Title: Runaways
Author: irmak
Pairing/Character:
Logan/Veronica
Rating: PG-13
Length:
1602
Spoilers: Season 1, just to be sure.
Summary:
AU. Almost pre-season 1. Duncan dumps Veronica and Logan finds out
the truth about Lilly. Ah, the young love!"Let's
go."
"Where?"
"I dunno. But 'away' sounds fine."
"God, Logan! It's always that easy with you, right? I can't... I, I... My dad and... I have-"
"Jesus, Veronica, why does it always have to be this complex with you? I didn't ask you to spend the rest of your life away from here. And you know what? Forget-"
"Fine. Let's go."
"You sure?"
"Yeah..."
"Off we go, then."
---
I never said anything, but my intentions are to keep this road trip as long as possible. It's not like I'm kidnapping her or something, God forbid, she'd bore me to death. It's just... I really don't exactly have a home to return to. The truth will set you free, my ass. I mean, I'm totally aware what my little stunt will cause. A nice little trip to Dad's closet, then choosing the perfect belt. You know, the crocodile one is my favorite. You'd be amazed how different it feels on you. The pun is very much intended. After that I'll be released from my redemption, only to find mom drinking. But, hell, I really don't think she'd even be around this time. Is she gonna leave me with him? Fuck. If I can postpone this mess for one more day, wouldn't that be my lucky day?
---
"Hey, what's the good of a road trip if you don't speak?"
"I didn't know we were here to bond."
"Wait. Does that mean we're not exchanging friendship bracelets?"
"Logan-"
"Whatever. So... Did you know? I mean... Lilly..."
"No."
"In that case, you guys didn't exchanged any bracelets, either, I suppose."
"Yeah, I suppose not."
---
It's so funny how your life can change in a couple of weeks. First Duncan breaks up with me, and then Logan finds out about Lilly and... he. You know, Lilly and I did have a good laugh about her lovers, but I've never thought she was really serious. I thought... I don't know what I've thought. God! How could she do this to Logan? Yeah, he can be a jackass and he has so many issues and all, but he is... Logan! I know- fuck, she knows he loves her. And yet she can go and sleep with his father? That's just cruel. Ah, the beautiful Kane family, and how they like to ruin lives. Runs in the family, I guess.
---
"We have to stop somewhere, you know. I need to go to the bathroom."
"Geez, Ronnie! Can't you stop whining, like, for two minutes?"
"You just said I didn't speak enough and now I'm whining? Make up your fucking mind, Logan!"
"Did you just say 'fucking' or is it my dirty, dirty mind talking?"
"Stop, you'll make me blush."
---
She's always been cool, you know. I'll irritate the fuck out of her, and yet she'll still be here. I really want to say something nice to her, like, 'This means a lot to me' or 'I'll never forget this, Ronnie'. Fuck, even a 'thank you' will work. The funny thing is, I don't have to. She understands. I haven't got a clue about how she does it, or how the hell I know that, but it's... there. We fucking communicate. With Lilly, it had to be words or big actions, you know? I had to tell her how much I loved her, or had to fuck her brains out, only then she'd be convinced. Now, it's all in the air. I really don't wanna fuck this up, but... I just don't know what to do. Nobody ever got me before. And, of all people, Veronica Mars does.
---
"Maybe we should stay in a hotel or something, V."
"You say this now? We're in the middle of nowhere, Logan. We haven't seen a motel for miles. And now we're both too tired to drive."
"Yeah, like I'd let you drive my car."
"You call this a car? Mine is a car. Your mom's car is a car. This is a monster in bright yellow disguise. By the way, is yellow the new pink?"
"I'm sorry, in what universe are you living? If Le Baron is a car, tell me where can I get it from, junkyard sales?"
"You wish. You're just jealous."
"Yeah, that's why I'm holding on to this can. I'll huff and puff and it'll turn into a Le Baron, if I'm lucky."
---
Has hell frozen over? I've never... There's this side of Logan I've never seen. I know he's hurt, I can see it in his eyes. If you don't mind the cliché, he lets me see. Boy, I've looked in there before, and I've seen so many things. But being hurt was never among those. Now, it's so different that I feel uneasy. I don't know how to handle this Logan. I almost forgot about my pain, I'm that focused on his. It's crazy. He doesn't even piss me off anymore. I mean, he's always been... good with words, to say the least. Now I see what's behind those words. I love our banter... Wait. When the hell it turned to be our banter? Fuck. I mean, I still like the back and forth snark, but now I can see he's better than this. You know what I wanna do? I wanna hug him. Now, that's embarrassing. I wanna hug, of all people, Logan Echolls.
---
"You cold?"
"No, this blanket is fine... Logan?"
"Yeah?"
"How do you feel?"
"You mean when I found out-"
"No. I... I mean... now."
"Would you hurt me if I say... I'm OK?"
"Why would I hurt you?"
"Because... I wouldn't feel this way if you weren't here?"
---
I really don't know how I decided to hold her hand. I just... needed it. But it's not because she's there, you know, it's because she's her. She was warm and so familiar. I thought she would start screaming, asking me what the hell my problem was. Instead, she clasped her fingers around mine. I don't know for how long we sat like this, although it felt like a second to me, and then her grip loosened. I was disappointed, and this feeling surprised me. I mean, Veronica Mars? She lets go off my hand and I feel sorry? It's... fucking unexplainable. So, you know what I did? I sighed. Fuck. I shouldn't have. Thank God, she didn't say anything, she just reached out and touched my face. Then she said I was beautiful. That's what broke me. I just couldn't hold back that tear, and it felt right on her hand. You know, Lilly once witnessed me crying, and she made fun of me for being so weak. I know Veronica wouldn't ever do that. And now all I want to do is kiss her. I've never felt such an urge before. I just have to.
---
"Logan?"
"Hmm?"
"I just wanted you to know... This is not... It's not about Duncan."
"I know."
---
He doesn't have to say anything. I know it's not about Lilly, either. When he kisses me, the world disappears. I've never thought I'd feel this way with just a kiss. His lips are so soft, and it's totally on the contrary of what I've been thinking. I had seen him with Lilly and he seemed… rough. But now, I'm the eager one. I can't get enough of him. He's taking it slow, as if he's afraid of breaking me. When I kiss him even faster, he just accommodates. I open my mouth a little to welcome his tongue, which tastes like... I swear to God, he tastes like candy. I could go on like this forever, but way to soon he breaks the kiss. I feel disappointed until his hand finds mine again, and we lay like this for I don't know how long. I can hear his breathing getting heavier, as he slowly doses off to sleep. Now, this may sound crazy, I mean, I kissed Logan Echolls in his car and I have no idea where the hell we are, but at this very moment, it feels like home. Tears fill my eyes. I know it's not about Lilly, but how can I be sure that it's about me? What if when we return tomorrow, he goes back to being Logan? I can't go back now. It's too late. It's that kiss, it changed everything.
---
"Rise and shine!"
"What? Oh, my God, is it morning already!"
"Yeah, and V... Well, we're back."
"WHAT?"
"Yeah... I decided... I can't run forever, V. I have to face them."
"I know. Not that... It's just-"
"Veronica? Just listen to me."
---
I told her that I needed her help to get through all this, that last night had changed everything. And when I offered her my hand, she took it. I kissed her beautiful face again, just before we entered my house. This house may be where I live, but it will never be my home. With Veronica, I've finally found my home.
---