Disclaimer: If I'm not old enough to own a car in the state of New Jersey, what makes you think I can own a cartoon?

Author's Note: I know, I know, this chapter is ridiculously short. I just wanted to write a little something so Big Daddy can attempt to sort out his thoughts. Actually, both this chapter and the one after it would tie in with Chapter Four quite nicely, but that would mean the story only had five chapters. I did that once, with New Girl, and I swore I'd never do it again.

Now enough with the Author's Note and on with the chapter.

Chapter Five: But Why Did it Have to Be Cosmo?

The first picture in the album was a shot of me, floating infront of the company's billboard. We first opened that day, and I felt like the biggest man in Fairy World. Which is a feeling I never get tired of, but that's beside the point.

Something else great happened that day, too. It didn't turn out so hot in the end, but it was wonderful at the time.

"You must be feeling great right now."

"Oh, yeah. The business is great! But I, uh, I think I'll need a first lady, so to speak."

"You--you mean...?"

"Amalia, will you marry me?"

She said yes, and now all the wedding pictures are ashes. I did save one, though, the one where we're cutting the wedding cake together. I keep it in the glove compartment in one of the trucks, just as a reminder of how things used to be.

I flipped through a few more pictures of the new garbage company, and then I found the shot I wanted to see. Amalia and I were in the hospital; she was holding Blonda, and I had Wanda. Those kids couldn't have looked any happier then. If only I knew what went wrong that made Wanda want to leave me.

Just like her mother did.

There was a picture of that day a few pages over. The girls, about the age to be in elementary school, were sitting on the front steps of our house; one looked pretty upset, and the other smiling optimistically. I remember everything so clearly...

"I can use this pain to my advantage! When I get on a soap opera, it'll be great motivation!"

"Could you at least try to care?"

"Shut up, pink head!"

"You shut up, talentless jerk!"

"Hey, girls! Calm down, would you? I can't think with all this noise!"

"Fine! My stories are coming on in a few minutes anyway. I'd better go inside."

"Sorry, Daddy."

"Nah, it's all right, Sweetheart."

"Is Mommy really gone?"

"Y--Yeah, I think she is."

"Oh…Will—Will you ever leave me, Daddy?"

As soon as I saw those big pink eyes look up at me, I just melted. I swore to Wanda I'd never leave her, and here she was tossing me like a bad tomato. It was like everything I did for her didn't matter anymore.

Well, I guess I could be over reacting. And I did always see this day coming. I remember one time I happened to walk by the girls' room…

"Isn't this great! Romeo and Juliet is one of the best love stories ever, and I, Blonda, get the leading role!"

"You don't even know what love is."

"And you do, Miss I'veNeverBeenOnADateInMyLife?"

"Of course I do! I've been gathering information ever since Mom left."

"Mom left Dad because she was a jerk, that's all there is to it!"

"It's more than that, Blonda. They didn't love each other, and that's why it didn't work out."

I didn't think much of it at the time. I thought Wanda was just a teenage girl that got too caught up in her romance novels. But the more I think about it now, the more sense it makes. I know Wanda is making the right decision here, there's no doubt about that.

But why did it have to be Cosmo? Can I trust him to keep her safe? Can I be sure he won't hurt my little angel the way Amalia hurt me?

I couldn't stand to see that. She'd definitely cry, and I hate it when Wanda cries. She never got sad; she'd just get angry, so seeing her cry means that she really just can't take it anymore. And when Wanda feels like that, it throws off everything.

Of course, she doesn't need me to care about her anymore. It'll be Cosmo who's hugging her, and Cosmo telling her that everything'll be all right. Every hour I spend worrying about her is just going to go to waste, because somehow that green haired jerk is going to top it.

And what if Wanda gets even stupider and decides to have a family of her own? Then all of us are going to be discarded like a bad Poker hand. That would hurt even worse.

"She wouldn't do that," I thought. "She's smarter than that."

I suddenly thought back to what Piero said to me just hours ago.

"I understand, but why can't you give the boy more of a chance? I know, I'm skeptical about it, too. That's why I sent you to Celia. But have faith in Wanda's judgement and let her hate me, instead. She needs you to be Daddy right now."

"I can't do that," I said to myself. "She's too young."

She could be confused about all this love business. This whole thing could just be her mind playing tricks on her.

But the more I thought about it, the more I thought it was just a bunch of crappy excuses. Wanda's ready to do this, so I should be to.

And then Wanda showed up in my office, red-eyed and angry, and my mind changed right back.