Title: What Lies Within Us

Chp.4 Watching, and Wondering

Disclaimer: I don't own nor am I associated with Gilmore Girls. I bet you are all shocked.

Introduction: I know I'm delusional….but Trory. Well, obviously not at first because that would be too easy, but I wanted to clarify. Basically set in the present, slightly altered to make things work.

Rating: Pg-14 Slightly higher for this chapter due to somewhat sexual situations (just to be careful, I'm warning, even though it isn't much.)

Author's note: I hate reviews (I'm also a really bad liar).

Rory walked out of her political studies final, exhausted and depressed. She would never understand why professors felt the need to try and kill students on the final. Three hour exams were stressful enough without the added stress of material that they had never seen before.

She was surprised to see Logan waiting there for her. "How'd it go?" he asked, wrapping his arm around her.

"Like crap," she admitted, gratefully leaning on his shoulder for a moment before pulling away. "I love sitting in the middle of a final, seeing all your career dreams going up in flames…."

He just laughed, which made her momentarily want to smack him which proved what a great mood she was in. "Relax Rory. I don't think it's physically possible to study any more than you do, as I noticed during your complete neglect of me at times. Therefore, on the off chance you actually somehow managed to do poorly, the marks will be curved as everyone else did worse than you."

"We'll see," was all she said, wanting to forget about this for a little while at least. "So, what are you doing here?"

"I can't just come to support and be close to my amazing girlfriend?" he asked innocently, holding her hand as they walked from the room, surprising Rory as while Logan was comfortable sucking tonsils in public he wasn't given to tender public displays of affection.

"You? No." she replied doubtfully, stopping to look up at him.

He laughed, "Well, it's not like I have a sinister ulterior motive here. I just wanted to catch you before you went to the library or some other godforsaken place to study. You see, you have this habit of turning off your phone which cuts of all contact."

"It's called 'being productive'," she replied sarcastically, pulling on her jacket as they reached the doors of the building.

"Anyway," he said, wrapping her scarf around her neck for her. "I wanted to see if you would deign to join me for supper this evening. Real food, in a real restaurant. Not the coffee and junk food you've been existing on for the past couple days."

She pretended to think about it, but only for a moment as she felt guilty for neglecting him for so long. "Allright. I'll have to make it an early night though, but that sounds like a good idea. I need some coffee as a pick me up now though."

Logan smiled, and still didn't let go of her scarf, "I have an idea," he said wickedly, pulling her closer with the outerwear, "Until then why don't we go back to your place and 'catch up' a little?"

Rory blushed, as she always did, it was still an ingrained response. "As lovely as it sounds," she kissed him gently before pushing him away, "Paris is studying at our place."

He smiled, "We'll be in your room Rory, not hers."

She rolled her eyes, "Logan, I'm sorry, but I won't be interrupted during any 'catching up' we're doing by her coming in to get quizzed or debate a philosophical issue. Doesn't really set the mood does it?"

He shrugged, opening the door for her so they could slip out into the cold weather. "I don't know, I find that studying turns me on. And 'studying' with two girls…."

She just laughed, taking it as a joke. She knew he would have no problem doing anything at her place, but she would. The fear of someone walking in on them didn't do it for her. Especially when she knew Paris would as she was oblivious to everything else when she was studying.

"Ok, compromise," he said, wrapping an arm around her. "You'll go grab some clothes from your place to go for supper, and we'll go back to my place for a bit. I need some non public time with you Rory."

"Agreed," she said, kissing him gently.

"I've missed doing this while you were studying and ignoring me," he said, right before he ran his lips down her collarbone. "And I imagine I'll be missing it again soon."

Rory just moaned softly, as his lips made there way back to her mouth. She had no answer for him. She felt bad whenever she had to put him off to study. But this was her life. School would get her where she wanted to go. She knew studying hard wasn't his philosophy, but it was her and she couldn't change it.

He gently pulled her shirt the rest of the way off her shoulders, and gently trailed his lips down lower again, teasing her before moving back up to her mouth and wrapping his hands in her hair.

She opened her mouth wider, allowing his tongue to slide in to play with hers. His shirt was off and she allowed her hand to rest on his chest. Devoid of hair, it was smooth to the touch. When he pulled away slightly, she ran her hand over him, pressing some points she had learned he liked. He smiled, and gently cupped her breast, causing her to moan slightly again.

But when his hand moved to the snap on her jeans, she stopped him as she always did.

"Logan…," she said on a sigh, straightening her shirt and pulling slightly away. Every time he tried to take the petting further, and every time she had rebuffed his advances. She didn't want to be a tease, but she had been clear from the beginning.

He didn't say anything, but she knew he wanted to. He'd said it all before. She'd been honest with him, she'd told him about Dean; it seemed wrong not to. Maybe it was just a stereotypical male response to think along the lines of 'if you did it with him you can do it with me'. She regretted having done it with Dean, and she certainly wasn't going to sleep with some guy she had dated for only a month. But, sometimes deep down she wondered if maybe he had a point, no matter how much she hated it when he brought it up. Logan was never mean about it, and somehow that made her feel worse. At least if he constantly complained, or tried to force her, she could place blame on his head as being the bad guy. But he was never cruel about it, and that just made her feel guilty because every time they were together she knew where he wanted it to lead. It's why they had gone as far as they did, so fast.

She looked at the clock beside his bed, and noted the time. "You should get ready to go for supper," was all she said, avoiding the issue at hand like she tended to do as she buttoned up the last couple buttons on her blouse. "I'm going to go straighten up in the washroom." And she left him lying there as she slipped out of the room and closed the door behind her.

When she turned around, Tristan was sitting there on the couch. She didn't know why it still shocked her. She should remember he was effectively living here for now, but he tended to be gone a lot when she was here alone with Logan. She should technically be grateful for that, but felt bad he had to find somewhere to go just to give them some privacy because that's what she knew it was. He didn't really have many friends here yet.

Rory didn't know how, but she could tell in his glance that he took in her tussled appearance and knew what it meant. "Hi Rory," was all he said casually as she felt the blush begin to burn in her cheeks. He hadn't known they were in there.

"Hello Tristan," she replied, opting to pretend nothing was unusual. And really, nothing was. Logan was her committed boyfriend and it was the 21st century. It didn't make her a slut being alone in his room with him. There was nothing to feel apologetic for. "How are you?"

"Bored," he replied honestly, putting down the book he had been reading. The Broker by John Grisham. Dostoevsky it wasn't, but she wasn't a literature snob. Well, at least not too much of one. "I've never had this much free time in my life before."

"I'd trade you that free time for never ending studying," she sighed. She saw him glance at her chest and then away, and she wasn't sure whether to be insulted he looked, or feel bad he didn't see anything worth looking at. Then she looked down herself and realized she had buttoned her blouse incorrectly and her pink bra was showing. She wasn't sure the blush on her face could get any brighter. Trying to do it as calmly as possible, she quickly buttoned up her blouse correctly.

"You'll have the place to yourself if Finn isn't here," she kept talking, trying to cover her embarrassment. "We're going out for supper. Logan's just getting changed, and I'm going to freshen up." But she felt bad, leaving him there all alone. "Actually, did you want to come Tristan? Like you said, you must be bored out of her mind."

He shook his head, looking bemused. "Don't feel bad for me Rory. I'm a big boy. I can handle some time all by my lonesome. I don't think Logan, or you, would appreciate the third wheel on your date tonight."

"Oh, we wouldn't…"

"Rory, don't worry about me. Go have dinner with your boyfriend" She had wanted to reassure him, but he cut her off. In truth, she knew Logan would be annoyed. And he would have a right, even if Tristan was a good friend. She supposed she shouldn't worry too much. It was still Tristan. If he tried, he could probably get a couple dates just by walking across campus.

She just smiled and walked into the washroom. She looked in the mirror only to see that her lipstick was smeared from kissing Logan, and her hair was still extremely messed. The exact image she must have presented to Tristan.

Rory didn't know why it bothered her to much what Tristan thought of her. And, she wasn't sure why she felt guilty for doing stuff with her legitimate boyfriend. With his past, he would be the last one qualified to make judgements, but she still didn't want to advertise. It just seemed that every time she kissed Logan in front of him, she felt like she was doing what he had done when he used to make out with those girls in front of her locker.

Tristan's thoughts about Rory were far from judgemental. Lately, as he had been forced to see her and Logan together, he had been bothered from a slight feeling of jealously. Initially, he hadn't been sure if it was jealousy simply that they had a close relationship that he didn't, or jealousy specifically over Rory. Either way, he tended to make himself scarce when they were over here, not wanting to watch the two of them together.

But tonight when she had walked out of Logan's room, he knew that part of his problem that he was attracted to her all over again. It was the same as when they were in high school; of course then he hadn't really accepted his feelings for her at all, or known how to act on them. Logically, he knew there were plenty of girls outwardly prettier than her, maybe even girls smarter. But, it was the package that was her he was attracted to again. He had never known anyone that self-assured. Since he had been here they had plenty of interaction, both with Logan and without as he tended to be out a lot when she stopped by, and he was reminded of all the things about her that were good.

Deep down, so deep that he wouldn't admit it to himself, was the fact he was bothered that she was sleeping with Logan. He had sort of deluded himself on that one until he had seen her state of disarray coming out of Logan's room. It wasn't that he begrudged her sleeping with her boyfriend; it was more that he had figured Rory to be too smart to fall for Logan's lines. Truly, he wasn't a bad guy, he just wasn't someone who wouldn't commit to monogamy. He supposed maybe Logan had changed, they hadn't been close in years; if Tristan could, anything was possible. Hopefully with Rory it would be different.

Tristan knew that nothing would come of it. He wasn't going to act on his attraction. Logan was the closest thing to a friend that he had and he would never screw him over that way. And he knew Rory wouldn't look at him twice in that capacity, as more than a friend of her boyfriends.

But that didn't stop hismind from wondering every once in awhile.

Logan came out of the room, and Tristan forced his thoughts from his friend's girlfriend and back to the book he was attempting to read. Literature still really wasn't his thing, but he could deal with mindless fiction to pass the time.

"You guys going out?" he asked casually, as Logan finished putting on his tie.

"Supper," Logan explained in the typical short way of the male species. And Tristan just nodded.

Rory came out of the bathroom, straightened up with makeup reapplied. Tristan knew he would know live with the image of her tussled after sex for a long time to come now. He felt like a fucking voyeur. She smiled at the two of them, avoiding Tristan's eyes as Logan passed her jacket to her.

"Get a life," were Logan's jesting parting words as he opened the door to leave, and Tristan rolled his eyes and threw a pencil at him which made Logan laugh.

"Bye Tristan," Rory said as she followed Logan out the door; even he could see she was blushing from the couch. He didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable in her own space, but knew he couldn't change what happened earlier. He would just have to be more careful to be gone when they were here together, to save all of them embarrassment. It wasn't like he had a room to escape too.

He tried to immerse himself in the book for awhile longer, for lack of better entertainment, but knew it was futile as he just wasn't in the mood. Leaning over, he rummaged around in his duffel bag for his discman in an attempt to do something to keep him occupied. But, just as he slipped on his headphones the phone rang.

Logan had never said anything about answering the phone, but Tristan figured as long as he was here he might as well make himself useful as a living answering machine. "Hello," he answered, going to grab the portable phone that had been left in Finn's room.

"Hello, Logan?" the woman on the other end asked.

"Logan's not in right now," Tristan balanced the phone under his chin as he searched for anything to write with, "Can I take a message for him?"

She hesitated for a moment, "Well, nothing important….just tell him Laurie Chambert called, and he can try me back. The number is 222-8840."

"Got it," Tristan said, scribbling the number on a napkin with a highlighter he had found laying around, and they both hung up.

Pinning the message to the wall by Logan's room, he thought nothing of it.