Things Only Remy's Cat Knows

Chapter 2, Adulthood

Remy came back for me, just like I knew he would.

He was sad though. At night, he'd have nightmares. I'd cuddle up on his chest when he laid awake at night and talked to me. Really, he wasn't talking to 'me,' he was talking and I just happened to be the only creature there. I didn't understand everything he said, but I listened intently, which was the important part.

"He lied t'me." He said.

Mew! (I'm sorry, Remy)

I wanted him to know that I was his friend, and he never needed to leave me behind again.

He didn't.

Everywhere he went, I went with him. Jewel heists, art theft, and everything else you can imagine, I was there, traveling with him in my soft green carrier. We were a good team, too. Everybody knows people hate keeping secrets. Remy told me all of his.

Those were good times for us.

He stole a string of Tahitian pearls once and my curiosity nearly killed me when Remy came in and found me standing in the middle of the floor, batting the pearls around the floor, having broken the string they were on hours before. "Oscar!" He yelled. He spent the better part of the next morning crawling around on the floor on his hands and knees looking for the pearls while I stood as lookout on his back. Then, he let me help him re-string them!

Sometimes, he'd bring women in and out. I didn't like them very much. Cuddling with Remy was MY job! Sometimes, I'd shred their clothes while they slept in our bed, snuggling with my Remy. Of course, they just assumed it was something Remy had done in what never ceased to be more than a fifteen second race to get his many mates naked.

One night, he ran into a little girl. She was so sweet! She treated me so well, sometimes I think Remy was jealous that I liked her so much. Long story short, she was actually a woman named Storm, who lead Remy to the X-Men. Even there, I stayed with Remy. My master was a superhero! I was so proud of him, and happy for him. He started to like this other human, her name was Rogue. When she came into the picture, he spent less time with me, so I was naturally jealous.

I set out to sabotage their relationship. If Rogue had a pile of clean laundry, I NEEDED to sleep right on top of it and get my fur all over her clothes. One time, I even snuck outside and killed a bird, then put it in her bed. I knew what Remy would do. "He just tryin' t'give you a present, chere." If she was walking down the stairs, I naturally needed to walk right in front of her, doing every maneuver I could think of to trip her. I soon learned she could fly, and that this was mostly useless, but still I tried. And then, Remy began scowling at me and telling me, ME, his precious Oscar, his kitty, that word I never thought I'd hear. "NO."

And I naturally took it out on Remy by eating all his shoelaces in the middle of the night. If I could have blamed it on her, I would have. I started acting out in mischief against the other members, and barely ever took the blame for it. Storm blamed Beast when I ate one of her plants, Jubilee blamed Logan for scratching and ruining some of her clothes, Rogue blamed Remy when I used her bed as a scratching post (I don't know why, even now), and, possibly the most amusing – Cyclops accused Bobby of peeing in Jean's garden.

I saw him grow and change a lot. I think sometimes, that Remy was like a kitten when he found me, and that he grew into a real tiger while he was with the X-Men. I saw him fight a couple of times when our nice home was attacked. He was so brave! Other people came and went, and sometimes I think I was happiest to be the cat on some lonely mutants lap (which was amusingly Bobby Drake in most cases).

The white man with red eyes came into our home at the mansion one night. I remembered him. He hurt me and Remy when I was just a kitten. This time, when I saw him, I was smart. I crawled up the curtains and leapt onto his face, scratching at his face. He threw my down and I ran away. They others got him though, and that made me feel like part of the team. Oscar the X-Kitty!

Ahhh…life with the X-Men. I learned how to evade death when we were with them. Those silly mutants were always blowing up, burning, or otherwise destroying our home. Or, if they weren't, someone else was. I learned things.

1. When Logan growls, nobody wins, someone gets hurt, and everything gets demolished.
2. Cat's hate water, but love to eat plants. Want a shower? Eat one of Storm's.
3. Scott Summers may have a stick up his ass, but he gives a damn good back stratch.
4. Kurt is scary. Bamf my little ass.
5. 'Here Kitty, Kitty, Kitty,' is meant for me, unless Colossus says it, in which case I DON'T want to come.

After one mission, Remy didn't come home when the others did, and everyone was upset. That could only have meant one thing! I ran down to the Medlab, losing traction several times as a sped through the mansion. Remy was asleep and hurt badly. I heard Beast say he was in a coma, but I never found out why…I guess it doesn't matter. I stayed by his side until he opened his eyes and I knew he was going to be okay. I lost three pounds while he was sleeping, I was so afraid he was never going to get up. When he finally did, I was so happy!

Meow! Mew Mew Mew Mew! (You son of a bitch, no more catnaps for you!)

He smiled at me and stroked my fur, the same way he did the same day he rescued me from eating garbage in that alley.

A couple of years later, it happened again. Except, this time, I rushed to Hank and there was no Remy! I walked all over the mansion looking for my master. I cried, I begged, I hissed, I spat…nothing made Remy come back.

I knew he was dead when Storm moved my food bowls to her bedroom.


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Next Chapter: How to Be Remy's Kitty

Doza – I love cats. I have a new little kitten which I named Logan, because he REALLY overuses his claws.
BJ – Of course, the only mangy bitch Remy will ever love is Rogue! (hehehehe!)
Shockgoddess – Here's more, I hope you enjoy.
Puppybaddog – I am officially jealous of fictional Remy's even more fictional cat. Who wouldn't love to snuggle that man?
BlkDiamond – Yeah, I thought of you when I wrote this. (p.s. check your email!)
Selene – Awww…that's cute! Yay for you for rescuing a kitty too!
Angelique Sauvegarde – Yes, that's very true.