Summary: Yet another Halloween fic.

Disclaimer: I own... hmm. I own nothing. The bank owns any money I make, at the moment.

Feedback: Why not? It helps me write more and better...

Pre-fic Comments:

I hate mornings. I hate mornings where I have to go work and learn. There should be a law against mornings, saying that work and learning should wait until noon, and go until 8 or 9 at night. You know, everyone wake up at 11am rather tham 7am.

Brand new theme song for *this* Scooby Gang: "Crush 'Em", by Megadeth. *sings* "Now I lay you down to rest/You'll never be more than second best/Step inside, you're in for a ride/As we CRUSH (crush!) CRUSH 'EM!"

* * *

Giles frogmarched Ethan back to the Library at crossbow-point, shackling him to the bookcage with some manacles and locking the bookcage door. After considering matters, he decided that the best place to begin his search for his charges would be the Bronze, then randomly walking the routes that Principal Snyder had assigned the primary school escorts. He distinctly remembered his charges as being rather upset with Snyder for volunteering them.

This time, he remembered to bring a stake, and a cross.

As he drove through Sunnydale, he found he had to go slowly. People were panicking, running across the street. Passing the Industrial part of town that housed the warehouses, a blue-haired vampiress lacking any clothes ran up to his car, banging on the window. In a way, it was quite comical, as she was attempting to cover her private parts while also banging on his car window. He held up his cross, then wound the window down cautiously.

"Giles! Man, am I glad to see you!," the vampiress said. She had an uncanny resemblance to someone he knew...

"Er, might I ask who are you?," Giles asked.

"Willow! I'm Willow! Giles, have you got any spare clothes?"

"Before I do, do you have any proof that you are in fact Willow?"

The vampiress scowled at him. "Moloch was an ass, and I dumped his ass. Clothes, *please*?"

This was pretty good proof. Jenny's circle of technopagans, or whatever they were called, were the only ones to know about Moloch the Corruptor. Giles gave her the change of clothes he routinely carried in the back -- a pair of pants, and a T-shirt. Willow had to roll the pant legs up.

Giles looked her up and down once she had dressed. "Well, I'm quite surprised at you. Where are the other two?"

"Uhhhh," Willow began, thinking hard. It was quite hard to remember parts of the night, although other parts were quite clear in her mind. Pity. "I /think/ that Xander's at the Bronze, and Buffy was roaming Sunnydale."

"Well, we'd best get Xander," Giles said.

* * *

Xander was having the time of his life. All these girls, /wanting/ him, and for some reason he just kept going and going. His conscience was getting down on him, though.

He got up from the sofa, gently putting Amy to one side, and pulled on his leather pants as best he could. Then he got a shock.

The tail was still attached. After an experimental flap, he discovered the wings were too. Another brief check revealed that he still had the horns, and his fingernails were still long, and iron hard.

Well.

"I hope I don't come across Buffy in a dark alley," Xander muttered.

Cordelia wrapped herself around him. "C'mon, don't you wanna have some more fun?"

"Sorry, places to go, things to do, librarians to get killed by," Xander quipped. "You go have fun with your friends."

As Xander the Incubus left the Bronze, the spell slowly left the people in there, and they collectively agreed within a quarter of an hour that no one would ever speak of that Halloween again.

"Hey, G-man," Xander yelled, waving to a distinctive crappy car that was rapidly becoming infamous. "Over here!"

Xander soooo hoped that Giles would write off his appearance as a costume.

The Englishman pulled up next to Xander on the sidewalk, and Giles got out.

"Good Lord, Xander, what are you covered with? Why on earth are you costumed as an incubus, of all things?"

Wow. He hadn't realised he was covered with... fluid. Yeah. That was a decent euphemism for now. "Got a towel, Giles?"

Giles got one out of the boot of his car, careful not to touch Xander as he handed it over. "Please, keep it. I mean that."

His pants were relatively unsullied, but the rest of him was coated in... fluid.

* * *

Buffy was having a /really/ bad night. She'd planned to have fun pissing off Snyder, then going to the Bronze with Xander and Wills to have fun partying. Instead, she found herself wandering the sewer system of Sunnydale with way-gross memories that she'd much rather forget.

"Human! Die!," she heard, followed by a brilliant blue orb of fire rolling past her. The Slayer turned around, giving the demon a /really/ nice display.

"What the hell do YOU want?," she demanded. Great. It was one of those stupid magic demons Giles hated.

It threw another fireball at her which, to her surprise, rolled harmlessly past her.

"Wow, you run outta gas?," Buffy teased. A lightning bolt did nothing except tickle her.

The demon swore, then ran for it. It didn't get far before Buffy caught up to it and dismembered it.

"Okay, feeling much of the better now," Buffy announced to the world at large.

* * *

"Now," Giles said as he started his car back up, Xander and Willow in the back seat, "what, exactly, happened tonight?"

"Welllll," Xander said, "We were kinda pissed at Snyder, so we decided to dress up like sex demons and vampires."

"But we had nothing to do with the changing into the costumes," Willow added hurriedly. "All we know is that we rented them from Ethan's Costume Shoppe."

"I found that it wasn't your fault," Giles confirmed. "Ethan's Costume Shoppe was, in fact, run by Ethan Rayne. Ethan is an evil little toad who will shortly be taken charge of by the Watcher's Council."

"I had a pretty good night," Xander grinned.

Giles sniffed, winding down the window. "So I can smell. Willow, I sincerely hope that you're sitting on that towel as well, or the two of you will be cleaning blood, semen and other bodily fluids off my back seat. The rest of Sunnydale was not as fortunate. Several people have been ripped apart by their own possessed children."

That knocked the teenagers wordless.

"STOP!," Xander yelled, seeing something ahead with his still-slitted pupils. Giles slammed on the brakes.

A manhole cover rose from the road ahead, falling over onto the tarmac. A blonde, green painted Slayer pulled herself out of the sewer system, then looked dazedly at the headlights.

* * *

Post-fic comments:

Hopefully answered a few questions in this.