Part Three: The Force…
Erik, after having experienced the foulest thin in his life, made his way towards a brightly lit placed called Wal-Mart. Surely nothing worse could happen to him. Of course, there was always Phan # 4 in our story… Kira.
Now, Kira, having been alerted by her trusty Walkie-talkie that the Phantom was coming this way, was totally prepared when he entered the sliding doors.
"Welcome to Wal-Mart, my name is Kira, can I help you?" She had had to practice that over and over again, because what she wanted to say went something like this, 'Welcome to Wal-Mart, I have evil plans against you, I'm your number one Phan, can I have your mask?'. That simply wouldn't do for the undercover situation that she was in.
Erik, still looking slightly green, nodded graciously, and let the red headed girl lead him to a rather comfy contraption that she called a Lacey Boy. He could only imagine that the fop had invented it… Lace indeed.
"Now you wait right here, and I'll go and fetch you something to make that stomach settle…" and, with one last look, away she whisked.
People who walked by started, while two girls, rather familiar looking walked past.
"Sandra, Kira's gonna get them!"
"Shush Amanda, lets go hide in the electronics and watch."
However, Erik was too out of it, relaxed in his lacey boy to pay them any attention.
"Back!" The attendant Kira said, her hazel eyes flashing brightly. She handed him a blue box, and he looked past her to see a cart filled with three more boxes of something…
He looked suspiciously at the box, and then, curiously peeking, opened it. "Some mores?" He arched the eyebrow not covered by the mask.
"They'll make EVERYTHING better dear, just eat them." Kira nodded in confirmation. He took the blue package, and with one last look at Kira, put the blue bag into his mouth and bit down.
A series of giggles sounded from all around him, and he looked up suspiciously while Kira took the bitten package from him. Little hearts danced in her eyes, and she pocketed it, then pulled out another from the box.
"Don't eat the wrapper. You open it, and then eat the contents." She showed him where the plastic paper met, and then proceeded to open it for him while he stared. A smell wafted up to him, making his stomach roll in hunger. He took the offered package, and slid out on of the little… what were they?
"S'more pop tarts." Kira explained and he nodded, taking one of the tarts delicately. He placed the corner in his mouth and bit into it. His eyes flew wide, and he placed his hand at the back of the tart, cramming the complete pastry into his mouth in one deft motion.
Kira laughed evilly, handing him a jar of milk while he reach for the pastry's twin.
Three Hours Later
Erik was running around Wal-Mart, though, running wasn't the word. He was on something, Kira had told him it was a scooter, running from the men who were chasing him while shouting something about not driving in the store, and owing them for precisely three boxes of poptarts.
Now, for people who aren't familiar with boxing, inside each box were exactly 36 smaller boxes, containing 4 packages, which held 2 tarts each. Now, shall we multiply?
3 boxes containing 36 smaller boxes equals 108 small boxes. IN those 108 small boxes were 4 wrapped packages, which equaled 432 wrapped packages. Now, inside each wrapped package were 2 poptarts. IN total, over a process of 3 hours, Eri k had consumed a total of 864 tarts. Of course, minus the pack that Kira had taken, so only 862. It's not humanly possible!
Don't tell me that, tell that to the scootering Phantom.
Speaking of him, the store managers were trying to catch him.
"Come back here!" the fattest man shouted, waddling up and down the aisles after the speeding Phantom.
"You'll never catch me you old fat…" Erik broke into giggles, jumping off the scooter just in time to let it run into a large cage of bouncy balls, which in turned, crashed down upon the fat mans head.
"Quick!" Kira shouted.
"This way!" Amanda and Sandra and the girl from the library shouted. They lead him over towards the clothes department.
XXXxxxXXX
Two managers ran by the clothes, looking for the rampaging, tart stealing, crazy man in a mask. However, all they saw were displays. One was a girl with green eyes (Amanda) and another (Sandra) holding two long toy sabers, posed in fighting stance. The first had on black robes, and her saber was red. The other was garbed in brown, and had a blue saber.
"Star Wars movie coming out." One said to the other, and they went on. The next display was a girl sitting down with a large hat over her face so that you couldn't make out her featured, and a copy of 'The Phantom of the Opera' by Gaston Leroux in her hands.
"Phantom came out May 3rd." The other manager said, and they continued on.
They last display was the one that got them, however.
There was two women, though one seemed awfully masculine for it. The red head was smiling prettily , and had on a huge pair of sunglasses, while the other had yet another large hat covering her face. The manager, how curious as to what lay under the hat, walked up and tugged it off to reveal… The crazy, tart stealing, scooter riding, mask wearing maniac!
Erik, realizing that he had been discovered, took the hat from the mans hand, pulled it over his face, and hiking up his SKIRT, ran for his life, while the managers ran after him.
"RUN ERIK!" Kira shouted, while he laughed like Michael Crawford (Grins) and ran. Amanda and Sandra ran forward, and unclipped their spare sabers, from their belts. They threw one to Kira and one to Erik. Kira grabbed up the blue one, and Erik the red. The fourth female stood and played Yoda.
"Fighting they are. Phantom he is. S'mores hyperize… FIGHT!" and in a quick motion, Erik and Kira snapped the plastic sticks out of the holders and looked death at the men standing in the middle of the three crazy Phan girls and one Phantom who just happened to be high at the moment. Then, Erik drifted to Amanda's side, and Kira went to Sandra…
Actions were to quick to write down, however, the dialogue went as follows.
ERIK: Join me, or die!
MANAGER1: Sir, put the toy down!
AMANDA: Now, Sandy-wan-ka-no-bee! Join us!
SANDY-WAN: Never!
KIRA: We'll never join you Darth Amanda and Fa-Air-Ma-Gar-Darth-Erik (lol, Kira… that's so funny!)
FA-AIR-MA-GAR-DARTH-ERIK: Join us or fall forever!
SANDY-WAN and PRINCESS-KIRA: NEVER!
DARTH AMANDA: Then DIE!
A loud series of screams-
FA-AIR-MA-GAR-DARTH-ERIK: My arm, they'be taken my arm!
Darth Amanda: NOOO!
another series of screams-
SANDY-WAN: Go on without my!
DARTH AMANDA and FA-AIR-MA-GAR-DARTH-ERIK: HAHAHAH! MUAHAHAHAH!
PRINCESS KIRA: I'll kill you! Growlish!
FA-AIR-MA-GAR-DARTH-ERIK: I'm not your father Princess Kira!
PRINCESS KIRA: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO –takes breath- OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
XXXxxxXXX
Now, confusing as that was, I'll try to explain. While Amanda, Kira, Sandra, and Erik hit each other with sticks like idiots, Yoda came up and bashed the managers over the heads and knocked them out.
"Die, die, die!" Erik and Amanda shouted, whacking Kira and Sandra on the heads, until the smiled, fell down, and made choking sounds while twitching, until they finally stopped, sticking their tongues out (SAW people, SAW)
After the performance, all stood, bowed to no one, and ran while another set of managers came.
Outside, Erik was telling the girls of his 'adventure', from then, all the way to, "I got attacked by a talking toilet. Then I went to a library and I read this awful story, then ate all these tarts and now…" He smiled crazily… "Erik feels gooooooooooooooooood."
All four girls nodded, leading Erik towards the mall, where the next evil plan would begin. Operation 'GET SOME MORE' had been a success. Next was Operation 'MOVIES', where they could meet with their friend Kristi.