I just wanted to give a quick shout out too every one who's reviewed so far! you guys really kept me going. especially all the death threats and claims of turning my parents into weapons and killing me with them. thanks a lot guys!

Also, real quick. I decided to add a charecter from the Comic Craka Smaka. If you've never read it before, you should! It is awsome! Do what ever you have to do to get a copy of it ASAP! It will change your life!

"I got another one sir!" Jimmie said swinging the turret to start firing at another enemy ghost.

"Shut the fuck up, Private!" Johnson swerved to avoid not crashing into a ghost.

"Yes Sir, SJ! Just wanted to let you know I'm doing my part to pwn the Covenant!"

"You call that pwning Covenant!" Sergeant Johnson threw a grenade in front of his own hog. When it exploded, it sent the hog flying into the air and smashing into a covenant banshee. After several mid air flips, it landed back on the ground/2-3 unlucky grunts. "That is pwning the Covenant. Try not to mistake the two again!"

"Yes Sir!"

The sergeant slammed on the breaks when they got to the entrance of the tunnel. As soon as the car stopped, Private Jimmie charged ahead with his rockets determined to prove to Sgt. Johnson that he could pwn Covenant.

"There goes the bravest/stupidest soldier this army has to offer."

"I thought we were in the marines…" the chick said, lifting her head from Sgt. Johnson's namesake.

"Did I say you were done yet, bitch? Get back to work!"

"Holy shit, Jimmie. What the FUCK were you thinking?"

"What, Sir? I thought you wanted all the Covenant dead."

"Your damn right I want them dead! But by my hands!" Sgt. Johnson was thoroughly PO'ed by this turn of events. "How did you even manage to do this?"

"Sir! I did as you told us too. I 'charged there turrets and shoot them with rockets at extreme close range' exactly as you laid out in the training manual." Jimmie held up a pamphlet labeled 'How Crakas should "kill" Covenant'. "I have to say though sir; I felt it was a bit racist for the Corps to only give these out to the white troops."

Jimmie and Sgt. Johnson walked through the tunnel until they met up with the other troops. You know the ones with the shotgun. Yeah, them.

"So, what ever happened to that female marine from earlier, Sir?"

"Oh, her? I sent her home."

"WHAT? But, why Sir?"

"Son, I don't let pregnant women fight in this army!"

A second female marine ran up the sergeant holding a shotgun. "It's tight quarters on the other side, Sir. Use this."

Sergeant Johnson stared at the marine. "You want me to trade my sniper rifle… for that piece of CRAP!"

"But Sir! The enemy will be at close range! What will you do if the enemy gets up close and you don't have time to zoom in on them?"

"…"

(If you don't know what happened next… go fuck yourself.)

"Jesus, Sir! Did you have to kill all are allies?"

"It's a matter of principle, Jimmie. If I leave any survivors, then people may think that I won't kill them when they ask stupid questions."

After several minuets of Sgt. Johnson no-scoping, beating down, and somehow getting a splatter medal by combining his foot with an Elite's ass, they made it through the underground tunnel. That tunnel led out into a huge open area, where a single jackal guarded the exit.

"All right, Sir. If we sneak up on this jackal we may be able to save some ammo and-"

Sgt. Johnson emptied an entire clip into the Jackal's face. It died of a heart attack before Johnson fired.

"I really should have seen that one coming…"

All at once, every Covenant in the area began shooting at the sergeant and Jimmie. The two ran and hid behind a rock, until sergeant Johnson remembered who he was and ended every non-humans life in the vicinity (plus a few human ones).

Un-FUCKING-believable!

"Wha? I'm just now gettin that?"

"I'm pretty sure most of your kills were on allies and innocent civilians, Sir."

"Your damn right they were! Now, let's steal this dumb son-of-a-bitch's Hog and get out of here."

A dumb son-of-a-bitch drove up to where Sergeant Johnson was standing.

"'Could use you on the gun, Sir."

Sergeant Johnson, boarded his ally's vehicle, threw him out of the driver seat, and beat his ass down… For no reason.

Checkpoint…