A/N: Thanks to P.A. for your questions about the last chapter which prompted me to realize an entire section had been dropped. Hello to midnite, shall-iin, Pookie and my sissstttaaahhhh and thanx for reading and review my story. Keep the insight coming guys and gals cause it helps to keep me on track with a big story like this.

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January 2nd

Castle Wyvern

Manhattan

Early afternoon

Elisa Maza jerked herself awake from the horrific nightmares, her breath coming in harsh sobbing pants, as she blindly fumbled with the sheets that were twisted around her body once again. Several minutes later she was unwrapped enough from the sheet so that she could carefully sit up and grope around for the glass of water next to her bed. Her hand knocked the glass over and in a fit of frustration and anger she grabbed the glass up and hurled it across the room, listening with a small sense of satisfaction as it shattered into a thousand tiny pieces against the stone wall.

That, of course, brought Annabelle rushing in moments later. "Elisa? Is everything alright?" she asked concerned.

"Everything's just peachy," Elisa muttered sullenly.

"What happened? I thought I heard glass breaking?"

"I had dispute with my water glass."

"Oh." There was silence and then Elisa heard the nurse moving over to clean up the broken glass. "Elisa you should be more careful, you don't want to strain yourself or it might slow your healing process."

"What's slowing my healing process are these damn nightmares and not being able to see!" Elisa shouted angrily. "Everyone keeps telling me to rest, but I all I can do is watch every miserable moment in my life replay itself in the darkness that your confining me too. I'm not glass damnit! I need to get back on my feet. I need to be able to see again!"

Annabelle sighed patiently as she continued cleaning up the fragments. This wasn't the first outburst from Elisa. "Elisa, your injured eye needs to heal-"

"What needs to heal! I'm already blind in that eye so what more can I possibly do to it? Goliath's funeral is in three days, and you guys are telling me I can't even take the bandages off for that!" Elisa ranted. Blood was beginning to pound through her veins, elevating her blood pressure, and the throbbing in her head began to increase ten-fold. "Is there something you guys aren't telling me? Am I blind in both eyes? Or was the damage to my face worse than you're saying?" she asked, a small vice of fear tightening across her chest.

"Elisa your right eye was unaffected by the injuries to the left side of your face," Annabelle assured as she dumped the glass into the trash and moved to sit on the plush bed Elisa was now resting in. "You've just suffered several devastating losses sweetie. Your injuries are severe Elisa, but they will heal up nicely with a little more time. Part of the reason the doc wanted to keep your eyes bandaged is so that the swelling and bruising has a chance to lessen."

"When?" Elisa demanded.

"The doc says by next week it should be okay."

Elisa's jaw tightened. "Whatever."

Annabelle looked sadly at the injured detective. Years of experience helped her to see the root of Elisa's angry outbursts at nearly everyone that dared to enter her room. The others knew it as well, but it was getting harder and harder for them to cope with her bitterness in the face of their own losses. The only one that seemed to break through Elisa's self-loathing was Angela, and Annabelle was thankful that the girl made it a point of visiting the detective every night for at least a couple of hours.

Elisa had been silent for a couple of minutes, so Annabelle stood. "I'll fetch you another glass of water and will be just down the hall if you need anything."

"I'm not made of glass," Elisa ground out again.

"No, but you are flesh and blood just like the rest of us," Annabelle reminded her as she moved out of the room. Two minutes later she came back in and set a fresh water glass on the table next to Elisa's bed, knowing the detective would resent it if she placed it in her hands. "It's nearing sunset, shall I send Ms. Angela in once she awakens?"

The detective had gone from tense anger to hopeless defeat in the small time Annabelle had been gone. While the grieving process entailed a wide range of mood swings, the rapid succession, and severity Elisa displayed was a cause for alarm to the medical staff. After much discussion with the Clan and her family, it had been revealed that Elisa had been emotionally worn thin over the last couple of years, and this blow could quite possibly be the breaking point for her if they were not careful.

"I don't want any visitors tonight," she answered dismally.

Annabelle didn't push the issue, knowing the only thing that she'd accomplish would be raising detective's anger once more. So she merely sighed, and left the room, intent on making sure Angela did visit Elisa tonight, but with fair warning of what to expect.

Later that evening…..

Angela stood before the door to Elisa's room and reached out hesitantly for the door handle before she withdrew her shaking talon. Closing her eyes, she sank against the wall next to her door and wrapped her wings around herself as she tried to sort through her own boiling emotions. She was slowly coming to grips with the death of her father, and she silently thanked Brooklyn once more for the personal sacrifice she knew he was making by allowing her mother free access to the castle.

But her mother had been somewhat distant the past week, and Angela had not been able to decipher what was troubling her so much. The Clan had all been rather quiet lately, as preparations for her father's funeral continued. But it was something more than that and whenever she tried to ask, her mother would firmly tell her to let it go or that nothing was wrong. Her visits to the castle had become increasingly more brief than the ones during that first week, and Angela had noticed an agitated restlessness in her mother that she had never seen before. Almost as if she was feeling trapped within the castle walls.

Now her best friend, and the woman that she had come to love almost as much as her own parents, was withdrawing more and more from everyone, as she struggled to fight the personal hell she was suffering through. Annabelle had come to her earlier this evening and had spoken to her at length about the medical staff's concerns about Elisa's mental deterioration. Angela was surprised when the kind nurse told her that she was most likely the only one who could get through to Elisa in her current condition.

Now Angela was sitting outside her room, wondering how she all of all people could help. But Elisa had been there for her three years ago, after her mother's betrayal. She alone had told Angela to never give up hope that perhaps someday Demona would come around…that everyone could change if they had the right reasons. Elisa even had the courage to angrily stand up to the rest of the Clan and tell them to back off when their verbal bashing of her mother had driven Angela to tears one night. And she had kept Angela's secret- even covered for her- after she had found out that Angela had been visiting her mother a couple of times a month, because she had begun to see the change in her mother.

Standing, Angela took a deep breath, resolve finally filling her heart. Elisa had not allowed her to let go or give up, and she had been there encouraging her the whole time. Now she would repay the favor that had given her back her mother.

Steeling herself for whatever verbal assault Elisa would undoubtedly unleash on her for being disturbed when she wished to see no one, Angela was unprepared for what awaited her when she did enter Elisa's room.

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Wayne Manor

New Gotham

When he didn't find Barbara resting in bed, he knew there was only one other place that she would be. Knocking softly on the door to the room Dinah had been given once Leslie felt it was safe to move her, he entered the dark room quietly and found the redhead dozing in her chair next to the sleeping teen. He moved over into a corner of the room, and simply watched the two sleep, his sharp mind taking in so many tiny observations from such a simple act.

Barbara had grown into a beautiful woman- on the inside and out. He had always known she had a good heart, but she had proven to have the heart of a lion. Deep down he had always envied her, even when she was a brash young teen trying to prove herself to him, because she dared to risk it all. She dared to open herself up to others…to feel and to love.

That risk had obviously taken it's toll on her over the years. He could see, even in the dim moonlight as she slumbered, the small weight that seemed to keep her shoulders lowered just a fraction more than they used to be. And, he could also tell from the way she had been avoiding him this past week. She had been hurt one too many times recently.

Scared one too many times as well, judging from the way she'd been hovering so protectively over Dinah since the teen had been brought out of her coma. A soft smile turned up his lips ever so slightly as he watched Barbara unconsciously soothe the girl as she began to grow restless in her sleep. He had never pinned Barbara as the mother type. A good teacher most definitely- with her eidetic memory she paid close attention to even the smallest of details. But she had served as more than just a guardian or mentor to his daughter and now Dinah- she had nurtured and loved both girls as if they had been her own.

She had done a far more admirable job of caring for them, than he had for Dick. Helena had been better off with Barbara, of that he was certain. And perhaps that was one reason why he had not regretted leaving. His daughter had grown into so much more than he could have ever expected or hoped for. There was so much potential in that sharp mind and strong body, that even she could not see yet. But Barbara had seen it- and she still saw it.

He owed so much to her. And yet, of those closest to him affected by his disappearance, she had been hurt worst of all. Helena and Dick were pissed, but Barbara…. His eyes drifted over the chair, and he closed his eyes against the image. She had been struck down in the prime of her life- a life he had helped to shape- and he hadn't been there to help her pick up the pieces.

"I know you're hovering in the dark over there Bruce," Barbara said quietly without opening her eyes, her voice slightly rough from sleep.

He arched an eyebrow and she smirked. "Hel lurks in the dark all the time. I've become attuned to the feeling of being watched, even when I can't see anything."

"How's Dinah?" he asked quietly, not bothering to move from the darkness just yet.

Sleepy eyes finally opened and squinted over at him as Barbara shrugged, and then winced as she moved her broken arm. "Improving. She's still suffering from some pretty wicked migraines, and exhaustion, but Leslie's managed to keep the pain to more tolerable levels. Alfred coaxed her into eating a light sandwich today and she felt better after the solid food."

Bruce nodded. "We're you aware of her potential?" He tried to phrase the question as neutrally as possible, because he knew Barbara was well aware of his past distrust of meta-humans. It was ironic, really, that his own daughter was a meta herself.

There was a soft sigh after a minute - one filled with sadness and regret. "Only just recently. I don't know how much Hel's told you, but Dinah's only been with us for a couple of years, and her powers were just beginning to really strengthen and expand before….before Quinn attacked last year."

There was a great deal of pain behind those words, and he could sense how much it had taken Barbara to force them out. To admit an oversight.

"After the attack. We lost focus, and Dinah began to hone most of her growing powers on her own. It wasn't until she started training with Dick a few weeks ago, that any of us realized just how strong she had been getting…how powerful her gift had become."

"I watched her fight by Helena's side at the dock's the other night. You've done a good job Barbara- with both girls."

She was quiet for a moment, and he watched her stroke Dinah's hair back. "I should have done better," the redhead whispered, castigating herself. "I let things go this past year, and we were just lucky someone wasn't killed. If Dick hadn't been here these past couple of weeks to step up her training-," she broke off the statement unable to finish as s shudder ran through her body.

"He may have taken her to the next level, but the skill and discipline were already there." He stepped forward, coming out of the shadows now, as his blue eyes pierced through the darkness to fix on emerald. "You put those there Barbara. Hel told me about Dinah's past. You took a frightened teenager, who had spent her childhood in an abusive environment, and gave her the confidence to face her destiny head-on."

The redhead looked down at the blonde, tears shimmering in her eyes. "I don't know what I would do if I lost either of them Bruce," she admitted in a bare whisper. "I almost lost them both last week…I almost lost Helena a year ago, and I can't get that fear out of my head."

He rested a hand on her uninjured shoulder, and waited for her to look up at him. "We all have that fear Barbara. Why do you think I was so hard on you and Dick? Why do you think I left?" he asked, his voice even more gravelly than normal.

"Why Bruce?" she asked, the hurt in those green eyes piercing through him. She knew- she was too intelligent to not know. But she needed to hear it from him.

"Because," he said, crouching beside her chair. "I couldn't live with the fact that I had failed you…that I had lost you. Selina had been killed, you had been shot, and it wasn't something I could fix. The nightmare…my nightmare was being repeated all over again. I built my life around preventing this from ever happening again. I spent decades of my life under that mantle, but when it really mattered…when it really counted- I was powerless to stop it."

Barbara's eyes bore into his. There was something more…she could sense it. "I never blamed you Bruce. Not even when I first woke up and found out that I would never walk again. We take risks in this business, and we all accept those risks knowing every night out there might be our last. Or that it might be the last for someone we are fighting beside," she added with quiet regret. She suspected Bruce had never gotten over Jason's death. The suddenly troubled look in her former mentor's eyes confirmed it.

"When I finally found the Joker, I lost control, Barbara," he admitted, so quietly she almost hadn't heard it. But the sharp intake of air confirmed that she had, and he pressed on. "All I could see was the people in my life that he had hurt or killed. All I could think of, was how much he had enjoyed hurting them….of how much he enjoyed hurting me, and for the first time, I almost crossed the line. I beat him so badly, the paramedics almost couldn't revive him. For one split second I wished they couldn't and I had a pure rush of pleasure seeing him like that."

And there it was. Barbara felt like someone had punched her in the gut, because she was unable to draw in a breath for a long time. She had expected his reason for leaving to be remorse over what had happened to her and Selina. Guilt, or some such emotion for not being there to stop the Joker and his men. But not this. She motioned for him to follow her outside the room, knowing she wouldn't be able to keep her emotions in check for much longer.

Bruce followed her back down the hall to her room, which was still thankfully empty, and sat in a chair across from where she parked herself. He hadn't been prepared for the right hook that caught him neatly across the jaw and sent him sprawling to the floor, rather ungracefully. Looking up slightly dazed, he was not surprised to see a fire burning in her eyes that nearly matched her hair.

"All these years I thought it was because you felt bad for what happened to us. That I could have accepted. But this! You left because you almost crossed the line and killed the man that both started and nearly finished your life as Batman? Christ, Helena was right about you! Your so full of yourself, and so above everyone else that you really do think your invulnerable. Well welcome to the real world Bruce- we're all human and we all have our moments when we actually enjoy hurting the people that have hurt us for so long."

Bruce rose to his feet, anger flashing in his eyes. "Did you not hear what I just said back there? I will never forgive myself for what he did to you…for what he's done to my family. It wasn't just about one thing Barbara. I lost control of everything- including myself. Damnit it Babs you of all people should know what that cost me! I rode a fine line between being Batman and sinking into something far darker. That night, as they took the Joker away, I came this close to becoming just….like…him…" he told her coldly.

"You could never become like that Bruce," she whispered back at him, her throat suddenly dry as she saw something in his eyes that she had never seen before.

He shook his head slowly, reigning in the dark beast that had suddenly swelled up before her, giving her a glimpse into just how close he truly had become to losing it that night. "I can, and I almost did Barbara. He had already broken me. Had I come home that night to face what he had done to you and Selina, I would have descended into the same dark madness that drives him to kill. Can you honestly say that if that had happened, you would have sat by and let someone else deal with me?"

Barbara looked away, tears in her eyes. It had been an unspoken pact between Bruce, Dick, and herself. "You know I wouldn't…and neither would Dick."

He was crouching in front of her again, earnest blue eyes searching her out. "That's what kept me from returning Barbara. The Joker may have taken your legs, but I wasn't about to take your soul."

"Damnit Bruce we needed you," she told him vehemently as she slammed her hands on the sides of her wheelchair hard enough to make him wince. "We needed you then more than ever."

She knew there was nothing that could be done about the past anymore. And as much as she hated to admit it, it had probably been the wisest thing for him to leave. If he had truly gone off the deep end, she doubted she could have handled the emotional fallout from being newly paralyzed and having to hunt down and stop her former friend and mentor.

Still, it felt good to finally say those words. To finally be able to freely admit just how alone and scared she had felt those first few months.

He bowed his graying head, and sighed heavily. "And for that I will never forgive myself Barbara. I don't expect you to forgive me for what I did, but I wanted you to know that I'm sorry. And that…I'm proud of you. I always knew you were far braver than me Babs. That's why I can live with the fact that Helena had you to raise her after Selina was killed." His eyes lifted to convey the truth behind such a rare admission.

"Then you don't regret that I introduced Helena to the world that has taken so much from us?" It was a question that had been haunting her for years.

He smiled at her slightly. "Given her heritage, it was inevitable. Those girls trust you with their lives Barbara…so do I," he told her firmly as he stood. "This new generation of crime-fighters is going to give the crime world a run for its money," he added with an amused look. "You've made one hell of a mentor Babs."

Her lips quirked upwards slightly. "I had a good teacher."

"Get some rest," Bruce said as he squeezed the hand that had rested on top of his for a second. He moved to leave, but she spoke his name quietly just as he reached the door. He glanced back.

"Breakfast tomorrow?"

He nodded. "I'd like that. There's more we need to talk about." And then he left her to ponder that statement as he set out to locate Dick.

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Castle Wyvern

Manhattan

"Elisa?" Angela asked hesitantly, seeing bloody bandages strewn about the floor in front of the large mirror that had once decorated the room in one corner. The reflective surface now lay in fragments on the floor, a bloody handprint smearing the wooden frame and then tracking along the walls and furniture towards the bathroom.

Running water could be heard from inside, and Angela called out Elisa's name once more, fear creeping into her voice. There was no response, and the young woman crept towards the bathroom, a sick feeling slowly beginning to build in her stomach. She pushed the door open, eyes scanning the room furtively for her friend.

To her immediate relief, Elisa was immersed in a large bathtub. But that relief was short-lived when Angela took in Elisa's current state. Her face was completely uncovered, the horrific wounds unprotected and oozing. One arm was draped over the edge of the tub, loosely clutching a bottle of alcohol, as blood slowly pooled beneath it from her fresh injuries.

Angela rushed forward, and crouched next to Elisa. "Elisa?" she gasped, shocked by what she was seeing.

"I'm not in the best mood right now Angela," Elisa mumbled as she hefted the bottle to take another sip. The alcohol buzz combined with the pain killers she had been on, had long since killed any physical or emotion pain she had been feeling when she had first entered the tub. All she really wanted now, was to drink herself into oblivion and not dream for one night.

That action was halted however when Angela reached out and snatched the bottle away with a distressed rumble from her chest. "Elisa you shouldn't be drinking in your condition! How did you get this?"

"'Mazin' what one can find after a little exploring."

"Elisa...what happened?"

Her friend cracked her good eye open slightly, squinting against the faint light. An unpleasant chuckle bubbled up from her chest. "You're joking right?"

Angela faltered for a minute, unsure of what to say. The nurse had informed her of Elisa's numerous requests to remove the bandages, and explained why they had wanted to wait. Elisa had obviously taken matters into her own hands tonight however, and was not taking what she saw very well.

Elisa didn't give her a chance to answer however. She sat up in her bath suddenly, flipped off the faucet as water sloshed all over and fixed Angela with as good as a glare as she could manage. "How could all of you sit there and lie to me!" she demanded.

Angela's eyes flared suddenly. "I didn't lie to you Elisa. Yes the injuries are bad, but the doctors and nurses say that you will heal. They were frank about the extent of you injuries from the beginning and none of us have any reason to mistrust them on anything else they say. How can you even suggest that any of us- that I would lie to you about something like this?"

Elisa stared at her for a long minute. "Look at me Angela. Look me in the eye and tell me that all of this will really heal."

Angela did just that, fully believing it with all her heart. Elisa merely snorted, and shook her head as she sank back down in the tub. "You're as delusional as you father was," she muttered.

That brought Angela to her feet. "What is wrong with you! How can you say something like that?" the girl asked, hurt beyond words.

This seemed to spark Elisa's ire once more because she spun in the tub, fairly quickly given her injuries, and pushed herself to her feet. "What's wrong with me! I'll tell you what's wrong with me! I've spent the last six years of my life, giving everything I've had, everything I am, to help protect you guys. I've willingly put my life, my job, and my heart on the line for this Clan. Now I've lost it all, and yet you all still continue to dwell in this fantasyland that everything will work out and be okay. It won't Angela…it simply won't," Elisa said harshly.

"Your father died the other night, truly believing there could be peace between our races, now that Canmore was dead. But the harsh reality is that there are probably five more like him just ready to take his place, and I have nothing left to give. I'm done Angela. If the Clan wishes to continue in this crazy crusade to unite our races, then so be it. But I can't help you out anymore…the costs," her throat tightened up and she was forced to swallow several times before she spoke the next words. "The costs have been too much for me, and I can't do this any more."

Angela could only stare at Elisa, the words a verbal slap. There was a sudden rush of blood past her ears, and all the air seemed to have been sucked out of the room as she finally comprehended what Elisa was saying. "Y-you…turning your back on the Clan?" she finally stuttered out.

"I can't be responsible for you anymore," Elisa whispered hoarsely.

There was a deafening silence, and then Angela turned and fled, a choked sob echoing in Elisa's ears long after the girl had left. Grimacing, the detective reached down for the forgotten bottle, took a very long drink, and sank back into the soothing waters. As her mind began to aimlessly drift, she idly wondered two things. How long would it take before another of the Clan came barging in? And would she pass out in the tub before that happened, and perhaps save everyone the headache of the fight that was sure to ensue?