Title: His Brain is Steaming

Author: postitnotes

Disclaimer: I do not own Firefly.

"It's steaming," River whispered.

After recovering from the shock of River's sudden appearance in the kitchen, Zoe's face wrinkled in confusion. "What's steaming?"

"His brain."

"Whose brain?"

River anxiously glanced over her shoulder. "Jayne's."

"Ah. Wasn't he supposed to, erm, keep an eye on you when you were spending time off ship?"

River nodded. "He did. But I didn't listen to him and now he's mad at me."

Zoe cleared her throat. "What happened?"

River yanked out a chair and sat across the table from Zoe. "First there was a baby."

"A baby."

"Uh-huh. We passed a family and I followed them so I could look at the baby. Jayne had told me to stay where I was while he stopped in a shop, so he wasn't happy when I wasn't there."

"Oh." Zoe nodded knowingly. "I can understand why he would be mad."

"He wasn't really mad then, just upset. The mad came later."

"Oh."

"Then there was the giraffe," River continued. "When he finally found me again he started to yell at me. But I saw the giraffe so I walked away while he was yelling."

"The planet is known for its giraffes."

"This was a very nice one. It was a little lonely, though, because its family wasn't around."

"How do-" Zoe began and then shook her head. "Never mind. Continue."

"Well, I was talking to the giraffe when Jayne came over again. He was a little more upset, but he wasn't mad yet. He just grabbed my arm and dragged me away. When we were back in town he bought me this." River held out her arm, showing off a green bracelet.

Zoe grunted agreeably. "That's nice."

"Yes, it is," River murmured proudly as she stroked the bracelet. "He almost got me another one, but it was made of giraffe skin and I was afraid that it was a relative of Penny's."

"Penny?"

"The giraffe from before. That was its name."

"Of course it was."

"Anyway, after we left the store we passed a store that sells hats. I wanted to go in and pick one out for Cobby but he said-"

"Who's Cobby?" Zoe interrupted.

River giggled. "That's Jayne. Sometimes I like to call him that. He says he doesn't like it, though."

"I imagine he doesn't," Zoe muttered, shifting uncomfortably in her chair.

"Cobby said that it was getting late and that he was supposed to meet the captain at the ship. But I pulled him into the store anyway and picked out a hat for him. It took a while and by the time we got back to the ship we were much later than we were supposed to be." River let out a sigh of despair.

"So where is Jayne now?"

"The captain is yelling at him. I didn't mention that it was my fault." River bit her lip. "Now he's mad at me."

"Well," Zoe said as she rose to her feet. "That's a very interesting story. Perhaps you should stay away from Jayne for a while until he cools down."

"Where is she?" Jayne roared, his voice loud enough to cause the kitchen to shake.

"Or not," Zoe whispered, standing stiffly.

"Where is that gorram girl?"

River flinched as Jayne entered the kitchen. His face was red with rage as he stormed over to the table, his finger raised in an accusatory manner. "You-"

River slowly stood up and lifted her chin to meet Jayne's eyes. "I'm sorry for getting you in trouble with the captain. I should have told him that I was the reason we were late."

"Yes, you should have!" Jayne yelled.

River swayed slightly but steadied herself quickly. "I also want to thank you for spending time with me today. I did have fun, and I'm grateful for the bracelet." She leaned up and, to the surprise of Jayne and Zoe, she kissed him lightly on the cheek. "Perhaps we could do it again someday?"

Jayne was speechless as River skipped out of the room.