A/N: This is just a little one shot song fic I wrote based ont eh song Beautiful disaster by Kelly Clarkson in response to a challenge on please tell me what you think
Disclaimer: yeah so I don't own the characters…nor do I own Kelly Clarksons song…I would however like to own Draco Malfoy…take a moment to think about how sexy he is...mmmmmmm.
Draco Malfoy sat bolt upright in his chair, breathing hard and sweating. He looked down at the watch on his arm to see what time it was, 11:54. "Brilliant" he said to himself. "Bloody dreams. Maybe if I drown again I'll die in real life." Draco slowly gathered his books off the table, he'd been working on a paper and fell asleep from the intense boringness of it. He threw his belongings into his bag and left the, what he thought to be, deserted library.
Soon after Dracos departure Ginny Weasley appeared from behind a shelf of books. She simply watched the empty chair he had been sleeping in moments before, "Draco Malfoy," she said into the emptiness as she sat down in the still warm seat, "So damned and lost in despair, wishing for it to end, yet still an angel to me. Don't you know that?" Ginny closed her eyes, remembering how Draco had been not long ago.
She was never sure how they had become friends, it just happened. She had been in Snape's class, and he had left the room for a moment, leaving Draco (his aid) in charge. The class was supposed to be reading but she'd finished the assignment early and dove into writing a poem. Draco had noticed her writing and demanded that she come to the front and show him the "note." Grudgingly she'd handed it to him and he read it, raising an eyebrow as he went on, "do you have more?" he'd asked, not looking away from the parchment. Ginny was caught off guard, "more poems?" she asked quietly. "yeah." He answered, still staring at the parchment. She thought for a moment then told him yes at which point he requested that she meet him in the library after dinner with all her poetry. She did, and found that Draco too wrote poetry. Somehow they bonded this way, sharing what the other had written. So much of what Draco wrote was dark aimed towards his father who had been so abusive to him and his mother, Ginny would cry so hard while reading, he had to take them away from her some times. They didn't always meet for poetry though, they found mass amounts of amusement walking around the school and watching peoples faces at the site of the two not only speaking to eachother in civil tongues, but laughing together. They understood each other and were close to an alarming extent, at least until the morning Draco was called to Dumbledores office.
He was called from Snape's class and didn't come back. He wasn't at lunch, or dinner that night. Worried, Ginny made her way to his dormitory and found herself standing in complete darkness. The silence was deafening, broken only by what sounded like muffled crying. She whispered a spell to light a few candles, and there on his black sheets was Draco Malfoy, curled into a ball against the headboard of his bed, hands and head on his knees, crying. She rushed to him, not knowing what to do but holding him anyway. He said nothing, but he really didn't need to. In the candle light she could see shredded paper all over the floor of his room, it was the letter his father sent him telling him he was to become a Death Eater. Draco had told her it would happen but he had been sure it wouldn't until he was out of school.
As she gazed over his terrorized room, willing herself not to cry as well Draco spoke, but she couldn't hear him. He was talking into his knees, "Draco, look at me." He did, and she almost wished he hadn't. His eyes were blood shot, his hair was sticking to his forehead from sweat, and his face was bright red and covered in fresh tears. She lost whatever control she may have had at that point, "Draco, you…you knew this was going to happen. You can fight it…" She had meant to say more but couldn't, he stopped her with what he'd tried to say earlier, "she's dead." A fresh wave of tears flooded his eyes and he buried his head into his knees again. "What…who?" She asked, pulling his head back up. He looked at her, not able to say it, "He killed her Gin, That bastard killed my mother." Ginny gasped, not knowing what to even begin to think about saying to him. "He sent his bloody letter too," he said, his tears stopping as anger filled his eyes. "It was on my bed this morning, and I told him to fuck himself, that I'd rather die than become part of it. Then Dumbledore called me to his office, said my mother had been murdered. They say no one knows who did it, bull shit, Lucius did it, and I'll kill him for it. He did this to show me whose boss, he'll take everyone whose close to me…" he stopped and eyed Ginny for a moment, "get out. I no longer have a connection to you." He told her, looking as though he felt nothing. "Draco, you're strong I know it…you can get through it…" She didn't know what else to say. "Just get out Weasley, you've been nothing but an annoyance to me all this time." Ginny watched him rage about his room with fire in his eyes, "But Draco…" She attempted to plead with him, "I said get the fuck out!" he screamed as he shoved her against a wall, "You are nothing but dirt Weasley, I don't want you to make so much as eye contact with me. Now get out of here before I make you wish you'd never been born." He let go of her and thrust the door open. She left, not looking back.
It was now several months later, the end of the year. She had stayed true to his wishes and hadn't made so much as a glance in his direction when he could have seen it. She restricted herself to watching him from afar as she had just done in the library. "Draco, why can't you let me save you? Do you think if I'm there beside you something will happen? Do you think your miserable excuse for a human being father will take me too? What are you after? What do you want? Do you want to die alone, with no one to say they'll miss you, no one to say they love you? You push me off but I still say that, you're just too damaged to see it."
She buried her head into her arms, crying. They had been friends for what felt like an eternity, but truly it was only a few months, since the end of her fifth year, his sixth. "You're so much work, and I don't even talk to you. Do you think I faded away from you? You know me better, I'll always be here, I'll always watch you and when the time comes for you to get back at Lucius, I'll help because as broken as you are, you're still beautiful, and I will not have you be a beautiful disaster. I love you Draco Malfoy, and you can hate me all you want but that fact will never change." There was a ringing in her head now, loud and maddening, but through it she heard someone cough. For a moment she felt stupid, knowing she had been talking to herself in a very out loud fashion confessing her love for Draco Malfoy of all people.
She pulled her arms out from under her head and whipped her eyes, then looked to see whomever it was that would be most likely holding back laughter. But no one was laughing, no one was there to begin with. She sighed in relief, not wanting this secret to get out. "One day Draco, one day you'll know whats waiting for you," she said, picking up her bag and leaving the empty library. She made her way down the hall but realized her wand was no longer in her pocket, nor was it in her bag, she turned around and headed back to the library, cursing her stupidity.
She walked back inside passing the table she'd been at knowing it was'nt there. She made her way to the book shelf she'd been hiding behind earlier to find it occupied. There stood Draco Malfoy, leaning against the shelf and twirling her wand between his elegant fingers. They stood there, staring at one another in the eyes for what felt like hours. Draco had attempted an emotionless look but failed, his eyes deceived him. When she had met him his eyes had been a dark shade of blue. The day his mother was killed they had turned grey and dull and had been that way ever since. But now, now they were the brightest of blue that they had ever been. She smiled at him and his previously impassive face dissolved as he started bighting his lips, "did you mean all that?" He asked. Ginny looked away and slowly nodded, fighting back tears, afraid he may lash out again though his eyes told her he wouldn't. His fingers were on her chin, pulling her face towards him, "look at me," he told her like she had once done to him, "Gin, I love you too, but I don't want Lucius to take you like he did my mother." Ginny watched him for a moment, "I can't say that he wont Draco, but it's a chance I'm willing to take, he's broken you so many times and I want to save you." He looked down at her, "There's nothing I can do to make you change your mind?" She shook her head. "Your still stubborn I see." He said, trying to lighten the mood like he'd always done before. She laughed lightly, "of course." She looked back at him in time to see his head tilt down to meet her lips. "Of course. Don't ever change." He told her as he bent back down to finish what he'd started.