Hello out there, if anyone's there. This is my one and only oneshot. I thought I'd take a try at it. It's sort of AU and not very well written but I thought I'd write it before I go away.
P.S. When I come back I promise to update my other stories, if there's any readers of them listening.
Goodbye James Potter
James Potter, resident Marauder and Hogwarts Head Boy took a gulp of pumpkin juice and picked up his letter.
He opened it carelessly and scanned the words, taking another sip of juice.
Suddenly his eyes did a double take and he spat out his drink.
"What?" He stood up suddenly. "This can't be! They can't do this to me!"
"What Prongs?" James looked down at him with blazing eyes.
"Read for yourself." He threw the letter at his best friend, Sirius Black, and stormed out of the hall.
Sirius scanned the letter and stood up abruptly. "Damn!" He cursed, and followed his friend out.
Lily Evans watched the scene curiously.
I wonder what that was about.
!-!-!-!
"Did you hear?"
"What?"
"James Potter! He's moving"
"He can't be!"
"But he is. I heard his parents got relocated. They're moving the whole family to America."
"But they can't take him away! Can't he just stay here?"
"He can't. His father has ordered he come with. No one disobeys Mr Potter."
Lily listened to the conversation with interest and felt a pang at her heart. Potter had become a lot nicer this year. A lot more tolerable. It would be a shame to have to train a new head boy.
She turned as there was a loud bang coming from the boys' dorm.
"You can't go!" Sirius yelled.
"I have to!" James cried.
"You won't even try and stop it! You won't even try for our friendship!" Sirius yelled.
James stomped downstairs and Sirius followed behind, grabbing his arm.
"You don't understand what my father is like." James growled.
"You can fight him." Sirius said sternly. James looked around and for an instant his eyes were linked with the gaze of Lily Evans. He looked away and took a deep breath.
"No, I can't." James said softly, and with that he left.
Lily felt a strange feeling in her stomach and closed her eyes tightly. Abruptly she stood up and walked it off. She couldn't care if James was leaving. She couldn't care about the boy who constantly pestered her to go out with him. She wouldn't let herself.
!-!-!-!
James sat against a tree and looked out onto the lake, with a dejected look on his face.
He held his head in his hands and thought over his time at Hogwarts, which would soon be over. He remembered his first class at school and his first detention. He remembered meeting his friends. His friends. Sirius was right, he knew. He should fight to stay, but he couldn't. He just couldn't. He recalled the first time he and his friends truly met.
flashback
"Did you see the look on her face?" Sirius laughed. The two first years had just come back from pranking little Lily Evans.
"She looked like she was going to explode." A noise stopped their laughter.
"Do you hear that?" Sirius asked.
"Yeah. What is it?" The two rounded the corner to see two second year Slytherins bothering a podgy boy in Gryffindor robes.
"Stop it." They heard a voice. A pale, sandy haired first year stood before the boys.
"Why would we do that?" A Slytherin sneered.
"Because…because…" He stumbled on his words a little.
"Because if you don't WE will make you." James yelled. "I know some pretty powerful magic."
"Forget that. I'll punch you right in the face." Sirius cried.
"Look, just get lost!" The Slytherin spat. "What can a few firsties do to us?"
The sandy haired boy took a book and bashed him over the head as Sirius charged at the other boy. James jumped on the first Slytherin and they all let out various war cries.
When the Slytherins had been successfully concurred the four boys scrambled away laughing.
"Thanks for that." The podgy boy said, regaining his breath. "I'm Peter Pettigrew." He smiled.
"James Potter." James grinned.
"Sirius Black." Sirius did a mock bow.
"Remus Lupin." The sandy haired boy beamed.
"How about you blokes come and eat lunch with us?" James asked. "You can help us think up some pranks for this red haired girl."
The four laughed and went on to create a great prank for the unsuspecting girl.
end flashback
James knew he'd never find better friends. They had stuck together through it all. Through the fights, the pranks, the girl troubles.
When Sirius had been kicked out, they stuck together, moving him in with James until he received an inheritance and moved out. When James had almost been kicked off the Quidditch team for poor grades they stuck together, staying up with him to study all night. When Peter had been bullied numerous times they stuck together, punishing the evil villains. When they had discovered Remus was a werewolf they still together, becoming animagus to help their friend. They were truly the best friends he could ask for. A happy memory floated to his mind.
flashback
"We did it!" Sirius yelled as he transformed back from his dog form.
"Yes!" Peter smiled triumphantly.
"I can't believe you guys did this for me." Remus smiled widely, on the brink of tears. "You're great friends."
"Don't mention it." James laughed. "I like being a stag anyway. So majestic."
"Whatever mate." Sirius scoffed. "Now for the nicknames."
"What about Newtbrain?" Peter asked.
"No way, Peter. Sometimes you have to be careful when selecting a new name for yourself. For instance, let's say you have chosen the nickname 'Fly Head.'" Sirius explained. James snorted at the name but Sirius continued. "Normally you would think that 'Fly Head' would mean a person who has beautiful swept-back features, as if flying through the air. But think again. Couldn't it also mean 'having a head like a fly'? I'm afraid some people might actually think that."
The other three boys just stared at him before bursting out laughing.
"Sirius, mate, I love you, but sometimes you're a little odd." James slung his arm around his shoulder.
end flashback
Sirius.
His best friend. He'd been with him through everything. Sure, they'd fought but Sirius was like a brother to him. They were closer than blood. Sirius had been there when James had had his first kiss, when he had his first detention, his fir successful prank, his first love, his best moments and his worst moments. Sirius had always been there.
He climbed up the tree he leant against and looked up. He felt an overwhelming sense of misery. He'd miss this place. He'd miss it all. He'd miss the classes, the teachers, Dumbledore, head boy duties, his friends, Lily, heck…he'd even miss Snivellus.
He couldn't deal with this. He couldn't. It was just too hard.
Why couldn't he just do something he'd been longing to do all his life? Why couldn't he stand up to his father?
!-!-!-!
Lily Evans put on her cloak and bid goodbye to her friends. She decided she'd like a walk around the grounds before bed to settle her stomach.
Ever since hearing that James was leaving she had felt this weird feeling of…something. Something she couldn't put her finger on.
She had thought it over and she didn't know why she felt this way.
Sure, her friends had teased her about liking him, but she never thought she could. They had said it was obvious through all their fighting that they were totally in love, but she never believed it.
So what if she smiled remembering talking to him? So what if she could recount almost everything he ever said to her? So what if he was constantly on her mind? So what of she occasionally found herself looking at him when she shouldn't be? So what if the thought of him leaving clenched her heart in a way she had never felt before? So what?
It didn't mean anything.
So why did the thought of never seeing him again almost break her heart?
!-!-!-!
As he sat up in the tree he saw Lily Evans stroll by, looking worried. It wasn't often that a confused look dawned her face and it looked somewhat odd there. He saw her look morph into one of sadness and it pulled at his heartstrings. What he wouldn't give to take that look away and replace it with a smile. A genuine smile for him. But he knew that could never happen.
flashback
"Evans, go out with me." A fifth year James Potter commanded one day at lunch.
"No Potter." She said tiredly.
"Why not?"
"You want to know why not?" She asked. James could tell she was getting fired up, which was what he lived for.
"Yes. I don't see why you won't go out with me. Stop resisting my charms, you know you want to."
"Don't push me Potter." She warned, her temper rising.
"Or what?" He smirked. "You'll snog me right here?"
"You know why I won't go out with you? I won't go out with you because you're an immature, selfish, arrogant, obnoxious, bullying prick. I hate you so much I can't stand to be in the same room as you." She snarled. With that she picked up her pumpkin juice and tipped it over his head. "I will never go out with you. The mere thought makes my skin crawl."
James watched her go and, unknowingly, a little piece of him was hurt that day, and it wasn't just his pride.
end flashback
It'd all been fun and Games then. It had hurt his pride but that was about it. Lily Evans was a prize to him, imply a prize. He never thought he would feel anything for the green eyed witch. James Potter and feelings for a girl didn't happen. He would never let that happen. That was until he realised…he realised that maybe he did care a little more for Lily Evans than he wanted to let on. He realised that maybe he had gotten into something he couldn't get out of. Maybe he had let himself get caught up in feelings for a girl. That was when he realised he was in love with Lily Evans.
flashback
"I don't see why she won't go out with me!" It was mid-sixth year and James had just been rejected earlier that day. His moans of Lily Evans not dating him had become more frequent lately and that curious to his friends.
"Like you even care, Prongs." Sirius laughed, but it held a note of question.
"I need her to! It means I've got every girl I've ever gone after." James replied, but he was worried. Worried that for a while now he had been getting strange feelings for Lily Evans. Feelings that made his stomach jump and his heart go crazy.
"Are you sure that's it?" Remus asked.
"Yes!" James said quickly. What else could it be?
"Speak of the red head." Sirius smiled. "There she is."
James turned to see her cuddled up with a blonde sixth year boy and scowled. As the boy reached down and kissed her cheek James felt an unfamiliar emotion boil up inside him. Jealousy. As the two got closer he felt his heart tighten slightly. That was his Lily Evans. Wait a moment. What was he talking about? She was just another girl. He closed his eyes tightly, but all he could see was Lily's shining eyes.
"Stop it!" He screamed. Everyone turned to look at him but he walked out and his friends followed.
"I think that little outburst answered my earlier question." Remus smiled softly.
James looked down and when he finally breathed in he looked up, with wet eyes.
"Why do I feel this way?" He asked. "Why do I feel like I'm dying?" He asked confused.
"Think about it." Sirius said solemnly.
James though for a long time. He knew why, of course, but he refused to admit it. If you could see inside his head you would know he had known for a long time now but it went ignored. One last memory of Lily and the blonde boy crept into his head, he sucked in a breath.
"I love her." He said softly, more to himself than anyone else. "I love Lily Evans."
And he did.
end flashback
!-!-!-!
"Can you believe James is leaving?" Lily heard, yet again, the next morning. It was as though people were saying it in front of her deliberately, just to get her reaction. Lily knew that was stupid but still, as she heard yet another voice say James was leaving, she couldn't help wanting to scream 'stop it! Shut up! I know James is leaving so stop talking about it.'
"Do you know when?" Another girl asked.
"The end of this week supposedly."
"But he's so HOT!" A girl whined.
"The end of this week?" A girl chimed. "That's too bad."
Too bad indeed.
Not that she cared, of course.
!-!-!-!
James Potter felt like he was being watched a lot that day, throughout classes and mealtimes, and he would be right in thinking so. However, he could not pin the culprit, for every time he turned all he saw was the form of Lily Evans and that would be impossible. Why would Lily be watching him?
!-!-!-!
Lily awoke the next morning and shook her head. She had dreamt of James last night. It was stupid, she knew, for him to invade her subconscious like that, but was it her fault if he did?
She slowly rose and looked around.
Two days and then James is gone.
She scowled at herself. Why should she care?
Good Riddance.
Although her head said that her heart wasn't really in it.
!-!-!-!
Alison Carter had noticed something wrong with her friend all week. Lily Evans was not usually one to awake so late. Lily Evans was not one to space out in class. Lily Evans was not on to forget homework or other things. Lily Evans was not one to loose her head. But here she was, turning the dorm upside down, all in an effort to find a pen.
"Lily, I have a quill." Alison tried.
"I want my quill." Lily said determinedly.
"Why? It's just like all the other quills."
"Is that what you think?" Instantly Alison knew she had said the wrong thing. "So now I'm just supposed to forget about the quill? What do you think it will feel like? I'm just supposed to move on with my life, all happy and leave the quill, dejected and miserable, with its heart broken because its owner has forgotten about it and moved on?"
"What?" Alison asked. She feared her friend had mental issues sometimes.
"Never mind." Lily snapped. "But I will never desert that quill. You don't just leave people-" Lily looked horrified for a moment. "I mean things, yes, things that you love like that."
"Ok." Alison said slowly. She was beginning to think this wasn't about a quill anymore. She was about to question her friend further when their other roommates entered.
"It's so sad that he's leaving." Alison saw Lily stiffen in her hunt.
"I know, everyone will miss him."
"James is so cute. How will we ever go on?"
"I think I'm going to die." One wailed dramatically.
"I can't believe James is leaving."
"Would you shut up?" Lily snarled. "We get it. James is leaving, shut your mouth about it." The girls looked momentarily offended. After all, Lily was usually a friend, not a close friend, but a friend to them.
"Well Sorrrrreeeee, just because you're like, in love with him." One giggled.
"I am not in love with him." Lily said through gritted teeth.
"Yes you are. You two always fight, you've got chemistry and you two are exactly alike."
"We are not." Lily growled. Alison feared for the girl's safety.
"You totally are." The girl responded "You're like the female version of him."
"That's it!" Lily yelled. "GET OUT! GET THE HELL OUT OF THIS ROOM BEFORE I SNAP YOUR NECKS!"
The girls scattered out, worrying about the legendary red head temper.
Lily went back to her search.
"What was that about?" Alison asked, with an eyebrow raised.
"Nothing." Lily said stiffly.
"Admit it." Alison demanded and sat Lily down on a nearby bed.
"What?"
"Admit you like James Potter."
"I don't. I could ne-" Lily stopped at Alison's look.
"I kind of like James Potter." Lily muttered.
"What?"
"I said…I kind of like James Potter." Lily spoke louder.
"Aw! I knew it! Lily likes James! Lily likes James."
"Stop it." Lily snapped.
"So that's why you were looking so sad all day." Alison laughed.
"Stop."
"And that's why you've been shooting glances at him."
"I mean it."
"This explains a lot. I knew it, too! With all your fighting! It was so obvious."
"Please, stop," Lily pleaded.
"I mean-" She was cut off as she saw tears streaming down Lily's face. "I'm sorry, Lily. I didn't mean to make you cry. I'm sorry for teasing you."
"I'm not crying because of that." Lily snapped.
"But why-"
"Why do you think?" Lily stood up, wiped her face, and walked to her bed.
"Oh." Her friend said quietly. "You're really going to miss him, huh?"
"Just a little." Lily sniffed. Her friend moved over to her.
"I can tell you really like him."
"I don't! Just a little bit!" Lily defended.
"Then why are you crying?"
"I don't know. I just…I'm never going to see him again." Lily spoke sadly.
"You can still see each other! He can visit. He'll be coming to see Sirius and the boys anyway."
"He'll be coming to see them not me. He won't even want to see me. Long distance relationships don't work. He'll find some American girl and fall hopelessly in love."
"He's already in love. In love with you."
"Don't be silly." Lily reprimanded. "He hasn't asked me out all year."
"He is in love with you. I've seen the way he looks at you. You have to tell him you love him."
"I don't! I only like him."
"Sure. I'll be in the library when you're ready to tell me the truth." She stood up and left Lily to her tears.
!-!-!-!
Lily stood up and decided she was going for a walk. She didn't like James Potter. That was stupid. How could she be so brainless? She couldn't like someone who was leaving.
Thoughts whizzed through her head as her feet padded along the hallways. Suddenly she stopped and looked out a window. It was beautiful, but that didn't resolve her melancholy mood. Only-
"Oof." Her thoughts were cut short as something slammed into her.
"I'm so sorry." A voice said. Speak of the devil, Lily sighed. "Here," James held out his hand.
"Thanks Potter." She said icily. She couldn't deal with him right now.
"Lily, why do you always have to be so mean to me?" He asked angrily.
"I-"
"No. My turn to talk. I mean, sure, I acted like a jerk, but I stopped, I grew up and you still treat me as though I'm a disgusting piece of slime on your shoe."
"Potter, I treat you that way because you are a prat. Once a prat, always a prat." The words physically hurt her, and once glance at his eyes told her that they hurt him too.
"Fine. You know what? Screw it. I'm out of here in two days and I'm not going to go through this and get hurt again." He pulled her close and pressed his lips firmly to hers before stepping away. "Someday you may cry for me like I cried for you. Someday you'll miss me like I'm going to miss you. Someday you'll need me like I needed you. Someday you may love me, Lily Evans, but you know what? If that day ever comes I might not love you." With that last word he walked away from her and Lily felt tears flow freely.
I do cry for you, I will miss you, I do need you...
And I think I might love you.
!-!-!-!
James silently berated himself.
Why did I do that? Why couldn't I have just left it?
He knew he had just started that fight so it was easier to leave her. It was easier to leave someone when you were angry at them.
Yet, while he wanted to hate her, he couldn't. He loved her too much.
!-!-!-!
Lily stood silently as tears poured down her face when another person approached her. She quickly wiped of the tears put it did nothing for her tearstained face.
"Evans, have you seen James?" The handsome Sirius Black asked.
"That way." She nodded with her head.
"Thanks." He suddenly did a double take. "Evans…have you been…crying?" He asked gently.
"No," she lied.
"Ok, well…I'll be seeing you then." He walked away cautiously. When he looked back he saw her slumped against the wall, head in hands. Cursing his weakness for women crying he went back to the girl.
"Evans…Lily…um, what's, er, wrong?" H fumbled over his words. A yelling Lily Evans he could handle and crying Lily Evans scared the hell out of him.
"I'm sorry." She wailed.
"What for?" He asked, his interest piqued.
"James." She said quietly, more to herself.
"What?" He asked shocked. "Evans did you say James?" He knelt by her.
She looked up at him and nodded weekly.
"What did you do to him?" He asked angrily. "What did you do?"
"I think…I think I hurt him."
"How?" He demanded, shaking her a little.
"He…he loved me, did you know?"
"Yes I knew. The whole school knew, for Merlin's sake. What's your point?"
"I shouldn't be talking to you. I don't even know you," She snapped coming to your senses.
"The hell you're not talking to me. James is my best friend and if it's got something to do with him it's got something to do with me. C'mon, tell old Sirius. I won't tell a soul." He sat beside her.
"What happened to the immature, insensitive Sirius Black?" Lily asked suspiciously.
"He is currently taking a leave of absence in order to help you out."
"Ok. You won't tell anyone, not even James?" She stressed.
"I won't. Unless it's harmful to him, then you know I can't do that."
"Well…" She began. "James and I…we just met in the hallway and he…he asked me why I was so mean and I answered as usual. But he didn't take it like usual. He gave me this speech about him crying and missing me and needing me. He said someday I might love him but he might not love me."
"And?" Sirius asked. Why the hell did that upset her? It's not as if… "Evans, do you like James?"
She looked at the ceiling. "I think I do. I might even love him. I think I have for a long time."
Sirius just looked at her. "Evans, are you serious?"
"Do I look like I'm joking with you?" She asked angrily.
"Let's go." E said standing up.
"Where?" She asked following him.
"To tall James, of course." He grinned. "This is great. I knew he was borderline to stand up to his parents. This might just give him the last push. I think we've got it."
"No." Lily said, stopping still.
"What?"
"I said no. I'm not telling him."
"Why the hell not?" Sirius asked furiously.
"I just can't."
"Evans, don't you see? You're our last hope. You have to tell him."
"No, Black. I said I won't. And you can't either. I'm not doing it."
"Damn you, Evans. This is our only hope at getting him to fight to stay. Why can't you."
"I just…can't."
"Right, look Evans, this is very important. I know James will stay if you tell him. I know it."
"You didn't hear him. He's mad. He hates me. I won't be rejected."
"Evans, James could never hate you." Sirius said softly.
"He does."
"Look, when you've finished with this…self doubt thing, you know where to find me. And James."
"Fine." She said icily.
"And Evans?"
"Yes?"
"Don't take to long. You're our last chance."
Our last chance…
!-!-!-!
Saturday.
James leaves tomorrow.
Lily awoke with her head pounding.
So maybe she did like James Potter. Maybe even love the boy.
Now what?
She couldn't possibly tell him.
No way.
That would be too embarrassing.
Plus, he was leaving so there was no point.
He wouldn't stay just because of her.
Long distance relationships don't work. She chided herself.
She thought mentally of the pros and cons of telling James.
Pro, he might love me back. Con, he might not love me. Pro, I'll feel better for telling him. Con, I'll be embarrassed. Pro, he might stay. Con, he might laugh in my face and leave. Pro, I love him so I should tell him.
She made up her mind.
She was going to tell him.
Tonight.
!-!-!-!
James spent most of the day laughing with his friends. Although, through the laughter, he couldn't help but still feel empty. He knew they felt it too. He knew, throughout the day, they were all thinking this is the last time. The last time we will be able to do this.
He knew they were thinking he should just stand up to his dad.
He knew they were right.
He wanted too.
He almost considered it too.
But he couldn't.
There was no way.
"And then I told McGonagall 'Sometimes I think you have to march right in and demand your rights, even if you don't know what your rights are, or who the person is you're talking to. Then on the way out, slam the door.' As you can imagine she wasn't too impressed and I got detention all next week."
"Sirius you idiot." Remus laughed. "Why can't you be sensible, like me."
"Or Prongs. Prongs is sensible, why do you think he's Head boy? Or was." Peter put in. All of a sudden he looked shocked at himself and shut up.
There was silence.
All day, the Marauders had been skirting around the issue of James leaving and there it was, Black and white.
James was leaving.
And with that James fled from the table and went to think.
He needed to think.
!-!-!-!
I guess it's time, Lily said to herself.
"Suck it up." Alison said. Lily had told her of what she was going to do.
"I don't know if I can." Lily said feebly.
"You are doing it. NOW!" Alison commanded. "Get going."
"Ok, ok. I just hope this goes well."
I really hope I can do this.
!-!-!-!
James was sitting, staring out at the lake. Today was his last full day at Hogwarts.
Tomorrow was Sunday.
His last day.
He contemplated running away but he knew it would be silly.
He thought about standing up to his parents but he knew he just couldn't.
If anyone could see the great James Potter now they wouldn't believe it was him.
James Potter was known for his upbeat attitude and happiness.
James Potter was known for his charm and grin.
Most of all, James Potter was known for his courage.
But if you could see James Potter now you would see none of that. When it came to his parents James Potter lacked the courage that was needed. The courage that he wanted.
"I don't belong in Gryffindor." He muttered.
"Yes, you do." A female voice whispered, and James whipped around.
"Lily, what do you want? To tear me to shreds for kissing you? I'm not sorry and I don't regret it." He said solidly.
"No, James, I just came to apologise." James looked at her long and hard.
"Really?" He asked suspiciously. "For what?"
"I've…I've been so rude to you over the last few years. You didn't deserve it, ok, maybe a little, but not lately. I'm sorry."
"Don't mention it." He smiled. "At least you were talking to me."
They stood in silence. Lily was sure it was the right moment to tell him. I'll just say it. Just blurt it out. She opened her mouth and-
"Lily, would you like to dance?" James asked.
"What?" She asked uncertainly.
"Would you like to dance?" He asked again. His eyes held silent hope.
"There's no music." She stated the obvious.
"We don't need any."
She just looked at him.
"I'll ask, this last time, for only one dance. I'm leaving tomorrow Lily and I would love to finally get the dance I've been waiting for." He paused. "Please?"
Lily looked down at his hazel eyes and found some comfort.
"Very well, but stand up. You can't very well dance on your knees can you?" She smiled.
He stood up happily.
James took Lily's hand in his and put his arm on her waist. She delicately put her hand on his shoulder and looked up into his eyes. Slowly, the two started to move. Graceful and lingering, never breaking eye contact.
Lily smiled as James spun her out under his arm and drew her closer. She felt the breeze whip around the two and embraced the warm comfort coming off his chest. She could have sworn there was a soft music floating in the air that wrapped around the two.
Finally they finished their drawn out dance by swaying gently in each others arms.
When James finally let go off Lily she still felt his lingering touch.
"Lily, I-" James started staring into her eyes.
"I can't do this." She whispered and turned on her heel and ran.
"Wait! Lily! Stop!" James cried, to no avail.
She was gone.
And James knew she wasn't coming back.
!-!-!-!
As Lily ran hurriedly across the grounds she thought to herself.
She was a failure.
She was no Gryffindor.
But she couldn't do it.
One look into those hazel eyes and she panicked.
I can't tell him.
I just can't.
"How'd it go?" Alison asked Lily as she walked in.
"I couldn't do it." Lily said as she walked by. "I will never be able to do it."
Bye James.
!-!-!-!
Sunday morning.
Oh what a beautiful day.
Lily stared outside as a carriage pulled up outside the Hogwarts gates.
She looked down at the window and saw the four Marauders outside the doors of the castle and she walked away from the window.
She couldn't watch him leave.
It hurt too much.
!-!-!-!
"James, you can't do this." Sirius tried one last time as the Potters walked over.
"I-I-I have to."
"I won't let you." Sirius charged forward.
"Sirius? What can I do for you?" Mr Potter asked. Sirius had always liked the man, after he took him in and all, but he couldn't stand this.
"You can't take James away."
"I most certainly can. It will be much better for him in America. More opportunities."
"What about what he wants?" Sirius demanded.
"He doesn't know what he wants."
"He does. Tell him." He spoke to James.
James tried. He really did. But the words got caught in his throat.
"See? He has no idea."
"Tell him." Sirius growled. "Be the James Potter we all know and tell him."
"Leave it Sirius." James whispered. "It's done."
"I can't believe you." Sirius cried. "Does our friendship mean nothing to you?"
James stayed silent. It was just too hard to talk.
"I'll be in the carriage James." His father spoke clearly. "Don't be too long."
James looked at his mother and saw she was crying.
He knew this wasn't her choice to move him.
!-!-!-!
Lily looked out the window once more.
She couldn't leave it like this.
She had to do something.
!-!-!-!
James looked around expectantly as his parents left,
No sign of her.
He'd gotten his hopes up.
He'd just thought…maybe…after their dance last night…
It was stupid of him to get his hopes up.
Lily wasn't coming.
James sighed dejectedly and picked up his trunk.
"Well," he turned to his friends. "I guess…this is it. I'll miss you guys. See you around."
"Goodbye James." Remus whispered. "You're one of the greatest friends I'll ever have. Keep in touch."
"Bye, Mate." Peter offered. "We'll see you whenever we can."
"Sure. I promise we will." James smiled, but his heart wasn't in it.
He turned to Sirius, who looked away.
"James!" His father called.
James turned and started away.
"Wait!" Sirius yelled. "Sorry, man." He said thickly as he pulled his best friend into a hug. "You're the best friend a guy could ever ask for."
"You too, Padfoot, you too." James said, dropping his trunk and clapping his back. "I'm sorry I can't stand up to him. I wish I could. I almost did. But I can't."
"It ok." Sirius smiled and let him go. "We all have our weaknesses."
"I better go." James picked up his trunk, once again. "See you around."
!-!-!-!
Almost there, Lily thought to herself as she frantically ran through the Hogwarts hallways.
Please don't let me be too late.
!-!-!-!
James slowly walked down the path of the castle.
As he reached his parents he took one last look at the castle. At his friends.
She wasn't coming.
"Come on James." His father said strongly.
James put his trunk in the carriage.
"James!" A voice cried. James couldn't believe it.
"James! Stop!" A breathless voice yelled.
"Lily?" James whispered softly. He turned softly to see the shining red head of the girl he'd been waiting for.
"James, I have to tell you…to tell you…" Suck it up Lily. Say it. "I-I love you." She blurted out.
James stood silently. Did he just hear that?
"What?" He croaked, finding his voice.
"I love you James Potter." She smiled sadly. "And I know it's too late. I shouldn't have made you wait…but I love you, I think I loved you all along. And I'll miss you. And I need you. And I want you. But you're leaving."
"James. Who is this?" His mother asked.
"Lily Evans." He spoke, his eyes never leaving Lily's.
"Pleasure to meet you." She spoke to his parents. "Mr Potter, I must insist you don't take James. I can't let him go."
"And why is that?" He asked curiously.
"Because I love him and if he left I wouldn't be able to handle it."
"And you're the same Lily Evans I've heard all about?" He asked. "The one who continuously mocked and turned down my son?" Lily blushed.
"I am sir. But that is in the past."
"Very well. I can see you really believe you love this girl, James." Mr Potter spoke in a confident tone. "But it is foolish. Come along James."
"But-" Lily spoke up.
"No."
"I beg your pardon, James?" His father asked.
"I said no. I'm staying here." He turned to his father.
"You most certainly are not." His father growled.
"I am. I'm of age and I'm not leaving."
"I see. What has gotten into you?"
"I just gathered up some of the courage I've been waiting for. I'm not leaving my friends. I'm not leaving my school. I'm not leaving Lily." He spoke determinedly.
"And you would pick all of…" he waved his hand around, "this over your family."
James looked towards Sirius, Remus and Peter.
"Yes. Yes, I would."
"I will not have this." Mr Potter started.
"Leave it, Harold." Mrs Potter finally spoke. "You said last night, if James really wanted to stay he would say so. Now he is."
"But… Mr Potter sighed. "You're right. I guess you've got a bit of the old Gryffindor spirit in you after all." Mr Potter winked. "I'll see you in the holidays. And if your school work slips…you're out."
"It won't." James hugged his father tight and then his mother. "Goodbye."
"Goodbye, son." Mr Potter ruffled his hair and then stepped into the carriage. "A pleasure to meet you Miss Evans."
"And you." She grinned.
As the carriage sped away Lily turned to James.
"I guess you're staying after all." She smiled wryly.
"You bet I'm staying. And you're going to spend every last minute with me." He kissed her sweetly on the cheek and looked to his friends, who were charging down the pathway. "And the other Marauders."
"What have I got myself into?" She groaned.
But as she saw Sirius run up and tackle James, with Remus and Peter soon after to form a dog pile, she decided maybe it wouldn't be so bad after all.
She could get used to this.