Love Through Flame and Gunfire
Chapter 3: Visits
Roy was increasingly haggard over the course of the next month; Visits from Riza had been stopped completely, Jean's visits only once a week, his other subordinates limited to once every two weeks. Jean's visits were particularly supportive, them being the only two out of the terrible threesome of their childhood days to be alive. Soon, Roy thought darkly, sadly, Jean would be the only one left. He would be leaving one of his closest friends all alone.
Jean's visits allowed Roy to forget where he was, if only for a little while. It was a mercy and a curse all in one. He was desperate, no, more than desperate, to escape from his dirty little hovel, but when he was landed back in the real world, and he realized where he was after Jean left, it was enough to make a grown man cry. And it did.
Even his parents visits were limited, his mother's more than his father's. Roy thought that maybe his mother just couldn't take the sight of him like this, not that he blamed her. It was quite overwhelming, even for his father. His father would visit for hours at a time, just to sit with him or talk, but this time, Roy hada burning question.
"What favor did Jackory Hawkeye owe you?" he asked.
His father looked up at him sharply, his dark eyes locking with his. "Jackory Hawkeye owes me no favor. If there is any favor, I have one to him that I can never hope to repay."
"Then what is it?" Roy queried.
"...I... it was during the early days of both our military careers, Jack and I were on a search and stealth operation. We were looking for a lost operative, your mother." Roy was quiet.
"You were looking for Mom?"
His father nodded slowly. "Yes. I didn't know that Jack had been deployed for the same mission, I had no idea. I was sent by myself, Jack was sent with the woman who later became his wife. I was walking along, trying to keep hidden, and I saw him carrying her. She was bound and gagged, and I didn't know what I was thinking...
"I saw the uniform, but I still pulled the trigger... and I hit him."
"Where?" Roy breathed.
"In his hand... I was the one that lamed him in his firing hand for life... I don't know why, I saw the uniform, but I just saw him, and I..." he looked down at his hands. "I think it was jealousy that pulled the trigger, I just didn't think."
"Were you court martialed?"
"I was. It was deemed accidental and I was pardoned, but Jackory was dismissed from the military; we lost one of the best marksmen at that moment. He couldn't fire a gun anymore, what use was he? We've had... a bit of a grudge against each other since then."
So that was it. That white-hot anger in Jackory Hawkeye's eyes that had been concealed in the blink of an eye, the anger that had made Roy shiver inside and feel like all the life was being sucked out of him, that he was small and insignificant, a bug about to be crushed. But then... why would he help now?
"I can never apologize for what I did to him. What good would it do?"
"But he can shoot with his left..."
"They didn't accept him, even when he shot bullseyes into exactly one hundred targets with one hundred bullets. It wasn't enough, he had to be able to use the other hand, and he couldn't. I destroyed his career as soon as the bullet left the gun."
"You're feeling guilty, then?"
"Yes. But then... you wouldn't have been born if they'd court-martialed me, so perhaps it's better for you, if not my consiensce, that I was not court-martialed."
"Is it better, Father? Look at me, I'll be dead in four months anyhow. Looking back, it's almost as if my life wasn't worth living."
"Don't say that, Son."
"But it isn't."
"I'm trying to find evidence that might help you."
"They wouldn't let it go to trial. You're a relative and therefore deemed unfit to testify for the accused," Roy intoned.
"... I know, but I have to try, Roy. Maes's father and I... are on rocky grounds, though we've been the best of friends for years. I guess my life is finally unraveling," he murmured, fingers rubbing his temples. His hair was streaked with white around his temples, Roy noted. The last time he had seen his father, which had been roughly two months before at the hearing, there had not been any white.
"Along with mine," Roy muttered. "Even Mr.Hughes believes I did it?"
"The evidence is against you. As your parents, it's the expected reaction from the public to stand with you, to believe you didn't do it. There are very few other than family and trusted friends that believe you didn't do it."
"How's Mom?" Roy asked quietly.
"She's..." his father hesitated. "She's getting sicker every single day... I don't know what's happening..."
"It's because of me," Roy choked out. "She's dying because she grieving already, grieving that I'll be dead! She's dying because of me! God, I am truly a murderer!"
His father stood by the cell, hands clenched on the bars. "Stop that, Roy! You're a Mustang, you're a grown man, now get up, hold your head high, and act like one for God's sake!"
"There is no God, Father, I don't believe in that anymore. Not now, not now. I stopped after I killed all those people in Ishbal, all those women and children, defenseless, all of them, I stopped after Maes died, and I've definitely stopped now that they've convicted me for murdering my best friend. If there's anything I can rely on..." he raised his hands and stood up slowly. "It's these two hands, and I will find a way out of this, even if I have to die to clear my own name!"
His father nodded. "That's my boy... but... there's one more thing you should believe in... you have to trust in and believe in us, your family and friends." There was a glint in his father's eyes. "I for one am not so willing to let my only son die for a murder he did not commit. No Mustang is going to be disgraced for the unjust conviction of a crime, and I'll make sure of that, even if I... have to team up with Jackory to do it."
Somehow, that didn't make him feel much better. Okay, maybe a little, but still.
"I wish I could see Riza, Jean."
Jean's cigarette slipped down in his mouth a little. "Ahhh, so you're finally admitting it, eh?"
Roy shot him a look. "Wish I had a window, too."
"Oh come on... Riza got Gracia's message... in the middle of the office. Just broke down, right there, and Fuery and I helped her get home. She hasn't come to work much since then, and we've even seen her old man hanging around too. Talking to your old man, which certainly isn't something you see every day. Looked like a heated discussion, but it didn't come to blows, so I suppose that's good."
Roy nodded distractedly. Riza had broken down? It was worse than he had been expecting.
"How is she?" he asked.
"Well... she's okay, I think, but like I said, we haven't seen her for a while."
Roy hmmed and nodded, and Jean looked at him hesitantly.
"Have you... uh... done anything with her?"
Roy's head came up quickly. "What?"
"Have you... you know..."
Roy finally realized where Jean was heading and laughed. "No, no I haven't... I wish though, damn I wish..."
Jean breathed out slowly, releaved. "That's good... we were thinking... phew... but listen." He leaned on his elbows.
"I'm gonna bail you out too; I managed to get in on what the old men are doing, and it's a pretty good plan."
"When am I going to be bailed out then, Jean?"
"Next month, just wait one more month, and you're free."
Roy nodded and looked at the pocketwatch again. "I'll avenge Maes... and clear my name... to do those two things I'm willing to do... anything, anything at all. Then I'll be back with Riza... Tell her I'll be with her soon, Jean, very soon."