His body began to revert back to its human shape, now that Tsuzuki's powers had finally been cut. He bit back a scream as his wings were forced inside, the broken appendages pure agony for him to bear. He stumbled and slid down the wall, leaving a broad, bloody smear. His whole back was an open, bleeding wound. Each breath was a challenge.

Watson made a reappearance, his misshapen face full of worry, and Ryu smiled tiredly.

"Get a message to the others. But warn them to come here."

"Yes, sir," was the immediate answer and the servant disappeared again.

The decision whether or not Tsuzuki would be safe from whatever had tried to take him was not up to Ryu, not even up to Touda, but the demon suspected that while they had battled the darkness that had changed their friend.

Later. Later he would find out. Later he would ask.

Now... now he just needed to heal, like all of them.

And around him, the Palace repaired itself.

° ° °

Sohryu startled awake out of his doze when he felt the non-stop feed of power snap and break. It was like being able to breathe again and he inhaled deeply, his soul trembling with relief. On the bed, Tenkou finally fell into a resting sleep and Kijin followed her, while Suzaku sagged against the headboard, eyes closed, face pale.

"It's over," she whispered.

Sohryu nodded. He only wished he knew what had happened. He wanted to know how Hajime was, he wanted to see him, he wanted to check on everyone, but his body demanded rest. Closing his eyes he allowed his mind to finally quiet down enough to slip into sleep, to regenerate.

° ° °

Watari was asleep. Finally. On Tatsumi's bed, under several blankets, still mostly clothed. Tatsumi looked at the tousled blond head and smiled with exhaustion. He felt so tired as well, his whole body aching from exertion, from channeling so much power and controlling such an amount of shadows, but he just couldn't sleep. Not after what had happened, what was still happening.

Terazuma was back and currently drifting in and out of sleep, too weak to do much more than eat and sleep anyway. Sohryu had appeared in Meifu a few hours ago and he was refusing to leave.

No one but Tsuzuki would dare to order him to do so anyway.

But Tsuzuki was in no condition to do so at all. He was still at the Palace with Hisoka and Touda by his side, recovering.

He shivered, feeling so abominably cold. Regeneration of his body had jumpstarted only slowly since he had again given up speedy healing for more fighting power. There was a mumble from his lover and Watari snuggled closer to him, arms tightening around Tatsumi's chest.

"Sleep," a drowsy voice murmured.

"I can't."

Because there is so much I need to understand. Like your own position in this, Taka. Who are you? I thought I knew. I thought you had told me. But there is so much more. You were one of the Five! You were the Chief Researcher and you gave life to Mother!

Sleepy, amber eyes peeked out from under the blond curls.

"Sleep, Seii," Watari whispered, his own eyes reflecting so much pain and sorrow. "Right now, that's what we need. Later, we talk. I promise."

But they had already talked and it was what had Tatsumi in pieces.

Watari reached up and cupped the pale face with one hand. "Seii..." he implored.

Blue eyes closed in desperation and Tatsumi felt the caress even more intensely. "Taka..." he whispered.

"We will get through this," Watari promised. "Sleep."

And exhaustion dragged him down. Safely ensconced in his lover's arms, Tatsumi Seiichiro allowed his mind to finally surrender – but his dreams were another matter.

° ° °

Tsuzuki wanted to scream at the suffocating darkness that surrounded his mind. He had thought he'd gotten away, but he was mistaken. He sought to find his way through this nightmare and his body tried to force itself out of its prison.

Power churned at the edges of his consciousness, alluring and cold and dangerous and demonic.

He looked into the eyes of his other self, of the demon.

A voice whispered to him, but it couldn't be heard over the panic his mind projected.

The link to Touda.

Shields.

So many shields.

I hurt Touda, he thought as memories flashed by. I hurt Ryu. I... killed Muraki.

-- 'Please... release me, Tsuzuki. I beg of you. Give me freedom.'

-- 'Thank you.'

He sobbed softly at the memories. As much as he had hated and feared this man, he had never thought about cold-bloodedly taking his life.

-- 'I am a failed product. Give me your mercy.'

It hurt so much feeling the icy blackness coming from the bond, telling him he was alone. His body wanted to react by fighting, but he was too weak. His breathing pattern changed; it became rapid. He was beginning to find it hard to get the air he needed into his lungs.

A hand touched his face and he couldn't help but jerk away from it. The voice began to talk to him then, calling his name and telling him that he was going to be fine, that he was here with him now. His mind finally forced the scream to leave his body. His pain-filled form began to fight. He couldn't stop it. It was more a reaction than a request. He wanted it to stop but it wouldn't. He tried to ward off the hand touching him, but something was keeping him down.

Hands gripped his face and held it tight. A voice began to whisper in his ear, but he couldn't calm down; the fear was too great. He struggled even harder. The hands still held his head in a vice-like grip and finally words filtered through.

"Asato... you're safe..."

Hisoka?

"Open your eyes."

His body went limp and he tried to force his eyes open. It was an effort. The blurry image that greeted him turned into face.

"'soka...?" he whispered, his voice rough and weak.

"Yes. You are safe, Asato. Relax."

The green eyes filled his whole field of vision, so deep and calm and filled with more than was possible. They held emotions that threatened to overwhelm Tsuzuki.

"'soka..."

"It'll be okay," his partner said softly, those emerald eyes drilling into Tsuzuki's blurry ones.

"...stay...?"

"Forever."

He smiled a little.

"...thank you..."

With that, sleep claimed him again.

° ° °

Hisoka sat at Tsuzuki's bedside in one of the many guest rooms in the Palace of Candles, wondering how often that had happened lately. Well, it hadn't been such a long time since the last bedside vigil, when Tsuzuki had battled the mirrored effects of a virus that had struck down Touda.

How long ago had that been?

He didn't know.

He sighed and reached for one lax hand, stroking over the slender fingers, noting how unblemished, how unhurt Tsuzuki was this time. No harm had come to him physically, but he had completely exerted himself.

Hisoka shuddered as he remembered the darkness that had come forth, the power that had leveled most of the OmniFair grounds.

"You're so powerful," he whispered, for the first time no longer envious.

No, there was nothing to envy. Tsuzuki was bearing a curse, just like he had until recently. With the death of Muraki, that curse had been lifted. Hisoka felt little like celebrating right now. Tsuzuki had always been living a life on the edge each time he used that power, each time Touda pulled him away from the final step into the uncontrolled rage that could mean the end of them all. He was controlling something he feared, something he didn't want, and Hisoka understood that wishing for that kind of power on his part was foolish.

Now, that power had been unleashed, had been triggered by Muraki's actions. Hisoka had yet to understand so many things about what had happened.

How could Muraki have entered Meifu undetected?

-- the same way those devils had managed, a voice murmured.

Why had Muraki wanted to trigger Tsuzuki and then asked of him to take his life? What had been the plan? Why Tsuzuki? Why had all that happened just recently and not in the last seventy-plus years? Touda had become Tsuzuki's shikigami so long ago... why had he been bonded to him only just recently?

So many questions, but he had at least one answer.

Power meant nothing. Power was just the easy way out. Tsuzuki was doing more without those powers than others with theirs. His fear to use what he could had made him into what he was today, and in Hisoka's eyes he was the bravest shinigami to walk this realm.

"I love you," he murmured and leaned over, kissing the pale lips.

Tsuzuki was suffering from total exhaustion. He was healing inside and so was Touda, who was never far from his master. Right now he was curled up and sleeping in the bed next to Tsuzuki's, face lined with exhaustion, pale, and with shadows under his closed eyes. One hand was outstretched, spanning the gap between the two beds that had been pushed next to each other, and touching Tsuzuki's other arm.

Hisoka finally crawled into the bed with Tsuzuki and closed his eyes. Feeling his lover close, feeling those familiar emotions again, not the aberration of before, he allowed his mind to relax.

° ° °

Ryu had recovered quickly after Tsuzuki had nearly taken him apart. His demonic side was taking care of that, and it wasn't like he could really die. But he had also grown quiet, had pulled away, even from Watson, and the gnome was growing more and more worried about his master. Touda and Tsuzuki were mostly sleeping, and Hisoka didn't leave his lover alone.

The Count was hiding – from himself.

Hugging himself, the slender man was leaning against one of the high windows, staring out into the distance, his mind flashing back again and again to the moment of pain when his true self had broken through. The seal had dissolved the first time when he had entered Hell and he had become the demon that he had absorbed over two millennia ago. It had been agony.

Back again in Meifu, he had once again shown his human façade, thanks to the reinserted seal. Only Enma or a being of the same power could forever remove the seal, and Astaroth had only triggered him without shattering what locked the demon inside the beautiful human body. It had been a game for the Lord of Hell, showing Ryu who he was, dangling that horror in front of him.

Tsuzuki's attack had ended that brief respite. Ryu had never been the least disturbed by his appearance, but now the red eyes told him what lurked in there, what he was.

A creature of Hell. A monster.

Ryu shivered and screwed his eyes shut. He had seen little of himself, but he had felt the thing inside, the insidious, terrifying strength, the power, the violence and the lust for... more power.

He felt so sick.

The pain echoed through his mind and he groaned softly. His stomach clenched and his insides twisted in pain.

There was a shift in power in the Palace and a moan of denial left his lips.

No, not him. Please...

But there was no mistaking who had entered. His lover's aura was unique.

Ryu bit his lower lip and straightened with an effort. It was bad enough that he had guests here, but he could at least hide behind the mask. For Rikugo... there was no barrier. He could see him. It was his ability.

°

Rikugo realized from the moment he looked at his lover that something was terribly wrong. First, there was the mask. Ryu never wore it when they were together. Then there was the aura. It felt... sick. He had heard briefly from Touda about the attack, but the serpent had been rather close-mouthed. Rikugo had thought it to be exhaustion and worry about Tsuzuki.

Now he wasn't so sure.

"Ryu?" he asked softly.

"Hey," was the tremulous reply.

"Ryu, take off the mask, please?"

Rikugo had no problem seeing the Count as Ryu, but he wanted his lover to voluntarily show himself.

Shaking fingers took off the half-mask and Rikugo felt shock settle. Gods, he looked bad. Pale, haggard, like he hadn't slept for a very long time.

"Ryu?" he queried.

"I'm okay," was the reply.

Sure...

"Ryu?" he asked again.

Those red eyes held his for a moment, then dropped. Rikugo stepped closer, but Ryu moved back.

"Ryu, what's wrong?"

"Everything," was the soft answer.

Everything... like Ryu himself. He had been his true self for the very first time, had been to Hell, the home realm of the creature he had become, and Rikugo had seen the demon form.

"This is about what happened," the shikigami murmured and his lover flinched. "Ryu, I knew what you were. Not from the first day on, but I saw you once. Briefly. In your full form."

Ryu paled and stared at his lover. "W-when?"

"When you lost it. When you attacked Tsuzuki in front of me. I Looked at you and for a moment two images overlapped. I saw you and I saw the creature of Hell."

Ryu stumbled a few steps back until he collided with the wall. He was trembling with the reaction to Rikugo's words.

"No..."

"I saw you, Ryu. I accept what you are."

"How can you? How can you love this monster?" he yelled. "I'm your worst enemy! I could... I could kill you... if I ever lost control of myself completely..."

Rikugo closed the distance between them, looking down into the terrified eyes. "You lost it once and it was very much completely. You attacked Tsuzuki, but you never once turned into your other form. Only Hell can do that. The seal Enma-Daiou put on you prevents that."

Ryu closed his eyes, shivering more. Rikugo pulled the stiffening form into his embrace.

"I love you, Ryu. I saw what you are, I know what you are, and I love you."

"Why?" came the soft whimper.

"Because I do. Do I need a reason to feel as I do?" Rikugo placed a gentle kiss on the pale lips, feeling each quiver. "We've been through so much and I will always be at your side, Ryu. I love you."

--

Ryu cursed himself for his weakness as he clung his lover, seeking his warmth, his reassurance, and Rikugo just gently kissed him, holding him. He couldn't understand why Rikugo even touched him any more. He was a monster and scared by himself, of himself... How could the shikigami even trust him?

"I Looked, Ryu," came the soft whisper. "I Saw and I accepted. You're no monster. I love you. You're a man. I love you."

Tears tracked down his cheeks, emotions from the last twenty-four hours breaking through. The horrifying discovery of what he was still echoed in his sleep and he was terrified of the creature laying dormant inside. Rikugo kept him in his embrace until Ryu finally detached himself. He drew a deep breath and steadied himself.

"Ryu, I don't lie," the shinigami said calmly. "And I love you. Never doubt it."

"I'm just... scared, Rikugo. Of myself. I knew what I am... but I've never seen it before. Never felt it..."

"Now you know. You can be stronger because of it."

"I'm not so sure."

Rikugo's smiled. "I am." He gently tugged his lover with him. "C'mon. I think you could need something nice to eat."

"Rikugo..."

"Ryu," he said firmly.

The demon sighed. "Okay... okay."

° ° °

Byakko stretched, feeling sore muscles complain, but it was a good feeling. He was still tired, exhausted from the strain of the last few days, but he was still happier than before. He knew that Touda was okay, that he would remain with Tsuzuki until their friend was better. Tuszuki himself was sleeping a lot, like Touda, and he was his old self once more.

What had launched the outbreak was still not clear. The name Muraki had come up once or twice, and while Byakko knew that Muraki was a sore spot for Tsuzuki, he couldn't believe that their master would truly lose himself in the darkness like he had over him.

No, there had been more. There had to be more!

He was sure that answers could be found, but for now everyone had to recover.

Walking into the main room where the servants had prepared a meal, Byakko had the niggling feeling that this had only been the beginning. Something had finally broken free, and it wouldn't be tamed again.

Whatever it was, they were all ready. The first alert had been Tsuzuki's loss of control. Now... now everyone was apprehensive, wary, and ready to fight back – against a faceless enemy.

An enemy that had been around for a while now.

Byakko took his place and the servants poured tea and offered food. He nodded at them to leave it to him. He wanted to be alone, read the news scrolls another servant had delivered, and he wanted to think.

There was a lot to think about.

And it all made some strange kind of sense. Everything. Even his own, personal problems.

Byakko knew he had to talk to the others soon.

To be continued in Empty Spaces. Coming to an archive near you mid-December 2005