For notes, warnings and disclaimers see chapter 1

Chapter 3: The Reluctant Cat
(Daniel's POV)

Okay, this is getting ridiculous now.

I've been keeping an eye on Sam for a couple of weeks and things are most definitely not getting better, in fact if anything they are getting steadily worse. She is obviously aware that I'm watching her and she's not happy about it... far from it. The problem is that she's so nervous it is actually starting to hurt her performance and I'm worried that it's only a matter of time before Jack figures out that there's something wrong here and that could turn out to be a disaster. Even I can see that.

Yes, I may not be military but I do know enough to know that if she's trying this hard to keep something a secret then the last thing I want to do is to leave her exposed by drawing attention to the situation... the only problem is that I'm not sure she's realized that I know that much. From what I've been able to see so far she is convinced that I'm the enemy and is diverting way too much of her energy toward keeping me at bay... and I do understand.

Even though I know she'll never admit it the fact is that whatever is bothering her has her running scared... and right now I'm contributing to that fear. Needless to say that that was not what I was trying to accomplish here. We are supposed to watch each other's back, if nothing else I've learned that much in these past few months, but unfortunately at times such as this that is easier said than done.

The thing is that right now I'm worried. I want Sam to trust me but she doesn't seem to be particularly inclined to do so and that is bound to cause trouble sooner rather than later... and that is the last thing I want. That means I'm going to have no choice but to take a more aggressive stance here, one that could easily backfire.

I've been thinking about it for a while, trying to put it off for as long as I could, hoping that it wouldn't be necessary but the way I see it I'm fast running out of options. It is apparent that Sam is not going to come to me, even though she knows I'm keeping an eye on her and that means that the only thing I can do right now is to try and push the issue. That is not how I wanted to handle this situation, not by a long shot, but at the same time I know I can't allow this to fester any longer, not if I don't want this situation to snowball and land us both in trouble. I may not be happy about this latest turn of events but I can understand it, the problem is that even though I understand why this next step is necessary that doesn't make it any easier to take. I'm doing what I think has to be done to defuse the situation, that is true, but at the same time I can't stop thinking about the fact that in doing so I may well be jeopardizing my friendship with Sam and I absolutely hate that.

The problem is that the way I see it I have two choices here and neither one of them represents a particularly pleasant scenario: I can either confront her knowing that she's not going to like it or I can let this situation continue to escalate and seeing how that second scenario is definitely not an option the answer to the question of what am I supposed to do now becomes apparent. This is not how I wanted to do this but unfortunately, seeing how there doesn't seem to be a third option available to me, I'm afraid I'm going to have no choice but to take my chances with whatever's behind door number one.

Of course, while the idea of talking to Sam sounds like a simple enough concept in theory, in reality it is anything but. Approaching her is not going to be easy, especially because she's made it abundantly clear that she doesn't want to be approached and that means I'm going to have to play my cards very carefully. With Sam there is no margin for error and I know it. Any little opening I leave for her she is going to identify and exploit in a matter of seconds... and it's not like outsmarting her is a real option.

Okay, you know you've been hanging around the military for too long when you start devising a battle plan to talk to your friends... unfortunately this is one instance in which I'm afraid I'm actually going to need mine.

It's clear that whatever is bothering Sam, she doesn't want to talk about it and getting over that reluctance is not going to be easy. She is not particularly fond of sharing her personal problems at the best of times and on top of that the fact is that she can be incredibly stubborn when she wants to be... and if my suspicions are correct I think it's safe to assume that this is going to be one of those instances in which she will most definitely want to be.

I have been thinking things over for a while, trying to come up with something I could hopefully turn to my advantage, I've been trying to come up with some sort of insight into whatever it is that's going on here beyond the very basics and I think I've finally done it. In the weeks since I first figured out that whatever it was that seemed to be off with our group was connected to Sam I think I've managed to narrow down the number of probable causes significantly. In fact in these past few weeks the whole thing has gone from a nagging feeling in the back of my mind to a situation in which I'm almost certain I know in which mission did this problem originate.

In other words, the good news --if it can be called that-- is that I think I've narrowed down my list of suspects to a single one, to one suspect we really should have realized had caused a lot more damage than we wanted to acknowledge: Turghan. The bad news is that if that's really the source of the problem then she's been keeping it quiet for months now and getting her to open up won't be fun... for either one of us.

Even now, after all these months, the mission to Simarka is one of those that stand out in my mind. That was the world in which we learned a very important lesson: it was the world in which we learned that sometimes the human inhabitants of a planet can be just as dangerous and as deadly as the Goa'uld. We may approach them as friends but even when there are no open hostilities between us, that doesn't necessarily mean that we'll be safe... and cultural misunderstandings can easily turn deadly.

In that regard humans can be even more dangerous than the Goa'uld at times. With the Goa'uld at least we know where we stand. We know they are our enemies and we know to treat them as such but our interaction with other human civilizations is far more complex and far less predictable than that. That interaction forces us to deal with a number of different options and telling what kind of scenario we are walking into is not always easy. That, in a nutshell, is the lesson we learned in Simarka.

Up until that point our friends and enemies had been clearly defined in our minds but what happened there changed all that, it shattered our preconceived notion that humans are 'good' and Goa'uld are 'bad'... okay, the Goa'uld remain clearly set in the 'bad' category but we did learn that humans aren't always as good, friendly or welcoming as we would want them to be. That was something we had never even considered in our excitement at the thought of visiting other worlds, even though we really should have known better, and Simarka was our wake-up call in that regard.

We were so naive going in, so unprepared for what we were about to face, for the impact of cultural differences and we almost ended up having to pay for that ignorance with Sam's life. She was kidnapped, sold and tortured, though the last part we didn't learn until after we had managed to make it back through the gate... maybe that should have taught me something about how stubborn Sam can be when it comes to keeping things she doesn't want others to know, things she perceives as signs of weakness, a secret.

I remember how after we returned from Simarka we were appalled when we discovered that she had been beaten... brutally. It was a revelation that caught us totally off guard, especially considering that she had managed to defeat Turghan in hand to hand combat just a few hours earlier in spite of her injuries. Her back was a mess, crisscrossed by lash marks but she insisted that she was fine, just more than a little sore and even though we were on stand down for almost two weeks to allow her to heal, the fact was that she was basically left to her own devices, especially because, even though she was in a considerable amount of pain, there was little Dr. Warner could do for her at the time. The whip Turghan had used on her had obviously been carefully designed and expertly wielded. It had caused her a lot of pain but it hadn't really inflicted any serious damage. It had just left her with deep and extensive bruising.

We were all worried about her there for a while and General Hammond even suggested that she should get some counseling but she turned him down, insisting that she was fine and he stopped just short of making it an order. To our surprise she seemed to bounce back from that experience in a truly amazing fashion. Even though she was in pain she insisted on going back to her lab almost immediately, losing herself in her work. At first Dr. Warner tried to object, he tried to get her to take a few days off, he argued that she should give herself the time to heal but she dismissed him saying that it would be of no real use. She pointed out that the two positions she was reasonably comfortable in were lying flat on her stomach or standing up and she insisted that she didn't want to spend days on end dwelling on what had happened so she figured she might as well try to get something done while she was out of commission. She promised to take it easy and that was it... only now I'm almost sure it was all an act.

I'm not saying that she was lying about the fact that she could either lie on her stomach or stand up, that part actually makes sense, but somehow I don't think she managed to pull off the bouncing back act as well as she would have had us believe... as well as she got us to believe. If the subtle changes I've seen in her behavior since I've actually been paying attention are anything to go by then she is still having some trouble and the fact is that maybe we should have expected that much. That is the part that's bothering me. We are supposed to be friends, to rely on each other and yet...

I know at least part of the problem has to do with the fact that Simarka was one of our first missions. We are good friends now, we know each other well now, but that wasn't necessarily the case back then. Back then we had been together for less than a month, we didn't really know each other and we were all still trying to figure out where we belonged, how our team was supposed to operate, what were our individual strengths and weaknesses, who were our teammates. I doubt she'd be able to pull something like that off now, in fact I don't think she'd even try, but still that doesn't solve the current problem... and as for what happened in Simarka, as to how much trouble is she still having trying to come to terms with the aftermath of that particular mission, the fact remains that I have more questions than answers. Yes, I have a general idea as to what the source of the problem is and that is better than nothing but I still don't have the first clue as to the specifics of the situation.

Well, I guess the time has come for me to change that... it's time for me to get myself some answers, after all both Jack and Teal'c have left us alone to work on the technology and the inscriptions that are to be found all around us. That means that, barring a really unpleasant and unexpected surprise, they are unlikely to return until the time comes for us to go home. This is the best chance I'm going to get for a while and I know it. We have privacy and Sam is not going anywhere so I might as well get it over with. This may not be the way in which I wanted events to unfold but I know it can't really be avoided, not in the long run anyway and somehow I don't think this is an encounter that would get any easier if I were to put it off any longer.

Author's notes: Okay guys, I wanted to thank you for your reviews, they really help keep me going and the story moving forward. As to when you can expect some answers, well some answers will finally start flowing your way in the next update (and Wendy, you were right, this is at least partially related to "Emancipation").