A/N: This is actually a fic that I've had saved on my computer for a while – in fact it's been around for longer than most of my recent fics so I don't know why I haven't uploaded it before now. Writing is a little dated in comparison but there you go.
Colette and Presea have a conversation a little while after the Chosen has been rescued from the Dragon's Nest.
Colette stifled a yawn and shifted position in her bed, pulling the blankets up further over her body as she considered sleeping for the tenth time that night. The blinds on the window beside her were still raised from when she had been looking out at the stars earlier, and the former objects of interest continued to sparkle in the velvet blue sky – urging her to continue with her whimsical indulgences.
She rolled over and closed her eyes against the pale milky moonlight that was spilling into the room but it was no good – she just wasn't sleepy. Opening them again, Colette watched the mound under the covers of the bed opposite for a few moments. Since Sheena had began to help Raine with her writings on summon spirit physics, Colette had been sharing her room with Presea – the pink haired girl often already asleep before the Chosen retired for the night.
Colette sighed, and yawned again – rubbing at her eyes in an attempt to convince herself that she was actually tired.
"Colette…are you awake?"
"Mm?" The young Chosen looked back across to where Presea was lying to see that the small girl hadn't moved in any way. The question had been so barely audible – a soft whisper carrying itself across the silence of the room – that Colette was unsure at first if her mind was just playing tricks on her.
"Not yet," she replied quietly. There was silence for few seconds and Colette began to wonder if she had just imagined the question, feeling a little foolish. But then Presea rolled slowly over to face the Chosen's direction, her expression unreadable in the weak moonlight. "I see…then are you fatigued? If not I…would like to ask you a question."
"Sure." Colette sat up, wrapping the warm, soft blanket around herself and brushing unruly strands of her from her face. "Is something wrong?"
Presea rolled onto her back, her eyes staring up at the ceiling. "Are you…um, afraid of death?"
"Huh?" The Chosen looked across at Presea, wondering what had made her come out with such a question.
"Forgive me…I probably phrased it wrong." Presea looked as though she was biting her lip in thought. "Redefined Question. When you were on your journey of World Regeneration…you would have had to, uh, give up your life, correct?"
"Um…yeah, that would have happened." Colette felt bad for a few moments, the way she always did when she thought about the duties she had, in a way, forsaken.
Presea looked over, her eyes unblinking. "Then…did you fear it?"
Colette thought about it for a second before nodding, her blonde hair tumbling around her shoulders as she did so. "Um, well…I had been preparing for it my whole life so I sort of knew it was going to happen…but yeah, I guess I was scared when it came down to it." The young Chosen paused for a moment, studying Presea's face. "Why do you ask?"
The pink haired girl turned her gaze back to the ceiling for a few moments before closing her eyes.
"I…need time to formulate my thoughts."
In the silence that followed, Colette watched the shadow of the vast tree outside, etched by moonlight onto the wall opposite her and thought about all of those little, tiny occasions where her faith had been shaken and she had considered abandoning her journey. On each of them, she had to admit, she had been in the grip of a terrible, unrelenting fear of losing her life. No, that was wrong, it wasn't just the thought of dying, but also losing everybody she had come to hold so dear over the journey. Now that she had made more friends, and seen so many sights, the Chosen really doubted if she would be able to sacrifice herself in the manner her role dictated.
Presea sat bolt upright suddenly, interrupting Colette's thoughts. "I fear dying…in a way. At least…that is what I believe it is."
Colette smiled sympathetically; hoping it could be seen in the dim light of the room "In a way?"
"Yes…I…I have spent so long being held out of time by my Exsphere that it…became routine to me."
"You became used to it?"
Presea's nod was a slight movement – a mere inclination of the head. "But now…" she paused, sounding lost and scared and seeming as though she was having trouble putting her thoughts into words. Shrugging off her blanket, Colette padded softly across the room and sat down at the foot of her companion's bed. Of course, she thought with affection for her friend, since her Keycrest had got the Exsphere under control, time had finally reacquainted itself with the pink haired girl.
"…You're ageing…" Colette finished the sentence for Presea, and her friend swallowed and looked away, eyes shimmering in the moonlight.
"A-affirmative…" she whispered, "…and it scares me. I don't know what I should do about it."
"Hey, it's okay to be afraid." Colette tried another reassuring smile now that she was close enough to be seen, despite the weak light. "I think everyone fears death in some way or another…especially when we think about it. It's normal."
"It…is?" Presea sighed heavily, and flopped down on her back. "I imagine you are correct, but…it is not something I am used to. When I think about it…I feel strange inside. My stomach feels peculiar, and my limbs tremble and…and sometimes I feel cold all over. At times…I have even found myself crying…although I am not sure of the exact cause."
Colette listened for a second, leaning back on the bed. "Um…it's probably just because you're scared Presea…I've been like that before. Thinking about it often makes it worse, yet sometimes I guess we can't help it."
"I see…then that must be why I feel it now while I'm talking to you." She looked down at her shaking hands and sighed again. "I wanted to ask you about it because I estimated you had the greatest experience on the subject…but, I only ever seem to feel this way during the night, alone. It's such an empty, horrible feeling. I wish there was a way to stop it."
"Well, um…" The Chosen thought for a moment, wanting to help her friend, but not sure she was able to. An idea came to her suddenly, causing the blond haired girl to sit up brightly. "…Hey, do you want a hug?"
Presea looked up sharply at Colette and frowned, puzzled. "A hug? I do not understand how close physical contact will alleviate the problem."
"Hmm…" Colette thought back to all the times she felt down, or alone, and how much a hug from a friend cheered her. "…Well, it normally helps me when I'm sad or afraid."
"I see…" Presea seemed to consider this for a few moments, then smiled a little. "A hug. Then…if it's okay…I would like to try this."
"Sure!" Without further words, Colette crawled across the bed and flopped down beside Presea, wrapping her arms protectively around the small girl in an embrace. Her companion seemed to stiffen slightly at the sudden close contact, but after a few moments Presea seemed to relax before hesitantly wrapping her own arms around the blonde haired girl. The pair lay side by side quietly for a while, with just the sound of their breathing punctuating the silence of the room, and as the moments extended into minutes, Colette began to think Presea had fallen asleep. The Chosen didn't mind though, enjoying the cosy warmth the embrace afforded.
"This is…unusual," murmured the pink haired girl then, dispelling Colette's conclusion. "Physical contact should not alleviate mental worries…yet strangely it has."
Colette smiled, resting her forehead against the pink haired girl's. "Heh, I told you that it would make you feel better. Hugs from friends always do."
"…Yes."
The Chosen looked down and saw two small streams of tears glitter silver in the moonlight as they ran from Presea's eyes. She pulled the girl close to her, feeling the dampness touch her cheek as she placed her head beside her friend's.
"Oh hey, hey – it's all right, it's all right! What's the matter?"
"I do not know," Presea hiccuped, and shook her head. "I feel…strange. Undefined sensation."
"It's okay…" Colette whispered, bringing a hand up to dry the small girl's cheeks with her sleeve. Presea was silent for a moment, her breathing ragged with emotion, but eventually turned to look the Chosen in the eyes.
"Colette…when I was under the influence of the exsphere – I had infinite time, but…never had anything to live for. No purpose." She paused, swallowing hard, and took a deep breath. "But now…now I've met people, and you've accepted me as a friend, and I'm having fun and seeing wonderful things. There is so much I desire to do, and people I desire to do it with, yet now my time…is no longer unlimited. It seems…unfair."
"It's okay," Colette whispered, hugging the girl close to her again. "You're not alone there – I think many people feel the way you do." She paused for a second, thinking about how it applied to her own life and laughed without humour. "I grew up knowing that I would have to give up my life for the journey of regeneration, yet now there might actually be another way to save the world, uh, worlds. Suddenly there's this other path for me to take, one where I may actually be able to live, and enjoy life…and grow old."
She felt her throat tighten as she spoke aloud the thoughts she had been thinking for some time, and as she blinked, she realised her eyes were damp with tears of pure, selfish joy. Presea seemed to realise too, and looked a little horrified – misreading Colette's glittering gaze.
"I apologise…" she murmured. "…Are you upset at something I have said?"
"No, not at all," Colette smiled brightly and wiped her eyes. "I'm just happy that I've been given a chance…once this is over…."
"To live a normal life. Yes…" Presea considered the statement and nodded, shifting a little in the blonde haired girl's embrace. "It is a chance…no, a right, that you deserve Colette. I have never encountered anyone as selfless and compassionate as yourself." She smiled sadly and exhaled deeply. "I wish that one day, I can live my life the way you do."
Colette found herself laughing with embarrassment. "Hehe, I've always been this way…I'm just odd." Thinking for a moment, she smiled at her companion. "But if you're planning to then I'll help too."
Presea frowned, "You'll…help?"
"Yeah!" Colette shifted a little and readjusted the embrace. "We've both discovered new limitations on our lives right? So let's work really hard to enjoy every day the best we can and make sure we grow old with no regrets!"
The pink haired girl seemed to think about this for a few moments and nodded. "…O-okay, that would be…cool?"
There was a questioning tone in her voice at the use of the description, and Colette grinned in acknowledgement. "Yeah! It'll be really cool!"
Presea nodded, then smiled bashfully. "I'm sorry. You probably think me foolish."
"No, of course not." Colette hugged the girl close to her again, feeling warmth surge up inside her at being able to help her friend. "Sometimes it helps to talk – remember that."
"Affirmative," replied Presea. "Thank you Colette. I will consider this…and hugs."
