Summary: Plan! Argue and fight until you come out on top!

Crossover: Bastard!!, Slayers

Disclaimer: I don't own Bastard!!, Slayers, Hellsing, or Buffy the Vampire Shagger. Although, if the respective owners want to swap for a couple of CDs that's fine.

Feedback: Yeah, baby!

Pre-fic Comments:

It was somewhat difficult, picking some of these. Some will be a surprise, some won't.

* * *

Buffy munched on another piece of popcorn on her armchair. "Y'know, I was starting to think that this anime stuff was trash, until you showed me this."

Xander shrugged from where he was sitting on the sofa with Faith. "It's practically the Slayer's Handbook on video, except for the non demonic vamps."

"And the vampires fighting for Hellsing," Willow added. She was sitting on the floor, in front of the TV.

"Integra was cool," Buffy said, as the episode finished. "Kinda like me -- she has her own vampire to order around, I've got Angel, she's got that British dude to do the bookwork, I've got Giles..."

They had camped out in the video room at school -- Giles had booked it for them, ostenably so that they could watch a video on bagpipes or something.

"She's nothing like you," Faith snorted. "She's wicked hard."

"Are you saying I'm soft?," Buffy challenged. "Come over here and say that!"

Xander pulled Faith down onto his lap as the dark haired Slayer started to get up. "Easy there, we don't wanna see if like repells."

"They aren't magnets, Xander," Willow pointed out.

He shrugged. "Anyone got any plans for Halloween?"

"I raise Hell," Faith immediately said.

"I'm staying home," the blonde Slayer shrugged. "My night off!"

"I thought that Halloween'd be a vamp scareapalooza," Xander observed.

"Nope, it's dead quiet on Halloween," Faith said as Willow changed the videotape. "They all stay home. So I'm gonna have fun egging Queen C's house."

"What about your costume?," Xander asked.

"Naga the White Serpent," Faith immediately said.

"The sorceress chick that wears a bikini with a cloak in Slayers?," Xander asked, wanting to be sure.

"Yeah!"

"I'll go as Dark Schneider then, so we'll match," Xander said. "I've got a spell somewhere to make my hair longer, and I can bleach it to silver."

"Wicked cool," Faith smirked. "Red? B?"

Willow looked up from her book, 'Readings in Chemistry'. "Costume? Uh, I didn't have anything planned. I'll go... as... a... ghost! Yeah, because it's Halloween, and ghosts are spooky!"

Faith handed Willow some popcorn, then ruffled her hair.

"Hey!"

"Red, you're going to be dressed up and lovin' it, got me?"

Willow's cheeks tinged themselves red. She still saw herself as the class nerd, and Faith had that whole 'bad girl' thing going for her that Willow really admired.

"Okay," the hacker squeaked. Her voice gained power on the next sentence. "But I'm not going as a stripper!"

"That's fine," Faith shrugged. "Go as that Ranma guy -- in chick form. You've got the hair for it."

"Okay," Willow squeaked. They'd watched a few eps of 'Ranma 1/2' before watching the first few eps of 'Hellsing'. Willow could live with wearing a red silk shirt, black pants, and slippers.

"Buffster?," Xander asked.

"I'm staying home and veging out," Buffy said resolutely. "I've gotten Titanic, The Princess Bride, and The Italian Job out from Blockbuster, and I am going to watch them."

"What might you four be doing in the video room after school has finished?," a familiar, unwanted voice asked. Principal Snyder.

"Watching videos," Willow said brightly. None of the titles on the tapes were visible from Snyder's viewpoint, and she was one of his star students. "Mr Giles, the Librarian, booked it for us."

"Okay, then," Snyder said, disappointed. "Summers, you're on escort duty for Halloween. Your mother volunteered you when she heard that Principal Skinner at the primary school needed students from high school."

Buffy looked heartbroken. The other three made a note to NEVER cross Joyce Summers.

"As for the rest of you," Snyder said, surveying Faith, Xander, and Willow, "I'm sure that you had planned on egging houses, vandalism, one cry for help after another."

Faith paled. How did that troll find out?

"Not this year. This year, you too are fulfilling your social responsibilities."

Faith raised her hand tentatively. "Uh, I kinda already like had plans..."

Snyder shoved his clipboard at her. "Sign."

The dark haired Slayer signed reflexively before she realised what she was doing. Xander and Willow sighed and did likewise. Once the repulsive principal had left, all four groaned in mutual depression.

"This is gonna suck worse than Phys Ed!," Xander complained.

* * *

Buffy crouched in her green suit to talk to the children, before Snyder happened along.

"Aaaa! The last thing they need is your influence, Summers. Bring them back intact and I might not expel you."

He continued along to Faith and Xander. Snyder had taken one look at the almost exposed Faith and immediately taped her long black cloak shut. Xander had passed muster, with his cloak, jeans, and long shirt.

"Bring them back in one piece, Harris, or you'll be scrubbing floors until you're older than me."

Xander flipped a salute at Snyder as the short principal moved on to Willow, clad in her silk shirt, pants and slippers.

* * *

Post-fic Comments:

Okay, some info links.

Naga:

Ranma:

Dark Scheider:

Integra Hellsing: (She isn't really that much like Buffy. Buffy would just like to think so.)