"I'm here for two people today, my sister Zooey and our friend Nigel. They were instant friends the minute they meet. Nothing at all could tear them apart, nothing. They were always together. You didn't see one without the other.
You don't need their life stories to know how much they meet to each other and to the world around them. I need to get to the part that brought me here.
When they were sixteen, I twenty-two, Zooey noticed that Nigel's cold wasn't getting better, so she took him to the doctor. He ordered an HIV test on both of that. Zooey tested negative, but Nigel didn't. He was HIV+. I had never seen anyone one cry as much or as hard as my sister did. Nigel reassured her that it would be alright; that he would survive this. In 1994, surviving HIV wasn't in the cards and she knew it.
Life went on after that. Thing were going well until late April of 1996. Then the worst happened. I remember almost everything of the night of April 29th, well almost everything. Zooey and Nigel had planned on going to see the premiere of RENT on Broadway. When Nigel showed up at the door he looked ill, but he insisted on going to see that musical with her. He almost demanded that they were going to see it that night. I think he knew something. I think he knew he was going to die and he wanted to spend his last hours with Zooey. They went to the musical and then to his apartment. She called me from there and told me she was going to spend the night. I knew she wanted to keep an eye on Nigel. She had said he was worse.
This is where the memories get fuzzy. I was told about this after the fact.
Nigel got extremely sick during the night. Zooey tried to call 911 and was put on hold. She wasn't going to wait so she hung up the phone and helped Nigel put his coat and boots on. She then helped him to the subway. They rode the subway from the East Village to NYU Medical. Nigel was admitted immediately. Zooey stayed and comforted him until it was over a few hours later.
I woke up about six AM and for a moment I got a queasy feeling. I thought it's was about Zooey at first then I remembered she was safe and sound at Nigel's. Then the phone rang. I knew instantly something terrible had happened, so I picked up the receiver.
I heard her say, 'He's gone. He's dead and I don't know what to do.' There was a long pause. I had no clue as to what to say to her. I was crying too much to think. Then I heard, "Casey, tell mum and dad I said I love them and I'm sorry. Case, remember I'll always be here for you. Just say the word and I'll appear.' That's when the line went dead.
I stood there for a moment not knowing what to do. What could I do? I didn't know where she was. I remember faintly grabbing my coat and my car keys. Everything after that is a blur until I arrive at NYU Medical. The moment I walked in they recognized me as the sister. They told me she had committed suicide right there next to Nigel's body. They said they didn't know why she had done it. I know why.
While Zooey and Nigel were homosexuals of a different race, religion, sex… they were two halves of a whole. Together they were one person one soul. Without the other they were nothing. They showed me that there is a bond greater than love and blood. I don't know what to call it, but it's real. To me, Zooey and Nigel were an avant-garde, bohemian, unconventional Romeo and Juliet.
I know some of you are saying that my sister didn't die from HIV or AIDS, but in a way she did. She died because the disease had taken her soul mate. In a way the disease has made us all its victims. It's taken away the things, the people, we cherish the most.
I place their shoes and quilt piece here to give the world an insight into who they were and to show that HIV and AIDS hasn't gone away. These shoes are they last pair they wore when they danced together. They were avant-garde theatre freaks to no end. Broadway was their dream, their funhouse, their life-long masquerade. They're love of the stage and all that goes into it would explain their quilt piece. I made just one because it was a fitting tribute to their friendship and their lives. If they were here to witness this, to see their patch, they would love it. I know my little sister would be a RENThead and a Wicked fan. She loved the idea of a production that taught you a lesson. I know Nigel would be right there with her.
It's only fitting that today is December 1st, Nigel's birthday. He would be twenty-seven. Even if Nigel had never contracted HIV, he and Zooey would still be here today, except they would be here in person instead of in spirit. The East Village was his, their, home and it was home to all their friends, most of whom are also gone.
Here's to my Wicked Witch of the West and her incredible Scarecrow."
"You ok, Casey?"
"You know, for the first time in a long, I feel great."