Chapter, chapter, second chapter... I REALLY WISH I OWNED SLAYERS, BUT I DO NOT! I own this fiction, don't touch. Ah, go ahead and touch it, just do not try to pass it on as your own. Otherwise, I shall eat you. -glares- Monkey fudge.
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"I'm tired Zelgadis," Gourry whined as they walked up the stairs in the hockey rink, headed towards the conference room. They had both woken up an hour earlier than usual so they could get to the meeting on time. It seemed to work, since they were dressed nicely in suits instead of their usual, more relaxed attire.
"Oh, shut up," Zelgadis groaned. They reached the skybox conference room and casually walked in. There were not all that many people in the large, neutral-feeling room. Just Elena's brother Frederick, Amelia del Seiryuun, a short, smartly dressed red-headed woman and the team owner, Prince Phil del Seiryuun.
"Ah! You two are finally here!" Frederick exclaimed, his pale green eyes gleaming with excitement. "Come and sit down so that the meeting can get under way!" Zelgadis and Gourry sat down nervously.
"Where is the rest of the team?" Zelgadis asked.
"Not here, where else?" the red-headed woman scowled. She leaned back in her seat, looking like she would rather be somewhere else.
"Well, the rest of the team decided to let the both of you represent them all," Amelia said pleasantly. "They believe you will do well."
"What was this meeting about again?" Gourry asked absentmindedly. Zelgadis wanted to shrink and die at that comment, but opted to drive his heel into his friend's left shin.
"This meeting is over the new head coach position that has recently opened up," Prince Phil said. "In the name of all that is ice hockey, we shall gain a new coach soon!" The man was very passionate about hockey and it was not unusual to anyone else in the room to see him strike a heroic pose.
"Well, then what am I here for?" the red-headed woman said, leaning forward onto the table.
"You, Inverse-san, are our top choice for our new head coach," Amelia said happily. "We have reviewed your performance over the years and believe you to be the perfect selection. Your record is unmatched, methods perfect and exactly what we want. Besides, you are a fresh face to the big scene and this could make you an instant celebrity."
"Like a rich celebrity?" the woman asked, dollar signs clearly in her eyes.
Geez, what a shallow woman, Zelgadis thought. He rolled his eyes and let Frederick talk.
"Yes Inverse-san. Now there are some details that have to be worked out, but after those are cleared, you are the head coach." He looked over at Zelgadis and Gourry. "These are the player representatives, Zelgadis Graywords and Gourry Gabriev. Zelgadis-san, Gourry-san, meet Lina Inverse."
"Hello there," Zelgadis said gruffly as he stood up and shook Lina's hand. Gourry just sat there, staring at Lina's chest, marveling at how it could be so flat. "Just do not mind my teammate, he is still asleep. Can I see her records?" Frederick handed him a manila folder that had everything about Lina's coaching career inside.
"Zelgadis... I'm awake though..." Gourry whispered. Heel found shin once more as Zelgadis reviewed the folder contents out loud.
"Let me see... it is a slight bit unusual that you have been coaching since you were fifteen. Those ten years under your belt should prove useful though. You have an impressive record and a .750 win percentage... also good. Coworkers say you are fiercely determined and dedicated... it seems like you would make a fine coach for us." Zelgadis closed the folder and threw it onto the top of the table. "I give you a trial of five weeks. If you do not meet expectations, the team will not accept you and you shall fail your role as our coach."
"Fine," Lina smirked. "I will be the best head coach the Seiryuun Slayers have ever seen!" She grinned devilishly and gave the V-for-victory sign. Everyone, except the ever dense Gourry, sweatdropped, knowing that this was the effect of a over-inflated ego.
"You can talk the talk, but can you walk the walk?" Frederick said. "Yes your resume is impressive, but can you prove to us that you can do everything it says? If so, then you are a coaching prodigy." He sent a sharp glance over towards Lina, who slightly cowered at the stare, proving the man had insane manipulation skills.
"I think she will be just fine!" Amelia said. "Come on Inverse-san, let us get you to your new office." She dragged Lina towards the door and out of sight, pausing only a moment to snatch a cardboard box from the corner of the room.
"This worries me you guys," Frederick said, removing a pair of reading glasses from his breast pocket and putting them on. He picked up the manila folder he handed Zelgadis earlier and started to look through it.
"What? From what we have gathered, this is one of the best coaches there is!" Phil said. "Are you saying she could be lying?"
"Not her or her papers, but something we are overlooking," Frederick muttered.
"I'm hungry," Gourry randomly cut in. The other three men glared at him.
"This is a serious situation," Zelgadis hissed. "If you cannot say anything constructive, say nothing at all."
"Okay..." Gourry sighed. He put his head down and tried to dream of food.
"Well then," Frederick said. "I guess that we just have to wait and see what arises, no matter how much it pains us."
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Amelia led Lina into a nice looking office space. There was a table and chairs and her own desk. Places where Coach Lang had put his personal belongings stood empty, ready to be filled.
This looks like a good place to start, Lina thought as she put the cardboard box down on the desk. She looked around, thinking about what she could do with the spaces.
"Do you like it Inverse-san?" Amelia asked.
"Please, just Lina. You do not wish me to address you as 'Your Highness', but why should I be the elder here?"
"Sorry Inverse-san. Forced habit."
"Amelia-chan..."
"Would you like me to help you unpack your things?"
Lina glared at Amelia. The Princess of Seiryuun was getting on her nerves. All she did though was sigh and open the box, allowing Amelia to take trinkets out and place them on the table.
"Inverse-san," Amelia said, taking a picture frame from the box. "Is this one of the teams you coached?" The picture looked fairly recent and slightly confused Amelia. The team was a bunch of children, none of whom looked over ten years old. In the center of the picture was a large trophy and the child on either side of it grinned excitedly as they gripped its handles.
"Yeah. They really did not want me to leave. I had been coaching them for a long time. Well, not the kids, but the team at least. It really was fun."
"You coached children?"
"Amelia-chan, did you think I started to coach college ice hockey when I was fifteen?" Lina chuckled. "Of course I have worked with children."
"Have you only worked with children?" Amelia was definitely worried now. Coaching ten-year-olds was vastly different from coaching full grown men. If Lina could not adjust, then everything would go down the toilet right then and there.
"Obviously! This is my first coaching job where the athletes are out of puberty! The closest I came to coaching a team like this is being assistant coach for a high school team. Do not worry though! I have everything under control!"
That was it. Amelia was not liking this situation. At least the player representatives gave her five weeks to prove herself. No, Zelgadis gave Lina the trial.
Zelgadis, she thought. Wait, back to the matter at hand. If Lina did not pass the month-long test, then she was gone. Then Amelia would have to go and find another coach. The Olympic Games would start in four months from that moment and the team was already at a handicap with their old coach gone. Seiryuun ice hockey was in such trouble.
"Amelia-chan," Lina said. "Did you guys not check the age level I coached or something? You seem a little worried."
"Oh, it is nothing Inverse-san," Amelia lied quickly. "I was just thinking about the busy schedule that is coming up for the Games. I am on the country's committee you know. In fact, I should leave for another meeting right now." Nervously, she backed out the door and left a confused Lina to finish unpacking her stuff.
Amelia nearly ran down the hall. She had to tell the others that Lina was a children's coach quickly. When she came to the door to the conference room, she tried to skid to a halt, but lost balance on her high heel shoes and fell to the ground.
"Princess! Are you alright?" Frederick asked as he and Zelgadis rushed out into the hallway. Prince Phil had left at this time and Gourry was happily asleep, dreaming of what a delicious breakfast scones and muffins would be.
"Yeah, I'm fine," she said as Zelgadis helped her up. Once standing, she looked up at Zelgadis's face, only to see him blush a slight bit. Blood rushed to her face in return and she quickly looked at Frederick. "I think there might be a problem with picking Inverse-san as the new head coach."
"Why? What is the matter?" Frederick asked.
"She coached children before this," Amelia said with distress in her voice.
"So?" Zelgadis slightly laughed. "She had to start somewhere."
"No, she has always taught children. I doubt she ever went higher than ten-year-olds."
"Ten? We're not ten! Damn, that woman will not have a clue to what she is doing!" Zelgadis angrily sighed. He started to nervously pace around the room. "There are drills and plays she does not know and..."
"Calm down!" Frederick said, snatching hold of Zelgadis's arm as he paced by. "I will give her all of the old plays and such that Coach Lang left behind. Before the first practice, she should know what to do and what not to do."
"She better, or our chances of getting anywhere go right out the window!" Amelia moaned. "We are already handicapped by having a new coach..."
"Princess, I think we should trust Frederick. He seems to be formulating a plan in that odd skull of his," Zelgadis said, finally calming down. He looked over at Frederick and they both laughed.
"You are most definitely right," Frederick laughed. "I am going to take over if she is deemed incapable. You would not disagree to that now would you?"
"Yes, but how would Gourry-san feel about all of this?" Amelia asked, looking over at the snoring Gourry. Zelgadis went over to the blond behemoth and jabbed him in the side.
"Luke the Scone, you sure are tasty!" Gourry said in his sleep, reaching out and grabbing the imaginary pastry. "Maddi is a yummy muffin!"
"Now that... is disturbing," Frederick said. Zelgadis and Amelia were too taken aback to do or say anything. After a short while, Zelgadis nudged Gourry in the side until he fell out of his chair and onto the floor.
"I'm coming Elizabeth!" Gourry yelled out, still sleeping. Zelgadis kicked him in the rib cage, nearly sending the poor man across the room.
"Zelgadis-san! That is our best forward! If you just put him out of commission, I'll..."
"Don't worry your highness," Frederick cut in, shortening Amelia's lecture considerably. "I think if our Jellyfish can handle being checked into the boards at top speed, then he can certainly handle a swift kick, right Zelgadis-kun?"
"Exactly," Zelgadis muttered.
"Ow! What did you do that for?" Gourry moaned as he got up off the ground.
"Who is 'Elizabeth'?" Zelgadis snapped. The last few disturbing moments had him a bit cranky and unlike himself.
"I don't know, who is she?" Gourry asked. Zelgadis, not wanting to lose his temper, just walked out of the room and down the hallway.
"Remember, practice is at two in the afternoon tomorrow!" Amelia yelled down the hall. She had a gut-wrenching feeling that these next four months would be one torturous ride.
Sorry that the conversations just went in a loopy-loop circle, but I really had to emphasize that Lina is actually under-qualified for the job. I actually see myself in Lina's position in the coming years when I apply for a job as a teacher. Like everyone needs to know that... Righty then! Enough of my ramblings! Review please! Arigato ne!
References/Parodies I Do Not Own So Do Not Punish Me
Negotiation Meeting- Sort of modeled after the meetings for the NHL during the lockout, where the players had representatives and such. I hated the lockout. -cries- I'm better now. I have hockey back. -grins-
Scones and Muffins- Inside joke between my friends and me. Guys are Scones and girls are Muffins. We are strange American children.
"I'm coming Elizabeth!"- This quote is heard in nearly every show of an old sitcom from the seventies called Sanford and Son, where old Fred Sanford was a widower who would think he's dying at least one scene per episode. The movie Shrek 2 parodies this as well.