Title: Only When You Dream
Author: Xanderschick AKA Sarah
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Joss owns the park; I'm just playing in the sandpit til my hands get dirty.
Rating: M rated action. Children avert your eyes!
Spoilers: BtVS seasons 1-3
Distribution: Take it; just make sure you let me know when you review (hint, hint!).
Plot: After Graduation Angel didn't leave. He's been visiting Buffy every night since then because he can't bear to be away from her. But now she's moved to college and his nightly visits aren't an option anymore, so after a visit to a local demon/warlock he's found a spell that allows him to enter and manipulate his girls dream to his every will. If only I could do that to David Boreanaz. All I can say is: WOW!
A/N: Yes, I got the whole dream walking idea from AtS S2 but I thought to myself, "Self, wouldn't this be much more fun if it was Buffy instead of the ex-vamp ho?" Answer: "Yup!"
A/N 2: This chapter is mostly Angels POV. The last paragraph is Buffys. I know I said in Chappie 1 that this was gonna be an Angel POV story it's gonna be a Buffy POV story too.
A/N 3: This story is 100 Blondie Bear free so don't even ask. Ever. I mean it.
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Chapter Two - Dream A Little Dream Of Me"Buffy?"
I open my eyes slowly, stunned by the sudden flood of light. My eyes take a moment to adjust and then I panic, realising that I'm in direct sunlight. The worry fades quickly when I remember exactly what's going on. It's all a dream.
I survey my surroundings - a green meadow surrounded by trees, yet they cast very little shadow. The grass, a vivid shade of green is speckled with hundreds of little flowers, all the colours of the rainbow. I look over to the trees and spy a small trail of smoke coming from above them. My still-beating heart jumps in my chest. I know this place. This was my favourite place in the world. When I was a boy, before I was turned, I used to spend hours here with my sister Kathy. We would play chase and pick flowers to bring home to my mother. She would light a fire and when we saw the smoke we knew it was time to go home. I loved this place. That was though, until I discovered my liking for drink and women. Until my mortal life went off the rails. I haven't thought about this place in two hundred and thirty years.
I look down at myself for a moment. My bloody hand is throbbing. I spend a second tightening my bandage before thinking, "If I can manipulate this dream can't I just…" I look back down at my hand and the bandage is gone. I'm fine. I glance around the field again, wondering where you are. I want you here.
Then I see you. You're sitting in the long grass near the back of the meadow. You look stunning. You're wearing a flowing summer dress; white, with flecks of pink and yellow, only visible when the gentle breeze ripples across the surface of the smooth material. You pull your knees up to your chest, your toes grazing against the grass as your feet slowly move closer to you. You're smiling. A warm smile. A happy smile. You haven't noticed me yet; if you have you're showing no sign. Your eyes are just studying the bright afternoon sky. I can't believe how beautiful you look with the daylight shining down on your face, the sunbeams dancing through your wavy golden hair. I can't help but grin as I walk unhurriedly towards you, my bare feet being tickled by the grass. Then you see me. I watch as you stand, gazing at me. As I reach you, you open your arms to me and I walk into your embrace, your small arms wrapping round my neck. We hold each other tightly "You came?" The words roll off your lips, a question that needs no answer. "I'm here. I'm gonna be here all night."
You let go of me after a while and take hold of my hands. "I'm glad. You keep the monsters away." Staring into my eyes your smile fades. "Just for tonight?" you ask, disappointment sounding in your voice. "Every night. I'm yours. Forever." The smile reappears.
"Forever. That's the whole point."
You let go of my left hand and pull my right a little, a gesture telling me that you want to walk with me. "You look pretty good in sunlight," you state, never taking your eyes off me as we stroll across the pasture. "A little pale though." That last part comes out a laugh and you hug my arm when I fake a pout.
"Where are we?" you ask me curiously, the setting being unfamiliar to you.
"Galway. My home when I was alive"
"You always said you'd bring me to Ireland one day." I quietly muse over what you just said, a little sad to know that this is only a dream. But then again, in dreams we can do whatever we want. Fulfil ever promise. Live out any fantasy. The enormity of what we could do hit me like a truck, stopping me in my tracks, my head spinning with possibilities. "Angel? Are you ok?" I glance down at you, only to find you staring intently at me, worry flashing across your eyes. "I was just thinking…" I pause to choose the correct words "…we should go to Disneyland tomorrow."
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We talk for hours. I tell you stories of my childhood, the games Kathy and I used to play in this very field. You listen attentively to my every word, interrupting now and again to ask a question or tell me a story about some of the similar things that you did as a child. Our lives finally relating in ways that didn't involve death, demons or darkness. We lie together, holding each other under the smouldering sun as I tell you about my parents; my father, always fair but never loving, and my mother, her gentle nature and constant patience with her troublesome son. "It must have really hurt her when you died" you prop yourself up using your right elbow, your brows furrowed as you gaze into my eyes. "Not as much as I hurt her when I died" I state quietly, looking away from you. I'm ashamed of what I did.
You reach over and touch my face turning my head back round to look at you. "That wasn't you. It's not your fault that your body has two separate beings living inside it. You're not Angelus. Trust me, I know. You're Angel."
"I was Angelus first."
"No, you were… uh… you had the soul first. You were Angel minus the guilt coupons. And, just out of curiosity, did Angel minus guilt have a name? Two and a half years and I've never picked up on your real name." I smirk at you, grateful for the subject change. "Liam" I tell you. You look upwards and your mouth scrunches up a little at the edges, as if you're considering whether or not it's the right answer. "Liam," you repeat my name slowly. "It's a bit scruffy, isn't it?" You smile at me mischievously, looking for a fight. When my only response is a small chuckle you try again. "Liam what?"
"O'Carroll" I tell you, and quickly regret it when you put on the worst Irish accent I've heard in my unnaturally long life: "Top o' the morning to ya, Liam O'Carroll! How's Saint Paddy?" I grab you playfully and begin to tickle your sides. As you double up with laughter I can't help myself as I fall into hysterics. "That was the worst accent I've ever heard!" you continue to giggle. "I'm Buffy O'Carroll! Let's drink Guinness!" I stop laughing immediately and stare at you. Buffy O'Carroll? That would have been your name if we… Your laughing slows as you notice my seriousness. "What?" you enquire breathlessly. I bend over and kiss you softly. When I move back I see you smiling slightly. As I go to kiss you again you reaches up your hand and push me away. Puzzled, I look at you sheepishly. You're wearing a wicked grin. "You're gonna have to work for this one!"
I watch as you get up and take off, running across the meadow as fast as your slayer speed can carry you, your dress waving in the wind. When you reach the other side you turn round and signal me to come get you. I get up quickly and launch myself at you, sprinting as speedily as I can, desperate for another kiss. As I near you, you dart in the other direction. The game is on! You head towards the edge of the field and hide behind a large elm tree. I slow myself and creep around the side of the tree, but before I have time to grab you, you jump out, run into the middle of the grass and stop, linking your hands behind your back and smiling sweetly. The 'I'm innocent' guise. I jog towards you again, waiting for you to move but you stand still. When I get to you, you lean in and kiss me gently.
"Got tired of running."
I envelop my arms around you and enclose your lips in a sweet embrace. You respond eagerly, running your hands through my hair, our tongues stroking tenderly. We break apart, our foreheads leaning against each other, and I hear you whisper "Make love to me."
I move my hands down and lift your dress up until the hem reaches your waist. You raise your arms and I lift it over your head, dropping it to the ground. We begin to kiss again, your hands unbuttoning my black silk shirt as I caress your now naked body. You escape from my kiss to bow down and lick my bare chest. I unbuckle my belt and you push my pants down. I step out of them and we sink to the ground, all thoughts of our recent playfulness pushed aside to allow room for a desire that has lingered between us for as long as we've known each other. Passion builds until all I can see is you. All I can feel is the smoothness of your hands running across me, your skin warm and wet against mine. All I can hear is your breath; sighing, moaning, murmuring my name in rhythm with your pounding heartbeat. All I can smell is that familiar strawberry scent that you carry mixed with the aroma of the wildflowers surrounding us. I could feel myself flying. My one hope of perfect happiness came to me. My dreams came true as we made love under the burning sun in the cherished home of all my childhood dreams.
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The sun was setting on us as we lay amongst the flowers, naked, our bodies entwined. "I love you." You declare those three words that make me want to be a better person. "I love you. Words could never express how much." I reply. "You don't need words. You definitely just showed me how much you love me" you tell me lazily, humour in your voice. I smile to myself and place a delicate kiss on your head. "Wanna show me again?" you ask seductively as you begin to stroke your hand across my stomach. "I' d be happy to." I take hold of your chin and tilt your head up to me. Just as I'm about to begin a voice breaks our reverie.
"Liam! Liam! It's time to go! Mother's calling for us, can't you see!" I look up and my heart swells as I see my Kathy standing at the edge of the clearing, an urgent look on her young face. "I'll just be a minute. You go on ahead," I call back to her, never taking my eyes off her as she scampers off in the direction of the smoke signalling from the top of the trees. "She's beautiful" I gaze towards you and see you watching my little sister retreat in the other direction. "Did we just scar her for life. Y'know, with her brother and the nudity?" She looks at me quickly, anxiously. I'm touched by her concern. "I don't think we need to worry about that." I speak quietly, sadness taking me over. I think about my sister and her brief life, but my heartache is mostly because it's time for us to part for another day. "I have to go now." I watch as you react to this, a little hurt. "You'll be back?" The tone of your voice is hopeful yet questioning as I get up and pull on my pants. "Next time the sun sets." I finish getting dressed and drop to my knees. You lean up to meet me and our lips brush, electricity passing between them. I stand back up and walk in the direction that my Kathy went. Just before I reach the trees I turn round and see you staring at me, a satisfied smile on your face.
"Buffy?" I call to you.
"Yeah"
"Have an early night tomorrow"
As I walk away I hear the sweet sounds of your laughter like music to my dead ears.
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My whole body takes a moment to awaken. I stretch as far as I can before opening my eyes, still overcome by that warm contented feeling that I had laying in your arms. The sight of my ceiling is an unwelcome reminder of the real world. Back to my unlife. Actually, no. Now I have daydreams to work on. Our nights together have so much potential. I have plans to make for our next date. I can't wait til sundown.
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I feel myself stirring but I still try to sink back into sleep. That was one heck of a dream! It felt so real. My body feels like he's still here with me. Uh, it's no use. Ok, I'm awake. Gotta get up. Have to go to class. The dream still flows around my head and takes up all my thoughts as I stretch out. I sit up slowly and rub my eyes a little before opening them. Looking round to see if Willow's up yet I find her staring at me, annoyed, but with a knowing smirk playing across her lips.
"Do you always make that noise when you sleep?"
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That's it: Chapter 3! This took me ages! Thanks to the gorgeous peeps that reviewed the last couple of chapters but if the rest of you guys wanna see some more quickly I'm gonna need a few more reviews! Reviews encourage me to concentrate harder and type faster! Next chapter is Buffy POV.
PS Look out for my Buffy/Joyce "An Honest Conversation" series, starting in the next couple of weeks. Set during the summer between BtVS Seasons 4 and 5, Buffy and her mom bond and talk love, sex, relationships and friendships (I have a love of the Buffy-Joyce chitchat!).
Thanks for reading! X