A/N: I'm contrasting Severus and Sirius here a little bit, since we've had two chapters that show exactly what Regulus and Severus's brotherly relationship is like. You shall now have a chapter showing the real brothers and their attitudes.

There were a few things in life, Sirius found, that were easily ruined. Nice clothes, baking, and expensive drinks were some of those things. Mornings were another.

The mere sight of the first person Sirius saw in the great hall quickly destroyed what Snape hadn't managed to darken with his over-large nose. Regulus was loitering by the doorway, looking torn between going out and staying in. When Sirius entered, he took a few steps back so his back was against the wall.

"You," Sirius growled, and Regulus seemed to shrink back farther. He looked, Sirius realized dimly, like the cats he liked to chase so much as Padfoot. He knew from some rather painful experience that cornered cats did one of two things- ran for cover or scratched.

"What do you want?" Regulus asked, trying to look defiant. It didn't work, but then it never had. Sirius knew only to well that Regulus simply didn't have it in him to be defiant.

"Was about to ask you the same thing."

"Who are you, my keeper?"

Sirius said nothing to that. The correct answer was probably yes, but he'd forfeited the right long ago. "Why aren't you with your little pals, Regulus?"

"If you must know," he said, throwing his shoulders back and standing even straighter than should have been humanly possible, "I was just about to go look for Severus. He was right behind me when I entered the Great Hall, and then he vanished."

"I know where he is," Sirius said nonchalantly, sticking his hands in his pockets. "Ran into James and I on our way here."

Regulus's eyes narrowed visibly, "If you've done anything to him, Sirius, I swear I'll…"

"Hey! Don't get your underwear in a bunch we didn't do anything. In fact, he's the one that dragged James off to talk!" When had Regulus gotten to be so threatening? Better yet, when had he started to care about Snape?

Thinking back, Sirius realized that this was not new. Though not usually so upfront about it, Regulus had always pleaded with him to leave Snape alone. Sirius's eyes widened in realization before narrowing in disgust. "That's it isn't it? Why you really can't love James. You're in love with Snivellus?"

Regulus stared at him for a moment as though he'd gone completely insane, and then started to laugh. Some of the Gryffindors sitting at the nearest table turned to look at them, and Sirius felt his face getting very warm indeed, which soured his mood even further.

"Well," he demanded, "that's it, isn't it?"

"You're thicker than I thought," Regulus said, still grinning. "I can't be in love with Severus. He's my brother."

"He is not, I am!" Sirius didn't know what made him say that, and he really couldn't pin why it hurt that Regulus had said that. The whole conversation was giving a rather horrible sense of déjà vu.

He'd said something like this to Regulus before, years ago, about James. About how James had been and would always be the only brother he'd ever had. Is this what Regulus had felt then? Like a small and secret part of him had suddenly been forcibly dragged into the open and stabbed?

Regulus's eyes had narrowed and the grin vanished. "Brothers, as you so often remind me, care about each other. They stand up for each other, and help one another. They matter to each other. If I died tomorrow the only thought you'd spare me would be how nice it was of me to do that as it solves all your little problems."

Sirius stared at him, mouth hanging open, trying to decide which hurt worse- the fact that Regulus had said that or the fact that it was quite possibly true. Finding nothing to say in response, Sirius closed his mouth feeling rather like a goldfish.

Regulus wasn't standing against the wall any more, and in fact looked almost threatening as his blue eyes glittered out of his suddenly pale face. Had it been anyone but his little brother staring at him like that, Sirius might have been tempted to take a few steps back.

"Just because," Regulus said in a low voice, "you refuse to acknowledge my existence doesn't mean I stop existing, Sirius. You're not in charge of me. I don't give a damn what you think. I stopped listening to you long ago. It's not up to you to decide who my friends are- who my brother is. You can't decide who I love."

"I'm your brother, and I know what's best for you!" The protest sounded lame, even to Sirius, and something in Regulus seemed to break. His eyes went from shining with anger to the same dead look of yesterday.

"Try that again when you actually know who I am."

Pushing off the wall, Regulus made his way to the Slytherin table. Sirius could only stare after him numbly. What was that supposed to mean?

Of course he knew Regulus. He'd known the boy all his life, after all. He knew that Regulus was the exact little monster his parents had wanted him to be. Knew he was a cheater, a Slytherin, a Death Eater in training, and all those hundreds of other things Sirius loved to hate. He was a monster, a coward, and liar…

Except monsters didn't feel. Monsters didn't have friends. They certainly didn't have brothers.

Something his mother had told him long ago, the only thing she'd ever said that had stuck with him, came to his mind. He'd been five, and afraid of the monsters in his closet. She had taken him into her arms, they had been loving then, and told him that the monsters only existed for as long as he believed they were real.

"You honestly think I don't want you see it? You think I didn't spend years looking for some kind of goodness in him? You think I WANT my brother to be a Death Eater?"

"Maybe! Because then you can feel all noble. Then you can excuse that you left him when you ran away. Then you can feel like you are truly the only Black worth a damn!"

Lily's words echoed oddly in his head as he slumped into his seat between Remus and Peter- both of whom were pretending not to have heard what Regulus said.

Was she right? Had he spent all this time turning Regulus into a monster to avoid seeing what he'd done? To justify the way he had treated him?

Looking across the hall, Sirius could see Regulus sitting with the other Slytherins. Sitting with them…but not interacting with them. The seats on either side of him were empty, and they didn't talk to him. For the first time, Sirius wondered how lonely his brother must be.

What would it be like, to be in a house where they had expectations for you? Where you couldn't be sure who was your friend and who was using you? Where you had to prove you where worth something because being a human being wasn't worth a damn?

What was it like to know that you're older brother treated you the same way as everyone else?

Sirius wasn't hungry any more. He doubted he would ever be hungry again as long as the situation remained this clear. Regulus wasn't a monster. Sirius had made him one in order to avoid seeing the real monster. Himself.