On the request of reviewers here are the warnings. Incest for now, slash for sure. I forgot the disclaimer so here goes. I don't own anything except the plot and the story itself. Supernatural belongs to the WB and whoever else. Thank you.
How am I suppose to live without you? Chapter One
You are my brother but you are also my life. I used to care for her but she is dead and you are alive and here with me. I don't care if it is wrong or not. All I know is that I care for you, I love you more than my life combined with yours. I want to stay with you. I hate when I'm apart. I'm jealous when you flirt with all the girls. I want to be them, to have you pay attention to me like you do to them.
I want to become a female to get your attention. I want to kiss you, to make love to you. To keep you safe, to claim you as my own and no one else's. I don't want you to leave. Stay, never leave. I know now that I can never go on without you beside me. Before I thought I could but it hurt me to leave. I met her and she filled in the need a bit but it wasn't until I saw you again that I realized. I realized that my thoughts, my feelings, my everything were with you. Had always been with you. How I ever thought any different I never will know.
I just want you to live with me. So I don't have to find out how I'm suppose to live without you.