Disclaimer: I don't own Hamtaro. If I did I…WELL YOU GET THE IDEA! I DON'T OWN IT! However I don't own some of the "movies" mentioned in here. The "movies" belong to the authors: Katy-chan (of course her. Ravens, me, and rest are dedicating this fic to her.), Ravens, MitsukaiWilliam, and Aeroshamu. I own the MoL series, which are gonna be mentioned as well, and the actual movie shown here (which hasn't even been written at all so don't write this off as an MST yet!)

Chapter 3:Coming to a Theater Near You

Maxwell and Sandy were once again on the road. They had just gotten back from the gas station, where they had been cleaning themselves up after the big food fight at Chef Ham's restaurant. Maxwell was now blushing furiously as the past events replayed in his mind.

That was sure weird... I mean the argument with the waiter and his girlham, the food fight…and… Maxwell started to really blush as he lifted his paw up to his cheek. I almost thought she was going to kiss me… But instead, she ended up licking my cheek. Man, I was really hoping for a kiss… CURSE THAT JELLY ON MY CHEEK! But then again…it didn't feel all that bad... I mean, sure it wasn't a kiss, but it felt surprisingly good…after awhile, that is. He then looked at Sandy. Her fur ruffled in the air, her face smiling as they headed down the road. Maxwell couldn't help but smile too. At least she's happy. That's what really matters. However, one day, I wanna show her that we're much more than friends. Maybe even more than just being boy-ham and girl-ham, if there even is such a thing. Hopefully we'll be closer after this day. But something doesn't feel right…something's missing. All of a sudden…

Maxwell started to really blush as he lifted his paw up to his cheek. He then looked at Sandy. Her fur ruffled in the air, her face smiling as they headed down the road. Maxwell couldn't help but smile too. All of a sudden…

"MAXWELL WATCH OUT!" Maxwell then snapped out of his trance and noticed a truck coming at him. He quickly moved to the other side and evaded a critical accident. Sandy was now a little peeved. "You idiot! Stop blanking out and pay attention to the road before you get us hurt!"

"Oh, I'm so sorry Sandy! I guess I was lost in my thoughts." Maxwell apologized. He then switched his attention to the road so as not to get in anyone else's way. I guess I should just pay attention to the road. I don't want the next destination of our date to be the hospital. I should quit worrying. As long as I'm here with my girl-ham, everything'll be alright.

Sandy just looked at Maxwell and shook her head. That idiot! He could've gotten us killed. I wonder what he was thinking about. Probably that lick on the cheek I gave him. Sandy giggled to herself. I should try that more often…when he's not behind the wheel, that is. But did I see him pucker up his lips before I licked him? So he was expecting a kiss. Sandy then blushed a bright red color after "altering" the lick scene a bit in her mind. Oh, I'm, like, so embarrassed just thinking about it. I hope one day we do have that one passionate kiss and then be closer than ever. It's what I've been dreaming about for a long time. But you know…there was a weird sound coming from the back on our way here. Maybe Panda didn't fix it up as much as I thought. But now it's gone. So that's what made Clio jump. Maybe Frederico fixed it up when he checked on it. Sandy then just continued to look at Maxwell and smile as they headed down the road.

Back at the restaurant however…

"Uh, Mr. Tiger stripes…" said one girl ham. "Can you…maybe…let go of my paw?"

"Sorry Gorgeous, but my paw has a mind of it's own." Stan said, keeping his grip on the girlham's paw. "C'mon ladies, step right up! You have one hot boyham here for the takin'! Come now and maybe we can…HEKE!" He then looked at the parking lot, only to notice that Maxwell and Sandy were now gone. "OH MAN, I MISSED 'EM!" He then released the girlham trying to chase after the car.

"Hmph! The nerve of some boys…" The girl-ham muttered as she stomped away.

Stan looked at the road, hoping to find a trace of the car, but he couldn't find it. Just when he thought it was impossible to catch up to them, he saw something.

"Yo, Mister, I'm gonna hafta use this motorcycle! It's an emergency!" Stan said as he ran up to a ham and flashed his wallet with a couple of pictures of him and Sandy when they were younger. "I'm a brother!" He then pushed the ham of his motorcycle and started it up in hopes to find Maxwell and Sandy. Well what do you know, it's working. Maybe I should play Grand Theft Piggies: Ham-Ham Land more often.

"Um…Maxwell," Sandy began as they continued down the road. "Where are we going now?"

"Hmmm…good question." Maxwell began to think. Apparently, he really didn't prepare for this at all. Then an idea popped into his head. "Oh I know, how 'bout a movie? There's a nearby movie theater that's been showing some really good movies lately."

Sandy's eyes shone with excitement. "Yeah, like, let's go!"

Maxwell smiled and headed towards the nearby movie theater.

Closing in, however, was Stan on the motorcycle. "Good. I finally caught up to them. Now to find out where they're going. Hmmmmm…it looks like they're heading toward…the movie theater!. I'll just hafta beat them there!" Stan jumped right off the motorcycle and used his skateboarding skills to take a quicker route to the movie theater. Little did he know…

"How long until we get to the carnival, Howdy? My paws are killing me…" Dexter said, walking sluggishly. Howdy, however, was a bit more energetic.

"Aw, c'mon, partner!" Howdy exclaimed. "We're supposed to be the ham-ham rangers, not the evil putty-putty ham-hams!"

"I knew I smelled diamonds of sugar from Howdy this morning…" Dexter said to himself. "Note to self, proclaim that diamonds of sugar are ev--AAH!" Dexter was cut off as the motorcycle crashed right into him and kept going.

"Who's the smart one now!" Howdy yelled at Dexter. "Yer not supposed to ride on the horse's nose! You're supposed to ride on it's back!" Howdy then jumped up on the motorcycle and rode it all the way to the carnival. "YEEHAW! Now THIS is the best way to travel!" Dexter muttered to himself to never let Howdy eat diamonds of sugar ever again.

At last, the couple had finally reached the movie theater.

"Wow, it sure is crowded." Sandy pointed out. Apparently there were several movies debuting today, so, of course, the movie theater was packed.

"Not again…" Maxwell sighed. Already he was experiencing the restaurant problem all over again.

"Oh don't worry, Maxy," Sandy reassured her boyham. "I'm sure we'll find a better seat this time. There, like, might be a movie I wanna see that not many of the hamhams are going to. After all, a lot of them seem to be going to only three of the movies."

"Which movies?" As if someone heard him, Maxwell heard many of the gossip going around lately. He watched as a little boyham who looked like he dyed his fur white started swinging around a fake sword.

"Take that! And that!" the boyham said, waving the sword around playfully. "Mitsukai William is the greatest fighter in the whole world!"

"Ha! Yeah right!" said another who most likely dipped his paws in blue ink. "It's Keith who'll beat 'em all!"

"You're both wrong!" said one who looked a lot like Hamtaro. "Hamtaro is more powerful than any ham ham!"

"Oh yeah!" All said in unison.

"Hamtaro, William, Keith…?" Maxwell said with a puzzled look on his face.

"They're talkin' about the Mission of Love and Hamster X series." said a familiar voice.

Sandy turned around and recognized the ham ham. "Hey, it's Boss! Like, what are you doing here?"

"Well…I…" Boss started as he began to blush. "I…promised to take Bijou…and Hamtaro out today."

"And Hamtaro?" Maxwell was again puzzled.

"Well you see…when I asked her out…" Boss began. "Hamtaro all of sudden came in and…here we are. Speaking of which…they're late. Where could they be?"

"Sorry we're late!" The three of them turned around to see Hamtaro and Bijou running up to them. "Sorry Boss, but Dexter got hit by a motorcycle on our way here."

"A motorcycle?" All three said in unison.

"Oui," Bijou continued. "He said it came out of nowhere and crashed into him."

"That's, like, totally weird." Sandy replied.

"Oui." Bijou then noticed Sandy and Maxwell together. "Oh, are you two going on a date?" She saw the two of them begin to blush, and couldn't help but crack a smile. "You do not need to answer. I can read the red on your faces."

"Oh, I know!" Maxwell finally spoke up. "How about we all go to the same movie?"

"Yeah," Hamtaro replied. "That'd be hamtastic!"

Boss sighed sadly. All I wanted was some time alone with Bijou…

"So which movie are we going to see?" Bijou asked, looking at the choices.

"Definitely not Mission of Love 2 and William's Legacy," Sandy commented. "Those two are, like, so packed with kids. And I'm not really in the mood for action today either."

"So that leaves out The Great Ice Age too…" Hamtaro added. They looked through all the choices available. Winter Wish, Say That You Love Me 1 and 2, Mission of Love 1-6, and even Sandy's favorite one, Twirling Whirling, were already sold out.

Meanwhile inside the movie theater a ham ham was running down the aisle looking for any trace of Sandy and Maxwell.

"It's so hard to find them in this crowd!" Stan muttered to himself as he caught his breath. He had snuck in and searched the entire movie theater. However he had no luck finding either Sandy or Maxwell. Hmmmmm…maybe if I sneak into the control room, I can check the monitors. But there's no way I'd be able to get past all those guards!…unless… A mischievous look formed on Stan's face. He had a plan.

"Oh! That one! Like, over there!" Sandy pointed to the title of a movie.

"I heard that was a really good one." Boss said with a big grin on his face.

"Are you sure has nothing to do with it having your name in the title, Boss?" Maxwell asked, grinning. Boss sweat dropped.

"Of course not!" Boss replied, glaring at Maxwell.

"Calm down, Boss, it was just a joke!" Maxwell said shakily, sweating a bit. He cleared his throat and began speaking in his usual tone. "You know, some of us should get snacks while the rest of us find a seat."

"Good idea, Maxwell. I'll go in with Bijou and find a seat for everyone." Boss started for the theater. However, Bijou stopped.

"What's the matter, Bijou?" Boss said. Oh man, she's not gonna back out or something, is she!

"Boss, Maxwell and Sandy are on their first date. This is a special day for them. I think we should make them comfortable by going and getting the snacks ourselves." she said.

"Oh, it's no trouble, Bijou, we don't mind getting the snacks." Maxwell said.

"Bijou's right, we'll go get the snacks for ya!" Hamtaro said enthusiastically.

"Are you, like, sure? 'Cause it really doesn't matter to us." Sandy said.

"No, no, they're right, it's your big night. We'll go get 'em." Boss said.

"Oui, you two go ahead." Bijou said, smiling.

Boss thought a bit. Hey, maybe this is my chance to impress her by showing her what a gentleman I am! His eyes lit up as he spoke. "Hey, Bijou, why don't you go ahead too? I can get the snacks by myself!"

"Oh, Boss, how thoughtful!" Bijou said, her smile widening.

"Really, Boss? You'll go get the snacks for us?" Hamtaro said, smiling as well.

"Sure, it's no proble--" Boss's grin suddenly disappeared as his face began to look a little nervous. Wait…Th-that would mean leaving Ha-Hamtaro and Bijou…seated next to each other…in the dark, where it's hard to see… A grin returned to Boss's face, but it looked a bit more nervous than pride-stricken. "Eh…heh hehehe! O-on second though, Hamtaro, y-you'd better come with me!" Boss stuttered, grabbing Hamtaro and heading towards the snack counter.

"Heke? Uh…Sure, Boss, but why?" Hamtaro asked.

"Err, um, because, uh, I…am gonna need help carryin' all the snacks!"

"O-okay, Boss-man."

Sandy, Maxwell, and Bijou blinked, and just stared awkwardly for a second as Hamtaro and Boss walked off. Then Bijou broke the silence by saying, "Well, shall we go?"

The three of them walked into the big screen room and huddled over to the fourth row. Meanwhile, in the back, Stan, who was still wearing the brown "disguise", fastened a bowtie onto himself. "Okay… First, to see where they're sitting." He squinted and looked around, seeing a few ham-hams, but had a hard time deciphering which ones were Sandy and Maxwell. Man… This stupid darkness is making it really hard to see… Ugh, but I CAN'T let 'em slip away now! Everyone knows that the movie theater is one of the easiest places to make passes… and… Gahh, I just can't let that happen to Sandy! She's not ready!

Meanwhile, the pre-preview slideshow played on the big screen, while Maxwell, Sandy, and Bijou engaged in some quiet conversation.

"I am so excited! I have never seen an American movie!" Bijou said. "What is the movie called again? I cannot remember the title very well, because I have never heard of it before."

"The movie's called Boss Almighty, but I don't have a clue what it's about. I hope it's good. Do you know what it's about, Maxy?" said Sandy.

"Oh, it looks great from what I've heard! See, it's about this ham who's having a tough time in life, and he feel's like nothing's going right for him. So he blames it all on--" Maxwell cut himself off and began sniffing a bit. "Say, do you girls smell…" He sniffed again, but then started coughing a bit loudly. "…cigarettes?" He said, as he began to cough some more.

"Heke?" Sandy said. "What are you talking abo--" Sure enough, Sandy was cut off by coughing as well. "Like, gross!" She said, as she coughed a bit louder.

Bijou looked a bit confused, but soon the cigarette fumes caused her to begin coughing too. "Oh, how putrid!" she moaned, continuing to cough.

"But where's it coming from? There's, like, no smoking allowed in the theater." Sandy pondered.

Maxwell turned around in his seat and saw the source of the cigarette smoke. "Um, girls?"

"What is it, Maxwell?" Bijou asked, turning around to face the same way. "Oh dear…"

Sandy turned around too and saw three big-looking ham-hams smoking cigarettes. "Like, totally disgusting. They're smoking and breaking the theater's rules!" she said.

"How unethical!" Maxwell said, a bit annoyed.

Sandy coughed again. "They're, like, gonna turn my lungs black!"

Bijou coughed as well. "They are going to turn my coat yellow!"

"Maxwell, do something!" they both said unanimously.

"Heke!" Maxwell said, a bit shocked.

"C'mon, Maxy, we won't be able to enjoy the movie if we can't breathe!" Sandy said.

"Maxwell, she is right. Something must be done about those rude boys!" Bijou said in agreement.

Maxwell sighed. "I can't make them stop…" He looked around, a bit nervous, knowing he was disappointing Sandy. Then, suddenly he saw a ham in a bowtie. "Hey, there's an usher over there! I'll just go and get him to take care of them for us." he said as he got up and walked over to Stan.

Stan sighed, not seeing Maxwell walking towards him. "Man, where the f--"

"Excuse me, sir!" Maxwell said, interrupting Stan's thinking out loud.

"He-heke! Er… ahem, what can I do for you?" Stan said, clearing his throat and deepening his voice. There he is! Finally! But what does he want? And where the heke is Sandy!

Hm, that's weird, this guy looks a lot like Frederico…Gah, focus, Maxwell, focus! "Uh, well, y'see, I, uh… I'm sitting over in that row over there… But there's a group of ham-hams who are smoking, and it's really bothering us. And, y'know, since smoking is against your rules, I think… it should be, um… taken care of. So, would y'mind helping us out?"

Stan was actually pretty happy that Maxwell had called on him for this task. Oh man, he really thinks I'm an usher! Hah, yes! That means my disguise is working, and no one'll ever notice a thing! "Of course. Would you mind showing me where these smokers are sitting, please?" he said, being sure to mind his manners.

"Over here, this way," Maxwell said, walking down the theater aisle. He walked over to the three smokers and pointed. "Right here, sir, here they are." They looked over at him, each with dirty looks on their faces.

Stan saw how big they all were, and started to sweat. He swallowed hard, then slowly made his way over to them, while Maxwell made his way back to his seat.

"Is it, like, being taken care of?" Sandy asked.

"Yeah, that usher back there is taking care of it right now." he replied.

Sandy and Bijou turned around and looked at Stan and the smokers. Maxwell sighed and decided he might as well turn around too, just to see what was going on.

"You got somethin' to say to me, little man?" the ham-ham closest to Stan said.

"Uh, um, eh… Y-you know, smoking is against our rules, so, uh, I'm gonna have to ask you to--" Stan was cut off by one of them blowing smoke in his face. He coughed roughly.

"Ask me to what, buster?" the grey one asked, sticking the cigarette back in his mouth.

Stan coughed a bit more, then spoke up. "Uh, ask you to putt your cigarettes out and throw 'em away."

"And if we don't?" the black one said in a deep voice.

Stan cleared his voice and spoke a bit more deeply. "Then I'll have to ask you to leave the cinema."

The grey one stood up. "You gonna make me, buddy?"

Stan's ears folded back and he began to sweat. "Um, er, well, I, uh… I don't wanna f-fight, sir, I… I'm just tryin' to do my job."

The grey smoker just stood there, looking angrier every time Stan uttered a word. He let out a bit of a growl, and Stan swallowed hard.

Bijou, however, wasn't the least bit scared. She was actually more annoyed at the manners of the trio. I cannot sit back and watch this anymore… I must teach those awful smokers their manners! She waved and called out, "Yoo-hoo!"

Stan's ears perked up and he looked over toward her. W-what the--! Bijou? What's she doing here! …Though, she is lookin' awfully cute tonight…Stan shook his head a bit and spoke. "Y-yes, can I help you, Ma'am?"

"Rudeness like that should not be tolerated, especially from characters such as them!" Bijou called, pointing to the rule breakers. She walked towards Stan and held up a fist. "Violence is not encouraged where I'm from, but if absolutely necessary, this may have to be handled physically! You tried to reason with these boys, but they would not listen. Now, you must teach them a lesson!"

"H-how would I do that?"

"You hit them for being smart with you! Do what the ushers back in France do! Use your flashlight!" she exclaimed.

"But I don't have a fla--"

Bijou cut Stan off and handed him a flashlight.

"Er…" Stan looked back at Bijou, who was smiling sweetly as if this were just her usual routine at the clubhouse, then decided to be a real man, while still playing his role as a brother. A grin stretched across his face. "Hmm, well since you asked so nicely… Alright, Gorgeous!" He held the flashlight up over his head…

"Hyah!"

He tapped it between the eyes of the grey smoker, making an almost inaudible thud-noise…

"AHHH!"

…And, surely enough, was greeted in return by a fist in his face, being sent flying out of the theater.

"Oh no… We gotta get outta here…" Maxwell moaned softly.

"Maxy, do something!" Sandy said, looking up at Maxwell.

"But I--" Maxwell stopped and knew that Sandy was counting on him. "A-alright…" He walked over to the grey-furred ham-ham and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Eh?" he grunted, turning around to see Maxwell.

Maxwell cleared his throat and spoke up. "Sir, I'm sorry for causing all this trouble. I should have just come to you myself instead of making such a ruckus."

He didn't look as if he cared a bit. He just snorted and kept a straight face.

"Erm… But you see, smoking is against the theater rules--"

"I smoke. You got a problem with it? Stay home!" he said, shoving Maxwell a bit.

Maxwell tripped back a bit, but stood back up. "But sir, you don't understand… You're not supposed to be smoking, not to mention it bothers the two girls I'm with, and--"

"Ohh, TWO girls, he? You some kinda player, buddy? Think that gives ya the right to tell me what to do?" the smoker continued, stomping towards Maxwell.

"W-well, y-you….No!" He put his hand on Sandy's shoulder and continued speaking. "She happens to be my girlfriend! The other is just a friend who happens to be seeing the same movie! Right girls?"

"Like, yeah!" Sandy said in a strong voice.

"Oui!" Bijou said, glaring at the smoker.

"Heh, well, since she's your girl, hows about I just, eh," he said, walking over to Bijou. "Have my ways with this lil' chick here?" He chuckled and snorted a bit more.

Bijou's eyes sparked with fury. Steam appeared to be flowing out of her ears, until she finally yelled "THAT IS IT! I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR RUDE BEHAVIOR!" and picked up the flashlight, then smacked it across his face. He fell over, moaning in pain.

Bijou panted heavily. Maxwell and Sandy just stood there, awe-stricken, not knowing what to say. The other two smokers looked terrified and decided to make an exit.

"Bijou…" Sandy said, her jaw still low.

Bijou took a deep breath and said, "We had sent an usher, and he did not listen. Maxwell tried to talk to him, and he still did not listen. I never tolerated rudeness back in France, and I do not see why it should be tolerated here."

Maxwell and Sandy looked at each other awkwardly, then back at Bijou.

Bijou smiled sweetly. "Now then, let us get back to our seats!"

"Uh…" Sandy leaned over to Maxwell and whispered into his ear. "I, like, think we better go ahead and find somewhere else to continue our date, Maxy."

"Bijou, actually, I think we're gonna go ahead and skip the movie. We'll see you guys some other time, okay?" Maxwell said a bit sheepishly. Sandy just nodded to what he was saying.

"Oh? Well, alright, I hope you two have a good time." Bijou said.

"Thanks, Bijou, you too. Bye-Q!" Maxwell said as he waved, then took Sandy's hand and walked out the door.

Bijou sighed. The movie was about to start, so she sat down. Moments later, Hamtaro and Boss came and sat beside her, carrying a pile of treats.

"Here, Bijou! I thought ya might like this!" Hamtaro said, passing her the bag of popcorn.

"Oh dear, Hamtaro, I cannot eat this, it always gets stuck in my teeth!" Bijou said.

Hamtaro sweatdropped and looked a bit disappointed.

Boss chuckled and knew it was his time to shine. "Here ya go, Bijou!" he said proudly, handing her a box of bon-bons. "I know that these are from France, so I figured you'd love them!"

Bijou identified the box. "Oh yes, bon-bons from back home! I remember these…"

Boss was beaming, until she continued her sentence.

"…I never liked them much."

Boss faceplanted right onto the theater floor. He whimpered a bit as he struggled to get back up.

"Shh, Boss, it's starting!" Hamtaro said.

Meanwhile, Stan, who had landed in an alley (located so conveniently near the spot where Maxwell had parked), rubbed his head and stood up. "Ah, man… Geez…" He tore off the bowtie and threw it to the ground. "That's it, no more dress-up. From now on, I'm goin' in camouflage… ugh…" he moaned and walked over to the sidewalk Maxwell and Sandy were nearing, so he panicked and jumped into the trunk.

"I don't believe this… I just don't believe it! Everything we've tried to do has come out as a complete disaster!" Maxwell said, throwing his paws up in frustration.

"Hey, like, don't worry so much, Maxy. You're doing the best you can, and that's enough for me." Sandy said, tugging on one of his arms and smiling warmly. "You know, maybe we're going a bit too fancy. Let's try something more, like, traditional. We could go to the mall or something instead."

"Hmm… I guess so, but I dunno, shopping doesn't seem like much of a date thing, y'know?" he replied.

"There's more than shopping there, Maxy. I heard they have a really nice arcade, you know."

What is she thinking? I'm no good at video games! …But then again, it's not like things can get much worse… and there's nowhere else to go, really… I guess we may as well give it a shot. "Yeah… Alright, Sandy." he said, as he unlocked the car and climbed in.

As they drove down the road, Stan, in the back of the trunk, had been listening to their conversation. The arcade, huh? Guess I better think of a way to blend in there without being suspicious…