Title: Only When You Dream

Author: Xanderschick AKA Sarah

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Joss owns the park; I'm just playing in the sandpit til my hands get dirty.

Rating: M rated action. Children avert your eyes!

Spoilers: BtVS seasons 1-3

Distribution: Take it; just make sure you let me know when you review (hint, hint!).

Plot: After Graduation Angel didn't leave. He's been visiting Buffy every night since then because he can't bear to be away from her. But now she's moved to college and his nightly visits aren't an option anymore, so after a visit to a local demon/warlock he's found a spell that allows him to enter and manipulate his girls dream to his every will. If only I could do that to David Boreanaz. All I can say is: WOW! Anyways, they've been dream 'getting it on' and after a snap decision to get married Angel finally let Buffy in to the little secret that he's still in SunnyD. What is she going to do?

A/N: Yes, I got the whole dream walking idea from AtS S2 but I thought to myself, "Self, wouldn't this be much more fun if it was Buffy instead of the ex-vamp ho?" Answer: "Yup!"

A/N 2: This chapter is a joint Buffy and Angel POV.

A/N 3: This story is 100 Blondie Bear free so don't even ask. Ever. I mean it.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter Seven - If It's Good Enough For Romeo… Angel…

I'm lying awake on my bed later that night. She definitely saw me. She wouldn't just leave it that. A look. She'll come to me. She knows where I am. She can sense me just like I can sense her. She's on her way now. I can feel her getting closer to me. My wife. My life. My everything.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Buffy…

Is he really here? Maybe it was just my imagination. After what happened between us last night I haven't stopped thinking about him for a single second. We got married. Does it count though? I mean, we were dreaming. But I remember it so vividly. The smell of the flowers that surrounded us. The colours that the deep sunset cast on his strong handsome face. The soft tone of his voice as he promised that I'll be his everything from now until eternity. The sweet caress of his lips against mine as we sealed our vows. The taste of his warm skin as we made love so devotedly that I thought I was going to be caught in that moment forever.

Forever. That's the whole point.

He said that to me once, in a dream long before the blissful nights we share now. I finally accept that he meant it. We're forever. That thought sends a surge through my body and my feet move faster along the dark cobbled street. I need to know if it was really him I saw today. I'm going to his old apartment, the one near the Bronze. I don't know why. It's like he's calling to me. What do I do when I get there? Will he even be there? Maybe it's me. He probably doesn't have anything to do with the dreams. I've simply got so lonely and desperate that I've created some elaborate fantasy that he's as out of his mind about me as I am about him.

God, I'm such a loser.

But what if it is him? What do I say? Hey, lovin all the dream sex p.s. do you really wanna be married to me? If it is him I…I don't know.

I reach the apartment block and head downstairs towards the mid-underground flat.

Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god. I can sense him - an intense tingling at the base of my spine. My feet are rooted to the spot but I reach for the door handle and turn it, my whole body shaking…

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Angel…

"Hi"

"Hi" she stares at me, the shock clear on her face. "You're really here."

"I am," I assure her. "I never even left"

She continues to watch me, her eyes searching deep into mine. "But I thought…I thought you didn't wanna be with me?" her voice is quiet and unsteady.

"I didn't wanna be the ruin of you. But I'm not as strong as I thought I could be. That's why I've been visiting you." I respond softly. She keeps on staring silently. I get up and slowly walk to her. "Are you ok?" I question her. She's never been this quiet with me. It's worrying.

"It was you?" she asks faintly. Before I can answer she speaks again, a little louder. "It was you. All along it really was you. It was real." This was more of a statement than a question.

"Yeah. It was me. I just…I couldn't…"

Before I have time to finish she grabs me by the hair and pulls me into a fiery kiss, her mouth crushing against mine. Heat engulfs my body and I react just as vigorously, my hands frantically searching her body. She thrusts her tongue into my mouth and I suck on it eagerly, desperate to have the taste of her take me over again. Her hands hastily make their way to my chest and she pushes me away from her, turning her back to me. She rushes over to the wall and lays her palms flat against it her head hangs down between her arms and I can hear her breathing heavily. She's crying.

"Buffy, what's wrong?" I hurry to her and wrap my arms around her, kissing the back of her neck.

"Don't!" she shoves me away again and returns to her position.

"Don't what?" I can feel the tears form behind my eyes. I hurt her. She's crying because of me! Why do I always do this! I promised myself she'd be alright! No matter what she'd be happy! I should never have gone there today.

"Just don't! Stop…tormenting me! You get inside my head and you…you plant these dreams…" she turns to face me and I see the warm tears, waterfalls cascading down both her cheeks. "And you make me feel…but it's not…I actually thought we had a chance. I was so happy." She sobs loudly, her body trembling with every drop that runs down her glowing face.

I go to her and she wraps her arms around my waist, weeping into my shirt. "I know. I was happy too." I run my fingers through her smooth hair as I try to explain myself "For once I felt…like we could have it all. Then I realised that we were fooling ourselves but then you wanted to get married and I couldn't believe my luck. I wanted you so badly I couldn't stop myself." Her grip on me gets tighter and I can feel the dampness of her tears against my chest.

"I love you." It's all I have to offer.

I don't hear her say it but I feel her breath it against me.

"I love you too."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"So what happens now?"

She stopped crying a few minutes ago and I've settled her onto the edge of my bed. I'm sitting on a chair barely millimetres from her, massaging her hands to help calm her down.

"What do you want?" I gaze at her, waiting patiently for her request.

"You."

A sadness echoes in her voice and she looks away from me. "But that's just not gonna happen is it?" I carry on gazing at her. "Sorry, rhetorical question. Needs no answer." She laughs a little at her own joke but I see the pain in her beautiful blue eyes. So much sorrow for someone who has never deserved it. I want to make that vanish. I want her to smile every moment of every day. She has such a stunning smile. I need to tell her. I need to tell her now. Then she'll never hurt again.

"Actually…" I stop rubbing her hands and glimpse down at the floor.

"What…" she enquires, curiosity flickering across her tear-stained face.

"There is one way…" she stares intently at me, waiting for me to go on. I reach over to my nightstand and pick up an old leather journal and hand it to her. "The spell I used is on page two-thirty." She looks to the book and flips through the pages until she finds the incantation. I give her a moment to read it. "There's another spell on page one-forty three. I thought about using it but I would never…not without your permission." She turns the pages back and I watch her eyes move back and forward as she examines the words in front of her.

"The Eternal Rest. I…I don't understand." She looks to me questioningly.

"It's a sleeping spell. It puts the person under the spell into a deep sleep. They can't be woken up by anything."

"How long does it last?" I pause for a moment, trying to gauge her reaction to what I'm about to say.

"Forever. That's the whole point."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Buffy…

Why does he keep saying that?

He's gone crazy. He's finally snapped. His fruit's finally looped.

"Forever? How is that even possible? I mean, if I'm sleeping for more than ten hours I wake up starving. My body'll die after a few days." I get up of his bed. The bed I lost my virginity in. The sheets are still the same colour. It was so…uh, snap out of it Summers, focus on the now.

"No, that's not how it works." He grabs my hips and sits me back down again. "We just go to sleep. Permanently. We don't ever die. We can't die. We live together forever, doing whatever we want whenever we want. It'll be fantastic! Just you and me. Walking in the sunshine. The dream come true." I can hear the hope in his voice as he stares at me.

Is this for real? Could this really happen? Me and Angel. Together forever. This has to be the most tempting proposition I've ever had.

"But what about my friends? My mom? I can't just leave them. Can I?"

"That's your decision. I won't force you into this." he gazes at me calmly. I see the love reflecting in his eyes and I feel my entire body burn. I can't seriously be considering this, can I?

"What would we do forever?" I can't help but ask, wondering what his plans are.

"We could have a family. Think about it. Us and a big brood of kids. Our kids. And they can grow up whenever we want and have their own families. Then it's us and a big brood of grandkids. And we could, I dunno, make our own house. I always wanted to do that!" he grins at me and I throw in a few ideas of my own.

"We could get horses! I really enjoyed it when we went riding in Texas. And you could teach me and the kids to speak different languages! And we could laze about all day coz we'd never have to worry about work or money." I'm sitting up straight now, smiling like a fool, grasping his hands tightly.

"Yeah, we could do all of that! And more. Anything and everything you can think of."

"It'll be perfect!" Oh my god, I think I'm gushing. Buffy Summers doesn't gush! Much…

"It will." He's smiling back at me, squeezing my hands as tightly as I'm holding his.

This is insane. I can't do this. I can't abandon my family and friends and calling. Hold on. The slaying.

"What about the slaying? What happens there?" he notices my face fall and quickly tries to reassure me. "No more. No more demons, no more fighting, no more pain. It'll all be over."

Well that's just the icing on a great big chocolate cake.

"This is crazy! Do people actually do this?" I'm laughing now, half in amusement and half in shock at the mere inclination I'm having to this idea.

"People madly in love do this all the time." He laughs back at me and I feel the need to question his answer.

"Oh yeah, like who?"

"Romeo and Juliet! True story. That wasn't poison in that bottle, it was the Endless Rest potion," he informs me, a slight smugness in his tone.

"And how would you know that?" I shoot back.

"Romeo! A demon I once knew met the poor guy in a witch's den looking for something that would keep him and his lover together forever. Always knew he'd found something but I never knew quite what it was until today. He and Juliet will still be together now." his laughter ceases and his mouth forms that patented half-smile that makes my knees go weak.

"Buffy, I've already made my decision. Now this is about you. Whatever you decide is fine by me. I'll love you anyway."

I know what I want. But I have one last question.

"If I say no to this…what happens with us?" I speak softly; scared of the answer but knowing it will make my decision for me.

"Whatever you want. I'm never leaving you again. I'm with you for as long as you want me. I'm crazy about you."

He said that last night when he proposed. I…this is wild.

"I, uh…I need some time to think about this," I tell him, already quite sure what my answers gonna be.

"I understand." He states selflessly. "It'll all be worth it though. I promise you. I'll never let you down"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Angel…

I stand up with her as she prepares to leave me. I reach over to her and graze my lips against hers, unsure if she wants me to touch her right now. She leans in and kisses me tenderly, an innocent kiss that promises so much more. As she walks away from me, the door her destination, I just have to ask.

"Are we still on for tonight?"

She turns around and smirks at me.

"Don't be late."

We stand still, smiling at each other for a moment before she walks out, leaving me with my deep thoughts.

Should our new house have a pool?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hello my brilliant reviewers! Thanks for all your reviews last chapter! They made me feel all warm and fuzzy! 18 reviews altogether last time I checked! Not bad for a first fic!

I'm gonna admit that I had this fic going in a completely different direction but I watched "The Prom" a few days ago and realized that I didn't actually like my plan. Too much angstorama! Anyways, the new plan has six more chapters than the old one so I'm not even half way through this yet - more work for me, more fic for you! And mysticallove, feel glad that you don't live in crappy Scotland - "Bones" hasn't started here yet. Now I'm all excited about it coz DB takes his shirt off! I'll be recording that and playing it over and over and over and over and over…!

Chapters eight and nine should be up in two days, three if I get dragged to another party this weekend!

Thanks for reading! X