Disclaimer (Am I really going to do one of these every chapter?):
I
DO
NOT
OWN
RANMA
½
The Kami of Chaos sat in the break room with one of his 'subordinates' (he personally thought of them as lackeys), and drinking coffee. He was nursing a large bruise on his jaw and a black eye.
"What exactly," he said to his lackey, who had an arm in a sling and a lump on his head, "possessed you to take their picture?"
"Seemed like a good idea at the time," was the mumbled reply.
"Normally, I'd agree with you, but couldn't you have turned off the flash?"
"Spur of the moment decision! I didn't think about it!"
"Obviously. Now, as for you two…" he turned his attention to the Megami of Direction, who had her head on the table, and was clutching her stomach, and the Megami of Mystical Travel, who was holding her forehead. "Why, in the nine levels of hell, did you try to beat me up?"
"I thought it was a set-up to get a picture," said the Megami of Direction, whose glowing purple eyes were squinting in pain. "Why did you punch me in the stomach so damn hard?"
"For punching me in the eye. And what was with you and the frickin' club? You almost broke my jaw!"
"I wanted the stupid camera. How was I supposed to know you were all chasing him?" The Megami looked at Ryoga, who didn't seem to understand why her eyes were glowing orange. From his expression, she gathered that he didn't understand a lot of what was going on right now. "You didn't have to head-butt me for it."
"I'll try to bear that in mind the next time I see an angry goddess running and screaming at me in her underwear while trying to hit me with a stick. You got the camera, right?" They nodded, and the Megami of Direction held up a crumpled hunk of plastic. "Good, now I have some work to do." The two goddesses got up (well, one was still kinda hunched over) and left.
The Chaos God sighed as they closed the door. He looked over at his lackey, who was tenderly touching the lump on his head. "Hand it over."
"What?"
"The camera that you took the picture with. Now."
"Aww…" he held it out. "How'd you know?"
"Please, like any one of us wouldn't have done the same thing. Now, you," Chaos God snapped as he glared at Ryoga, "are going to stay here for a few days, understand?"
"BWEEE!!" Ryoga squealed from inside his cage. I have to get to Akane!
"No, you don't! If you go anywhere near that place until we get this resolved, I am going to have bacon with breakfast, get it!?"
"Bwee?" You can understand me?
"Well, aren't we the sharpest tack in the box! Yes, I can understand you. Now, if you want this," he held up a kettle, "you will sit still and stay quiet until I figure out what to do with you. You are not a prisoner; you're more like a guest who is not allowed to leave just yet. If you leave, something…" he thought for a moment. Ah, there was a good lie. "If you leave and go to the Tendo's, Akane Tendo will die. And so will you."
"BWEEEE!!" What's happened to Akane?! I have to help her!
Ryoga bounced around in his cage as the Chaos God shook it. "Now weren't you paying attention at all? If you, personally you, Ryoga, go there, she will die. And you will die. We are keeping you separate, to keep you both safe. Ok?" It was half a lie, Akane would be fine, but if Ryoga tried to pick a fight with Ranma the way he was now…
"Bwee…" Alright, I'll stay.
"Good!" Ryoga crawled out of the cage after the door was opened. A moment later, he sat next to the two gods, dripping wet.
-A/N - If Genma can still be dressed when he changes back, so can Ryoga-
"So… who are you, anyway?"
"I am Chaos. That's my name and my job! I am the Kami of Chaos, and this is Loki, my second in command."
"You… you're chaos gods?"
"No, no, no. Loki is a Chaos God. I am the Chaos God. You see?"
"Uh, yeah," said Ryoga, who didn't see at all.
Chaos rolled his eyes. "Come, I'll show you."
As they walked out the door of the break room, Ryoga asked, "Wasn't your arm in a sling?"
Loki smiled. "Nice thing about being a kami, you heal fast. I'll be in the office if you need me."
"I'll be there in a few minutes. This, pig-boy, is a department of what you call Heaven," said Chaos. "It's where all of us kami work."
"Don't call me that! Kami's… work?"
"Well, in a manner of speaking. We don't get paid. What we're working for is influence over the earth. Through this, we have avatars."
"What's an avatar?"
Chaos frowned. Where was this boy's education? "An avatar is a human on earth, whose presence naturally changes the behavior of those around him, or attracts those of the nature he or she is the avatar of."
"Huh?"
Chaos groaned. Right, try another approach. "An avatar influences other people to act like the kami they represent. Usually we pick martial artists, because they're powerful people, and can fend for themselves, or at least defend themselves. For example, Eunomia, the Megami of Order, chose two men, and a girl."
"A girl who… creates order?"
"Yes. Though Eunomia just had to pick someone born in Nerima."
"Is that bad?"
"For me it is! It's where I (for lack of a better term) was born! The whole district of Nerima is practically a spring for chaos because of it! Then she had to go and have her female avatar live there, and for years, the chaos of the whole place was subdued."
"Uh, ok." Ryoga was a little, er, lost, in the conversation, but understood that the person they were talking about was on earth to help Nerima stay peaceful, because she had the Megami of Order helping her.
"Now, this is the office of Ebisu-"
"The Kami of wealth of the sea!"
"That's right! But he was promoted 20 years ago, he's now the God of all wealth. His avatars tend to be… well, a little greedy. His avatar also lives in Tokyo."
Ryoga thought for a moment, trying to remember who in the Nerima district was greedy. "Nabiki Tendo?"
"You'd think so from the way she acts, but no. Nabiki Tendo is the way she is naturally. Being an avatar does not change who you are, or the way you behave. It just changes how the world reacts to you being around. The avatar for Ebisu, by the way, is a man named Kinnosuke Kasha-o. Have you met him?"
"I don't think so…"
"You'd remember if you did. Another naturally greedy man; won't spend 10 yen to save his life. Instead of a real butler, carries around a little ventriloquist's doll. He is one of the two avatars allowed to Ebisu."
"Who is the other one?" Ryoga was now too interested to remember to ask why he wasn't allowed to leave.
"Didn't pick one. He says he wants to get used to the promotion before he picks another. Maybe in a few years, he might."
"How many are you allowed to have?"
"It depends. Office, power, abilities… the strongest Kami can have four, though for each extra avatar, the others lose a little influence over the world around them. You with me so far, bacon-breath?"
"Stop calling me names, you sound like Ranma! And, the more avatars you have, the weaker they are in creating… chaos?"
"Exactly."
"How many do you have?"
"I can have four, but I've only got one."
"Why?"
"So I can concentrate on him, and just him. Loki is a rarity, just powerful enough to claim one, and he's not even in charge of his office!"
"Who does he have?"
"He was supposed to pick one just eighteen years ago, but there was… a complication."
"Like what?"
"He and a Goddess picked the same person at the same time. A human can't be the avatar for two different Kami or Megami. Usually if that happens, they just sit down and talk it out, but they had just broken up, and they weren't talking. Neither one still won't let go, so there's a girl down there influencing people in two entirely different directions. It's amusing as hell, but irritating. It's gotten to the point where a year ago, Kami-sama himself actually called them into his office to make a condition for one of them to let go of the girl."
"Huh? Kami-sama?"
"The one who is completely in charge. Think if him as everyone's boss. Now, it depends on who she marries, I believe. Kami-sama won't tell anyone the details. I'm hoping Loki gets her."
"Why?"
"Because she's also Eunomia's avatar. If she goes over to Loki completely, Nerima will be complete chaos, just like before she was born! Even better, since my avatar is living there, and he's the subject of the marriage!"
Ryoga's head was spinning as his brain tried to get a hold of so much information at once. A girl who had the unfortunate fate of being, temporarily, both chaos and order, and the thought of a Chaos God and an Order Goddess dating.
Watching them trying to have dinner together must have been weird, he thought. His head began to hurt.
"Am… am I someone's avatar?"
"No, you're just a talented martial artist who happens to turn into a breakfast food in the rain. Here we are! This is my office."
Ryoga stepped inside. He saw Loki, who appeared to be trying to split his head in half by grinning, with two other gods laughing next to him.
"Something funny, gentlemen?"
Loki grinned at Chaos. "Our avatars are acting up."
"Let me see." Chaos shoved his way in front of everyone, and looked at a small monitor that hovered in the air. He began to laugh.
Ryoga looked at Loki. "You went out with an Order Goddess?"
"Yup."
"What… what was it like?"
"She wanted to go for long walks; I wanted to go on roller coasters."
Ryoga's head began to spin again. There was something horribly wrong with that picture. Then he saw that the Loki and Chaos were standing on either side if him, and that the two other Chaos Kami were blocking the door. "What's going on?"
"Sorry," said Loki, "but we can't let you leave just yet. You'd only get in the way of our avatars getting together. Once they're together, Eunomia has to give her up."
"B-But I don't even know them! How would I get in the way?!"
"Oh? You do know them, you know them quite well."
Ryoga backed away from Loki and glanced at the monitor. There were two people on it, kissing. He felt Loki and Chaos restraining him as he shrieked, "Akane and Ranma?! Damn you, Ranma!"
Akane froze as Ranma's lips pressed against hers. N… nani? The last thing she recalled, she had been trying to strangle Ranma. If she had been to kill him, why was he kissing her? Realization hit her. I touched him!
Akane pulled back from the kiss. "Ranma, sto-"
She was cut off as Ranma pushed forward, kissing her again. Her mouth was open from trying to talk, and she jumped as she felt Ranma's tongue caress hers. An involuntary shudder ran through her.
Akane tried to pull back again, but found that the wall was now behind her, and she couldn't go anywhere. What now? How do I stop him?! I don't-
Her thought was cut off as Ranma pulled her into his lap, forcing her legs to go around him. "What are you doing?!" is what Akane tried to say, but all that came out was "Mmph?!"
She felt one of his hands slip underneath her shirt, and run over her chest bindings. No! Ranma, let me go! Stop it! All Akane could do was pound on his back with her hand. He didn't seem to notice her doing it as she pounded on his back with all of her strength. How strong is he? Ranma slipped his other hand under her shirt, and started squeezing lightly.
Damn you, Ranma, that… that…Her thoughts trailed off as Ranma continued to play. A slight pinch from him made her gasp in spite of herself. Oh, Kami, why do I have to like this so much? Please Ranma… no more… Akane begged through her thoughts, unable to say them with Ranma's mouth still against hers. Stop, Ranma, stop it!! She continued pounding on his back as hard as she could. She might as well have been pounding on a practice dummy; at least they did something when you hit them. Akane began to realize just how powerful Ranma might be. Is this why… he won't spar with me?
One of Ranma's hands left her chest, and worked it's way down her. His hand slipped under her skirt, brushing against her thighs. Ranma, what are you doing?! Against her will, her body shuddered from Ranma's touch. Heat flushed through her as Ranma began to stroke her through her panties. So… nice… Ranma… please stop… Akane's hand stopped pounding on his back, and held onto his shirt as tightly as she could as her breathing grew ragged. She opened her eyes, and realized that her head had rolled back, and Ranma was kissing her neck. W…when did that…?
She dropped her head onto Ranma's shoulder, trying to slow her breathing enough to speak.
"Ranma…" She gasped as his fingers pressed a little harder. She held onto his shirt like it was lifeline, and tried again.
"Ranma… please… stop… I don't want it…" Not like this, Ranma please! It was useless, but she had to try before her body made her stop resisting. She knew that there was really no stopping him. So it came a shock to her when Ranma froze, then gripped both of his hands in his head, like he was in horrible pain.
"… please… stop… I don't want it…"
Stop. Ranma froze. Wha…?
Take her.
Do not.
Take her now.
She does not want this.
Does not matter, she is touching me. I must have her.
Forcing myself on her is dishonorable.
Who cares? the voice if the potion demanded.
I do. She would hate me for this.
But I must have her! Take her!
Do not!!
Ranma clutched his head as the voices inside him gave out conflicting orders.
Take her! No. I want her! I will not dishonor her. Take her now! She doesn't want this. I must have her! She said to STOP!! TAKE HER NOW!!
"No," Ranma whispered.
MINE!! TAKE HER!!
SHE SAID SHE DIDN'T WANT THIS.
TAKE HER NOW!!
"I won't."
"No."
Akane blinked as Ranma spoke. "Ranma? What's happening?"
Ranma clutched at his head harder. "I won't," he gasped.
"No…" he whispered again. "I'm not going to."
Akane stared. What was going on?
"N-not…"
"Never."
Who was he talking to?
"That's right… not like him… when Akane's asleep…"
Not like who Akane thought. What about when I'm sleeping?!
"N-not gonna… dishonor…"
"Akane Tendo."
She jumped, looking up. Mousse stood next to her, his expression was one of both shock and understanding.
"Mousse?"
"I can't…" Ranma said. "She said stop…"
"You should let go of him now, before he looses the fight in his mind."
"But I'm not touching…" Akane looked at Ranma, and found the hand she had been choking him with was still at his neck. She let go.
"Told you… I… wouldn't," Ranma gasped, and crashed to the floor, unconscious.
Akane stared at the floor, blushing. "How… how long were you there?"
"I came in just before you asked him to stop."
"T-then you saw…"
"I won't tell anyone, Akane Tendo. You should go to your room. I'll take care of Saotome."
"What about Cologne?"
"The old voodoo doll is still outside, digging through my robe. I won't tell even her." Akane finally noticed that Mousse stood only in his pants and a white shirt. She listened, and heard the old woman's voice cursing from outside and the sound of tearing cloth. She stood, and started walking to the stairs, still blushing. The book Cologne had brought over caught her eye. She glanced back at Mousse. He had his back to her as he checked Ranma's pulse at full arm length. Akane snatched the book, and started up the stairs. There was something she needed to know, something she wanted to understand. Maybe the book that would help her find it.
"Well, Saotome," Mousse told the unconscious boy. "You should at least know that she was enjoying your attentions. Even I could see that."
Akane slammed to a halt on the steps. Her eye twitched, and stress marks popped up on her head.
3…
2…
1…
Ignition.
"Mousse no baka!!"
Smoke rose from Mousse's head as the thrown mallet smashed into him.
Now in her room, Akane began turning the pages of the ancient Amazon book, passing through page after page of potions that ranged between incredibly useful to incredibly bizarre. Here was a potion that forced you to sing as loud as you could until someone smacked you twice. How do they test these things?
More pages, more potions, more of 3,000 years of Amazon tricks. Truth potion, potion to heal, potion to make plants grow faster, a potion to turn your hair purple? Did Shampoo take this one by accident? A potion to fix your eyesight? I wonder why Mousse never took this one… Cologne probably wouldn't tell him about it, since he's male… That's kind of unfair… It's probably why she's so old and doesn't wear glasses. Oh, it makes your eyes HUGE… I guess she did take it… Hey, look, it's the phoenix pill…
She kept going through the book, trying to find something like what she wanted. She was almost through at the potion Ranma had taken when she found what she was looking for. Close enough, Akane thought. It's as close as I'm gonna find.
She began to write down what she needed.
Nabiki strolled out of Kasumi's room. Her older sister had finally fallen asleep. She had seemed so tense for so long, that Nabiki had started to worry that she might be rushing toward a nervous breakdown. It was only a few minutes before Kasumi had started sleeping that her smile had returned and she relaxed. Nabiki had left to see how things were going with Ranma. It wasn't exactly what she had expected.
Ranma was passed out in the living room, propped up against the wall. Akane was nowhere to be found, and Mousse, missing his robe, was sitting against the doorframe, smiling, and looking out at the yard with interest. The object of his amusement was apparently his robe, which seemed to be spewing weapons of it's own accord, until Nabiki heard Cologne's voice coming from the lump inside the center of the robe. She sounded like she was having some sort of conniption fit as she tore through Mousse's robes. The ancient Amazon was swearing in Chinese as she threw things from the cloth. There was a five-foot stack of weapons and objects in a pile a few feet away. Shampoo was unconscious on the ground, and Genma Saotome was still performing as a wall decoration in a corner. Nodoka Saotome was sitting next to him, sipping tea. Nabiki guessed that her father was still in his room.
"What is she doing?" Nabiki asked Mousse.
"Looking for her spice rack full of potions so she can wake Shampoo up."
"In your robes?"
"It's where it's usually hidden, Nabiki Tendo, so that Shampoo will not find it."
"Looks like it's hidden too well if Cologne can't even find it in there."
"Cologne left it in Shampoo's room before we came over. I'd stop her, but it's not my place as an Amazon male to correct a village Elder."
"The fact that she sounds like her head might pop at any given moment has nothing to do with it then?"
"I think if it as… a consolation."
There was a small pause. Behind them, Akane slipped into Kasumi's room, the small sounds she made as she crept along hidden by Chinese curses.
"How did you fit all of that into your clothes, anyway?"
"I mastered the Art of Hidden Weapons. All of that's just what I carry with me on a normal day. I have more on me when I know I'm going to fight."
Mousse looked up at Nabiki and smiled.
Nabiki couldn't help but smile back.
Cologne's cursing devolved into random syllables.
"Have you ever considered corrective surgery instead of glasses?"
"Surgery on my eyes? No thank you."
"What about contacts then?"
"What are contacts?"
"They're very tiny pieces of plastic that go onto the surface of your eyes."
"Little pieces of plastic you stick in your eyes that help you see? Sounds painful."
"Not really. They're so thin that you get used to them, and sometimes forget that you even have them on." Nabiki thought for a moment. "Think of them like hidden glasses that only you know exist."
"Hidden glasses that only I know about…" Mousse mused.
-You!! Boy!! The spice rack is not here!!- Cologne shrieked in Chinese as she threw the robe off of her.
"Ah, forgive me, Elder! I must not have put it away the last time you requested it of me! It must be back at the restaurant!"
Nabiki had a pretty good idea what Cologne had said, and turned her head to hide a smile from Mousse's completely true and abject apology, knowing full well that Mousse had known from the start that it was still at the Nekohanten.
I am going- Cologne shook her head, and started again in Japanese. "I am going to get it! You will stay here and watch over son-in-law and Shampoo until I get back! Keep them separate if Shampoo wakes up, understand?!"
"Of course, Elder!"
"Good!" Cologne bounded away, throwing herself across the roof.
Mousse turned his eyes on Shampoo. "Watch over Shampoo…"
Nabiki's eyebrow did a perfect Spock Maneuver. She had a good idea where this was going to go. Dammit, she needed film!
"Watch over Shampoo in case she wakes up…" Mousse leaned back against the doorframe again as Nabiki watched in interest. "Keh! Let her sleep! It's better when I don't have to hear the stupid girl!"
Crash!!
"Nabiki Tendo, are you feeling alright?"
Nabiki picked herself up from the massive facefault. "Wha… you… Shampoo… huh?"
"I got over her."
"But… but…" sputtered Nabiki. "When did… you're always…"
"Yes, well, I had to keep up the act didn't I? If I wasn't interested in Shampoo anymore, the old mummy would send me back to China in a second! I only keep it up because fighting Saotome is good training!"
"But… but… when?!"
"I started to realize it after that horrible wedding six months ago. Give me a little more credit, Tendo-san. Bombs everywhere! Shampoo and Ukyo-san blowing things up! Explosive okonomiyaki! Those two girls were insane." Mousse sighed. "Shampoo's been raised by Cologne since she could walk to be an Amazon Elder. Nothing has ever been denied her, and if there was something that Shampoo wanted that could not simply be given to her, Cologne trained her in any form, technique, or trick that she could think of to make sure Shampoo could get it some other way. The first time Cologne denied her something was when she told her not to use potions on Ranma Saotome anymore. She was so unused to it, that she turned around and promptly manipulated me into giving her what she wanted. It was just a little while ago, when I saw Shampoo trying to escape to the dojo to see if she could force Ranma into taking her that I saw Shampoo in a different light. She really doesn't think that the potion in Saotome would make him to anything but bed her, because that's what she wants. Hah! I know what Saotome thinks of her, because I see her the same way he does now!
"I also know why she would never want me, because I was willing to give myself to her from the start. What challenge is there in having someone who was that willing to be had? She wanted someone who could beat her, and I know why. Because Ranma was better than her, and so she wanted him. Not as a woman in love wants a man, but so she could parade him around the village and say, 'Look! This is the greatest warrior to be found, strong enough to beat even me, and now he is my piece of property!' Shampoo is the most spoiled brat in 3000 years of Amazon history, and I want nothing to do with her anymore."
Crash!!
"Are you going to keep doing that, Tendo-san?"
"This… is too much at once…" Nabiki complained from her spot in the floor.
"I don't even have to see her reaction to know that it's more amusing than could be, Mousse."
"Ranma?!" sputtered Nabiki. "You've known about this?!"
"It's hard not to notice when Mousse suddenly starts pulling back on his attacks, even if I could tell that he wasn't even aware that he was doing it." His head turned toward Mousse. "Now I don't have to beat it into you."
Mousse signed again. "It's just a matter of time, now."
"Until what?" asked Nabiki.
"Until Shampoo and the mummy figure out it for themselves, and send me back to the village. My visa for Japan states that I'm working for a traveling circus. That how I got here, remember? I don't want to go back there. I'm one of the best warriors in the village, and I'm treated like dirt because I'm not one of the precious 'blooded' and I don't feel like I have to kill someone for the title. It's an entire way of life dedicated to hypocrisy, and I would be better off without it. Until I can figure out a way around being sent back, I'm going to be hugging mailboxes screaming 'Oh, Shampoo!' until I want to gag. You know, Saotome, that Cologne deliberately knocked Shampoo into the spring of drowned cat?"
"What the hell would she do that for?!"
"I don't think she understood that you had the Neko-ken. She was trying to find a way to let Shampoo get close to you without you knowing. Shampoo was all for it; she thought it would make you feel responsible for her curse, and marry her."
"Ugh… no wonder she was like that when she came back. She showed up when I was trying to take a bath… the next day she dragged my back into the shower and was yelling at me 'What you do about this body?' I can't believe she thought I'd marry her for that… and she did it on purpose…"
Nabiki interrupted. "8000 yen."
"What?" Mousse demanded.
"8000 yen and I can have your visa changed."
"Y-you can do that?!"
"Never underestimate Nabiki, Mousse. I keep doin' it, and look where it gets me."
Mousse walked out into the yard, and pulled his wallet from the pile of wood and steel. 8000 yen went from his wallet into Nabiki's hands.
"What do you want your visa to be for?"
Mousse stopped, thinking. Before he could think of anything, Ranma cut him off. "Teacher."
"Teacher?"
"Yup, teacher."
"And what, Saotome, will I be teaching?"
"Teaching Chinese, and special instructor for the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts." Nabiki raised an eyebrow at that, but left to go make a few phone calls.
"You'd… accept me as a sensei for your dojo?"
"Anything Goes mean anything goes. And you said it yourself, you've mastered hidden weapons pretty well. At least you're fun to fight with; sometimes I never know what's gonna come flying outta those sleeves a yours. I'll show ya how to fight with something other than chains and swords that pop outta nowhere, and you show me where you're putting all those things. When you're not trying to kill me, you're a damn good fighter."
"Saotome, I would be honored. And… I want to apologize for having been a part of what you're going through."
"You can call me Ranma, ya know. You sound like Kuno when you call me Saotome. And don't worry about it, there's worse things that could of happened. But I swear, if you turn into one of the weirdos around here that try to flirt with my girl side…"
"Don't flatter yourself, Ranma."
"Good, keep your feathers to yourself, duckboy." Ranma grinned at Mousse, who laughed at him.
"Now I have a reason to make you say my name right!"
"It's Mousse."
"Mu Tsu."
"That's what I said. Mousse."
"Mu Tsu. Xian Pu. Kho Lon."
"Mousse. Shampoo. Cologne."
"This is going to take some work, I see."
"You couldn't see the bus that ran you over."
Mousse and Ranma burst out laughing.
"My… my son…" Mousse and Ranma turned toward the sound of his mother's voice. Tears were rolling down Nodoka's cheeks.
"Your mother is crying, Ranma."
"Mom? Something wrong?"
"You… you turned a man who fought against you into your friend and an instructor for our style of martial arts…"
"Uh, yeah? So?" Ranma couldn't understand why she was crying over that.
"My son is so manly!!" cried Nodoka.
Crash!! Mousse and Ranma both lost their balance and fell into the ground.
"Is… is your mother always like this?"
"Yeah… It's kinda hard to get used to… She keeps trying to get me to peep on the girls when they're in the bath…"
"Why?"
"She thinks it's manly or something."
Nabiki walked back into the room, smiling. "Done. I'm having your new papers delivered here in about an hour. Will that be soon enough?"
"An hour? Is that even possible? How…?"
"I just called a few people I know who owned me a favor, no biggie."
"But… an hour…"
"Don't ask too many questions, duckboy," Ranma muttered. "It's probably safer for us if we don't know how she does stuff like that."
They both heard a groan as Shampoo picked herself up off the ground, and staggered inside. Ranma heard Mousse grinding his teeth as he prepared to go into his "Shampoo, my love!" speech.
"There's a TV to Shampoo's right," Ranma whispered.
"Thanks." Mousse tipped his glasses up over his head, and dove for the television, thanking the heavens that it was alright. Shampoo glared at him as he continued his praise and declared his undying love for electronic images.
"Stupid Mousse…" Shampoo muttered. "Airen!" She dove for Ranma, tackling him before anyone could blink. Ranma's body stiffened like a pole, then his hand shot out…
And his fist drove Shampoo through the ceiling.
"What… was that?" asked Ranma. "I think I just nailed an Amazon."
"She's stuck in the roof, and I think you knocked her back out. Let me pull her down, and I'll chain her back up."
"I'll help you," Nabiki said. "At least now, I have an answer to that question."
"What question?" demanded Ranma from beneath his blindfold. He was actually thankful that Shampoo had gotten stuck. At leas that way, she hadn't dropped back onto him just to end up being beaten more by Ranma's fists.
"Whether or not you like Shampoo."
"You could have just asked," grumped Ranma.
Across town, Ukyo stood behind her stove, talking herself out of visiting Ranma. She wasn't sure why she was doing it, but it just seemed like every time she had wanted to visit him today, something seemed to tell her just to stay away from him. You need to give him time, Ukyo. He just forgave you a little while ago, and that was the first thing he'd said to you in months. You want to mess it up? Let him come to visit you first.
Signing, she flipped the okonomiyaki she was preparing for her latest customer onto a plate, and resigned herself to another day without her Ranchan.
"Kasumi."
Kasumi shifted in her sleep.
"Kasumi-oneechan…"
She fidgeted, starting to wake.
"Kasumi-oneechan, please wake up. I need your help."
"Akane-chan? It that you?"
"It's me Kasumi. I need your help with something."
"What is it, Akane?"
"I need your help making this." Akane held out the copied potion from the book in front of Kasumi.
"Akane, it's not yet lunch. Please don't spoil your appetite by trying new recipe's right now."
"It's not a recipe, Kasumi, it's… it's a potion, ok? From that book. I need to make it perfect and… I need your help to make sure it gets done right."
"Is it a cure for Ranma?"
"No, it's… for me. Please Kasumi, I need this, and I don't want to mess it up."
Kasumi looked up and saw something she had never before seen on Akane's face. A plea for help, mixed with… fear?
"Alright, imouto, I'll help you."
A/N
Gobstopper: Sorry about taking so much longer with this chapter than any of the others, but I've been doing more fanfic reading than writing. I've read so many Ranma fanfics, and for the hell of it, several Inuyasha. I do have this to say: What is with people putting Kagome and Sesshomaru together? Did I miss something here? Bizarre.
Akane: GET DOWN HERE, DAMN YOU.
Gobstopper ignores her.
Gobstopper: I've decided to let Ranma curse, since he does in the Japanese version of the manga and anime. It's just been cut out for the English version. Blasted censors. Like we can't handle someone cursing. Bah! I've also decided to break Mousse a little from the norm, and let him see Shampoo a little4 differently. I think the boy deserves it, really. He gets beaten on more than Ranma does.
Akane: COME HERE FOR YOUR POUNDING!!
Gobstopper: Persistent, isn't she? Ah, the luxury of being on the roof. So, any bets of what potion Akane wants? And real quick, no, it ain't what Ranma's got. She wants something else. So people are getting OOC, I'm trying to write something here! Some OOCness is required for this kinda stuff!
Akane: I'M GONNA KILL YOU!!"
Ranma: Me first.
Gobstopper looks up.
Gobstopper: Uh, hey.
Ranma: 'Hey' my ass! What the hell are you FEEDING me in this fic?! Stupid Amazon potions, that's what! Go visit Akane!
Ranma punts Gobstopper down to the street. Horrible screams and loud bashing sounds occur.
Gobstopper: AIEE!!! See you people… STOP PLEASE!!! next chapter… NO DON'T FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!! I hope. ARGH!!! THAT'S ATTATCHED, PLEASE DON"T PULL ON THAT ANTYMORE!!! AIEEE!!!