13.Title: Come What May – Impulse

Fandom: Bleach
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 3569
Characters: Ikkaku, Nemu, Yachiru, Renji, Yumichika, Hozukimaru

Summary: An experiment, if you will. Foot and mouth.

LJ-Cut: You just don't wanna get beat by a guy that's been fightin' all day.

"Shiny-shiny Head!"

"G'ah! Stop calling me stupid names!" Ikkaku grabbed Yachiru's belt and threw her off his neck. "And stop jumping on me!"

She giggled, flipping on her feet. "You're so funny!"

"Funny like a punch in the mouth…"

Either ignoring or completely missing the threat, Yachiru waved her little arms around. "Oo, oo! Shiny-shiny Head! Ken-chan has a mission for you!"

Ikkaku gritted his teeth against that stupid name. "Yeah? What?"

"The new guy from 5th division." She said. "Ken-chan wants you to show Tattoo Brows around."

He snorted. "Tattoo Brows?"

"I wouldn't be repeating that around. Shiny-shiny Head."

Baring his teeth, Ikkaku whirled around, snarling into someone's face. "The fuck you just say?"

A pair of slim eyes glared at him from under expensive looking shades. "I'm not likin' my nickname anymore than you are so don't even think about using it."

That got his hackles up. "Who the hell do you think yer talkin' to? I'm the 3rd seat of this division so you better be learnin' some fuckin' respect!"

"What, for a division of thugs? Yeah, right!"

"You think you're the shit, don't cha? Mr. Got-kicked-outta-5th-division."

"Hey, I didn't get kicked out ya bald retard! I wasn't reachin' my full potential there!"

"Yeah, you know what they mean when they say ya ain't reachin' your full potential? It means you SUCK, freak face!"

"Get the fuck outta my face, baldy, before you get your ass whooped-"

They were interrupted by Yachiru's giggle. "See? I told Ken-chan you two would be great friends! Shiny-shiny Head! He needs a room and stuff, so take care of it all!" She gave them a little wave before jumping the wall to terrorize someone else.

Ikkaku watched her go with a grimace. "Che. Just havin' her around puts me in a bad fuckin' mood."

"Tell me about it." The newcomer agreed. "She really knows how to piss people off."

They both glare at the wall before Ikkaku sighed. "Oh, yeah. Name's Madarame Ikkaku, by the way." He stuck his hand out. "Like I said, I'm the 3rd seat 'round here so if ya need anythin', go ahead 'n tell me."

"Hey, thanks." The other's grip was strong. "Abarai Renji. Former 5th seat of the 5th division. Nice to meet ya."

Except when Renji tried to pull his hand back, Ikkaku didn't let go. Instead, he leaned in close. "…We met somewhere, haven't we?"

Renji blinked. "Have we?"

"….yeah. Yeah, I think we have! You go to some seedy little bar down by the 10th district, don't you? Spend your weekends gamblin' and drinkin' there, right?"

"Yeah- hey, yeah!" Renji grinned. "Man, I never woulda guessed I'd meet you here!"

Ikkaku laughed. And then the smile dropped off his face and his grip became painful. "You owe me $200, asshole."

Renji's grin froze. "Er… well, the thing is I don't, uh, really have the money…"

"Oh really?"

"Really really."

A thin eyebrow rose up. "You could probably get a pretty penny from those shades ya got. Nice pair."

"Haha." Renji said dryly. "Uh, thanks."

"I ain't kiddin'."

"I ain't sellin' 'em."

They glared each other down, hands crushing each other. "Oh? They look brand new. Probably why you ain't got money."

"No they're not."

"Sure they are. Iba goes on about how great they are but he never buys 'em 'cause he isn't a moron."

Renji's eye twitched. "Are you lookin' for a fight? 'Cause you're really pissing me off, here."

"Like you could give me more than a work out-"

One hour, countless bandages, two broken teeth, one annoyed captain, two 4th division members, a couple binding spells, a pair of bruised egos and a good number of the 11th losing a lot of money later, Yumichika observed that Renji would fit in perfectly.

"Well, Nemu. You've been approved as my vice-captain. You should be happy to serve me directly."

"Yes, Mayuri-sama."

"However," his eyes narrowed, "when Urahara was captain, you listened to him almost as much as you listened to me."

"I apologize, Mayuri-sama."

"For that I must insure that you will listen to no one other than me." Wiry fingers gripped her chin. "Your uniform will change. This will be a physical reminder as to who you are submissive to. Do you understand, Nemu?"

She lowered her gaze modestly. "Yes, Mayuri-sama."

As tradition went, all newcomers had the option of gaining seats by fighting each seat, starting with the tenth. They had a week or until they lost to reach the highest possible spot. This was Renji's second day.

And he just blew Yumichika into a wall.

The gathered witness' jaws hit the ground in resounding silence, afraid to move as if this was some outlandish dream. Zabimaru's elongated segments zoomed back to the hilt and Renji bounced the flat edge of his Zanpakuto on his shoulder. With the weight of Zabimaru off his sword and chest, Yumichika let out a strained cough and fell to his knees.

"Che!" Renji glared. "The hell you holdin' back for? I know you got more than that in ya!"

Yumichika groaned, rubbing what was certain to be a mean bruise later. Zaraki chuckled, vaguely amused with the situation. He didn't know why Aizen wanted to get rid of the kid but hell if he wasn't just gonna be a waste in the 5th, anyway.

"Ah well." The redhead turned a mite gingerly. Not without his own wounds, the worst Renji suffered was a twisted knee and an impressive set of lacerations across his side from Yumichika. "Guess that means you're next, huh?"

Ikkaku didn't look up, laid out on the ground, half asleep. Renji's eye twitched.

"Hey, asshole!" He snapped. "Get up and fight me!"

"Don't wanna."

Eyes everywhere grew large and even Yachiru fell silent at that.

Renji stuttered. "Y-You can't say that!"

Ikkaku's brow furrowed. "Sure I can. You're beat up and exhausted. I'm rested."

"And…?" Zabimaru's hilt creaked under the pressure of his fist.

"And I ain't gonna beat ya when you're like that. People're gonna think I'm some kinda bully."

"You just don't wanna get beat by a guy that's been fightin' all day."

That got Ikkaku on his feet. He jabbed a finger at Renji. "I wouldn't even have ta release Hozukimaru to beat ya right now so shut the fuck up and accept my goddamn kindness!"

"You're up and here right now so just fight already!"

"Fuck no! You're already a higher seat than when you were in the 5th! Being 4th seat for a couple days should be a damn treat to you!"

Renji opened his mouth to snap again but Yumichika (far too calmly for a guy that had just been smashed half an inch into a wall) pointed out, "There's blood running down your leg, Renji."

Surprised, Renji looked down at his side. Which was drenched with blood and made his uniform stick to his side. "Goddammit…" He muttered.

Ikkaku snorted. "Get that idiot to the 4th, huh?" He waved a hand, walking off. "Come get me when you get back on full duty. Tattoo freak."

"You're fucking dead, baldy!"

Wandering aimlessly for a good half hour to lose any potential tailers, Ikkaku made a sharp turn and slipped over the far wall of the 11th division. He trotted over to one of the gates, flashed the keeper a grin (nice guy, took his bribes in the cheap rice candies Ikkaku would bring back from Rukongai) and hightailed it for a forest he knew by heart.

It wasn't much by normal forest standards. It had grass, flowers, bushes and trees and maybe the occasional animal. Those were, pretty much, the only way you could label it as a forest. It was thin and the plants a little sickly, but it was where Ikkaku had always gone to think or stew as a kid. It was the easiest place for him to sit and commune with Hozukimaru.

"Well?" The demon asked. Ikkaku was already jumping from pole to pole, energetically fighting some unseen enemy. "What is it this time?"

"That Renji." The shinigami grunted. His footing was getting more and more sure, barely even having to look before he moved. "He's gonna be a tough one."

Hozukimaru, of course, had been watching all the battles in the past two days. But still he asked, "Why do you say that?"

Ikkaku stopped, not the least bit short of breath. "First off, there's his Zanpakuto. Multi-segmented whip. Che. Takes away my advantage of reach. It can still form into a sword so I'm at a disadvantage getting in close, too." He crouched down, cupping his chin in thought. "I'll bet I'm faster than him, but he could probably still keep up with me. He's a bit weak on the left side, though. He knows this so when a quick attack comes in on the left, he can barely get in a hasty block but tends to leave the right open. Hmmm…"

Hozukimaru delicately bit his pipe and grinned to himself. All these years and the boy was finally starting to think on his own. He was still largely dependent on his sword's advice, but was finally gaining the insight Hozukimaru was trying to drill into him.

He still has a long, long way before he could even think about reaching Ban Kai, Hozukimaru thought, but he'll be hard pressed to find a decent opponent when he does.

"Well?" He asked. "You seem to have something going on in you head over there, boy."

In response, Ikkaku turned to the demon with a curious expression. "Ne, Hozukimaru. How easy is it for you to learn a new trick?"

Because of the blood loss it was two days until Renji was declared fit for more ass kicking. In an attempt to show good will, Ikkaku had offered to retrieve their current 4th seat. Yumichika came along in order to prevent both from being reinstated into the medical division.

Along the way back, Ikkaku felt the need to explain to Renji how he needed to get over trying to be some bad-ass, hot tempered kid. "Youth is good, don't get me wrong." He said importantly. "But being too rash just gets ya in over your head. Ya gotta learn to back off. That's where time and experience comes in. You need to emulate your elders."

Renji sneered. "The hell you talkin' about? You're the one that hit some guy in the head with a bottle last weekend for proving you cheated at cards."

Snarling, Ikkaku replied, "He was bein' a dick. He fuckin' deserved it."

"Feh! You're the one that was swipin' his drink because you went broke during the third hand!"

Yumichika clapped his hands, trying to get both of the hotheads' attention. "Oh, guess what I heard! The new 12th division vice-captain is finally getting official initiated today!"

"Yeah? So what?" Renji asked. "That's got nothin' to do with us."

Ikkaku snorted in agreement. "Yeah. Gonna suck for 'em havin' to…deal….wiiii…."

Traffic ahead of them had hastily parted for no small reason. Not only was Kurotsuchi-taichou walking down the way, but behind him strode a servile Nemu wearing an adjutant's shield. And a haori.

That… That had to be breaking someone's laws somewhere. No vice-captain should be showing that much skin and look so good doing it. An obi cinched her waist tight and the haori came barely mid thigh. Watching them pass, Ikkaku forgot how to breath.

"Damn…" Renji muttered from over his shoulder. "I'd totally tap that."

It was a gut reaction that had him planting his elbow in Renji's nose.

"Ah fuck! FUCK!" Renji bent over, clutching his nose.

Ikkaku hoisted him up by the front of his uniform. "What the fuck!" He shouted. "How 'bout some fuckin' respect here?"

Renji growled between his fingers. "What the fuck is your problem? Get offa me!" He shoved the other man away.

Coming to the rescue, yet again, Yumichika pulled the two apart. "Calm down, Renji." He said, placing both hands on the newcomer's shoulders. "Ikkaku just gets a little defensive over his girlfriend."

Ikkaku flushed. "She's not my girlfriend!"

"Fortunately not. He's just got a pitifully obvious crush on her."

"I DON'T LIKE HER!"

And the trio was suddenly hyper aware of an all-encompassing silence around them. Ikkaku's flush flared up, realizing that everyone was staring at him. Even Kurotsuchi stopped to glare over his shoulder. Nemu didn't.

"Uh," he stammered, "I mean… I don't…" Muscles in his jaw twitching, he did the first thing that came to his mind.

He turned and ran.

"Ikkaku!" Yumichika grabbed a handful of Renji's sleeve. "Ikkaku! Wait up!"

Mayuri's eyes slid from the retreating 11th division members to the down turned face of his daughter. "See, Nemu?" His voice was almost kind if not for the sadistic joy underneath it. "He's already turned his back on you. I told you things like 'kindness' and 'friendship' were baseless lies."

"Yes, Mayuri-sama."

"Saa." He moved forward again. "We shouldn't be late."

Hands tightening on the hem of her uniform, Nemu followed quietly.

They didn't catch up to him until they were in the 11th division's main quad. Ikkaku was doubled over from the run, leaning heavily on his sword. Yumichika and Renji puffed heavily, trying to support each other.

Under the 3rd seat's panting, they thought they heard him mumbled 'stupid, stupid, stupid,' like some self-depreciating mantra.

"Oi, oi." Renji stood shakily. "Ikka-"

It was only by Yumichika yanking him back did Renji prevent getting a blade rammed through his throat. "WHOA! Hold up!" The sheath clipped him in the chin, Renji stumbled, fell against Yumichika and both crashed onto the ground.

"Get up." Ikkaku commanded. "You want my spot? GET. UP."

"For the love of- WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?" Renji shouted.

"You can fight, can't you?" Came the thin reply. "I'm not playin' with you here." Ikkaku slammed his sword and sheath together. "Grow! Hozukimaru!" He held the spear with the point elevated. Renji saw it in his eyes. He needed a fight. A GOOD fight. A fight where he could really let loose and blow some steam and stop beating the crap out of himself.

Renji snorted, getting on his feet and drawing his own weapon. "Howl! Zabimaru!" He knew that look intimately. Almost every day since he cut the last tie to his own childhood. And, just like Ikkaku, he couldn't afford to play around either.

"Shouldn't we wait until we have the required amount of people to be witnesses?" Renji asked idly.

"They'll come." Came the reply as Ikkaku shifted his grip slightly. "They can't resist a show."

A thin grin answered that. "Well, I'll try not to beat you in one hit, then."

"Save your charity for someone that needs it." Ikkaku shot forward, faster than Renji expected, already working on the weak left side. Renji swung at head height, Zabimaru's spines were caught when the spear came up for a block.

He jerked the sword back, attempting to pull Hozukimaru from Ikkaku's grip but the other man took advantage of the pull, almost pushing Renji off his feet. And when he found his balance again, Ikkaku came in with a head butt. At the same moment Renji's foot connected to his gut.

Renji stumbled back, cursing and cradling his abused nose while Ikkaku nearly went on one knee, coughing and trying to suck in air. "Che!" Renji wiped his face with a sleeve. That was stupid, letting him get that close. He'd seen Ikkaku grapple before, wrestled around with him on a couple occasions himself. He fought like a wild cat, anything goes.

Ikkaku, however, smirked. Renji didn't know how he fought armed and most likely never fought anyone with a pole arm before. But Ikkaku had the advantage of watching Renji's movements, unarmed, with a sword and with a whip. On top of that, he had gone up against a few Hollows with whip-like appendages. Age, he thought dryly, really was weighty factor in a fight.

Renji drew back his arm and launched Zabimaru ahead, grinning wickedly when Ikkaku jumped. Flicking his wrist, Zabimaru whistled through the air and Ikkaku could only twist around and block it. The force sent him to the ground in a heap. He rolled onto his feet, flipping back as Zabimaru tore up the ground around him.

Giving Ikkaku space wasn't a good idea either, Renji realized. He was fast, could switch directions in a blink. Had all the innate agility a scrawny alley brat did, weak from hunger but strong in heart. He hadn't seen someone flip around so much since Rukia.

"Che! Fuckin' monkey!" Renji taunted. "Stand still and fight already!"

Ikkaku grinned right back. "Oh, you wouldn't want that! I got a trick I made just for you. You wouldn't want me to use it just yet!"

Besides, he still had too much energy to burn. Renji's ability gave him a dozen angles of attack, the speed and skill he used kept Ikkaku focused. But, he thought, blocking another attack and letting the power behind the blow roll him out of the way of the following strike, the ability would also be Renji's downfall. Whenever using Zabimaru as a whip, Renji himself didn't move too much. Hardly a heavy weight on his feet, he was just too secure with the idea of being able to keep his opponents at bay.

He sure as hell was gonna enjoy the look on that red haired bastard's face when he got the drop on him. Literally.

For the past 80 some-odd years Ikkaku trained in this quad. He knew every angle of the walls, the loose tiles on the roofs, each crack on the ground. The quad was a more familiar place than his own room. Ikkaku leapt straight at Renji, bracing Hozukimaru along his right side, absorbing the force of the whip. The whiplash took him at the near wall and he let momentum twist him around, planted his feet against the wall and transferred all that force right back at its origin.

"Wha-" Renji's reaction time took him out of the way of a flying spearhead. Ikkaku touched down right behind him, already going in for another strike by the time Renji had half way turned, Zabimaru still spread out. He took the blow on the jagged guard, Zabimaru shaking and jumbling up- almost knotting itself through Renji's panicked swings.

Hozukimaru spun, the butt jabbing at Renji's left side again, only to be blocked by the hilt. Ikkaku's smirk widened dangerously.

"Oraoraoraoraora!" He cackled, prodding at the weak side with a rapid attack, almost toying with the other shinigami. Renji winced, refusing to give ground and his knuckles were bleeding thickly. Desperate, he took a hit in the shoulder, throwing his arm out as if to punch Ikkaku's head with the hilt. He fell out of range of the attack, giving Renji enough space to reform his sword.

"YA AIN'T GOT ME YET!" He snarled, arching the sword at Ikkaku's open chest.

"That's what you think. Split! Hozukimaru!"

Zabimaru rocked to a halt, tangled in wood and chains. The tip of the spear pressed lightly into Renji's chest, right above his heart.

"Hey, hey, lookit that!" Ikkaku grinned. "Guess I won!"

Renji snarled, grip shaking tightly around his Zanpakuto. But he lowered the sword resentfully.

"Aw, don't be like that." The grin became a little more playful. "C'mon, you just gonna give up like that? Maa, guess it can't be helped, huh? I mean, that's to be expected, goin' up against me after all. Here, I might forgive your pretentiousness if you apologize." He prodded at Renji's chest lightly. "Yeah, that's it. Just say, 'I'm sorry for thinkin' I could take you on, O powerful and unbeatable Madarame-sama'. C'mon, say it. C'mon, c'mon, c'mon."

Renji, who had been scowling darker and darker all the while, pushed Hozukimaru from his chest and tackled Ikkaku to the ground. A fair percent of the gathered 11th sagged unhappily and the movement of currency took place en masse. Zaraki, who had the uncanny ability of showing up to a good fight in his division, huffed impatiently at the lack of blood.

"Oi, Yumi." He told the 5th seat. "When they're done beatin' the crap outta each other, take 'em both to the 4th division again."

"Yes sir." Came the reply. He shook his head and found a spot by the wall to watch the brawl. "These two are going to kill each other, I swear."

These days new rules were set in the 12th division. The most emphasized was that no member of the 11th division were to enter the gates without proof of official business. Another, aimed specifically at Nemu, denied her leaving the division without Mayuri, unless on official business.

These days Nemu would spend in the background, standing quietly in the most unobtrusive spot until her father called for her. And when he would dismiss her late at night, she would sometimes stand outside her room and look at the far, far wall that divided her from the 11th division.

These days Nemu didn't talk much and she followed every word that came from Mayuri as if they were the only things she understood. But that didn't keep her from thinking how much she missed the ability to smile.