A/N- I hope everyone liked that last chapter. Thanks for the reviews. And I believe you meant Alfred, my esteemed colleague. )!

Chapter 5- Plans

The Joker leaned back in his chair. Harley had done a nice job cleaning the hideout. One could now walk through it without wondering what the hell you had stepped in.

The Clown Prince of Crime was staring idly at the picture of his daughter as Harley prepared his dinner. Several things were going through his maniacal brain. It's so strange to think of someone as my kid. She needs some fine tuning, I bet. She's such a nerd. I hope Harley doesn't burn dinner.

He put the picture down onto the table he had his feet propped up on.

"Harley! How's supper going, pooh?" he called into the kitchen.

"A OK, Mistah J!" she called back.

"Is it okay if you leave it for a bit?" he called. Any other time, he would've just told her to come, but she'd been cooking for a while and he really didn't want to eat burned pot roast…again.

"Yes, puddin'?" she asked, bustling out to him.

"Sit down. Let's go over the plan for my little Jo," he said.

For lack of seating and for pure joy, Harley climbed into the Joker's lap.

"Fire away, Mistah J!"

"Alright, here's the deal. We need to get her away from that terrible influence she calls an aunt. Woman sounds like a downright stiff, and I want my girl to have a good sense of humor. So, tomorrow, when she gets out of school, you're going to go up to her and nab her. Simple as that."

"Sounds great, but…what next? What about when we get her here?"

"Once again, I'll wing it. I need to see her and see where she needs the most work. My daughter has to meet my expectations…or else."

Harley opened her mouth to agree with him, but suddenly, the Joker's two latest henchmen barged into the room.

He didn't know their names and didn't care to know. He'd gone through so many that he'd found it best that he didn't get attached. The only henchmen he had ever had that had been any good anyway was named Ed…or maybe Eddy? Possibly Jeremiah.

The Joker stood, dropping Harley to the floor. The Henchmen looked as though they may contain important information within their teeny brains.

"Boss! You'll never believe it!" cried one of them.

"I'll never believe what? Spit it out, you buffoon!"

Henchman Number One handed a newspaper, folded to the back page, to him. He scanned the page until he found the information that was so important.

"What?!" the Joker screeched.

"What is it, puddin'?" Harley asked.

"Someone beat us to the punch," Henchman Number Two said.

"Local girl goes missing. Aunt is convinced of foul play, but police think otherwise," the Joker read. "Joanna Ker, a senior at Gotham High…This has to be the Bat! He must've found out! This isn't fair!"

"Why would the Bat want the girl?" Henchman Number One asked.

"To. Protect. Her. From. Me." the Joker answered, hitting the man with the paper after each word. "Well, this just simply won't do. Harley!"

"Yes, sir?"

"New plan!"

…………………

Batman would've never believed it if, several days ago, someone were to tell him that he'd be dusting an old cave just to make a kid feel at home. Yet, here he was, feather duster in hand, going over the makeshift chairs. Jo was several feet away, going through some crates that had obviously been down here for a while.

"Well, I've found a blanket…and some outdated tuna. This is lovely," Jo said, coming back to Batman.

Batman put down the duster. "I'm sorry that I can't offer you all the comforts of home at the moment. But I figured that you'd rather be a bit cold rather than be dead."

Jo sighed. "Yeah, you're right. Sorry."

Batman nodded and walked off toward the Batmobile.

"Batman?" Jo asked.

"Yes?" he replied, without turning around.

"Where are you going?"

"To get you some food and drink. I am a civil person, after all."

The hint of sarcasm did not go unnoticed by Jo. She smiled slightly at him.

"Could you do me a favor?" Jo asked.

Batman was now in the driver's seat of the Batmobile.

"What is it?"

"My aunt. Catherine. I'll bet she's worried. Is there anyway you can let her know that I'm fine?"

"I'm sorry. We can't risk endangering your aunt with any sort of knowledge as to your whereabouts."

"I understand. I just hope she's all right."

Jo turned and sat down upon one of the chairs.

"Jo…if you need to reach me, I've left a communicator that links directly to the video screen of the Batmobile on the table…and there's a television that gets some of the more basic channels somewhere around here."

Jo nodded. The top of the Batmobile slid shut with a hissing noise. Then, we a great roar of the engine, he was gone.

End Notes: Yes, I am the one that wrote Joker on the Table and Ace in the Hole. Why do you ask? Anywho, sorry that it's taken me so long to post this update. I've been rather obsessed with a Star Wars fic of mine. I'm desperate to get to its sequel. Btw, if any of you are also Star Wars fans, please check my bio and read that fic. I need to know what people think. Anyhow, please R & R! Bye!