One Month Later

Lucas leaned against the edged of the doorway. He watched Peyton as she sat solemnly in the rocking chair that was still centered in the baby's room. She had done that everyday for the past week. She just sat there and rocked back and forth looking out the window. Everyone had started to lose hope, even Brooke, and that worried them all. Peyton only continued to shut down as time went on, she wouldn't even answer simple questions anymore. She was always just in a daze, and Lucas too was now starting to feel the pain. He had tried so hard to be strong for Peyton but he wasn't sure if he could do it anymore. The two of them would spend hours each day in the same position they were in at that very moment, Peyton in the chair and Lucas watching her. Watching her only made him remember.

Lucas would look around the room and drift off. He would get images of his son watching the mobile from his crib. He thought about holding his son and rocking him to sleep. He would even think about when he was older and he could sit on the floor and they would play blocks together or roll a ball around the room. But Luke would always snap back to reality and realize that he wouldn't be able to do those things. He would always drift off again though as he watched Peyton and he would imagine her sitting in the same position she was in holding their child and rocking him to sleep. He could see the gentle curve of her lips as she looked down in adoration and hummed while she cradled their son. It was when he snapped out of this day dream that the tears would start to fall. They would always come subtly at first but as he continued to watch her delicate figure they would gradually fall faster, but neither of them ever made a sound. He would eventually turn away and leave her because although he didn't think it was possible, his heart would begin to once again shatter.

Brooke's words from a month ago had remained in his head. They always lingered over him now, like a black cloud. She had told him that he had never known the real Peyton Sawyer, and that she regretted that. Two weeks ago the brunette had given him an old photo album of her and Peyton when they were kids. He hadn't been able to look at it until last night. Last night he had run his fingers over the old binding of the leather album. As he turned the pages he smiled to himself. He laughed as he looked over pictures of the two best friends. There were images of them on an old tire swing; Peyton was standing on the top, holding onto the thick rope, looking down with a huge grin on her face, while Brooke was sitting inside the tire wearing an equally large grin as she looked up at Peyton. Lucas laughed as he eyed a picture of the two girls with their arms swung over the other necks and their head leaning against each other's. Lucas made himself stop on that picture, because of the blonde's smile. It was just as captivating as the smile she wore now, or used to. But there was still something different about it, something that he couldn't place. It was as he got ready to turn the page he realized what it was. He flipped back through all the pictures in the front of the album and he noticed the same thing. Her eyes held a glow when she smiled, but even in one of the pictures of her yelling at Brooke with her hands on her hip, her eyes still glowed. It was missing in all the recent pictures of her. He had looked at one of the pictures of her and Brooke that was sitting on the mantle, it was taking during high school and it was just like the picture in the album with their arms around each other, with the exception of their cheerleading uniforms. There was another difference though that Lucas had never noticed before, her eyes, they were sad. Her entire face glowed because of her angelic smile, but her eyes held the story of a hurt little girl.

Lucas had taken one last look at the picture in the album and then closed it then. He hadn't noticed it until he felt the moisture on his hand but he was crying. Now Lucas was standing in the doorway of his son's room, once again crying. He did something he hadn't done since that night in the hospital, since his son…died, he walked into the room. He walked over to Peyton and kneeled in front of her. He laid a hand gently on her leg but she didn't acknowledge him, she merely continued to look straight ahead.

"Peyton" he spoke he name gently, almost as if saying it too loud would push her away. He waited and she did as he expected, nothing. She sat there as if he wasn't there, like he hadn't spoken to her. He looked up at her, into her hazel eyes. He loved those eyes, there was just something bout them that always held him captive. He could get lost in her eyes, and he often did, but not this time. Her eyes weren't the same, they seemed cold almost. There as no happiness in them, but there wasn't sadness either. There wasn't anything there, her eyes told no story, it was as if she was just there. She really was like a life size porcelain doll. Her skin was pale and ghostly, but she had these flushed, rosy cheeks. The last detail however was her eyes, she had the most gorgeous eyes he had ever seen but they held nothing, they were lifeless, they made her seem lifeless.

Lucas bowed his head and stood up. He gave one last look at Peyton and then bent down and kissed her forehead lightly. He could feel the heat from her skin but he had finally gotten used to it. She had gained the red tint to her cheek three weeks ago when she started getting erratic fevers, but they always went away within minutes. Brooke had told them not to worry about it, she couldn't remember what the doctor had told her caused the fevers but she did remember that he said they were nothing to be worried about unless they stayed for more than an hour an they never did.

The heartbroken blonde made his way down the hall to go downstairs but he stopped when he gazed into Peyton's room. He looked at a picture of them, he had his arms wrapped around her waist and her head was leaning back against his shoulder. Her smile was different from the one when she was with was with Brooke in their uniforms, it was…happier, more real. He remembered when Brooke snapped that picture. It was a couple of days after she and Peyton patched things up and they had all gone over to the park. Peyton had been talking to Haley and he had gone over to them and picked the blonde up and spun her around in the air. They were all laughing as Peyton screamed for him to put her down. Brooke had also gotten a picture of that but he had that one on his desk at home. When he put her down she tried to run away from him but he flung his arm around her waist and pulled her into him. He wrapped both arms around her waist and kissed her golden curls. He told her that he loved her and she returned the words before craning her neck to kiss his lips gently, Brooke had also taken a picture of that but she refused to let them have, they had never even seen it. After they broke the kiss Peyton had leaned her head back onto his shoulder and Brooke had said 'hey lovebirds' to get their attention and then snapped the picture.

Peyton had gotten the picture blown up and framed the day Brooke gave it to here, and now Lucas held it in his hand, smiling as he looked down on it. But his smile faded slightly and became forced as he noticed something, her eyes. They were sad and although he had never noticed it before he saw it clearly now. As wide as the curly blonde's smile was and as much as her face glowed, she wasn't happy. Her smile was real and she was happy at that moment but not in general, not with her life. Luca put the picture down, upset that he wouldn't be bale to look at the picture the same anymore. He got ready to leave the room but stopped when he caught sight of another picture. Haley had taken this one and it was 4 months into Peyton pregnancy. She was starting to show and she was also starting to experience the side effects. Lucas laughed as he remembered how Peyton was in her third and fourth months, she was basically a basket case because she couldn't control her emotions.

Flashback

Lucas opened the front door to Peyton's house and closed it soundly behind him. Haley and Nathan were waiting in the car because they had plans to go out for dinner and Brooke and Charlie were going to meet them at the restaurant. Lucas got ready to go upstairs when he heard something. He stopped on the bottom step and tried to figure out what the sound was and where it was coming from. He listened harder and realized it was coming from upstairs. Freight immediately took over him as he climbed the steps two at a time.

"Peyton…" he called out as he reached the top, but there was no response, but the noise got louder as he walked down the hall. He stopped in front of Peyton's room and saw her sitting on her bed wiping her eyes. Lucas quickly made his way over to her and kneeled down on the floor. He looked around and saw all her clothes thrown around the room, he looked at the slightly shaking girl in front of him and noticed that she was in a pair of his cotton flannels and his t-shirt. He cupped her tear-stained face with his hands and kissed her lightly. "What's wrong?" he asked, the concern evident in his strained voice.

"None of my clothes fit" she said as her eyebrows furrowed and more tears poured from her eyes. Lucas couldn't help but smile at her reason or distress. "Its not funny, I have nothing to wear Luke."

"Peyton you have to have something in here and if you don't you can wear my clothes that you have on now, I could care less Peyt…as long as I get to spend time with you. Its not a big deal." Lucas smiled up at the blonde and kissed her forehead. He felt her body shudder as he pulled away and when he looked down he noticed the tears falling faster form her already red eyes. "Peyton…" He questioned in confusion.

"I know it's not a big deal and I don't know why I started crying in the first place. I went to look for something to ware and everything was too small and it was just so frustrating. I tried to keep looking but there was nothing and I just didn't wanna look anymore and then is at down and I looked around the room and everything was so scattered and I don't know…I hate this." Peyton said with a defeated look on her face. Lucas sat next to her on the bed and pulled her closer to him and leaned her head on his shoulder. Before he knew it her entire body was shaking and she was crying harder then before.

"Peyt…what is it?" Lucas wasn't sure what to do, he had never seen Peyton like this, he had never seen anyone like this, and he never expected to see Peyton like this. He was beginning to think that something else was going on, that there was something really wrong.

"I can't stop crying. I try to stop and I just keep going and the tears keep coming I just can't stop. Lucas I can't do this." Peyton looked even more defeated as the tears continued to pour form her eyes.

"Yes you can, and I'm here to help you." Lucas took his thumbs and wiped the tears from her face before standing up and pulling her into a tight hug. "I love you Peyton and I know you can do this, I'm not gunna make you do it alone though." He pulled back and kissed her forehead gently.

"I know, I love you too Luke" She said as she leaned up and kissed his lips.

"You better" He said before giving the infamous Scott smirk. Peyton laughed a little and then gave a small smiled before biting her lip to try and stop form crying anymore. "Was that a smile?" Lucas asked in mock shock causing the other blonde to smile once again but wider this time. She watched as Lucas dropped his knees and lifted the shirt over her growing stomach. He planted a gentle kiss on her bare skin, and Peyton couldn't' help but smile as she watched the mesmerized look that cascaded over Lucas's face. "I love you too little one, but why are you causing mommy so much trouble? That's not very nice is it?" Lucas shook his head slightly and repeated 'no it's not' in a baby voice a couple of times. Peyton threw her head back and laughed. The blondes started at the door as they heard someone else laughing and saw a flash.

"How cute" Nathan smiled as he stood in the doorway. Haley was wearing her own smiling as she held the digital camera in her hands. Lucas rolled his eyes and went back to talking to the baby. He kissed Peyton's stomach and Haley caught that moment as well.

End Flashback

Lucas smiled at the memory as he held the framed photo in his hands, Peyton had blown that one up too, it was everyone's favorite picture of the couple. Lucas noticed the same thing he had noticed in all the pictures of her since last night, her eyes. But unlike the other photo's in the house, her eyes weren't sad, she looked like she did in the pictures from the album. Lucas now knew why Brooke and Peyton were so close when she was pregnant, Brooke had gotten her best friends back, and Peyton had found herself again, she was happy, truly happy. Peyton still had tears streaming form her eyes in the picture but she held a glow about her that even the camera picked up. Luke looked at himself in the picture and saw that he too looked happier then usual and he knew that he was. There was nothing he wanted more than to hold and play with his child, his son, but he never got the chance.

"Lucas, I know you guys are here you're always here…" Lucas heard Haley's voice as she climbed the stairs. "I brought you guys some food since you refuse to leave the house…" Lucas still just continued to look at the picture, getting lost in his thoughts, drowning in them.

Haley continued to climb the stairs. She peeked into the rooms as she walked down the hall as she heard Nathan start to climb the steps. Haley looked into Peyton's room and stopped when she saw Lucas. She could see that he was looking at something but she couldn't tell what. "Luke" she called again as she stepped further into the room, placing the bag of food down on the floor.

Lucas turned around and looked at Haley with tears in his eyes. He looked down at the picture in his hand again. He gripped the frame so tight that his knuckles were turning white. Lucas feared that if he let the picture go he would lose the memories, he would forget what it was to be happy, he would forget his son. He looked up at Haley again who was now close enough to see the picture and already knew what was going through his head. The petite girl reached out her hand to touch her best friends shoulder but her pulled away and closed his eyes and turned back around. Haley now had tears in her own eyes and she watched the blonde try to fight the torment growing inside of him.

Lucas opened his eyes and looked at the picture. That was his family, his perfect family that he would treasure for all his life. His family was gone now though and what was left of it was quickly fading. The happy, perfect people in that picture weren't there any more. Now there wasn't anything left to them, they were all broken. Lucas felt the first tear find its way over the brim of his eyes and watched as it hit the glass protecting his family. The blonde turned around to face a quietly crying Haley.

"Hales" his voice was trembling and his shoulder began to shake as he fell to the floor. He let the tears fall as Haley kneeled on the floor and wrapped her arms around him. Lucas pulled the picture to his chest, not holding it with both hands, and rocked back and forth and the auburn haired girl's small arms.

"It's okay Luke…I'm here" She said quietly in an attempt to comfort him, but she knew it wouldn't help. Nathan stood in the doorway watching the scene. Haley looked up and saw as a single tear slip from his blue eyes. Haley leaned here head into Luke's neck and cried lightly as she held her best friend and did the best she could to help him.

"Why is he crying?" Nathan turned as he heard the familiar but quiet and curious voice behind him. He looked in to the hazel eyes and she brought herself to stand next to him. She looked at Luke and then looked up at Nathan as she waited for him to answer.

"He miss his…" Nathan had turned to look at Luke when he spoke but stopped and looked back at his side. "Peyton…did you just ask me something?" He looked down at her in disbelief she looked at him in curiosity. She wanted to know what was going on…she felt curious. Nathan looked into her eyes and saw something he hadn't seen in a long time…in her eyes he saw a sense of longing. Nathan pulled his ex into his side and she laid her head by his shoulder. Nathan didn't know what to do as he watched the confused face on the girl he was holding, so he didn't do anything. He followed everyone else in the room and watched as Lucas cried. The all watched as the blonde cried for his son.