My cousin and I came up with this story last night at around 2 AM. Enjoy.
The One and Only! Chapter One (Heero Narrative)
I had no idea what the hell Duo was doing at the time. Moving his hands, up and down. And then there was that white substance. It was everywhere along with a knife and a container. I watched him for 3 minutes then finally decided I wouldn't have him desecrate our kitchen with his unknown actions. I then heard him grunt, and move his hands faster. It was really repulsing the way it spread all…over…Coating every inch and of his hands and that forsaken object in them. That's when I decided to stop this folly. I burst through (valiantly) and grabbed his shoulder. Duo looked shocked, a bit scared and a little ashamed.
"That's empty calories," I said as Duo restlessly giggled and scratched his head.
"Whoops, I thought…it looked so enticing. I couldn't stop myself. Quatre and Trowa do it all the time! They encouraged me to try, them knowing how little I get a day," I was horrified. Quatre and Trowa trying to manipulate my sweet, innocent, healthy Duo.
"Stop that at once! And clean up your mess!" I hung my head in shame and felt disgusted by all the white gel lying about. At least he could have done it neatly and not gotten that crap all over the kitchen.
"Can't you do this in private, Duo? You know how I am, seeing you degrade yourself like that. You know that it's not as fulfilling as Trowa and Quatre portray it as? It all leads in shame,"
"I'm sorry, Hee-chan. I should have listened to you. Now I feel dirty. I may need a shower. You have to help me with my problem, I'm getting addicted," I smirked.
"I went through the same phase. It was all I could think about, but then, I got over it," Duo nodded and put down a container.
"Heero, I'm so glad you're going to help me with this. I felt so…alone…" I started to clean up. I put the container of onion cream cheese in the garbage and wiped up the white filth off the counter. I grabbed the bagel from him and threw it down violently.
"What possessed you? You know this is not healthy? You'll get fat and you know you have gluten intolerancey! What were you thinking?" I rubbed my head in disgrace. How could I catch Duo doing this? Damn Trowa and Quatre with their kinky ways! Not even normal cream cheese! Onion! AHHH! Damn them!
Duo looked forlorned at the bagel, and then looked up at me.
"Thanks, you saved me from temptation. Imagine what I would have done if I actually ate that? Eww," he laughed and I grinned.
"You should take up a more healthy obsession, like masturbation," and then I left him to ponder my statement.
FIN
Ah, so that was a great treat. What were you thinking? You perverts! I know you thought something along those lines, or at least we hope so. Well, have fun and remember…bagels are the original sin. And we are two big sinners.