For the second time in days, Naruto found himself wandering the barren, sand-swept streets of Sunagakure. Only this time, he had a destination, as well as some Ramen packages in his pants.
"434, 435…436 Sunagakure…this is it!"
He looked up at the colossal structure and whistled. Being Kazekage sure has its rewards, he thought. Naruto began to bang on the door.
"Hey Gaara, what's…hey! You're not Gaara, you're that pervert-"
"What pervert?" asked Kankurou, incensed.
"Uh I mean puppet – puppet…guy. Where's Gaara?"
"In the room to the left…no, not that one!"
Kankurou hastily jumped in Naruto's way.
"T-Two rooms down…wake Gaara up, I think he's sleeping."
"Sleeping? I thought he never slept?"
"Ever since his Shukaku was…violently removed, he's been sleeping 15 hours a day."
"Oh, I see."
Naruto thought he heard some rustling from behind Kankurou's door.
"Hey, what's that racket, Kankurou?" asked a familiar voice from behind the door.
"N-nothing…I'll be right back!"
"Who is that, dattebayo? I've heard that voice before somewhere…"
"Dammit Naruto, two doors down!"
"Sheesh, okay okay…"
----------
When Naruto entered the Kazekage's room, he found Gaara with his face plastered in a couch, muttering various things. Naruto turned him over and waved a hand over his face.
"Hey Gaara, you awake?"
"…zzz…his eyes…they remind me of him…zzz…"
"…huh?"
"…Uchiha…Sasuke…zzz…"
"Uh, Gaara?"
"…I have a big debt to Konoha…"
"Gaara?"
"…eyes that wish to prove their existence…"
Naruto unconsciously grabbed his friend by the throat and shook him vehemently.
"Hey Gaara, snap out of it!"
"Huh? Oh…it's you…what do you want."
"We need to borrow your-"
Gaara raised a hand and sat up.
"Jiraiya-sama and I already talked, and I agreed to lend you and your comrades some uniforms-"
"Excellent, dattebayo! We'll be leaving now-"
"-in exchange for something."
"Oh great…what is this something?"
Gaara sighed.
"…I have to ask you a question, and I want an honest answer."
Naruto began to sweat profusely.
"Look Gaara, if it's about the ramen I stole-"
Gaara shook his head.
"Well," Naruto continued. "I don't find your sister hot anymore...at least not now!"
"I don't care. Truth is, Temari has been up to some weird activites recently…No, that's not it."
"Then what, dattebayo?"
Gaara looked into Naruto's eyes.
"Naruto…can you make me cool?"
"WHAT?"
"Don't make it harder than it already is. If you were a girl, hypothetically, would you find me attractive?"
Naruto's jaw dropped.
"…Honestly Gaara, I don't know how to answer that one."
"Fine, let me rephrase it – am I…interesting?"
"Uh, do you want my honest answer, or my answer that's been forced the way it is because I'm afraid of your death sand?"
"Honest answer," said Gaara .
"Then YEESH!" Naruto groaned. "You're more boring than potatoes, Gaara…and potatoes are pretty boring, dattebayo…wait, you're more boring than Konoha Academy classes! Man, you're SO boring, I'd rather die than-"
A vein began to bulge on Gaara's forehead.
"Uhm…what I mean is…yes, Gaara, you are boring. But hey, that's what Sakura-chan says! Don't kill the messenger!"
Gaara sighed again and looked at the dusty floor.
"Naruto, I need a girlfriend. All of them seem creeped out by me for some reason."
"Hey wait a minute!" Naruto roared. "What's with those fangirls that showed up when you were revived by Chiyo-basama?"
"Those weren't girls, Naruto."
"Uuugggghhhhh…," Naruto shuddered. "And to think I asked oneout-"
"The point is…Naruto, why do girls avoid me?"
"Let's see…what do you like to do in your spare time, Gaara?"
"Wel…I like to sleep for hours. I like to invent new ways to torture people. Murder sprees, thoseI also enjoy…"
"See, there's your problem. Gaara, friend to friend, I really suggest you get a new personality. If girls aren't digging you now, you gotta be the opposite person of who you are now!"
Gaara pondered the words. "Well…it makes sense...Alright, I'll get a new personality, Naruto. But you better be right about this."
Naruto grinned.
"With my philosophy on girls, you'll be hauling in chicks in no time! Remember, just be the opposite of the current Gaara."
"I got it Naruto…you better get some rest though, it's getting late. Sleep on the third floor if you want, we have plenty of room."
Naruto yawned and headed to the stairs.
"Good luck getting a new personality, Gaara!"
"Yeah, I'll see you later Naruto…"
Gaara escorted him out the door and returned to his sleep. Naruto could hear Gaara mutter opposite, be the opposite over and over as he left for his room.
Next Chapter (update coming 11/25): Poor Shikamaru! Temari's Secret Love Interest!
Happy Thanksgiving everyone! XD