"ATTENTION ALL PHANS! This is a Red Alert! Code Red! Level Red! The colour is RED! RED RED RED! Getting the picture yet! Red emergency! RED!

We have a… serious situation on our hands. I call to order a meeting of all PHANS. Our most beloved Phantom of the Opera, the Opera Ghost, the Trapdoor Lover (goddamn why are there so many names for everything?), Erik… has been kidnapped by hostile members of the group we know as CRITICS and is being held to ransom.

The demands are that we round up all incarnations of Erik and turn them in to the CRITICS. Failure to meet these demands will result in the Original Erik's extermination, and consequently all traces of Phantom will be erased from history. In short, he will have ceased to exist! We will no longer be PHANS, because there will be nothing to be a "PHAN" of. The songs won't exist… none of the movies… books… fanfiction… websites… see what I mean? This is not good!

Therefore, we propose this: Teams of agents will be sent in threes to locate each incarnation of Erik and bring him back to HQ. Obviously you will be taking him right in the middle of the story, so he will not come easily. You will have to convince (or kidnap) him away from his Christine and bring him here to be kept safely while we decide what is to be done in order to retrieve the original Erik.

We have compiled a list of essential Eriks that must be recruited:

1. Andrew Lloyd Webber Current Stage Version.

2. ALW Movie Version.

3. ALW Original Stage Version.

4. Lon Chaney Version.

5. Susan Kay Version.

6. Robert Englund Version.

7. Charles Dance Version.

8. Julian Sands Version.

Obviously this is not the full list or we'd be here too long and this would probably get booted off the site for being "a list".

In addition to this a small team of agents will be sent into the Original Book story to a) interview characters as to what they may have seen/heard and b) to comb the house on the lake for evidence.

Each Agent will be provided with:

An appropriate period costume.

An individual weapon (where you hide it is your business).

A flashlight (for those dark tunnels).

(You are also advised to bring along your copy of the original novel as a means of convincing your respective Erik incarnation to come along with you.)

Your field research will include watching/reading the appropriate version of the story. (Our hearts go out to whoever is going after the Julian Sands Version).

Obviously, you will be expected to behave accordingly in the time period. You are not to draw the attention of the public to our organisation in any way. Nor are Agents permitted to interfere in the story in any way. Some of you may be required to interact with other characters from the story in order to find your way, but you must use extreme caution in such situations, in case the story is in any way disrupted.

THIS ORGANISATION WILL NOT TOLERATE FOP-KILLING, CARLOTTA-KILLING, CHRISTINE-BEATING, ATTEMPTS TO INTEGRATE ONESELF INTO THE PHANTOM STORY OR CONVINCE CHARACTERS TO WANDER OFF WITH SOMEONE ELSE.

This operation will be known as "Operation: MASQUERADE".

Are there any questions?"

At the back, someone raised their hand.

"Yes?"

"Can I wear my Phantom T-shirt?"

There was a long pause.

"No."

Okay... you might have guessed this is going to be a bit different from my last fic. Completely different, in fact... and not to be taken seriously in any way. Basically this first chapter is to see how much interest there would be in this idea (how many of you would like to go after an Erik!) Just tell me (in review or e-mail) which Erik you want to collect or if you want to help investigate the kidnapping of Original Erik. Don't forget it's only three people per mission (maybe more for the investigation) so it's "first come, first served". I'll try and include everyone (even if you're just helping at HQ).

Bye for now!