A/N I hope this isn't to boring. It should get better after this chapter.
Chapter FiveI stood in the darkness of the living room looking out at the skyline of San Francisco. The serenity and calmness I was experiencing was surreal. I moved to the alcove window seat and sat down.
I have not felt this relaxed in sometime. Shifting around I tried to find just the right position. I finally pulled my knees up to my chest and rested my head on my hands and closed my eyes. The stillness in my mind was eerie. It had been a very long time since I had shielded this successfully, I wasn't even sure I could remember the last time. Jonathan's mind chatter was gone, and his emotions were completely absent.
Today's events had changed many things.
The meeting at Starfleet had to be postponed again.
The mind meld that Jonathan attempted with me had become a black hole. Allowing Jonathan complete access to the darkest recesses of my mind had been a serious mistake, my apprehension to allow him in was for good reason. Even though Jonathan was convinced that the two of us could remain on the outside as an observer during the meld, it failed and Jonathan became entangled in my distress; it had rendered him unable to function; forcing Phlox to sedate him.
V'Lar convinced me to let her perform the mind meld in place of Jonathan, positive that she could take me back to the moment that I had been abducted on Salanacon. It took three agonizing hours and we were both drained and totally exhausted afterwards, but I now had the answers to my nightmares.
Jonathan was in danger of suffering a complete breakdown. We had discussed many times during my recovery, why, he blamed himself, and why he suffered extreme guilt because he had been unable to locate me soon enough. I believed he had come to terms with his guilt because he seemed to accept the fact that I was to deep in the shaft for the scanners to find me. He had come to terms with what he had no control over and we had gotten on with our lives. I thought. Now this.
Jonathan had heard me beg and plead for my life; he had a permanent imprint on his mind of me screaming. He had seen what I had hidden from him all this time; he had felt the pain, he knew what had happened. Yes, we would have to start all over again. He had been afraid for me, and he had taken precautions for me, believing I would not be able to handle the truth; only it was Jonathan who could not handle the reality of what had happened.
In three days we were scheduled to leave for Andoria. The Admiral had managed to meet our requests, including Jonathan's promotion to Fleet Admiral. But first I had to reach into Jonathan's mind and help him to understand what he saw today.
It is very strange, since my ordeal, Jonathan has been my strength. Now it is my turn to be the strong one.
I had expended all my energy keeping my nightmares buried deep within the recesses of my mind. I had locked them away behind my shields, yes my shields. How ironic, locked behind shields that I thought no longer existed.
Ral was the owner of the factory and the leader of the group who abducted me. He had finally grown bored and let his foreman, Whitock, and two of his guards have me.
After what seemed like hours of torture, they must have felt certain that I could no longer defend myself because they made a mistake and untied me. They stretched me out on the floor to have their fun, in a split second I made it impossible for Whitock to ever reproduce. There would be no more sadistic animals from his bloodline. I couldn't help smiling, I felt the corners of my mouth curve up remembering the screams coming from Whitock, his friends trying to pull me off of him.
Ral crushed my kneecaps and my elbows after my incident with Whitock, when I regained consciousness he told me it was to keep me from getting away, but I knew better. I no longer cared.
Ral was also the one who poisoned me.
A mind meld with Jonathan after all that had happened was considered to dangerous for both of us, so, I hoped to seek a solution through quiet meditation with him. I did eventually succeed, answering his questions and guiding him to a state of mind that would be more receptive to a healing trance.
There is no doubt that Ral has a hidden agenda. He should have asked for someone else rather than me. He will not like my hidden agenda.
T'Pol's head tilted to the side, as she listened.
The bedroom door opened and Jonathan stepped out; looking around, his eyes came to focus on me. "I can't sense you T'Pol, are you alright?"
" I'm sorry Jonathan, I couldn't sleep. I didn't want to wake you so I came out here." He was upset. "I was just reflecting on today's events."
"It's been stressful, that's for sure." He lowered his head and stared at the floor. Not looking up, he asked, "Why, can't I feel you in my mind, T'Pol?"
"I raised my shields so that I wouldn't disturb you."
"I've never had problems with your shields before, have they gotten stronger? I still can't feel anything coming from you." He wouldn't look at me. "T'Pol, does this mean that we're not going to share anymore?" I could actually feel his distress.
"No, of course not, Jonathan; I admit that the calm and aloneness was nice at first, but, what I feel now is a cold emptiness. I still need to share the closeness with you, I hope you feel the same."
He had been holding his breath and it was obvious that he was relieved as he slowly exhaled. "It looks like the tables have turned on us." Jonathan had that sheepish grin on his face as he looked up. He seemed to be waiting for reassurance and understanding.
At first all I felt was confusion, then I realized he was talking about the fact that he had been the strong one protecting me; now, he knew I was protecting him.
"Jonathan, that's what bonded mates do, they take care of one another." He nodded in understanding then he went silent. I could feel his mind fighting through the drugs.
Finally he looked at me, "T'Pol, what are we going to do about Ral?" I could see the anguish in his eyes and hear the anxiety in his words.
I watched his body language and listened to his breathing while I searched for a way to break the news to him. "I have talked with the President and Admiral Marshall, Jonathan, I have also talked with the Prime Minister of Salan. I'm going to go through with this, but I need you with me." I waited for him to process what I had said so far. I could smell the fear in him. I pulled him down on the window seat close to me.
"Won't I hurt you more by being there? I don't know if I can keep from killing him if we're together in close quarters, T'Pol."
"Ral made a mistake when he demanded that I handle the negotiations. There is a very real danger here; but it's not to me. I'm convinced that he has something far more dangerous in mind."
"Like what, T'Pol?" Concern was written all over his face.
I shook my head indicating that I wasn't sure. "Ral indicated in his communiqué that I owe him my help, that he had somehow helped me while I was held captive, that I owe him for my life. That's not what I remember. Ral was the leader; he never left that shaft." I hesitated, giving Jonathan a moment.
Convinced that he could hear more, I went on. "You told me that I was held for two nights. With V'Lar's help I was able to see everything that happened around me during my conscious moments." I could feel Jonathan's shortness of breath. I took hold of his hand and massaged the pressure points that would help him to relax and I waited for him to calm down.
"Jonathan, Ral never attempted to stop his foreman or his two guards. He stood back against the wall of the shaft and watched. The only time he came out of the shadows was when he helped his guards pull me off Whitock."
"I want all of them, Jonathan, but I especially want Ral, I want him to pay for what he did to me and for what he allowed them to do."
Barely above a whisper, Jonathan asked, "What can anyone do after all this time?"
I arched my eyebrows to alert him to listen closely so that he wouldn't miss what I was going to say, "I discussed that very question with the Prime Minister, Jonathan, would you like to know what he said?"
"Come on, T'Pol, what the hell did he say?"
"Immediately after the agreement is signed, he will arrest Ral and the others and turn them over to the Federation. They will fall under the Federation's jurisdiction." I couldn't help but smile as I watched what I had said filter through Jonathan's drugged mind, understanding spreading across his face. I nodded. "There is no statute of limitations, Jonathan."
Afraid that he was going to cry, I took his hand and held it against mine, rubbing the sides of our hands together, gently at first; suddenly the electricity sent shivers throughout my body into his and then down my spine awakening strong desires. I pulled him to me, whispering in his ear, "Come with me to bed, Jonathan. It's my turn to lead."