The Binding Of Ranma Saotome

Chapter 5: Embrace of the Curry

Ranma sighed, and opened her mouth a couple of times experimentally. Well, she still had a mouth, so the day could be worse. So, today was another day, she assumed.

"Nuh… Pops?" She asked, rolling onto her side. A wave of nausea came over her. Slowly the memories of the past few days swam into place. Oh, right… "Pops, get me a bucket…" She said. She didn't want to have to face the school today, but there was no avoiding it. Dr. Tofu was out of town, so Ranma would have to wait a month to see him. Well, time to find another physician.

No, I don't want to… Was clutched in Genma's hand. Augh, that sucks.

Akane slid the door open.

"Ranma?" She asked quietly. Ranma rolled over to face her. "Breakfast is ready. Kasumi cooked." She said with a small, encouraging smile. Ranma, who was not up to thinking such thoughts, would have thought that Akane looked especially cute just then, but in her current state of mind couldn't fathom such thoughts. Ranma closed her eyes again.

"Thank you." She said. Akane flinched slightly, and left. Slowly Ranma rolled out of the tatami's warm and inviting covers to get dressed. As a rather putrid smell came wafting through the hall Ranma seriously considered the bucket prospect.

"'Morning." She said vaguely to everyone. Generally Ranma could be a morning person, and was rarely caught even a little bit asleep, other than when he was asleep, of course, but at this moment she was totally zonked out. Not one at the table seemed worried about it overly much, it was simply the fact that Ranma was sick. Akane, however, seemed really bent out of shape. She seemed – To Ranma – To be jealous, and yet grudgingly trying to make Ranma's life less of a burden.

Coming back out of those thoughts Ranma noticed the food in front of her. It wafted with awful smells, and made Ranma want to vomit even more than before.

She coughed.

"Itadakimasu!" Said everyone else, enjoying the meal. Ranma poked the food with her chopsticks. It acted as it should have, but the smell spread around some more.

Kasumi's cooking is good… She told herself. She took an experimental bite. It tasted poisonous.

Oh, god… She tilted her head back and covered her mouth, dashing for the bathroom.

After a few moments of vomiting, then silence Ranma looked back up at the little patchwork ceiling.

"Damn…" She said quietly.

Knock, knock, knock. "Ranma? Are you okay?" This was Kasumi's voice. Ranma smiled weakly, only for the change it would bring in her voice.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just, you know, a little under the weather, I suppose…" She said, though she knew she couldn't hide behind this lie for much longer.

…

Ranma had gotten ready for school by this point, though she hadn't the foggiest clue how she would face it. She'd had to borrow Akane's old uniform that was slightly tattered, and too small around the chest, as well as a bit too loose at the waist. She didn't say anything, lest she offend Akane and someone else found out.

"Itikimasu." She mumbled as she left. She'd dumped out the foul-smelling food that Kasumi had cooked for her lunch, the thought of feeling guilty hadn't even occurred to her.

After a moment of walking she glanced up at the fence she normally ran on.

Hop, tmp, crash.

Ranma, after making it up to the fence, and landing perfectly, simply couldn't balance.

"Augh, I hate boobs." She said, climbing out of the river.

"Ranma! We're gonna be late! Don't waste time!" Yelled Akane, running past her.

"Yay..." Said Ranma, dirty water dripping down her face. There was one thing to being a girl all the time; there was less how water around than cold, so he wouldn't be changing all the time.

…

Ryouga, at the steps of the Tendo Dojo, had gotten lost.

"Shampoo, why did you leave already?" He asked to the world.

"Shampoo is here." She said. "And she is ringing the doorbell!" Ryouga turned around.

"Oh, I, uh, I see…" He said quietly.

After a moment Shampoo was gone. He was left this nothing but a plan held in his mind. He didn't understand it, really, because apparently the staff did something, but Shampoo didn't seem to want to tell him. That was okay; he could care less about that dumb metal rod.

"Oh, Ryouga." Said Kasumi, opening the door. "Ranma and Akane are still at school, but they should be home soon, if you want to wait for them." Kasumi said as she ushered him inside.

"Oh, I, uh, y-yes, I'll wait f-for Akane." He said, a blush rising to his cheeks just from thinking about the girl. beautiful Akane...

As soon as she crossed the thresh hold that was the doorway he knew something was wrong, and it was his fault. Mainly this was because he'd just stepped on Kasumi's foot.

…

Class had been horrible.

Gym had been horrible.

Lunch had been horrible.

School had been horrible!

Ranma looked around again from her hiding spot – Up a tree – to make sure Kuno wasn't there. As a guy Ranma hated Kuno, but as a girl Ranma hated Kuno. She was pretty sure it was unhealthy to a baby to get squished in on its self. Well that could have been a perk; getting rid of pregnancy without abortion. Sadly, she didn't really feel like having her spine powdered, so it was a dilemma.

But at the present…

Life was horrible!

Kuno was out of sight, and Ranma knew this was the very best time to go, which is why she didn't. Bad things always happen at the very best time…

Kuno remained out of sight. Ranma craned her neck to see him. She sighed.

"Now or never…" She recited, standing up and dusting herself off. She stood there a moment. She was totally fine; nothing was broken, bruised, sprained or powdered. However despite all this she was regretting coming out, and she didn't yet know why.

"RANMA!" Ah, that would be why.

"Um, yes?" She said innocently.

"How did you become pregnant?" Said Akane in the level, cool tones of someone who doesn't want to explode in public, because they have a worse torture in mind.

"I don't know!" Said Ranma hotly, in the tones of one trying to get out of this worse torture by causing an explosion now.

"Normally babies have fathers…" Said Akane so quietly that Ranma would have strained to hear it, had he not already known her dialog.

"Are you implying--?" Ranma began, a little confused, and relieved he didn't have to finish the sentence when Akane cut him off with:

"No, I'm not implying! I'm interrogating! You had s--!" Ranma's hand was over Akane's mouth, and for the life of either of them, they weren't sure how it got there, least of all Ranma. Only the evil little squirrel knew the answer, but that's another story.

"No I didn't!" Ranma hissed, regretting touching Akane at all when she didn't consent first.

"Mnf-mnf-mfn!" Said Akane.

"'My-mince-muffin'?" Ranma retorted, raising one eyebrow. Akane looked sheepish, and then shook her head vigorously. "Ri-ight…"

Ranma removed her hand from Akane's mouth, and shrugged her shoulders as the evil little squirrel scampered off. "So what were you saying, then?" She asked, curiously.

"None of your business!" Akane shot back at him, a slight blush creeping up her cheeks. I really don't want him to know that I was saying my-mince-muffin… She thought, slightly embarrassed. Mind controlling squirrels are really evil.

"Of course it is my business!" He said. "You were talking to me, after all!" Akane knew that she had to change the subject, and fast.

"Well, who is that baby's father? You were just about to tell me, ri-ight?" She asked, looking up at Ranma expectantly. Ranma glared daggers at her. But since, again, they were not real daggers, Akane wasn't that affected. Ranma reminded herself to learn to glare real daggers… So instead, she dropped a bomb. But it wasn't a real bomb… nooo, that might hurt the baby! She was getting pretty sick of this stupid baby already…

I guess a hunch is better than nothing…

She added a few things up in her head very quickly, and decided what the most likely answer was.

"It's Ryouga's." She said, neglecting to mention her theory that Ryouga had used a magic staff to make her pregnant, and that she still had her virginity in both forms. That was one of the strange-ish things about having both a male and a female form. You ended up with a double virginity…

One of the strange-ish things about dropping bombs was that you ended up with large wooden mallets whammed into your head. And angry tomboys named Akane glaring daggers at you that were almost real. So real, in fact, that you had to dodge them… Oh, wait, those were the daggers that she was throwing.

"A…Akane?" Said a very battered looking Ranma. "Be careful. You might hurt the baby…."

…

Akane was sulking. Everyone in the house could tell, but the brunt of it fell on Ranma. When Akane sulked, a black storm cloud lay constantly over the house. When Akane sulked, you were in mortal peril just to raise your head… When Akane sulked, everyone in the house was angry with the one who had caused her to sulk. In this case – and most other cases as well - that meant Ranma.

When Akane sulked, life was hell. Because when Akane sulked, Akane cooked… with Ranma's reaction to Kasumi's food, she was sure that Akane's would be terrible. She selectively ignored the one instance when Akane's food had been good. No, delicious. Because that was just a fluke, right? She geared herself up as gently as possible to the fact that just this once she would have to eat Akane's food to get forgiven.

Ranma took another step forward, her mind wincing as she saw the kitchen door, looming in front of her. She took another step, and crossed the threshold… There, in the middle of the kitchen, sat her worst fear. A pot of hot water was boiling. Ranma was convinced that if it touched her, she would turn into a guy and kill the baby, and most likely herself. This meant a lot of very unpleasant cold showers and baths, but after training with his father this was nothing new.

The worst thing was the food bubbling in the pot. The curry. Akane's curry, looking so innocent and sweet. But just beneath the surface, death awaited…

She took one more step into the kitchen. Should she turn back? But no, too late. Akane had seen her already. "Umm…?" She said, barely above a whisper.

"Yes Ranma?" Akane said, her voice full of stinging ice and even more daggers. "You wanted something?" She said, telling Ranma with her every movement that she was most definitely not welcome here.

"Umm…?" Ranma repeated again. "Akane?" She tried, wondering if she dared ask her question. Too late she reminded herself. "May I try your curry? It smells wonderful!" She said, bringing up as much cheer as she could muster. "It… It really does…" She repeated rather quieter, surprised to find that she was telling the truth.

Akane glared. "Go on." She said, clearly wondering if she would really taste it.

This time she had tried it beforehand, and it was horrible… just let that Ranma lie to me! I'll make him eat platefuls! But Ranma was already serving herself. Strange how messy she could be… she already had food down her front, and she was just tasting, right…?

"That was good!" She said. Akane frowned. Ranma was still serving herself, so how…? "…So good that I need a fifth serving!" Akane couldn't quite hold back a gasp. It was true, half the pot was already gone, and she had cooked in Kasumi's largest pot, the one that took up all four burners and still hung off.

Akane wondered briefly where Kasumi had gotten such a thing, but it's in Ranma's POV, so that's not really in the story.

As Akane thought this, Ranma had emptied another bowlful and was refilling again for a sixth serving, a look of pure bliss on her forehead – Because that was the only part of her face still visible under the neon blue kelp sauce - even though she knew that she would throw this up in a little bit. It was just that good… which was weird. Akane had cooked this.

Oh, who cares anyway? She thought, happily shoveling more onto the plate. At least there is something here I can eat. Plus, it makes apologizing easier.

Just then, Kasumi walked into the kitchen and looked at Ranma's belly.

"Ummm, Ranma, are you pregnant?" Ranma's heart skipped a beat. Well, not a real beat. And not a real bomb, and not real daggers… so much fake stuff. She looked down at her stomach, and it was indeed round and poking out. But… but it's only been a week! She thought, suddenly much less happy.

"Umm… Kasumi, no." Akane said, lying badly. "He just ate a lot of food…" Which was true… in fact, Ranma realized, this was the cause of her 'Pregnant-looking' Belly after all. Just after realizing this, she realized that morning sickness couldn't tell that this was evening…

End Chapter Five

(A/N: the crappy parts were Me. Have forgiveness, and don't flame my sister…

Shun-chan

A/N: Michiko here, Sorry this one took so long, but I had writer's block, then so did Sis over here on my right. Sigh… And the worst part about it is she's starting the next chapter… And she's doing weird POV things that I have to mend slightly… Ahh well, hope you enjoyed this chapter all the same, cause I can't alter it too much, if I did it wouldn't be collaborative, and that would make me sad. I don't think I can write this all on my own.

P.S. I changed the Ryouga thing, because I agree, it didn't make much sence... But I couldn't just negate it, what with it being Sis' bit and all...

Miko-Chan.)