Chapter 3 – White-Haired Morons! The Last Bit of Sanity Men Have!

"Hidey-hole?" coughed Neji, as the dog bounded around chasing mosquitoes. "Now I regret stuffing myself on sushi before missions…"

Naruto shook his head and laughed. "I don't get what's the big deal. The important thing is…BOOBIES, dattebayo!" He began to pick up the scattered Naughty Ninja pages off the ground as two serious-looking white-haired ninja appeared.

"Oh, thank God you're here Kakashi-sensei," said Sakura, relieved.

"Sorry, folks…today I got lost on the path of OHMYGODGIVE METHAT-"

Kakashi viciously grabbed what was left of the magazine out of Naruto's reach, and stared it down dreamily.

"And there goes the last bit of sanity men have," croaked Sakura helplessly, shaking her head.

"Now Sakura," Kakashi replied, without even looking at her. "You know I'm going to confiscate these inappropriate materials right away…these…very…very inappropriate pictures…of…hot…hot young…girls…"

The white-haired man behind him knocked the crowd over like bowling pins.

"Did someone say HOT YOUNG GIRLS! Only the master of super perverts, Jiraiya the Horny, can handle such a delicate situation with such care!" He proceeded to do a funky dance, somehow accompanied by unexplained Chinese opera music.

DONG-DONG-DONG-DONG-DONG!

"Where's that music coming from?" asked Kiba. "And is it just me, or does that girl in that pic right there look like that kunoichi with the fan, whatshername…"

"Hmm." Lee looked it over carefully…and sweatily. "K-kind of d-does…but why is she asleep, and the place is so dark? I almost can't see her-"

"Who CARES, dattebayo! She's NEKID!" yelled Naruto happily, high-fiving Jiraiya. Sakura stared at them.

"How can you all be such PERVERTS! Jiraiya-sama, how can you drool over girls FORTY years younger than you?"

Jiraiya eyed her closely and let out a booming laugh. "My my, you have much to learn my delicious - I mean…young Sakura. What a foolish question unbefitting of a Chuunin! If one can do it with frogs, one can certainly do it with teen girls!"

DONG-DONG-DONG-DONG-DONG!

Everyone stood there for what seemed like an eternity. It was Neji who broke the silence.

"I really regret the sushi now."

Next Chapter: Attention Big Fans of Universe! Super Fantastic Mission To Invade Unknown Facility 11 Followed By Incredible Action Inspection of Crazy Number 12 Facility! No One Dies, But Action to Maximum Are You Ready For Supreme Excitement Explosion! Why Japanese Use Long Titles Me Not Know

Kunoichi – Female ninja