others want us to be. Of what we want people to think because our true selves would disgust them.

As a little kid I learned to keep whatever I was feeling inside. I learned to act how my father expected little boys to act. I learned to think how I people wanted me to think, not how I wanted to think.

Reflections are not reflections. Reflections are deceptions. Deceptions are all around us. All mirrors are broken; we need to stop using our eyes and start using our minds, our... hearts. I like the image that is projected but should people know what I am really like? Or should I keep up this façade? It may not have to hide some day... I can't hide from Mary-Lynette and soon enough I will be comfortable with others knowing what I am like... I need to make up for things first and now is time as any. She'll be proud of me but better yet I'll be proud of myself.

I look in the mirror one last time.

Blue-Violet.

Earnest.

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Please tell me what you think :) Constructive criticism is accepted, nasty flames will be ignored. Hope you enjoyed!