Title: What Lies Within Us

Chp. 2 Reacquainted With the Past

Disclaimer: I don't own nor am I associated with Gilmore Girls. I bet you are all shocked.

Introduction: I know I'm delusional….but Trory. Well, obviously not at first because that would be too easy, but I wanted to clarify. Basically set in the present, slightly altered to make things work.

Rating: Pg-13. For now. It's the way I am with fanfic, the rating will raise.

Author's note: I hate reviews (I'm also a really bad liar).
Oh, and just to make note from one of the reviews I received, I can't guarantee what will happen but cannot make Logan an amazing character as they obviously need a reason to break up.

"Rory?" His voice was as shocked as hers as he got to his feet. Tristan looked past her to Logan, "You're dating him?" It was not the first thing she expected to hear out of his mouth, nor did it look like he had planned on saying it.

"Thanks for the compliment," Logan said dryly, not really upset by his friends comment, throwing his arm around Rory. "I take it that you two have met before?"

"We...ah...went to the same high school. Chilton. " Rory said by way of explanation, still shocked to see Tristan standing there. She hadn't seen him since then.

"Before he got shipped off to soldier school then?" Logan laughed, "Still can't believe that Dugrey here spent time in a military facility without committing suicide, but stranger things have happened."

He looked different than he had those years ago. She didn't know what she had expected. Perhaps a practically shaved head characteristic of what she associated with the military, even though he would have graduated a year ago. But his hair was similar to what it always had been, short but not buzzed. It was more than he looked older and no longer had that devil-may-care attitude about him. There was a scar on his right cheek. Light and obscure, but it was still there and obviously from something more than a shaving cut. There was a slight stubble on his cheeks, a change to her as she remembered him clean-shaven.

"How've you been Rory?" his voice was clearer now, as if he'd gotten over his initial surprise. It was a deeper voice too. She knew it had been a long time, but she couldn't help but be reminded of the way he had used to call her 'Mary' every second sentence.

"Good," she wasn't sure what else to say. It's not as if they'd been best friends when he'd left, or they'd kept in contact since. She doubted he wanted to hear her whole life story from the past couple years. "You?"

"Good," she caught him saying it with a faint smile. It was as if he realized her discomfort, and didn't know what to say either, "Fine." He added that last part after the fact as if it were somehow a more interesting response.

"You two are scintillating conversationalists," Logan told them, taking his arm from around Rory and going to flop down on the couch. After a moment of indecision, Rory went and joined him. Tristan looked uncomfortable, finally opting to sit on the floor. "Before he showed up at my door yesterday, I haven't seen Tristan since he came home for the summer after graduation from military school, when I had just finished my first year of university. Our parents live not too far from each other. I think you were about, what, a week at your parents house before taking off again?"

"Yeah, I wasn't there long," Rory could hear the tension in his voice as he said those words, not elaborating. Obviously his parents were a touchy subject, and one he wanted to avoid.

"So," she cleared her throat, wanting to break in and ease the moment, "What have you been doing since high school? Are you transferring from another university?"

"I did a tour of duty," he explained simply. "I'm just starting school here next term. I'm getting a place in residence in January when someone else leaves, but for now Logan's been kind enough to put me up."

She couldn't actually picture Tristan as a real soldier. Military school was one thing, but he had been forced there by his father, like most troublemakers. But him willingly joining the service was something she couldn't reconcile with the boy she had known. She tried not to let her shock show on her face, but she could tell Tristan noticed, and she felt a twinge of regret at her response.

Logan rubbed her shoulder gently. Rory was a little surprised as he wasn't usually given to public displays of tender affection. Making out was one thing, but real intimacy was another. "Listen Rory, I wasn't expecting you so early…"

"I know to the two of you noon is practically the middle of the night," she turned to him, giving him a smile. "I wanted to catch you while Finn was still in bed."

Logan wiggled his eyebrows suggestively and she laughed, "Not for that reason idiot. Wanted to see you so you wouldn't feel neglected when I had to start seriously studying for finals."

"Such an affectionate girlfriend, viewing visiting me as a duty. But, what I was trying to say was, I have a meeting with a professor right away. Seems since I didn't actually write the midterm or come to most classes she doesn't want me to write the final. I'm going to make her see the error of her ways. Would you mind if I left you here with Tristan for awhile? I shouldn't be long, and you two can catch up, or sit here and stare at each other for that matter, I don't care which."

"No problem," Rory said easily, having no doubt Logan would be back quickly with the professor's permission to write the final. Nobody seemed to say no to him. Besides, what else was she supposed to say? 'Don't leave me alone with Tristan because it will be awkward?'

And no doubt trying to talk to him would be awkward. It was often uncomfortable enough running into someone you had been close friends with after a long period of time, or making polite chit-chat with a complete stranger. Weirder still to try and make conversation with someone who….well, she couldn't define exactly the type of relationship or lack thereof she had enjoyed with Tristan in the past.

"I'll see you soon," Logan promised, giving her a deep kiss as he stood up to go. He didn't tend to do things in half measures, even when they were around people. Well, she supposed he had shown restraint when he met her grandparents. And she had stepped on his foot when he had tried to kiss her in front of Lorelai.

And then she was left with Tristan.

He cleared his throat and stared at his hands. "Sorry." Was all he said, shortly.

Of all the things for him to say, that wasn't what she had expected. "Why?" she asked, astonished at his apology.

"You're at Yale, aren't you?" he replied with a weak smile, waving his arms around. "I guess that means Harvard didn't realize what they were missing and passed on you. I remember that was all you ever dreamed of."

"Oh, thanks," Rory was actually touched, "No, they, uh 'realized' and accepted me. I just decided to come here in the end. Harvard had been the dream, but I can say since coming here I haven't had any regrets. It's actually been nice to be able to go home once in awhile. So, what made you decide on Yale? Why not some other school, or West Point for that matter from the sound of things?"

He shrugged and looked uncomfortable. "I wanted to go someplace good," was all he replied with.

She heard a tone of bitterness in his voice but had no idea how to explain it. "A state university is 'good', Ivy-League is the best, buddy." She tried to keep it light, not sure what else to do.

"Conceited much?" he asked, but she could tell he was joking and she laughed.

He smiled, and she was again stricken by how much he had changed. Oh sure, there were similarities about him, but he was no longer the boy who made her life at Chilton a living hell for awhile, or got himself kicked out of school. Of course you couldn't really judge a person from a five minute conversation, but it was the impression that she got.

"What are you studying?" he asked. "Pre-med? Pre-law?" It actually seemed to be the question everyone asked her. Apparently she had missed the rule that stated everyone with smarts and ambition had to try for those two professional colleges.

Rory shook her head, "I want to go into journalism. Most of my classes have been geared towards that. Philosophy, political studies, English and all those type of subjects.."

"Lofty ambitions," he seemed impressed. "And not exactly a career with a lot of job security. Good for you."

"Well, I've had a Christine Amanpour complex for a long time now," she quipped with a smile. "So, you as a soldier, huh? I will honestly say I'm a little surprised. Where did you do your tour?"

"Afghanistan, then Iraq," he said shortly, and like so many other things, she could see it wasn't a subject he was comfortable talking about. "I got back to the States about a month ago."

"You decided what you're going to study?" she asked, not sure what to talk about as there seemed to be a lot he wanted to avoid, and school seemed a safe subject.

He shrugged, and seemed almost embarrassed to tell her. "I want to study medicine," he finally said. "I know it seems silly, but…."

"Why is it silly?" she asked, but she knew why he said that. He thought her opinion of him was still what it was in high school. It made her feel small, but she had looked down on him then. She would have said that 15 minutes ago she could not picture Tristan DuGray as a doctor, but she was trying to adjust her opinion of him as she got to know the 'new' Tristan. "I'm sure you'll make a good doctor."

He didn't say anything for awhile, and she just stared at her hands, not sure what else to say to him. It shouldn't be this awkward. She had kissed him once at a party, it's not like they'd dated or slept together.

"Paris is going here too," she said, just to break the silence. And, because she couldn't resist, "She didn't get into Harvard. We're actually living together. You remember her right?"

"It's pretty hard to forget Paris," Tristan laughed, and Rory smiled at the truth of his statement. "But I actually knew she was here. I ran into her two years ago, and we've exchanged a couple e-mails since, just to keep in touch."

"How's your mom?" he asked after a moment of silence; it was if they were covering all the pleasantries without saying anything too deep to one another.

"She's good," Rory told him, again unsure of how to answer the question, or how much he wanted to know. "She opened her own inn in town, the Dragonfly."

"And your boyfriend? I can't remember his name, Dean was it?"

Rory felt a little pang at the mention of his name. Tristan never knew about the break up, the interlude with Jess. He didn't know that Dean got married, or slept with Rory while he was married. He didn't know that that night was one of the biggest regrets of Rory's life. And, like most of the people in her life, he would never know. "We're not dating anymore," was all she left it at.

He just nodded at her reply. Nothing life-shattering in those simple words. Young couples broke up all the time. No reason to suspect the life-altering turmoil she'd gone through since. He seemed to hesitate a little, then said, "I was surprised to see you were dating Logan."

As if that hadn't been obvious. It wasn't like he was the only one. Her mother had been shocked when she had met him. Even though she rarely admitted it to herself, Rory was too. Logan was one thing as a casual friend, as a boyfriend it was different. "Oh really?" was all she vaguely replied.

"He's like me in high school except hides it in a refined demeanour," Tristan told her, "He's not your type Rory."

"Oh, and what's my type?" Rory demanded, a little annoyed with his condemnation of their relationship. It didn't help she thought the same thing half of the time. "You haven't seen me in years Tristan, you're not qualified to judge what's my type and what isn't. Logan's a good guy." And, it was true, he didn't know her anymore. She was no longer the 'Mary' she once was. And Logan had been good for her too. He had opened her up to things she wouldn't have experienced otherwise. It sounded like a flimsy excuse for dating someone, but she wanted to ignore that part.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to upset you" he replied hastily, seeming to already regret his words. "Listen, forget I said anything. Logan's been a good friend of mine for a long time. I know he's a good guy. I'm living on his couch, aren't I?"

Again, they sat in awkward silence, not looking at each other. Tristan fiddled with his watch and Rory played with her mittens she had sat on the table in front of her.

They were saved from each other when Finn walked into the room, yawning, and asked, "Who died?"

Next time: We get a peek into Tristan's world.