Nope, not mine.

I can't even express how much I love you!

Special thanks to XArcanexHopeX for editing the last chapter for me.

A/N: i´ve had the worst day, it sucked big time. My life is slowly but steadily falling apart, or at least that´s how i feel. so please, try to save my sanity, review! Maybe it´s blackmail, but right now that´s how i feel like! AHHHHHHH

Rory's POV

Here I was sitting in the waiting hall of Heathrow Airport, London, chewing nervously on my bottom lip. I was going back, back to the life I left behind, back to my life. Steven offered me a ride to the airport which I gladly accepted after all I was pregnant and had six suitcases. We said our goodbyes, promising that we would keep in touch, he was the biological father of my kid. I ran a hand over my purse where the most precious piece of paper was placed in. I couldn't stop smiling, I looked like a maniac, but I didn't care. I was feeling all sorts of emotions. Fear, excitement, hope, love. I was a bundle of nerves. I clutched my now empty cup of coffee. Decaf of course, I didn't want my kid to have three heads. I jerked up when my flight was ready to board. I pushed my way through the waiting crowd playing the pregnancy card. It took me hours or so it seemed to get past the security check once again. When I was finally sitting on my seat I allowed myself to take the note out of my purse. I reread it what seemed to be the millionth time. Two words, two wonderful words. Two syllables that made my heart burst. I looked at it, not believing how fucking beautiful these words were. " come home" was scribbled in his familiar handwriting. I was coming home, back home, home …. God, I love this word. Happily I repeated the words all over again: come home, come home, home, home, home. Home to jess. I received strange looks from the people next to me, but I just smiled and said:

" I'm going home, I'm excited" I added apologetically. The woman on my right looked at my only barely visible stomach and asked: " so, you're going home to the father"?

I hesitated. Oh God, did I go home to the father ? Would Jess father a child that wasn't his? All I knew that apparently he wanted me to come home. I took a deep breath.

" no, I'm going home to the dad." the woman smiled knowingly and let it drop.

I snuggled into my seat and tried to rest.

I was woken up by a flight attendant telling me that we were landing soon. I had been sleeping for nine hours? Suddenly the emotions were too much to take, I started to cry and when the nice lady next to me asked me if I was all right, I completely lost it. My sobs were getting louder. I tried to calm down, I really did. I murmured something about " hormones" and gladly accepted the tissue she was handing me.

No one knew I was coming, well I guess Jess knew, but he didn't know that it would be today.

I paid the cab driver and got out. I was standing in front of the building that had been my home for the last year. I left my suitcases at the airport, just in case … I climbed up the stairs to the apartment, taking my time. Every now and then I would stop to control my breathing. When I finally reached the third floor I took a last breath and went around the corner. Suddenly I was too shy to use the key. Part of me wanted to turn around and run, but the other part made me raise my hand to knock on the wooden door. I heard footsteps approaching from the inside and all of the sudden , I felt more scared than I have ever been in my entire life. More scared than the time my first article was published more scared than when I woke up and my mom was gone when I was five, more scared even than when I found out I was pregnant. I wasn't ready for this. Should I indeed run? The decision was taken out of my hand when the door opened and I stood face to face to Jess Mariano. I gasped while he was standing there, sign of complete shock visible on his face. What was I supposed to do ? Was I supposed to say something, hug him, kiss him? God, no I couldn't do that. Think Gilmore think!

I opened my mouth and the stupidest and at the same time the most appropriate thing came out.

" hi, jess." I tried to read his eyes for any sign of emotion. I caught non. He opened the door properly and gestured with his hand as if to invite me in. I carefully took a step forward and when he made no sign of slamming the door into my face, I stepped fully into the apartment. The silence was freaking me out. I looked around , nothing's changed. Good ! I felt his eyes on me, scanning me up and down and when I turned around I saw his gaze lingering on my stomach. I tried to catch his eyes once again, but again I failed. He was looking anywhere but me. Weird, I should be the one, standing in the corner, waiting for the verdict, but it was him looking like the one on the dock. Questions over questions were running through my head. What? How? Mixed with all those emotions and hormones raving around, I couldn't think straight.

Finally he broke the silence.

" huh, so you're back." oh god, oh god! And once more: Oh god. Holy shit!

"yeah, I'm back." stupid Rory, stupid Rory!

" you, huh, you want something to drink ? I just made a new pot of coffee." I pointed to the kitchen.

Oh my god! Would now be the time to point to my stomach and say "duh, I'm pregnant?"

No, it wasn't the time to be "duhing" but it was certainly the time to talk.

"no, no coffee, thank you." I saw him raising an eyebrow trying to lighten the mood. Suddenly understanding was dawning on him.

" oh" that was one hell of a meaningful "oh" .

" tea then?" I nodded, trying to come up with something to say, anything.

" I just spent a few weeks in London, I had to get used to tea." it all came back to one thing. I had been staying in London for the last couple of weeks, why was that again? Oh yeah! That…

He went to the kitchen, I assumed he wanted to make the tea, but he came back empty handed, looking determined.

" Rory, I think we have to talk." it was the first time since we were standing in this awkward position that he addressed me directly, using my name.

"talk, yeah, lets talk?" I looked down at my hand that still was wearing his ring. He looked down as well.

" you're still wearing it…" it was meant to be a statement , not a question. I chose not to reply.

He pointed to the couch, looking questioningly at me.

We sat down, not saying a word, not facing each other, both apparently totally engrossed with the table cloth. Finally I couldn't take it anymore. I lifted my head only to be met by his gaze. I swallowed. This was hard, this was so fucking hard. He locked his eyes with mine.

" you know, I meant it." what?

" when I said, come home, I meant it, but I wouldn't have thought that it would be so hard." I didn't dare to breath out of fear I might interrupt his train of thoughts. But he wouldn't continue. We sat in silence, each one of us deep in thoughts. Finally I broke down. I didn´t want to, but I couldn't hold back my tears an longer. A silent cry escaped my mouth, then another and another. Before I knew what was happening I was crying desperately. I expected anything, I expected him to tell me to leave, I expected him to yell at me but I didn´t expect his body close to mine, welcoming me in his embrace. Deep down I knew I didn't deserve it. I clung to him, never wanting to let go. I felt his body, I could smell his scent, my jess scent. I felt him. He wouldn't whisper soothing meaningless words in my ears, he would just hold me. I tightened my grip on him, telling him over and over again that I loved him. After what seemed an eternity he pulled away, looking at me.

" we have to talk about a lot of things, you know. And you telling me you love me won't solve all of our problems, but it's a start." and suddenly, his eyes were full of emotions. But most of all they were full of love. The breath was caught in my throat when he came closer and closer, pressing his lips on my forehead. I sensed hislips on my skin and at that moment hope was filling me, hope of getting him back and when he said " god , Rory, I missed you so much." I knew he had been as miserable as me..

So, what do you think ? bad ? good ? again lots of crying, but well that´s what pain does to you. review, it would definetly make my shitty day brighter.THANKS