Raising Ryan
Chapter 21 – Moving OnTime marched on and Ryan found falling into step with his new, well-adjusted self rather easy to do. A charity function he was attending that evening with Sami proved he'd crossed the line into the new world.
"Kirsten? Kirsten!"
"In here Ryan." Kirsten listened to Ryan's frantic steps coming down the hallway, his dress shoes echoing against the tiled floor. "What's wrong?"
Flying up the stairs into her bedroom, "There's no buttons on the cuffs of this shirt! Neither one! I can't wear this tonight, Sami is going to be all decked out!"
"Okay, okay, calm down. First of all, there's nothing wrong with that shirt honey, you need cuff links."
"What?"
"Cuff links. Here." Reaching into Sandy's jewelry box, she retrieved a set of fancy cuff links.
"Um, I don't think I should take those. They're Sandy's."
"Oh, he's got lots of them, he won't even know they're gone."
Ryan still wasn't keen on the idea of walking off with Sandy's cuff links and Kirsten figured she had the answer to his problem.
"Here, take these, go down stairs, tell Sandy I want you to wear these tonight and ask him if it's okay. Alright?"
"Okay."
This little fashion emergency was causing them to leave the house later than they should have and Ryan was anxious to get to Sami. Grabbing the cuff links he hurried back downstairs to Sandy.
"Well don't you look sharp," Sandy bragged.
"Yeah, well, almost. Kirsten said I need to wear these, but, they're yours so I thought…"
"Those will look great. Here, let me show you how they work."
Ryan passed the cuff links to Sandy. Internally he was worried maybe Sandy wouldn't want him using his things, but as usual, Sandy was all too happy to let Ryan borrow them. Holding out his arm, he watched Sandy work the cuff link.
"They go in like this and they keep your cuff together," Sandy explained. "Now, they should stay in but on occasion I have lost one, or both. If that happens, don't worry about it. Between you and me, I'd rather have regular buttons on my cuffs anyway. And if one should get lost, I'm sure Kirsten would love the opportunity to go shopping for more of…well, what none of us guys really want to wear."
Chuckling, "These are a little weird. Thanks though."
"Any time kid. Do me a favor, yell up the stairs to Kirsten that it's getting late. We need to get going."
A short car ride later, they all piled out in front of the Ocean View Country Club ballroom. Staying with his family, Ryan eyed the gathering room for Sami. Since they'd arrived a little bit late, he'd assumed she was already inside. He waited patiently through greetings and watched Seth rolling his eyes after each introduction.
"This is so lame," Seth complained. "Why couldn't we just stay home, invite napkin girl over, order a pizza and play a little PS2?"
The comment amused Ryan. "You wouldn't mind napkin girl infringing on Seth/Ryan time?"
"No, that's cool. I like napkin girl. She's nice."
"We need to get you a girl," Ryan said flatly. "Then the four of us could hang out."
"Yeah, good luck with that Ryan."
"Come on man, there's lots of girls here. For starters, girls like this sort of stuff. You have to at least pretend like you want to be here. Show some interest."
"Who are you?" Seth mocked sarcastically. "The Prince of Chino has graduated to telling me how to behave at a Newport charity function? Oh that's rich Ryan."
It did seem a little ridiculous and Ryan laughed at himself. "Fuck you! All I'm saying is, if you took an interest, maybe a girl would take an interest in you. I met Sami because I was handing out programs. What have you got to lose?"
Seth considered Ryan's theory. He was right. Ryan usually enjoyed being the hunter, but Sami is the one that did the tracking in that relationship. Maybe it could work.
"Okay, so what do I do?"
"You're killing me Seth!"
"Come on! Just tell me what to do. You're the expert, just send me off in a certain direction and I'll either, you know, achieve greatness or fail miserably, which is my bet by the way."
"Alright look, just walk through the hall and see if there's a girl you think you'd like to talk to. Watch her for a few minutes to make sure she doesn't already have a date. The last thing you need is some guy on an ego trip because he sees you talking to his girl. Then just go up to her, ask her if she wants a drink from the bar or something."
Nodding, "Sounds simple enough."
"It is. Just try it."
By the time the boys had initiated Seth's 'get a date' plan, they'd moved through the lobby and into the ballroom. Ryan still hadn't caught sight of Sami, but he did notice her Mom approaching.
"Hi Ryan," she greeted offering him a hug. "Sami was starting to worry about you."
"I know I'm late. I had trouble with, um, my cuff links."
"Ah," she smiled. "I know how you guys hate to wear those. Sami's Dad hates them too. Well, I'm glad you're here. Sami ran to the Ladies to freshen up a bit. She should be back soon. We're sitting at table 13, so you know where to find her."
"Thanks."
With a pat on Ryan's arm, she went back to circulating through the party.
"Wow. Even napkin girl's Mom likes you," Seth observed out loud.
"Shut up. Did you find a prospect yet?"
"A what?"
"A girl, Seth."
"Oh. No."
Ryan scanned the party. "What about that one in the red dress, next to the fountain?"
"Noooo Ryan, no red dresses."
Turning his head painfully slow in Seth's direction, "Why not?" he questioned through clenched teeth.
"Because Ryan. Red is, is feisty and fiery and all that that entails. I'm at the beginner level Ryan. I'm at like the chocolate brown, forest green level."
"Seth, it's just a dress."
Turning to Ryan, "Did you ever spend the night with a girl in Chino, who happened to be wearing red?"
Ryan thought on that for a moment. "You're right. You're not ready for red."
"I told you."
Both boys searched the ballroom for a worthy candidate with Ryan finally locating a girl, nice but casually dressed, standing near the French doors.
"There. That one. Go over to her. Good luck." With a slap on the back, Ryan sent Seth off to make or break his evening.
Thinking now was a good time to grab a drink, Ryan spun around to locate the nearest bar. In the process, his line of vision landed on Shelly. Shelly Sampson to be exact. She was sitting at a banquet table all alone. She was nicely dressed, even with her now obviously pregnant belly sticking out. With no smile in sight, she gave a single wave of acknowledgement to Ryan.
He wasn't sure what propelled his legs in her direction but Ryan found himself approaching Shelly's table.
"Hey," he mumbled.
"Hi. You look really nice," she complimented.
Ryan knew plenty of girls back in Chino who'd been knocked up, but not one of them ever claimed he was the father of their kid. The awkward moment continued as they both struggled for something to say. It was about this time Ryan wished all he'd done was return the wave and headed straight to the bar.
"So, you and Samantha…you guys look good together. You look happy."
It surprised Ryan to learn she'd been paying attention. Even though she wasn't at his school any more, surely she'd seen them together at several of the community functions. Funny, after their confrontation, Ryan tuned her out altogether. Before today, he never even noticed Shelly.
"Thanks," he stammered. "And, what about…" His words trailed off with the flip of his hand, his eyes trailing down to her belly.
"Oh, he's long gone. Doesn't want anything to do with either of us." Her cheeks reddened with the embarrassment of real life consequences. "Look, Ryan, I just…I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am…for what I put you through. I don't think I ever really said it. You didn't deserve that. I'm sorry."
Ryan nodded slowly.
"Ryan, there you are."
Sami's face was never a happier sight and Ryan was thankful for the interruption. All smiles as usual, Sami walked up and planted a quick kiss on Ryan's lips before turning to acknowledge Shelly.
"Oh hello. I don't believe we've met, I'm Sami."
Embarrassed by the kindness of Ryan's girlfriend, Shelly extended her arm, her face reddening all over again. "I'm, I'm Shelly," she stuttered.
"It's nice to meet you. So, how do you and Ryan know each other?" Sami inquired innocently enough.
Shelly's face went pale. She didn't want this girl, Ryan's girl, to know the truth. "Um, well, I…I…"
Ryan didn't want that can of worms opened either. "Shelly and I used to be lab partners, at Harbor. But…she had to transfer out when the school found out about the baby."
"Oh that's terrible. You would think they would encourage you to finish school. I'm sorry to hear that. I'm sure you'll be a great Mom."
Shelly didn't hear much of what Sami said. She was too engrossed by Ryan's cover story. After what she did to him, he wasn't running around town blabbing it to everyone. He wasn't rubbing it in her face. He really was a classy guy, clearly out of her league. She didn't deserve him.
Before there was another opportunity to have another awkward moment, the host of the banquet made an announcement for everyone to take their seats, the meal would begin soon.
"It was nice to meet you Shelly, enjoy your evening." Just as warmly as she'd greeted her, Sami bid farewell. "Ryan, walk me back to my table?"
"Sure." With Sami facing the other way, Ryan looked at Shelly one last time. "See ya."
Shelly mouthed 'thank you' to Ryan as he placed his hand around Sami's waist and guided her back to her table.
The meal went painfully slow and was also painstakingly quiet. Even Seth was keeping his trap shut. The lack of interaction at their table made dinner feel like it lasted forever. Ryan just wanted it to be over so he could get back to Sami.
The dessert finally arrived at the table and Ryan inhaled it. Looking at Kirsten with pleading eyes he prayed she would say the magical words he was hoping to hear.
Instead, "You're too late Ryan," Kirsten sighed.
"What?" Ryan snapped.
Kirsten nodded to signal Ryan to turn around. There was Sami. Apparently dinner lasted too long for her too.
The lights in the hall dimmed a bit and music got louder in the background. A slow tempo, forties style song drew couples to the dance floor.
"Come on Ryan, dance with me." Tugging on Ryan's arm, she proceeded to pull him, unwillingly, from his chair.
"Wait! Um. Sami, I…I can't dance."
"I'll teach you. Come on."
Now regretting his quest for a quick escape from the table, Ryan looked to Kirsten for a lending hand.
"Try, Ryan. Let Sami show you."
Pursing his lips, "Right." That was not the answer he wanted to hear.
Ryan let Sami lead him to the dance floor. Keeping his head down, he threw sideways glances at the other people already dancing. They looked so comfortable, so confident. Even other boys his age were dancing as if they'd done this all their lives. This was Newport after all, they probably had.
Digging his heels in, Ryan objected to going too far into the dancing crowd. He preferred to stay closer to the edge. Sami explained briefly to Ryan about where to put his hands and how to hold his arm. Once they had their frame, they started to rock back and forth a bit.
"Don't look at the floor honey, look at me," Sami suggested.
A weak smile lit up Ryan's face as they rocked in a circle.
"Congratulations Ryan Atwood. You're dancing." Sami's eyes glistened when Ryan allowed himself a full smile.
When the song changed to another nostalgic classic, Ryan pulled Sami closer. He was holding his own on the dance floor and didn't want the moment to end just yet.
Two songs later, Sami took his hand and led him out onto the terrace. The evening air was crisp and the moon was casting a washed out glow across the grounds. Taking advantage of their alone time, they embraced and allowed their lips to meet.
The sound of a man clearing his throat interrupted their little rendezvous. Ryan hoped he was doing a good job of hiding his concern when he found Sami's Dad standing nearby.
"Sorry to…infringe…on your privacy, but…it's time to go Sami. I'll meet you in the lobby so you can say goodbye. We'll see you next time Ryan."
Ryan nodded, appreciating the way Sami's Dad dealt with him. It was refreshing. Any girl he'd ever been with, her parents always wanted to kill him.
"Sorry I have to go so soon. Thanks for the dance tonight."
"Thanks for teaching me how to dance," Ryan laughed.
"I'll call you tomorrow. Enjoy the rest of the night."
"Nah. May as well go home now. The best part of the evening is going home."
Ryan brushed her hair away from her cheek before giving her one more solid kiss.
"'Night."
Ryan watched as Sami met up with her parents in the lobby. He meant what he said. The evening may as well be over now. Now it was just a matter or waiting for the Cohens to wrap up conversations with the rest of Newport. There was however, still Seth to deal with.
"Ryan, thank God!" Seth gushed, rushing up to Ryan. "Wait, napkin girl's going home?"
"Yeah," Ryan sighed. "What's up?"
"You gotta help me."
"Now what?"
"I've spent the entire night doing exactly what you told me to. I found girls that looked, you know, nice but not dangerous. I asked them if they wanted a drink, or whatever…"
"Okay. So what's the problem?" Ryan asked, failing to see a problem at all.
"The problem, Ryan, is that I've spent the entire night, and I mean the entire night with the exception of dinner, delivering drinks and making trips to the coat room. I made twenty-three dollars in tips for God's sake! It didn't work Ryan!"
Trying to keep from full out laughing in Seth's face, "Take it easy Seth, this was only one night. You can't give up."
"Give up? Incase you weren't listening Ryan, I never got started!"
"We'll think of something man. We'll find someone for you. Maybe napkin girl knows someone."
"You really think napkin girl would do that for me?"
"Maybe."
Hoisting themselves up on a concrete divider, they sat outside for a moment.
"Check out that star," Seth mentioned, motioning upward at a particularly bright star.
Ryan's head tipped backwards as he took in the spec in the sky that was larger and brighter than everything around it.
"Maybe you should make a wish for some more alone time with napkin girl," Seth razzed.
"And maybe you should wish for some damn good painkillers…you're gonna need them if you keep talking like that."
"Oh stop," Seth whined. "Put down the hair on the back of your neck. There's no need for that. I have to pull your chain every now and then. You've got something I can only dream about. I'm jealous."
Ryan's mouth parted as Seth's words took root in his head. He had something someone else wanted. He was envied. Another first, that had never happened before.
"Don't be jealous. You're no different than me. Just, you're special someone hasn't found you yet. We'll find her. I'll help you find her."
Nodding, "Thanks man." After a beat, "I think I'll go back in and actual order myself a drink at the bar this time…then again, maybe I could pick up a few more bucks if I try talking to some more girls. You coming in?"
Chuckling at Seth's plans, "In a few minutes."
After Seth went inside, Ryan turned his attention to the undeniably bright star in the sky and his Mom crossed his mind. She said she looked at the stars every night. She said she talked to them every night. Even after everything he'd been through, he wondered if she was looking at that same star tonight.
At that moment, Ryan realized where he was. This was the first place in Newport the Cohens ever took him to for an event. He'd only been with them a few days and he was feeling terribly out of place.
Jumping down off the wall, he turned to face the fancy brick façade of the building. It didn't look intimidating now. It was nothing but a bunch of white bricks and windows. Ryan decided to go back inside and he, absently, wandered the corridor until he located a staircase leading down. Descending the stairs, he followed the hallway until it brought him to a back room.
The room was dimly lit and very quite. Apparently they weren't using it tonight. Flipping the switch near the door, the overhead florescent lights hummed to life. Everything was as he remembered it, and he was surprised he remembered it at all. Last time he saw this room he'd drowned himself in quite a bit of alcohol.
"Ryan?"
The voice startled him and he spun around to find Kirsten near the doorway.
"You okay Sweetie?" she asked softly.
"Fine. You scared me."
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. When I saw you coming down here, I was worried…"
"It's okay. I haven't exactly given you a lot of reason to trust me. At least, not when it comes to me being down here."
Kirsten smiled and stepped into the room. She wrapped her arms around herself to fend off the chill in the unused room. "What um, what made you want to come down here?" She hoped his answer would be honest.
"The stars." Off of Kirsten's look, "It's a long story, but the stars make me think of my Mom."
Feeling a ping of worry in her chest, "Do you…miss her?" she inquired, worried what the truth to that question might be.
"No. I don't miss her. I just…she's the one open ended piece of my life. I wish I could finish that part somehow."
Kirsten listened to Ryan intently. He was trying to say something but she wasn't sure exactly what it was yet.
"You remember the last time you found me down here?" Ryan questioned, changing the subject.
"That was a long time ago," she answered. "You were not happy."
Smirking, "No, I wasn't. I think I had every emotion you can think of running through my veins that night. I came down here to get drunk so I wouldn't have to feel any of it."
"I remember that. You were sitting on the crates."
"You were nice to me even back then. You didn't yell at me or kick me out. You just walked me back to the car and took me home." Ryan shoved his hands in his pants pockets and remembered that evening. "I almost screwed up the opportunity to have a great family. All because I was afraid to trust you guys.
"Trust is something that's earned Ryan. You were only living with us for a few days at that point, we couldn't make you trust us that quickly, that wasn't enough time."
Ryan kicked at the floor. "I'm glad I got my head together. It took a while, but I did it. I really do appreciate everything all of you have done for me. You, Seth, even Sandy. I guess I should probably tell him that sometime."
"I know he'd love to hear that," she smiled.
Returning the smile, "I don't know about you, but I think I've spent enough time down here. I don't belong down here," he explained, offering his arm to Kirsten.
Wrapping her arm around Ryan's, "I would love to go back upstairs. They opened the sweet table you know."
"They did? Any chocolate cake up there?"
"Ryan…"
"I'll race you!"
"Do not make me chase you, I have heels on!" she laughed.
Sighing, "Then I guess we'll go together."
"Together."
(TBC)…
A/N – Be prepared…the end is in sight! I know everyone wants this to go on forever, but we're coming full circle. Expect one, possibly two chapters left in this one. : D