After We've Said Goodbye, chapter 5
Written by Carolyn, Carolyn984@aol.com
"Through the hourglass I saw you
In time you slipped away
When the mirror crashed I called you
And turned to hear you say
If only for today
I am unafraid
Take my breath away. . ." Berlin ----------------------------------------------------------------
I shot a half-hearted glare in Jesse's direction in response to his overwhelming amusement at my frustration, and rolled my eyes. I would have liked to say that I was truly aggravated, but come on. Consider my situation:
A: I don't know if Jesse's laughing at me really ever aggravated me in
the first place, and
B: Jesse was *back*. Did I really have anything to be pissed off about?
Well, aside from the very-unfinished math history paper that still loomed in my dorm room, waiting to smother me in boredom upon my return. I guess you could consider that something to be miffed about.
Unless. . .
Unless you just didn't return to your dorm room, my mind tempted me. Then you could avoid the suffocation of the mathematical genius of old dead men and embrace the warmth and mystery of a certain other, *young* dead man. That was always an option.
An option that, quite frankly, I was all-too eager to take. When my teasing glare faded with Jesse's hand brushing my cheek, I smiled mischievously and took his hand in mine.
Attention, America: Suze Simon has another brilliant idea.
I broke our gaze, dropped his hand, and walked over to the balcony railing. Cautiously, I climbed onto it, steadying myself against the wall. Jesse was not the least comforted by this. His voice was aggrieved.
"Susannah. . . Susannah, please. What do you think you're doing? That is not safe."
I smirked at him. Since Jesse left, everything in my life had been dull. No more sneaking out to go mediate in the middle of the night, no more risking my life in situations that would be difficult to explain to my family later. No more reason to risk my life, really. For some reason, the dangerous ghosts just seemed to peter off with Jesse's departure, and well, to be honest, I kind of missed getting into trouble.
Especially when that trouble usually resulted in teaming up with and/or getting saved by a certain rancher from the eighteen-fifties. That was not a monumental deterrent.
So, standing atop the ledge, creaky as it was, I turned around to face him. Jesse was not looking too pleased. He looked nervous actually, and I guess I couldn't really blame him. It would probably suck for him if I suddenly plunged to my death minutes after he returned to the living world, after what must have been a lot of heavy-duty convincing of the Powers that Be on his part. I mean, it took six months! Honestly. There must be some pretty tough critics in the afterlife.
Although I think it would be pretty pathetic on my part if falling three stories would kill me, after all I had been through. Really, what a waste. So many people, dead and alive, had tried so hard to off me, unsuccessfully, and then I would go do it on my own. It would not be just a little ironic.
However, I was not determined to end my life quite yet. I still had too many messes to make. Well, messes to clean up, if you consider the fact that being a mediator, I apparently had Maid Service to the Undead tattooed on my forehead.
Anyhow, I smiled at Jesse and took a deep breath, enjoying the feeling of the Pacific breeze tossing my hair about my shoulders and back, tingling against the skin on my legs. It was like I was feeling the cool summer- like winds for the first time, like I had just woken from a deep sleep and was experiencing everything anew. Which, when you think about it, probably isn't all that far off considering my semi-catonic state for the previous half-year.
"Querida," his deep voice pleaded, "please come down from there. The railing does not look safe for a person to stand on like this." He reached his hands out and stepped toward me, letting them hover about my waist.
This only made me grin wider, and more devilishly. "Well, I guess I should get off then, huh?"
Jesse looked pained, and uneasy. I almost felt bad for him then. I mean, the guy probably didn't have too much to stress about while hanging around in purgatory—well, okay, maybe he did—and now here I was, giving him a ghostly heart attack.
Before he had a chance to respond, I turn around and leapt off the balcony.
It wasn't as bad as I was expecting, but then again, I had jumped off of my porch roof plenty of times before, and that was, like, two stories high. What's one more floor? Apparently not much. I straightened up, my feet and ankles smarting from the impact, and felt the rush of adrenaline coarse through my veins. It had been so long since I had felt passion to do much of anything; it was like with Jesse's return, all the mischief I should have gotten into in a six-month timeslot was fighting to come out all at once.
I cast my eyes upward toward the balcony to see Jesse leaning over it, an exasperated expression weaved in his perfect features. He groaned and dematerialized, only to reappear right beside me. It kind of sent my heart racing, and I jumped.
Give me a break, okay? I had gotten used to *not* having him pop up behind me all the time. Right now, this was something relatively new. Now it was my turn to clutch my hand to my chest and breathe heavily. I guess it served me right.
"I see you have not changed, Querida," Jesse teased from beside me, seemingly pleased to have startled me. Call it payback, I guess, for scaring the wits out of him just a minute before.
I rolled my eyes, shrugging off the remnants of my shock. "You should've asked the Greater Powers for some chains," I said half-bitterly. "Or a cowbell."
Jesse stared at me for a second, his dark eyes alight with amusement. Then he laughed. It started out gentle and low, but it wasn't long before he was really laughing at me, laughing at my mock annoyance, and it wasn't long after that before I joined him.
Let me tell you, laughing felt *good*. I had forgotten what it felt like to laugh that hard, to laugh for real, and to really, truly find happiness in much of anything.
All that had changed. Jesse was back, and it was like he wasn't gone at all.
Except for the small fact that he was. Gone, I mean. So I decided, since it was clearly in my best interests to make up for the lost time, to ditch my math history assignment—difficult as that was, ha ha—and to take off toward the beach with the man of my dreams.
Tomorrow was Thursday. I had class on Thursday. But then again, I thought with a gleam in my green eyes, would anyone really miss me if I didn't show up?
------------------------------------------------------------
2004 by Carolyn, Carolyn984@aol.com
Thanks for reviews! The more I get, the faster chapter 6 will appear. ;-)
Written by Carolyn, Carolyn984@aol.com
"Through the hourglass I saw you
In time you slipped away
When the mirror crashed I called you
And turned to hear you say
If only for today
I am unafraid
Take my breath away. . ." Berlin ----------------------------------------------------------------
I shot a half-hearted glare in Jesse's direction in response to his overwhelming amusement at my frustration, and rolled my eyes. I would have liked to say that I was truly aggravated, but come on. Consider my situation:
A: I don't know if Jesse's laughing at me really ever aggravated me in
the first place, and
B: Jesse was *back*. Did I really have anything to be pissed off about?
Well, aside from the very-unfinished math history paper that still loomed in my dorm room, waiting to smother me in boredom upon my return. I guess you could consider that something to be miffed about.
Unless. . .
Unless you just didn't return to your dorm room, my mind tempted me. Then you could avoid the suffocation of the mathematical genius of old dead men and embrace the warmth and mystery of a certain other, *young* dead man. That was always an option.
An option that, quite frankly, I was all-too eager to take. When my teasing glare faded with Jesse's hand brushing my cheek, I smiled mischievously and took his hand in mine.
Attention, America: Suze Simon has another brilliant idea.
I broke our gaze, dropped his hand, and walked over to the balcony railing. Cautiously, I climbed onto it, steadying myself against the wall. Jesse was not the least comforted by this. His voice was aggrieved.
"Susannah. . . Susannah, please. What do you think you're doing? That is not safe."
I smirked at him. Since Jesse left, everything in my life had been dull. No more sneaking out to go mediate in the middle of the night, no more risking my life in situations that would be difficult to explain to my family later. No more reason to risk my life, really. For some reason, the dangerous ghosts just seemed to peter off with Jesse's departure, and well, to be honest, I kind of missed getting into trouble.
Especially when that trouble usually resulted in teaming up with and/or getting saved by a certain rancher from the eighteen-fifties. That was not a monumental deterrent.
So, standing atop the ledge, creaky as it was, I turned around to face him. Jesse was not looking too pleased. He looked nervous actually, and I guess I couldn't really blame him. It would probably suck for him if I suddenly plunged to my death minutes after he returned to the living world, after what must have been a lot of heavy-duty convincing of the Powers that Be on his part. I mean, it took six months! Honestly. There must be some pretty tough critics in the afterlife.
Although I think it would be pretty pathetic on my part if falling three stories would kill me, after all I had been through. Really, what a waste. So many people, dead and alive, had tried so hard to off me, unsuccessfully, and then I would go do it on my own. It would not be just a little ironic.
However, I was not determined to end my life quite yet. I still had too many messes to make. Well, messes to clean up, if you consider the fact that being a mediator, I apparently had Maid Service to the Undead tattooed on my forehead.
Anyhow, I smiled at Jesse and took a deep breath, enjoying the feeling of the Pacific breeze tossing my hair about my shoulders and back, tingling against the skin on my legs. It was like I was feeling the cool summer- like winds for the first time, like I had just woken from a deep sleep and was experiencing everything anew. Which, when you think about it, probably isn't all that far off considering my semi-catonic state for the previous half-year.
"Querida," his deep voice pleaded, "please come down from there. The railing does not look safe for a person to stand on like this." He reached his hands out and stepped toward me, letting them hover about my waist.
This only made me grin wider, and more devilishly. "Well, I guess I should get off then, huh?"
Jesse looked pained, and uneasy. I almost felt bad for him then. I mean, the guy probably didn't have too much to stress about while hanging around in purgatory—well, okay, maybe he did—and now here I was, giving him a ghostly heart attack.
Before he had a chance to respond, I turn around and leapt off the balcony.
It wasn't as bad as I was expecting, but then again, I had jumped off of my porch roof plenty of times before, and that was, like, two stories high. What's one more floor? Apparently not much. I straightened up, my feet and ankles smarting from the impact, and felt the rush of adrenaline coarse through my veins. It had been so long since I had felt passion to do much of anything; it was like with Jesse's return, all the mischief I should have gotten into in a six-month timeslot was fighting to come out all at once.
I cast my eyes upward toward the balcony to see Jesse leaning over it, an exasperated expression weaved in his perfect features. He groaned and dematerialized, only to reappear right beside me. It kind of sent my heart racing, and I jumped.
Give me a break, okay? I had gotten used to *not* having him pop up behind me all the time. Right now, this was something relatively new. Now it was my turn to clutch my hand to my chest and breathe heavily. I guess it served me right.
"I see you have not changed, Querida," Jesse teased from beside me, seemingly pleased to have startled me. Call it payback, I guess, for scaring the wits out of him just a minute before.
I rolled my eyes, shrugging off the remnants of my shock. "You should've asked the Greater Powers for some chains," I said half-bitterly. "Or a cowbell."
Jesse stared at me for a second, his dark eyes alight with amusement. Then he laughed. It started out gentle and low, but it wasn't long before he was really laughing at me, laughing at my mock annoyance, and it wasn't long after that before I joined him.
Let me tell you, laughing felt *good*. I had forgotten what it felt like to laugh that hard, to laugh for real, and to really, truly find happiness in much of anything.
All that had changed. Jesse was back, and it was like he wasn't gone at all.
Except for the small fact that he was. Gone, I mean. So I decided, since it was clearly in my best interests to make up for the lost time, to ditch my math history assignment—difficult as that was, ha ha—and to take off toward the beach with the man of my dreams.
Tomorrow was Thursday. I had class on Thursday. But then again, I thought with a gleam in my green eyes, would anyone really miss me if I didn't show up?
------------------------------------------------------------
2004 by Carolyn, Carolyn984@aol.com
Thanks for reviews! The more I get, the faster chapter 6 will appear. ;-)