Yay for no Sunday School! So..since i don't have it..I'll just type this out...;D Thanks for the reviews, everyone!
Chapter 3
Maes and Elysia left the house they went up quickly. Elysia was happy that she finally found someone sane, that she could actually get candy from. And Maes was happy that he could finally find someone who was actually sane. Maes stepped up to Edward and grinned, whereas Edward's mind was screaming 'Get away from that madman!'.
"What's with that face? Does your back still hurt?" Maes asked ad tilted his head onto his side, with a look of concern on his face.
"NO! It's umm..My stomach!" He placed his arms on his stomach and began groaning in 'pain'. He prayed that maybe Hughes could just let him leave and be in peace. But knowing him, he probably would do something stupid...Like kick him in the back again.
"Me too!" Al yelled out. Ed gave an uncertain look to his brother. "I can feel it! The rust! It's everywhere!" He put both his hands on his head and fell down on the ground and began to twitch. It really looked like he was having a seizure of some sort. "MAKE IT STOP!" he yelled out into the night.
Roy, realizing his chance, bent down and took a deep breath. "Alphonse! Are you okay?" He lay his head down near his flailing arms and purposely got himself hit by one of them. He could've sworn that there were yellow birds flying around him but quickly got up and realized the blood dripping off the side of his face.
"Oh my! It looks as though I am bleeding! I guess I should go home!" Roy told Hughes and got up. His tone was as fake as any fake tone could get. You wouldn't ever see Roy Mustang as an actor for ANY movie.
Hughes blankly stared at everyone. His insides were screaming their head off, for he could see right through them.He really couldn't take it anymore and burst out laughing right then and there. "Next time, get more practice!"
Roy, now disheartened, took his am slowly and began to wipe off the blood on the side of his face. Edward stopped groaning and took his hands down on his side. And Alphonse stopped his 'seizure' and got upright. They would seriously do anything to get out of this situation. But who wouldn't?
"And let's go!" Hughes flew off with his daughter to the next house and Ed, Al, and Roy trudged ahead. Their heads were hanging in front of them and they barely lifted their feet off the ground. (A/N : Awww. Poor everyone! Especially Roy! hugs Roy plushie and stabs Ed voodoo doll)
Roy suddenly realized that the cut he had gotten was still dripping blood. He took his sleeve and wipe it again, only to find it wouldn't stop. (A/N: Oh em eff geee! Head injury..O.o rhymes...). He just took his sleeve and kept it right on top of the cut. "Apply pressure and keep the cut above your heart," he remembered his military training he had gotten while joining. And he also remembered his crazy Health teacher back when he was a kid. He just then suddenly realized how much Hughes was like his Health teacher. But he threw that thought out of the window.
So he just kept his arm there, right on the cut. Pressure. And..well his head was already above his heart. So there we go. He looked to his side were Edward was walking. On
Ed's other side was Al who was very quiet at the moment. Had he picked up another cat while we weren't looking?' He asked himself, realizing that when Al was this quiet, he had probably picked up a stray animal of some sort.
They all stayed at the front porch were Maes and Elysia were. They really didn't want to go up there at the moment. Maes rung the doorbell and a young woman appeared in the doorway. She stared at Elysia first and then up at Maes.
"Trick-or-Treat!" she said out happily. The woman bent down happily and began to talk to her.
"So what are you supposed to be this year?" she asked with a smile on her face.
"A gangster!" Elysia replied in a sing-song voice.
The woman looked up at Maes with the what-on-earth-are-you-teaching-your-child expression on her face. Maes looked away quickly and began whistling loudly. The woman rolled her eyes and turned back to Elysia and handed her a couple of pieces of candy. She stood back up, waved at the two, and shut her door quickly. She made a mental note to herself to keep her children away from that man.
They both walked down and were in front of everyone else.
"Can we go home, now?" Roy asked, slipping his left hand in his pocket while his right one was still on the side of his face.
"But we barely went anywhere! There's so much more houses to go!" Hughes held his hands up out into the night sky and left a confused Roy by his side.
"I hope you don't mean to go and visit every single house in Central..." Edward whispered, under his breath. But Hughes had heard him already.
"Of course I meant to do that! It wouldn't be much fun without going everywhere!"
"NO!" Roy yelled out and grasping Hughes's clothes. "I am not going to go to every single house in Central...I'll just go home and you guys can go do it yourselves..." He clenched his teeth and was breathing very deeply. But apparently that yell had no effect on Maes.
"Aww. But it won't be fun without you Roy!" Hughes swiftly grabbed the pair of handcuffs and cuffed them onto Roy and himself. Roy was shocked.
"Where the hell did you get those?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Let's not get into that," Maes whispered and began to walk away, dragging Roy along with him. Right then Roy had an idea.
"No come on! I'm sure that story is very interesting!" Roy yelled out to his best friend. His plan to was to make Hughes tell the story. And knowing Hughes he'd probably go and tell out the story of him and his wife as well. Maybe if he was lucky Hughes would through in a few pictures too. If it worked right, it would keep Hughes busy for hours and when he was done, he'd realize how late it was and go home. It was probably the only way to keep his reputation from going down. And was probably the only time he would ever be happy that Hughes had his camera.
"You are very right! And a very interesting story it was! It started out with a fight to the death between me and Chomotikato Po!" Everyone twitched at that name but Hughes didn't seem to notice and continued on. "It was a fight to the death and I was disadvantaged the moment we started. It was nighttime and he had night vision goggles! We were in an alleyway and he began to attack swiftly. At first I was doing very well and dodged all his attacks." Roy began to doze off. "He was very strong, I'll tell you that! I don't think anyone but me would've survived!" Edward doubted that very much. "His first attack to have actually hit me was his weak punch. It made me stagger back a little but I was right back on top of him!" Ed was about to break for it when he noticed that Maes was looking right at him. "The fight was long and dangerous! He realized his end when I took out my trump card. He told me he'd end it right then and there and he threw himself off the cliff we were fighting on!"
"But, I thought you said you guys were fighting in a dark alleyway.." Ed replied, uncertainly, remembering clearly that Hughes had said 'dark alleyway' somewhere in there.
"Noo..I said cliff! As I was saying, before he jumped off he dropped this pair of special handcuffs. And i realized that since I was the one who brought him to rest, I should take them and use them for my own purpose to fight crime and save Central!" Hughes took up a mighty pose; something Armstrong would probably do. Ed, Al, Elysia, and Roy made sidewards glances toward him. But..As planned, Hughes continued.
"And when I came home my wife was terrified! Blood was stained all over-"
"But I thought he did suicide..You couldn't possibly have gotten blood on yourself when he did that.." Edward questioned with an evil grin on his face. 'Maybe I could get him to get so embarrassed he'll go home!' But at that thought, as if Roy could read minds, Roy nudged his elbow into Ed's stomach.
"Let him continue," Roy whispered to Ed. Ed was shocked at this thought. 'Let him continue...LET HIM CONTINUE? Is he mad!' Roy nudged him again and gave him the death glare. "Please go on!" Roy chipped back at Maes happily.
"Well..When I got home my wife saw me and she was terrified! Speaking of my wife, isn't she the most beautiful thing you ever saw?" Maes pulled out over 5 dozen fulls of pictures and all of them seemed to be on his wife. "I took this one last week! And this one two days ago! Isn't she amazing? Oh my god! Here's one on her with ELYSIA!" Hughes squealed out like a little fangirl and held out his pictures right in front of Ed's and Roy's face. All the way in the back Elysia blushed.
Roy tried to keep himself calm, and truly tried to make a straight face when he said "She looks so cute, Maes! And in this one she's even more cute!".
"Don't you think so!" Maes squealed out again.
"Of course!" Roy was keeping himself from letting his eye twitch. It might ruin it.
Ed started in shock. He could totally dub himself insane. First Hughes was actually dressing up as a gangster, claiming he didn't need to buy any new clothes for he had some. Second, Roy was actually taking interest in Hughes's pictures. Thirdly, WHAT THE HELL WAS HE DOING HERE TAKING ALL OF IT!
Ed concentrated and tried to ignore Roy's and Maes's squealing. He looked toward Al in a serious face and walked toward him. He had a plan. But it might make him get killed. But anything was worth doing to get out of this...
"Alphonse..We have to beat them up..and knock em unconscious..Throw them in an alleyway..and just play it off and walk away..." Edward put his fist on his hip and made his 'elderly-brother-knows-best' attitude.
"But..Isn't that a little harsh...?" Al asked with a caring look.
"It's going to save us.." Edward said back with a serious look on his face. He sighed and turned back to Roy and Maes, and stared in shock. 'You can't be serious,' They were both laughing their heads off and kept sharing the pictures.
"Weeeelll..I'm pooped..Let's go home Elysia!" Maes Hughes grabbed his daughter's hands and they both waved as they walked off in the distance.
"Geez, they're going home already? They barely went anywhere..." Ed mumbled off, glaring at Mustang who was wiping sweat off his forehead.
"Well wasn't that the point, Fullmetal?" Roy overheard Edward and just pointed out the obvious...Which..obviously..Ed couldn't see.
"But I wanted to drive him off!" Edward yelled back at Mustang, acting like a total child fighting about a toy he wanted or something.
"Who the hell cares?" Roy looked off in a random direction. "I don't know. I feel as if we've missed something important."
"Like what?" Alphonse asked, curiously.
"I dunno... Oh well," Roy shrugged it off and started walking home when he called back at the Elric brothers. "Oh, go home you two. No point in staying there all night," Roy walked off in another direction and waved his hand in the air, stating goodbye.
"Well...Let's go home. I have work tomorrow, too...And a report to hand in..."Edward groaned, rubbing his head. He'd wished he'd finished it earlier, now that he was so tired. 'Well that's what you get for procrastinating,' his inner self yelled at him. "Shut up, you. I never listen to you anyway." Ed mumbled under his breath. He started walking toward the military lodgings when he called back to Al. "Are you coming or what?"
"Oh yeah!" Al ran off toward Ed and they started going off home.
-next day-
Edward yawned as he finished his report on his latest mission. It'd taken him all night and now that he was done, he had to go to work and actually hand it in. Then he'd probably have to take in all of Roy's insults off him being a lazy idiot who saves things til the last minute. And Hughes, who would probably be showing off his latest batch of pictures. But Ed decided he'd come home early and sleep.
"Al, I'm off." Edward grabbed his red coat from off the back of the sofa and walked toward the front door. "Al?" Edward called through the house.
"Yes, brother?" Al peeked his head out of the room he was in and looked in Ed's direction.
"What's gotten into you? Anyway, I'm off to headquarters...See ya!" Ed waved and was about to step out of the door when he heard..a very loud..and crude meow.
"MEWWWW!" it cried out.
"AL? WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!" Edward glared in Al's direction and Al looked away.
"It's my stomach! I'm really hungry!"
"MEEOOOWWWW!"
"AL! It's in pain!"
"No it's not! I'm taking care of it!"
"FINE!" Ed yelled out. He wondered how well his brother could take care of a cat. He wondered if he could actually do it. He bet himself 5 dollars that Al would fail. 'Wat kind of shitty bet is $5?' His inner self yelled at him again.
Edward ignored himself and shut the door to his temporary home. He walked down the hallway and ignored his inner self for a long time. When he got down to Mustang's office...It was quieter than usual. Perhaps Hughes hadn't come in yet. Edward let himself in, knowing that Mustang probably wouldn't mind. And..To his surprise, everyone was actually working.
"I have gone insane," Edward was about to let himself out of Mustang's office and back ito his room when Roy called him back and told him to come and hand his report in.
"I hope you didn't procrastinate like you always do, and save it until the last moment." Roy said calmly, acting psychic again. Edward ignored him and Roy took it as he did save it til the last moment.
"Oh yes, I had something to tell you, Fullme-"
"I'm here!" Hughes burst through the door with a sing song voice again, nearly killing everyone from heart attack. Fury rustled through his desk for his inhaler (A/N: XDDD I always picture Fury the kind of person who'd have that.). Roy fell over on his chair and the only one who acted as if nothing happened was Hawkeye...As usual...
"Please be quieter, sir.." Riza said calmly.
"YES! Be quiter! Please.." Roy angrily growled back, not forgetting the previous night's 'adventures'.
"I was talking to you, Colonel.."
Roy's eye twitched as he remembered that Hawkeye, too, would probably ignore him. And all because Hughes had let his daughter in on what he thought of the two of them. "Why are you here, anyway?" Roy spoke out.
"Oh yeah! To give you the pictures from yesterday!" Hughes pulled out an envelope and presented it to everyone. "Looky..an envelope..."
"Pictures..? I'm not taking home any of those pictures of Elysia NOR your wife!"
"Not those pictures! These pictures!" Hughes opened the envelope and released the pictures that seemed oh-so-important. Everyone, including Hawkeye, got up and looked around the pictures. They stared at Roy blankly and getting annoyed, Roy pulled out the pictures from Hughes and looked at them himself.
"WHEN THE HELL DID YOU TAKE THESE?" Roy screamed out, trying to hide the pictures from everyone. Total shock. Anger. Embarrassment. And even emotions he didn't even know existed came out all at once. He took the pictures and ripped them in half in front of everyone and pulled on his alchemy gloves. Snapping his fingers, they burst into flames and Roy stomped on the ground, stopping the fire from spreading.
"Oh! Not to worry! I have seconds!" Hughes pulled out another envelope! The exact same kind which seemed to be fit with so many pictures. Roy snapped his fingers without even realizing it, and they burst into flames, right in Hughes's hands.
"HEY WATCH IT! I only have one more copy!"
"EHHH!"
"Just kidding!" Hughes laughed heartily, and acted as if this was some kind of April Fools Joke. Everyone stared at Roy and their blank zombie-like stares were getting worse.
"I was somewhat expecting this..." Fury sighed.
"We all guessed this would happen," Falman said, nervously.
"Yep..because that was...-" Breda started.
"THAT WAS MY GIRLFRIEND YOU WERE KISSING!" Havoc screamed out, letting balls of spit hit Mustang's face.
"Well...obviously she prefers me...over you.." Mustang said, reluctantly. He wondered how Hughes had gotten hold of those. He wondered how Hughes had gotten into his bedroom and actually taken those pictures.
"Poor, Rachel! She probably has Mustang germs all over her, now!" Havoc fell over and supposedly began 'weeping' over his girlfriend. Mustang scratched his head and tried to think of something. Quick.
"Uhm...I'm sure1st lieutenant Hawkeye would love to go out with you!" Roy pointed to Hawkeye, who suddenly picked up her gun and threw it straight at Mustang's face. Roy fell backwards from trying to dodge the gun. "Hey watch it!" Roy yelled at Hawkeye.
"You watch your mouth. Next time I'll go throw a bar of soap in there," she said back, calmly, totally ignoring everyone else, and going back to her desk.
"Oooohh...The Colonel got told..." Breda whispered to everyone and snickered loudly. But only doing this resulted in getting punched in the head by Mustang.
"And now that I'm in front of you-" Roy started talking to Hughes.
"NOW THAT YOU'RE ACTUALLY HERE I REMEMBER HAVING TO DO SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT!" Hughes shot out of the room before anyone could even notice it.
"Geez..." Edward muttered. "Anywaaaay, before Hughes came here..what did you want to tell me?" he asked remembering the reason he was actually still in that room.
"Ah yes. I...forgot." Roy said simply.
"Well whatever," Ed started walking out of the door, praying that maybe just maybe things could just go back to normal for once. But he knew that it would take a long time. He glanced at his steel arm and kept walking back toward his room. Maybe everyone could just forget about what happened!
But knowing them...They wouldn't.
MEH..okay..done.. ; This chapter was really boring to write XD
"I'm sure the 1st lieutenant would love to go out with you!" best quote ever...
Anyway..I got this new idea thing..for another small thing to work on..But i havent even started yet..But i got the general idea. Its gonna be really funny, though..I might've given up on those other fics I was writing.. . I dunno...They just became boring to write..Maybe I'll come back to them eventually..Until then, I'll write little drabbles or something...XP