Chapter Seven: Repeating the Past's voice
A week had past and my time at Hogwarts seemed to go on forever, like some kind of void in a time stream that would never end. It would just keep playing a point in time and never stop. Imagine my relive when the weekend came.
A trip into Hogsmade was in order that weekend, and I needed something to take my mind off a few things, as well as questions.
I wore my muggle clothes instead of the usual robes and other garments. I wore dark blue jeans and a long sleeved pink blouse that made a small 'V' down in my front. It shimmered in whatever light and gave my dark brown hair a bit of an accent as it waved down my back and partly tied up in the back with a mere black clip. I wore a thin blue scarf, as it was a bit cool out on that autumn day, along with a light brown, but not khaki jacket.
Walking down the partly busy streets in a pair of small black high heels, I made my way towards the Three Broomsticks bar and decided to grab a butterbeer. After that I fancied a trip to the little bookshop around the corner and then to Honeydukes. I just adored the blood-flavored lollipops, for some strange reason…
"Well, well. Look what the griffin drag in!" I looked up from where I was sitting at the bar and saw Madame Rosmerta smiling at me.
"Oh! Hello Rosmerta! You're still working here? By now I thought you would have move onto something bigger."
She playfully hit me on the arm, "Oh stop, you know this bar is my life, no matter how troublesome." She winked. "Sasha Moon. I never thought I would see you back here again. Not after you left school and sought out to be a singer! How did that go anyway? Are you dating finer men, or are you breaking hearts like I thought you would?"
I shifted a little uncomfortably, "Oh.." I started, "I'm doing all right. But my chance at fame for my voice is crushed now, totally unreachable. As for the men, a little bit of both really. I'm still just getting over a few things now. Times are changing, you know. Though I'm not sure if they're for the better."
"Yes, I heard. Poor, sweet Dumbledore; just another victim now, no thanks to that traitor, Snape!"
My heart was filled with anger and all hope of wanting to hit her hard across the face, proving her wrong. But she wasn't, he might still be alive, if maybe… But my mind told me otherwise. I kept quiet.
"Yes. It surprised me too." I spoke softly, mainly to myself.
"You want anything dear?" She asked in the same caring tone.
I turned once again and could tell she was going to undercharge me.
"I'll take a butterbeer, thank you."
"One sickle."
"What? Oh no, Rosmerta. Please I insist, let me pay full price, I'm not that special am I?"
"Oh no! I insist, either that or it could be on the house?" She said stepping back to retrieve the drink.
I shook my head slightly. I did not wish to steal money from a friend, yet she was too kind to me, for whatever reason.
"You spoil me too much, Rosmerta. Honestly, I don't know how you are so persistent about me. Some times I wonder,"
"Yes, but you needent worry 'bout me now. Look who's at the door." She placed the drink in front of me as I turned to face another former friend, one whom made me want to scream out randomly for no real reason, but joy.
"Tonks!"
She turned in my direction and saw that it was truly I.
"Sasha!"
Tonks rushed over to me as we both squealed from excitement. We both wound up laughing at each other and at last hugged in our final greeting process.
"Wotcher Sasha! My god! How long has it been? Six- no, seventeen years? It has been too long! Where on earth have you been?"
"Well, one can only try to do her best. Don't you know, I working at Hogwarts now. A teacher!"
"Really!" Both Rosmerta and Tonks asked in unison. I slightly jumped at they're response.
"Yes. I teach 'Defense Against the Dark Arts', don't you know?"
"No, we didn't!" Rosmerta answered.
"So that's why you were on the train, shouting at something. It was so dark I couldn't see a bloody thing! Plus I guess I was a bit panicky, what with the Death Eater involved and everything. Sorry 'bout the outburst. But you know what comes next, don't you?" Tonks asked smiling corky at me now.
I slightly pushed her, "Oh come off it! You know that's just a mental thing. I'm not going to be driven away like the rest! I already know I going to quite later after this year. It's only a one-time thing for me, you know. The position isn't really cursed! And possibly same here from before, back on the train."
"Yeah, tell that to my Remus. He'll find it amusing for a moment. He once had that job himself. Had to quite because someone told of his condition. Three guess' who!"
"What do you mean, Tonks?" I asked bewildered while Rosmerta left us together.
"You should know! Changing for him! See, once he took the job guess who was also working there? Snape! And later on in the year, he let it slip about my Remus. I feel sorry for him sometimes. Thinks he's just too dangerous sometimes. All he needs is the potion and he's fine the rest of the night."
I took a sip of my butterbeer and thought of what she had just said.
"No. No. I mean what you said about 'my Remus'. What was that about? Is he living among the Varg? I would be shocked if he was. Or are you and him…"
She nodded smiling happily, "Yes. And I love it so much. I love him so much mainly. I just wish he could accept me a little more. I know we wishes my safety, but I can't shake it off. I love him."
I frowned for a bit then smiled for her again. I was glad she was happy, but not so glad with whom she was with.
"I'm sure you two will be perfectly happy together, once you've worked out his issues." I stood up from my seat as I felt the growing heart ach that nagged at my stomach too.
"As for me, I uh… Really got to go. Things to do; I just wish you the best, Tonks. Bye!"
I flashed a fake smile at her as I grabbed the butterbeer and left quickly out the door.
"What got into her?" Asked Tonks as Rosmerta came back out again.
She shrugged. "Don't know? Maybe it was a sour butterbeer."
"Ughh!" They both replied together.
My heels clicked the brick stone ground as my mind raced around asking myself why I had fallen for him during school? Adding to the fact it was Tonks who he now possibly loved made it even worse. I couldn't allow it. I shouldn't allow it. My heart ached as I yearned for Remus' heart again. Yet a part of me was starting to like, maybe even... Snape. His name rang through my mind and heart as well for a second.
But I wouldn't allow it either. He was like a brother at times, and sometimes a friend. Yet during the last year at school he was, well.. Dare I say it? Yes, a lover. But he had his heart set out on that lovely witch, Lily Evens. Of coarse, that was then. This was now and what was happening to everyone involved in it.
'She who must aid him willingly,' Indeed. Lord and Merlin both knew I did not want to do this. Not on my life. But it was my life, my life or possibly his.
I sat down on the steps of Honeydukes and cuffed my hands over my eyes. It was hopeless.
"Why must it be this way?" I asked myself, hoping someone would hear me and answer.
I waited for nothing. I knew I had no other choice. And now with the information Jasper gave me, it all started to unfold to me.
"But why?" I asked again. "Why must it be so? Why should I even be apart of this family of ravens, when I am, in my heart a she-wolf. I am putnar, damn it! Not a scavenger! A hunter. They may be smart and dark, but it is he who has a raven for a spirit. A Patronus." I stopped and heard something behind me. I turned to find nothing. Nothing. Is that all that will ever be in my life? That and tears? No. There was once something else; love. It was nice to love, to be loved and to know that love was there... But now there was nothing and tears...
"Professor Moon?"
I turned once again to find Potter standing there behind me… He still looked too much like his father.
"Ah, Potter. How uh... Nice to see you. Is anything wrong?"
"That's really what I wanted to ask you, Professor. I heard you crying, we did, really."
He motioned behind him as I could see Ron and Hermione looking and watching me from beyond.
"Ah. You did, did you? Yes, I uh... Was indeed getting a little tear jerky, but uh, I'm just now getting over it." I flashed a small weak smile at them all.
"Is there something you need, Professor?" Asked the brilliant witch.
"Nothing that you can give, child. Nothing you can give me now. I was just thinking of my past, and family. Nothing more, except a friend."
I stood up and stepped forward towards them, seeing as I was going in there later anyways. My face seemed dry now.
"Your not going to tie up my tongue again, are you?" Asked the red headed male. I bleakly laughed at him and shook my head. "No, Weasley. Not today." I pulled out my wand and pointed it at him.
"But, if you dare try to say one more remark about... Well, you know of whom I speak. I will not only tie up your tongue, but I might as well blow it up. And let's see how well you'll talk later on."
I turned inside, bought what I came for and strolled off back to the castle, hoping no one had seen me threaten the boy. Though I didn't care, even if it was about Snape.
"I still don't see why you must try it! I'm not even sure if the fireplace is charmed." I added quickly, trying to talk him out of it.
Snape was really going to try and place himself in my room with Floo powder. Trouble was I didn't want him to get hurt or die or anything of that nature.
"Sasha, if we don't try it, how partial do you think we'll be able to search for them all."
"I don't know! Maybe if you feed me information I can go and fetch them myself. I may not want to, but I'm stuck it this now and I can't get out! And all because of this stupid prophecy. I hate it, you know. It ruined my career and my life, as well as yours. And you know it."
"Don't talk like that, Sasha. You know I hate it as much as you do, but it was foreseen that way, and now nothing can come between it and us. That's why it called-"
"Destiny. I know that, Severus. I just wish it had meant another generation and not ours. I can't help but wish he was wrong about before."
"Yes, but he wasn't. And you know that. Now stand clear about the fireplace or I might ram into you."
I rolled my eyes and wished he would just stop. "Fine, it's your life, not mine. And I should respect your wishes. No matter how stupid they are."
His eyes narrowed at me, "When I get there, should I kill you or destroy something you love to still have?" He asked.
"Depends. Are you willing to kill your friend, or yourself? Just get on with it, already. Its getting time for dinner and I don't want to be late."
"Fine, I'm going to cut off for a minute. So hold on."
His head was no longer visible in the fire as he tried to bring himself into body and blood. I stood at the edge of my bed and waited. It was about a good five minutes that he finally came about through the ashes and flames that burned the remaining logs. Dust and ash flew into the room and cover little of the stone floor.
Severus was a bit shaken up but he managed to stand on his own two feet after all.
"Funny," I started with my arms crossed, "I thought you would be crawling on your belly, like the snake you are." Snape just sneered at my remark.
"Right, just as I thought you would be down on your paws, like the bitch you are. Oh I'm sorry. A she-wolf, like it matters. Its pretty much the same thing."
He strutted over to the other side of room in his dark, black robes. He never seemed to wear anything normal, did he?
"There, are you satisfied? It works, we know this now. Now you should go, before someone comes to fetch for me." He walked towards me and tried to calm me down, or what I believed he tried.
"No one is coming for you. Not for dinner, anyways. I've noticed that you've been a little tense since I called you. Is everything alright? Did someone hurt you? Who hurt you?"
I slightly pushed him away from me and spoke in a strong yet weary voice. "Everything's fine, I'm fine. No one hurt me. I'm just... I don't know. A guess a little upset over... Something. But you of all people would hate to hear what its about."
He tried again towards me. "There is nothing I can do that might make you feel worse than what you might be feeling. So you might as well talk to me, I have nothing but free time for now... What is it?"
I turned around away from him and started to fight back the erg to hit him for whatever reason. I just wanted to be alone for a mere moment or so. Was it too much to ask? Was I being accused for a crime I had nothing to do with?
No. I was being controlled by what seemed to be words that some witch or wizard had spoken and guessed of what its purpose was. I was being controlled by a path of events that would supposedly happen to my friend, my favorite teacher and me. Not to mention the darkness that lay ahead of me. Apart of me was scared, while the other part of me was brave and not wanting to have to wait for either his or my demise.
"Nothing, it's nothing. I'm just a little moody, you know." I paused to focus my mind on the other thing besides Remus and Tonks. I knew he would find out about that later, just not now. "Do you remember it? Word for word?" I asked.
He knew what I was referring to. He sighed softly and waited for a minute. "Yes, almost completely. Though if I make a mistake in telling you then you realize that we could think mistake the prophecy for a different ending?"
"Yes, I do."
He turned to take a seat on my loveseat and rested his head on his right hand. I trailed behind him and sat down next to him, facing him, waiting; so that I may hear my- no, our future once again. He closed his eyes and curled his lips, trying to remember, like he used to when we were younger. I licked my lips and breathed in deeply. He started to recite it, once again:
"I think it was this: 'The snake from the pit will come for the raven and hope her demise will bring forth a dark haven. One of which he shall rule till his heir can take care. While another serpent shall see his despair.
But who is the fiend, the one that shall kill? For the phoenix will fall and leave them to deal. The raven shall cry, yet her tears heal no wound. And the blood of the wolf will tamper soon.
Pure and mixed blood will be one and will find the heart a hard one to shun. Will the child be born of darkness or light? Only the raven will choose the mate, and hope that she has done right.' I'm pretty sure that's what he said. But my memory is still a little hazy, I think I missed a part."
"You didn't. Or so I think. Though I can't be certain, it was many years ago since we last heard it being told properly. No one could remember such things like Deumbledore could..."
I thought about what he had restated, along with my part, while it played in my head again. Over and over it seemed to never end. 'Why must this be so? Did he not want to kill me before? Was Jasper lying to me? Surely I am not the one who has the child... Unless they mean Potter.'
I broke the silence and my thoughts, "Severus? You don't think that Potter is the child, do you? I mean, he was born of light and love, right?"
He turned his head in my direction. "I'm not sure. This still doesn't make sense about what it's saying. Part of what I hate about prophecies, they never seem to tell it strait."
He stood and began to pace around, turning his back towards me.
"Its about half way through dinner, you should go. I'll be here once you get back. If not then I have left for your protection. Just keep in mind what it means, try not to talk to the wrong people. And for Merlin's sake don't try to threaten Potter again. We can't afford to lose the information."
I started to walk around him to get to the door as I snorted. "I still don't see why the Dark Lord can't tell me where the bloody hell his bits of souls are! That way I can get to them before Potter does. Its not as if he's going to suspect me anyway. Potter couldn't figure out how to find a spy, not that I'm saying I like being one, if he or she was right there in front of him. And believe me, you were there the whole time, Severus."
He paused and stared at me. "True," He said at last "but remember that I was there in front of you and him the whole time as well. Yet you didn't know I would turn on you both."
I turned before closing the door, "Yes, but you did forget that even before I came out of hiding you didn't speak a word of my whereabouts to your beloved master. Why is that; I think I'll ponder."
I turned around, slammed the door behind me and took off to the great hall for my meal.
"Are you sure? You seem so disturbed. You can't be feeling fine. Besides I know you, Sasha. You've been my student once, remember?"
"Yes, but I think I had enough remembering of the past for one night, Slughorn. But thank you for your concern."
I took another big piece of my lamb and shoved it into my mouth before placing the goblet to my lips. Dinner was not as quiet as I would have wanted it to be.
"Sasha, I was wondering if you might have any thoughts about, well.. Never mind."
"Look, Slughorn, I would really like it if I could eat in peace right now. I have too much on my mind. I just need to eat and get some rest. Hopefully I'll feel better in the morning."
He looked back at his plate and picked at his duck. "Fine. I'm sorry. I was just worried about you. You just seem too much like.."
"Like what?" I asked slightly slamming my utensils on the table. It seemed to startle him a bit.
"Well, actually it's a who."
"O.K. then, who am I acting a 'too much' like?"
His stayed silent for a minute, then spoke, "Well, like.. Like Snape! Alright, like Snape!"
I hit him slightly on the arm, signaling him to shut up. Some of the students stopped what they were doing to look up at us, even the three students that I had to look out for.
I tried to silence him, "Alright look," I whispered. "I don't ever want to be compared to the greasy bastard ever again. Got it? Because there is no way in hell that I am like that filthy, backstabbing snake! And why you feel as if we seem alike is beyond me, but I don't ever want to hear that phrase again. Do you understand me, Slughorn?"
"What the bloody hell has gotten into you, Sasha. First you're disturbed and irritated and now you're threatening me like you don't even know me. I just want to help you out of any problem your having now. Is that too much?"
I stood up without even touching my plate or drink. "How can you help me out, Slughorn, if your just creating the problem to be even more hard as it is already? Good-night!"
I stormed off, agitated, non-the less. Rushing off to my room like.. 'Oh god and Merlin! I am like SNAPE! Shit!' I thought. 'No. I'm just tiered. I should get some rest and hope that Snape has left my room.'
As I climbed the steps to my domains, I could not help but think why I was involved in this. Though the answer was clear, I still questioned it.
Why was I to be the last one living, besides him? It made no sense at all, even with help given to me by Dumbledore years ago.
I just could not place it all together. It was far too big of a puzzle for me. I also feared that I might only know what it all meant until it would be too late. For something would happen, I just knew it; it was in my bones and deep within my mind and heart.
I pushed opened the door with one hand, while rubbing my eyes together with the other. Not even glancing around to see if he was here I plopped my whole body onto the bed, closing my eyes and waited for either death, sleep, or Snape to through a remark.
Nothing but silence entered my ears. For once I was glad about nothing; nothing and silence.
'Just a few more months, Sasha.' I told myself. 'Then you can go back to your old home and seek refuge. There you can wait for your peace. May I find death, before I find love.'
End of Chapter Seven
Hello!
People of this page.. and those who are here by accident, I have come to tell you that you should ingnore some of the lines here in this story, because something is fickal about my laptop. I don't know what, but bare with me here people.
Alsoo I would love it if anybody, thats anybody, would like to reveiw, to tell me how they like it so far. To tell me what I may be doing wrong. And just to say hi or whatever.
Including this: Harry Potter& many other charecters don't belong to me except Sasha. Please note that I have made these letters bigger on accident and am now seeing use in them.
To let you guys see that I really want people stating what they want! Haza!...
O.K. I think I'm done. So don't come back until I have posted another chapter, Alright?... Well? What are you still doing here for? Do you want me to insult you in french or something? Because I don't know how!
Go on, be free. Free from this screen of light and color, for it is too late for me! ... Ewww! The colors...
(In a trance right now, next chapter coming soon. And it will leave people talking. I hope.)