So sue me if it strays a bit from canon. I'd been listening to the OVA soundtrack and just wrote without thinking, then thought to check the manga for accuracy afterwards. -headdesk- No, I'm not very smart.

Anyway. Sorry this is kind of dark, off-canon, and pretty lame. -swtz- Comments still are appreciated, though!

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin and all affiliated characters and settings are the creative property of Watsuki Nobuhiro.

Ever Onward
Rurouni Kenshin
by D. Reed

Day one.

Too injured to move, but I do anyway. I have to see – touch – her one last time before… before… while I still can. It hurts so much, like something important was ripped out from inside me during that fight. I suppose that is what happened. But I was the one who inflicted that wound upon myself.

Oh gods, I'm so sorry. It's all… all my fault. I only hope you can forgive me long enough to find a way to make it up to you. I would do anything to see your smile again. It's so cold tonight.

Day five.

I nearly lost track of time in my delirium. The fever's gone now.

My wounds seem to have closed properly. Even the old one from so long ago – that marring reminder of my crimes – that one is finally on the way to healing.

Despite the physical reassurance, I can't help but feel far from recovered. I can't help but feel that the bloody nightmares I experienced in my fever dreams won't go away.

I read your journal today. If I had realized… I… I wish…

Please give Kiyosato my regards… and my sincerest regrets, for what they're worth.

Day seven.

Katsura-sama came by today. I know I apologize much of late, but I'm sorry once again – I will have to wait to keep my promise until the violence ends, or all those deaths I'm responsible for will be in vain.

The traitor has been taken care of, I was told. But that doesn't help ease the nagging feeling of guilt in my chest. Or perhaps that feeling comes from my wounds' aching.

Today will be the last day I play with the children. Tomorrow, I return to Kyoto with Katsura-sama… and… with your remains. I will take up my sword one last time, and keep my eyes on the road ahead.

I swear that I will keep my vow. Even if it costs me my life, once this war is over, I will abandon my katana and never ever kill again. Someday, I will wait for your smile.

350 words.