Chapter 2

Having watched "Napoleon Dynamite" with her friends till 12 am the previous night,

Joan had forgotten to set her alarm clock, which was why she was late to work the next morning.

In her rush, she had stubbed her toes twice and that razor burn on her leg wasn't feeling all that great right now either.

"You shouldn't be late for work Joan." She SO did not have time for this. Turning around, she saw it was Cute Boy God. Joan sighed, loudly. "What do you want?"

"First of all, not to be late to work. Secondly, I want you to let Adam back in." "I am."
'You know how I mean."

"I'm not ready." Joan replied.

It still hurt to remember what had happened that April day so long ago.

It had been their junior year of high school and they were about to celebrate their 1-year anniversary.
She had been in a mock trial about Jack and the bean stock and Adam had been Jack.

Joan had found out later in the day of the trial, that Adam had been cheating on her.

She had taken it out on him in the trial, making everyone else think she was going at Jack.

After the trial, he had told her everything.

She had broken up with him before she'd left the classroom.

"I can't yet." Joan said softly.

"You have to because you still love him. Don't look at me like that Joan. We both know you still do and so does Adam."

"What do you want me to do?"

"Call him."
"That's it?"
CBG shrugged and said, "You took sociology and physiology. You should be able to figure out what people mean."
"Yeah well, you made me take those classes!" Joan shot back.
"And you didn't enjoy them?"
"Okay, that's not fair." Joan protested.

CBG was giving her one of his "looks".

"Fine. Yes. I enjoyed them."

"Good. Now call him."
"And say what?"
God didn't answer.

He just turned around and gave her his backward wave that bugged her so much.

Joan fished around in her bag for her cell phone. Finding it, she pulled it out and looked at it and she dialed a number, but not Adam's.

On the west coast, Grace Polk was sitting at the computer, brainstorming.
She grumbled when her cell phone started to play "Celebrate" by Kool and the Gang.
She was nowhere near awake enough to talk to whoever was calling her.
She grabbed for it and looked at the caller I.D.
"De-de-de... The number you have dialed in not in service. Please click your number, and try again." Grace said, into the phone's speaker sounding just like the out of service phone person.

"That is so old." Joan said.
"Yeah, well. It's early and I'm cranky so tough st."
"You are cranky."
"Yeah, well.. What's up Girardi?"
"I need to talk to you."
Grace glanced at the computer's clock.
"God, it is too early for this." She grumbled under her breath.
"Did you know Adam's in New York?" Joan asked.
"No. Since when?"
"I don't know what day he got here, but I saw him yesterday. Anna and I saw him yesterday at his gallery showing."
"I haven't talked to him for a while, so I didn't know. What happened with you and Rove?"

"Nothing. We talked and had dinner. He walked me home and got to meet the 10 of them."
"Cool." Grace said.
"Yeah. I'm in over half his stuff. Did you know that?"
"Vaguely, I think."
Joan heard a beeping noise in her ear.

She looked at the screen and saw "GOD" as calling waiting.
"Sorry Grace, but I've got to go. I'll call you later."
"Okay. Tell Rove I said hi."
Joan agreed and pressed send.
"Yes?"
"Your not calling Adam."
"I wanted to talk to Grace."
"Call Adam."
"Fine." Joan said, as the line went dead.
She looked up Adam's number and she shook her head.
Couldn't for once God some what tell her what to do? No, no. She knew he'd never do that. He always had been and always would be unclear of what he really wanted from her. And sometimes, it really pissed her off.

She could hear it ringing as she bit at the skin on her thumb.

"Hello?" Adam said answered as he always had, slightly spacey.

"Hi." She replied, crossing her fingers that he would still know her voice on the phone

after all this time.
"Jane, hi. What's up?"
She let out a breath, relieved that he did remember.

"Not too much, what are you up to?" Joan asked.
"Nothing really. I have to go back to San Francisco to get some more of my art. It's going pretty fast."
"Wait. You're leaving?"
"I'll be back in a couple days." Adam replied.

"When?"
"Tomorrow. Unless people stop buying my stuff, I'll have to go home and grab more stuff every week."
"Wow, okay. Do you still have "Sewer Walking" by the way?"
She could tell Adam was smiling.
"Good, you saw it. It's not for sale and it never was. I just wanted to put it up, because it reminded me of you and even if you couldn't come, part of you would still be."

"Oh, Adam." Joan said, touched.

"What did you call about, by the way?"
"Oh nothing really. I should let you go. Busy and all. I'm late for work as it is."

"Oh okay. Do you want me to call later?" Adam asked.

Joan shrugged. "Sure."
"Okay." Adam said, agreeing.

They said good-bye and Joan put her phone back in her bag.

"Hi Joan."
Joan looked around and saw that it was Old Lady God.
"Was that all you wanted?"

"I wanted you to find some things out and you did. That's all I asked for."
"That was way too simple. Even for you. What else is there?" Joan asked.
"Nothing. Just expect to bump into some one that you haven't seen in a long time."
"Who?" Joan asked, curious now.

OLG didn't reply.

Like always, she just turned around and walked in the other direction, waving.

"Why Joan do you still ask questions? Why?" Joan muttered to herself.

Joan went up in the elevator to the 22nd floor.

She walked back to her office and set her stuff down.

She headed towards the coffee room.

Having gotten herself a Cinnabon cinnamon roll and a double mocha coffee, she went back to her office and sat down.

Joan had barely taken her first bite of her cinnamon roll, when a tall blonde woman appeared in her office doorway.

"I've already gabbed with Anna about it, but I want it straight from you. What happened with you and this Rove guy?"
"Not right now Tara."
"Why not?" Tara asked demandingly.

"I don't want to. I'm late as it is." Joan replied.
"Don't do this to me. Come on. Tell me!"
Joan put her cinnamon roll down.
"Okay, fine. Will you leave me alone so I can get to work afterwards?"
Yes." Tara replied, grinning.
"Okay I guess. Come on in."
Tara smiled as she pulled the door closed behind her.

About noon, there was a knock on her closed door.
"Come on in." Joan said, not looking up from her computer.

The doorknob turned and the door opened.

"Hey Jane."
Joan looked up at where the voice was coming from and smiled.

There stood Adam in jeans, a blue t-shirt and a gray hoodie.

She'd missed seeing him like this.

"Hi. What are you doing here?" Joan asked, as her smile grew bigger.

"I thought you might be interested in lunch." Adam replied.

"I would be. Where?"
"Maybe where Anna works, Gallery on the water or whatever it is. I've heard great things about it and I'd like to try it."
"Okay, sure. Let me save and then we can go."
Adam nodded and they walked out of her office a minute later.

Joan saw Tara looking at her from her desk and Joan mouthed, "I can too be friends with him" at her and Tara just smiled back.

"So where from here?" Adam asked, once they were outside.
"Um, this way. We'll ride the subway down."
Adam nodded and fallowed Joan down the crowded street.

"This place looks awesome." Adam said, opening the door.
"It is. Thank you." Joan said, going inside.

"Anna really works here?"
"Yup. I think it's like 2 and a 1/2 years now." Joan replied.

"Cool." Adam said.

"Hi and welcome to.. Joanie!" Anna said excited to see her.

"Hi!" Joan said grinning at her.

Anna smiled. "Hey Adam."

Adam smiled back. "Hi."

"Just the 2 of you?" Anna asked, eyeing them.

"Uh huh." Joan replied.

"What do you feel like? Table or booth for you?" Anna asked.
Adam looked at Joan. "Table?"

"Sure. Table Anna." Joan said looking back at Anna.
"Okay." Anna said and she showed them to a table by the window.

"What's good?" Adam asked.

"Well, what do you feel like?" Anna asked.
"I don't know." Adam replied.

Anna smiled. "What are you into? Seafood? Salad? Fish? Beef? Chicken? Burgers? Sandwiches?"
"Well what's not too heavy?"
"Sandwiches, Burgers or Salads."
"What of each do you recommend?" Adam asked.

"The Salmon Ceaser salad's really good. The Galleria burger's good. It has a patty, cheese, lettuce, tomato, onions, bacon and stuff on it. And sandwiches, um, the Turkey Melt's good. So is the Monte Cristo."
"What's the Salmon?" Adam asked.

"Blackened." Anna replied.

"I'll have that I guess. Now, if I don't like it, I can blame you, right?" Adam asked.

Anna laughed and replied "Sure."

"Cool." Adam said grinning at her.

"You can tell Ashlie your decision. I'll just get your drinks." Anna said.

Joan and Adam ordered their drinks and Anna left a minute later.

"This place is awesome Jane." Adam said.

"You think so?" Joan asked.

"Unchallenged. So, what you thinking of?"

"A burger. Probably a peppercorn Ranch one with a salad." Joan replied and Adam nodded.

"Could you get my order? I'll be right back." Adam said and this time it was Joan's turn to nod.

Ashlie the waitress came a moment later with their drinks and Joan ordered their food.

"That place was awesome!" Adam said as they left the restaurant an hour later.

"Yeah. Galleria's one of those places that has great lunches and dinners. You can go there with family, friends, on a date or whatever. It's a great restaurant." Joan replied.

"Do you have to get back to work now?" Adam asked

"Sort of. But, we can hang out for a while instead. I'll just take a long lunch." Joan replied.

"Unchallenged." Adam said.

All of a sudden Joan felt her fingers tingle and looking down, her heart started beating faster.

Adam had reached over for her hand and wrapped his fingers around hers.

Joan looked at him, her heart saying to never let go and her head was saying to shake them out immediately.

She looked up at him and silently begged him to let her fingers go. Adam caught her gaze and looked at her.

"What's wrong?" He asked when he saw her eyes filling up with tears.

"I can't do this."

"What?" Adam asked, concern now obvious in his voice.

"This, you holding my hand. Us, I just can't." Joan replied, rubbing at her eyes with her free hand.

"Why? Do you have a boyfriend or something?" Adam asked and Joan shook her head. "Then what?"

"I don't want to get hurt again, because it still does." Joan said, sniffling.

"Are you talking about junior year and the mock trial?" Adam asked and Joan nodded.

Adam pulled his hand away and said "Do you have any idea how much I still hate myself for doing that? It still hurts inside when I think about it."

"How can I trust you again Adam?" Joan asked, after a long moment of silence.

"You just have to. Jane, you have to know I'll never do that again. I lost so much more then doing what I did was ever worth. Believe me, I'll never hurt you again. I still love you Jane. I never stopped." Adam said.

"I know." Joan replied softly.

"Do you still love me?" Adam asked.

Joan looked up and after a moment said, "Yes."

"Please don't let the past ruin the chance for the future. Our future." Adam said.

"Adam, there can't be an "our future". There just can't be." Joan said, crying slightly again.

"You say that now, but what if we could be us again?"

Joan shook her head, sniffling. "No."

Adam bit down on his lip hard and closed his eyes. "I've got to go."

"Call me when you get back? Joan asked, looking up at him.

"Sure." Adam replied coldly, the hurt obvious in his eyes.

He turned his back to her and walked back towards the subway entrance.

Joan pulled her denim jacket closer around herself suddenly feeling very cold.

She slowly walked back to the subway entrance and headed back to work.

"It must have been a good lunch. It took long enough." Tara loudly said upon seeing Joan from her desk.

Joan didn't reply. Instead she went into her office and closed the door.

Her door was knocked on a minute later.

"Go away Tara."

"Come on, talk to me." Tara replied, opening the door.

"Oh my god. What happened?" Tara asked when she saw Joan's tear stained face.

"I just ruined everything with Adam." Joan replied, trying to blink back tears.

Sensing that Joan needed her, Tara sat down and closed the door.