Title: Visuals

Author: PissedoffEskimo

Pairing: HP/GW; HP/some random fifth-year

Rated: R

Warning: mild-het, slash, mentions of blow jobs and masturbation, and...:sigh: a moderately happy ending (hangs head in shame)

Disclaimer: The characters found within are property of J.K. Rowling and Warner Brothers, the sentence which inspired it can be found on livejournal, in the babbchroniclesdated 3-4-2005, the happy ending, however, is being chalked up to momentary insanity. Enjoy it while it lasts.

Summary: "Harry looked at her funny, and then leaned in and kissed her squire on the lips."

Author's Note: So, I read live journal (that's right, don't judge) and I especially love the read McTabby's Summary Executions and recently babbchronicles, which takes Summary Executions one step further and gives us a look at what's inside the fic. Sometimes, it might not be the entire fic that is so horrible, but one single word that changes the entire meaning of a sentence. One such example inspired this ficlet.

Gay (gay) adj. (gayer, gayest) 1. light-hearted and cheerful, happy and full of fun. 2. bright colored, dressed or decorated in bright colors

Harry had a problem. He was gay. That in itself wasn't what was wrong, it just started to get complicated when he factored in the fact that he had a girlfriend. No, that wasn't even the real problem. The real problem was that said girlfriend was Ginny Weasley and that, like her mother, she had a bit of a temper. That and she sometimes wasn't the brightest of the Weasleys. Like, just last month - he had been sitting in front of the fire in the commons room, talking to Seamus about blow-jobs when Ginny had over heard them and asked what a blow-job was. After several attempts at explaining it, he'd finally given in and demonstrated what he'd meant on Seamus. It seemed that sometimes with Ginny, visual was the only thing she understood.

Of course, that particular incident was the one that had made him start thinking that perhaps he might be gay. It hadn't been passionate; in fact, it had been rather clinical (Ginny had been watching and he'd kept having to stop what he was doing to explain things) but afterwards, he'd gotten to thinking about it and then he'd gotten to masturbating about it and the more he thought and masturbated, the more he realized he'd never once spent this much time on anything he and Ginny had done. After three weeks agonizing over 'might be,' he'd decided to do some experimenting.

Ron had been the first person to come to mind, but Ron was like a brother and anything they did would probably just remind him of Ginny. Eventually, he'd gone with Seamus. Mostly because he'd already put the boy's cock in his mouth, so his tongue probably couldn't hurt anything. Kissing had quickly led to groping, which led to heavier kissing, which led to more blow-jobs, and Seamus putting a finger somewhere Harry hadn't ever thought to put one before, but had liked very much. Overall, it was a successful experiment, one that decided once and for all that he was indeed gay. Now, however, he had to tell Ginny.

He'd thought to tell her on a Saturday morning, that way if she turned out to be as emotional about the whole thing, as he'd seen other girls do, then she'd have the rest of weekend to get herself together. Despite his resolve, however, he did think that perhaps today wasn't the best day he could have chosen. Dumbledore had recently decided that the students needed a distraction from the war; something fun, something that wasn't likely to remind them that Voldemort was breathing down the necks of half their families, something... muggle. In a stroke of what Harry was sure the old man thought was brilliance, he'd planned a muggle Renaissance fair to promote goodwill and understanding towards muggles. Not that Harry had anything against muggles, but he did have it out for anything that gave Ginny Weasley a sword on the day he'd promised himself he'd break up with her.

Looking across the fair ground he spotting Ginny trudging toward him in her armor, a scrawny fifth-year dragging her sword with him. A cute, scrawny fifth-year, actually, dragging a very large, heavy looking sword that he knew for a fact Ginny could use. Damn.

Before he could duck out of sight, however, she'd spotted him. "Harry, over here!"

He sighed to himself. Well, now or never. Walking up to meet her, he gave her an awkward hug over the thickly plated armor and stepped back, just out of arms reach. Looking at the squire, he saw the boy staring back at him with adoring eyes. Oh, just great, another Boy-Who-Lived worshiper.

"Um, Ginny, can we talk alone?"

She looked up from the buckle she'd been tightening and shrugged. "Anything you have to say you can say in front of my..." she looked sideways at the boy for a moment, "...squire." She chuckled. "Besides, he has my sword and I'm competing in only ten minutes. You know, I beginning to think my father has gone too far on this one. Not only does he insist his only daughter compete in a muggle sword fighting contest, but he also insists I wear a full suit of armor. It's hardly necessary, the swords are charmed not to do damage and none of the other girls are wearing armor. It's embarrassing, it's completely unflattering, it's..."

"Ginny!" Harry bit his lip. He hated to snap at her, but when Ginny got started on something, it was very difficult to see the end in sight and if he were going to do this, it would have to be now. "I think we should break up, because... I'm gay."

She gaped for a moment, then her cheeks began to turn pink and Harry took a step back, wondering if the armor would slow her down enough for him to get away. "You're happy? You're breaking up with me because you're happy!"

Oh, for the love of...! He looked at her funny, and then leaned in and kissed her squire on the lips.

Ginny's mouth hung open in shock. "Harry!"

He held up a finger and made a funny little moaning noise that she couldn't rightly remember him ever having made when they'd kissed and... was that tongue! "Harry?"

When he finally pulled away, the poor squire seemed to have gone into shock. Harry looked at her purposefully. "In the muggle world, gay is a term used to define a man who prefers his own gender. I like men, Ginny."

"You could have just told me that instead of... of... molesting my squire! Look at him, Harry, he can't even stand straight. How is he supposed to carry my sword onto the field for me now?"

Harry looked exasperated, as if the answer was quite obvious. "Remember fourth year?"

"Of course."

"Remember how I made a comment about tossing off and you followed me around for five days until I gave up trying to explain it and just showed you what I meant?"

"Harry, I was just trying to get you naked! I have six older bothers, I'd have to be a bit daft not to know what tossing off meant. I thought you'd figured that out by now."

Harry looked down. "Oh... oh! Well, that explains a lot."

She nodded. "Yes."

He looked up suddenly. "The blow-job?"

She nodded again. "Yes, 'fraid so."

"You knew then?"

"Suspected."

He bit his lip and turned his attention to the still stunned fifth year, hunched over, trying to hide his very obvious problem. "Ginny, mind if I borrow your squire?"

She glanced at him and sighed. "Oh, go on then." She cast a lightening charm on her sword as she watched them walk off. Damn, she'd have to find another squire.

the end