The Wrong Way

Author: Leta McGotor

This is an attempt to explain why Severus has murdered Albus. In my other story (A Life of Hiding) I have an explanation yet but here you can find another one. Please, tell me what you think about it. This will be a three-shotand I hope you like it.

Chapter 1: Feeling Lost in December

It was late this evening shortly before the Christmas holidays in Hogwarts. It was dark outside, only a few stars were to be seen at the sky and ther moon was often covered by thick clouds. Soon the first snow would fall for it was very cold and you even could see your own breath in the dungeons and outside at the lake. Most students had early gone to bed and only a handful of them were sitting in their common rooms to do their last bit of homework.

It was this time when Severus Snape made his way through the deserted corridors. He was relived that he met no one for a smile played around his lips. He had waited the whole day for the evening, he knew it would be a joyful one. Soom he turned around the last corner and found himself standing in front of one of the heavy old doors of Hogwarts, the door of Minerva McGonagall, with whom he was in love and secretly married for 15 years now.

Severus was sure when he knocked on the door that no one coming across him now would guess the right reasons for his visit at the Deputy Headmistress. He waited impatiently, but it seemed in vain, for the familiar 'Come in'. He knocked again, and again there was no sign of his wife. Severus knew her password but he was sure, that Minerva would become angry if he dared to enter her rooms without knocking.

He spoke the password 'Emerald Lions' and entered the office. Minerva was sitting at her desk, fast asleep. I front of her laid several piles of parchment, two bottles with ink, one of them emty, a lesson plan was to be found on the floor, next to the spoon, belonging to the half emty cup of cold tea.

Severus closed the door quietly behind him and sighed. Half he had expected to find her like this again but a part of him was always in hope, that there would be an evening, when she didn't fall asleep because she was overworked.

Silently he picked her up, like he so often had done it in the last and even more in this term. Minerva snuggeled against his shoulder, still asleep, and let herself carry into her bedroom. Carefully Severus took off her robes, but Minerva awoke nevertheless.

"Severus?" She jawned and sat up, looking to one of her clocks and jawning again.

"It's allright, Mia. You are tired, you should sleep."

"But the essays. I have to correct them until tomorrow." She began to protest but Severus pushed her down on the bed and pulled the blankets around his wife before kissing her on the forehead.

"Let them. Your students will be delighted if you give them back later. The essays don't run away, Mia." He only got a weak mumble as an answer for Minerva had gone to sleep again.

Severus watched her for a few minutes before he left her rooms. Not knowing what to do with himself he left the castle to go for a drink in the Hog's Head. He hoped the cold wind would maybe calm down his temper. He wasn't angry with his wife but with the school and the whole situation. She never seemed to have time for him and he felt let down, lonely. He met her only a few times a day at meals or in the corridors, therefore he was always looking forward to the evenings. But now with all the added work she had to do the evenings and nights were the same as the days. He knew it was not her fault but it was far the easiest way to blame her. Couldn't she do her paper work another time?

Silently and with his famous grumpy expression he entered the pub. To his dismay all tables were occupied and there was no place for him. Then he saw a table at the far end of the pub, occupied by only one person. Slowly Severus aimed for that table and sat down without saying a word. He only nodded to the other man sitting there with a grumpy expression and a half emty glass of golden liquid. The other man did nothing but sipped on his drink.

Severus ordered his first glass of firewhiskey and drowned it down all at once and ordered his second. The man opposite from him looked curiously at Severus, when he drank his third glass, now a bit slowlier than the first ones. Soon they bagan to talk with each other and when the clock showed that it was nearly midnight they both left the pub and went to London to another one. There Severus' disaster began in form of his companions sister, who had a great interest in him.In the early hours of the morning they left the pub together and headed to the small flat she owned.

Several hours later Severus awoke with a burning headache. He found himself in a for him unknown room. He laid spread across a bed, completely naked, his clothes everywhere in the room, beside him an also naked woman. Severus remebered her name as Ester. He swallowed when the memories of the past hours came back to him and he went pale when comprehension dawned on him, that he had indeed cheated on Minerva, he had slept with another woman.

He sat straight upright and he felt cold sweat on his forehead and panic in his stomach. What had he done? Was he really that drunken? As fast as he was able to, he gathered his clothes and took them on. Ester looked sleepily at him, a stray of her hair covering half of her face.

"What are you doing there?", she yawned. Severus ignored her while sizing his shoes

"I have slept with you.", he said matter of factly.

"I know"

"I'm a married man. Do you know that, too?", he asked sarcastically. She frowned shortly before answering.

"No, but where is the problem? We meet secretly, she won't notice anything, I promise you."

"I can't"

"Why not?"

"Because I love her. I have married her because I loved her and I promised to always stand by her side. Understand?" Ester turned sulkily her back to Severus, in her head working on a plan how to keep him. She knew she wanted him, only him no one else. He was the man of her dreams.

"I'll go now.", he said half through the door of her bedroom.

"Wait!", she jumped to her feet and hugged him, kissing him desperately. Severus pushed her softly away before turning around and leaving the flat without saying another word. He only heard Ester screaming behind him.

"Why has you slept with me, when you love her so?"

The rest of the day Severus sat in his office and thought about the incident of last night. He had to tell it Minerva but simultaneous he feared, she would leave him and he would lose her forever. With that contradiction of his thoughts he went to the Great Hall for dinner.

"Severus?… Severus?" Minerva looked worried at her husband. He hadn't said a single word and was paler than normal. "Severus?"

"Hmm? Oh Minerva, have you said something?"

"Are you allright? You look so pale and behave strange, maybe you should go to see Poppy."

"No, I feel fine. Thank you. I'm only a bit tired, that's all." He couldn't do it. He couldn't even look at her, nor he had the courage to tell her that he had sex with another woman.

"Are you sure?"

"Of course, I am."

Minerva looked at him with a stern expression on her face, as if she would look at a student, who had broken the rules. Severus knew that look and it made him even more uncomfortable.

Wearily Severus climbed in his bed this evening, his thoughts with Minerva and to his dismay with Ester, too.

Thoughts, Questions, Reviews?