The Almost Wedding of Integra Hellsing
Integra was in her office when she received a phone call.
"Hello." she answered.
"GOD DAMN YOU INTEGRA HELLSING! WHERE IS MY SON!" roared the male voice on the other end.
"Good morning to you too, Sir Wellington." she groaned. "To what do I owe the honor of this call?"
"Don't toy with me! Where is my son! I know he has gone your house, again. I had him followed and they tell me that he hasn't come out. That was three days ago. What have you done with him? Has your pet monster killed him!" expounded Sir Wellington.
"Sir Wellington if James were dead. Alucard would have impaled him in your front yard. You needed worry, he's alive. I will send him home today." assured Integra.
"I want to speak with him. NOW!" he demanded.
"Hold please." cooed Integra, as she placed him on hold.
Integra waited a good 15 minuets before she called for Mouse. After all, who did he think he was ordering her around like that? He could sit and stew for all she cared.
"Mouse." called Integra.
Mouse appeared instantly.
"Do you need something, sir?" she asked.
"Where is James?" asked Integra.
Mouse smiled.
"He's in my room; sleeping."
Integra only raised an eyebrow. She knew Mouse and James had been "consorting". She wasn't angry though. One, she had Alucard and two, she practically given him to Mouse the night he arrived.
"Wake him. His father misses him and wants to talk to him." informed Integra.
"Yes, sir." said Mouse.
Two minuets later, Mouse appeared with a half dressed Englishman in her arms. Mouse let go of him and James walked towards Integra's desk.
"You sent for me, sir?" he asked.
"You're out of uniform, soldier." Integra grinned.
"Yes, sir. Not sorry though, sir." he said, smiling and casting a glance at Mouse.
"James, your father wishes to speak to you." said Integra, handing him the phone.
"Why?" asked James. "He's never wanted to before."
Integra just sat back in her chair and waited.
"Hello." said James.
"James! Thank God. I thought you were dead." said Sir Wellington.
"No. I'm fine." answered James.
"What's going on over there? Why haven't you come home?" asked Sir Wellington.
"Nothing. Integra and I have just been getting acquainted is all." explained James.
"Getting acquainted should be done in public where that blasted monster of hers can't kill you." stated Sir Wellington.
"Really father, some things shouldn't be done in public." said James.
"What are you talking about? Don't tell me you and Integra are…are…" began Sir Wellington.
"I'll be home later today. Nice to know you care about me after all." said James, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
James hung up on his father before he could ask anything else.
"Well, I guess I have to go now." said James to Integra.
"You are welcome here anytime, James. I extend to you an open invitation." said Integra.
"Thanks. Are you sure he'll be alright with that?" asked James.
"As long as you keep your hands off me, he'll let you live." warned Integra. "Mouse."
"Yes, sir."
"Show James to the door." ordered Integra.
"Yes, sir." smiled Mouse.
"Oh, Sir Hellsing." called James. "Be careful of my father. I know he wants Hellsing, no matter what face he gives at court. I also know that he will stop at nothing to get what he wants. So be careful."
"How did you grow up to be such a decent man, with his blood in your veins?" asked Integra.
"I take after my mother." said James.
Then he turned and followed Mouse out.
Sir Wellington was waiting for his son, when he came home. James could tell by his bearing that he was not happy.
"James." addressed his father, roughly.
"Father." replied James just as coldly.
James walked past his father and into the room. He headed straight for the kitchen.
"James!" called Sir Wellington.
"Yes, sir." answered James as he raided the fridge.
"Where have you been?" he demanded.
"At Sir Hellsing's Manor." said James, nonchalantly.
"For the past three days!"
"Yes."
"What were you doing for three days!"
"Talking."
"Talking? For three days!"
"We had a lot to talk about." said James, ignoring his father, and sitting down to eat the roast beef leftovers.
"You've been over there a lot these past months."
"Well, I am her fiancé. I have an open invitation to visit whenever I want."
"Was Alucard there?" asked his father, in an off the cuff manner.
"I don't know." said James, between bites. "I didn't see him the whole time I was there."
James wasn't lying to his father. He was sure Alucard was in the house somewhere, but as that he never left Mouse's room, he didn't know. James smiled inwardly as he thought about Mouse. She was some girl. Some vampire girl. She feeds, we shag. I could get to like this. Alucard gets Integra, I get Mouse, and the public gets Integra and me as a couple. It was the perfect setup, everybody wins. Suddenly, Sir Wellington's voice derailed his pleasant train of thought.
"Where is he?" asked his father.
James snapped out of his thoughts and looked at his father.
"Where is who?"
"Alucard!"
"I don't know." said James, defensively.
His father started pacing the floor and thinking to himself. James watched his father, with little interest, as he paced the floor.
"After his display at Buckingham Palace, maybe she confined him again." reasoned Sir Wellington, aloud. "This is good, if she confined him, he can not stop us."
"Us?" questioned James.
Sir Wellington looked at his son as if seeing him for the first time. James shook his head. As always once his father started scheming, he completely forgot about him.
"What ever you are planning, don't do it. Just leave her alone." warned James.
Sir Wellington said nothing to his son. He just walked quickly out of the room. James pulled out his cell phone and called Integra.
"Hello, Integra? My father's up to something. So be careful. O.K."
"Alucard's back in confinement." announced Sir Wellington.
"Are you sure?" asked Sir Wright.
"How do you know?" inquired Sir Island.
"My son just spent two days with Integra and Alucard didn't show up once." informed Sir Wellington.
"Confinement, huh. Too bad she didn't kill him." said Sir Kent.
"Oh come now. Alucard's her most powerful weapon and she knows it. With him, she's completely unprotected. But with him in confinement, she's venerable; now's the time to strike. The wedding will take place and it will take place now." reported Sir Island.
"So how do you propose to get her to the church on time?" asked Sir Milton.
"Yes, she never leaves the manor. And we can hardly send her an invitation to her own wedding." complained Sir Jeffery.
"Bond." smiled Sir Wellington.
"Bond?" questioned Sir Wright.
"Yes, Bond. They are a female quartet that combines rock rhythms with classical music."
"Oh, yes. I've heard of them. Those ladies are quite talented." said Sir Milton.
"If they play a concert at Royal Albert Music Hall, I have no doubt that Integra will attend. All we'd have to do is go and get her." conveyed Sir Wellington.
"This could work. This could actually work." grinned Sir Kent.
"Or we could all get killed. What's to keep Alucard from killing all of us once Integra's married?" prompted Sir Jeffery.
"Once Integra's married; she won't be able to release him. The blood bond will be broken. She'll have no choice but to leave him confined, because she won't be able to control him anymore. Either way, we still win. My son will rule Hellsing and there will be no Alucard."
"BULLY!" the knights cried in elation.
"Sir Morse."
"Yes, Sir Wellington."
"Please inform her majesty that the wedding of James and Integra will take place as planned."
"Yes, sir."
"Sir Island, please arrange for Bond to perform at Royal Albert Hall."
"Yes, of course."
"Sir Kent, you'll be in charge of "escorting" Sir Integra to her wedding. I trust that you will have no trouble in retrieving her from the concert."
"None at all. I'll send my best men."
"What of your son, Sir Wellington? It's no secret that he doesn't like you. Will he go along with this?"
"Don't worry about James. Just leave him to me." smiled Sir Wellington.
Integra was reading the morning paper, when she came across the announcement for Bond's concert. She looked at the clock it was 9:58 am. The concert was at noon.
"Mouse!"
Mouse instantly appeared.
"Yes, master."
"How would you like to attend a concert? I know how much you love music. This should be right up your alley." invited Integra, as she showed Mouse the advertisement.
"Cool. I know them. They're good, not as good as me, but they're good." smiled Mouse.
"The music of your mother and the modesty of your father." teased Integra.
Mouse read the entire article.
"Today? That's short notice." said Mouse.
Then she looked at Integra's face. She was honestly happy. Her blue eyes sparkled in a way that they had not lately. So much was happening now. The demons were getting bolder. The number of attacks had increased. Integra stayed up all hours of the night now and slept mostly during the day. Alucard didn't like it, but he couldn't stop her. Integra always needed to be in command. Maybe this concert was a fortuitous rest for Integra.
"O.K. Let's go." consented Mouse.
Mouse brought the car around as Integra changed clothes. It had been a long standing rite, that the Hellsings had a private box at the Hall. So getting tickets wasn't a problem. Heads turned as Integra walled the halls to her seat.
"What are they staring at?" asked Integra, mentally.
"Well, they could be staring at me. Your female bodyguard dressed to kill or they are staring at you the elusive Integra Hellsing; always heard of, and yet never seen. Or they could be wondering, are you getting fat or have you been up to something naughty."
suggested Mouse, mentally.
"Well, if they are staring at me, let them. My personal life is none of their business. As for you, I told you not to bring that sword. You look like one of King Arthur's knights in a British Army uniform."
"Maybe, but anyone foolish enough to attack you will find out that this sword is not the only weapon that I'm carrying."
Suddenly, a high pitched female voice broke into their mental conversation.
"Lady Integra Hellsing, how good to see you."
Integra stopped and turned. The voice was coming form Sir Kent's wife. God, she could talk the devil to death.
"Hello, Lady Kent." said Integra, formally.
"My, my so formal. You may call me Elizabeth." she gushed.
"And you may call me Sir Hellsing." answered Integra.
Lady Kent gave a weak smile to hide her anger at being addressed so. After all, she was only trying to be friendly. If this was the way she acted all the time, no wonder her husband hated her.
"Isn't it simply wonderful that Bond is putting on this special performance." bubbled Lady Kent.
"Special performance?" questioned Integra.
"Yes, word is her majesty commissioned they to play today. It was very short notice. So she must be extremely busy." explained Lady Kent.
Integra's senses were telling her that this smelled like a trap. But then Why? Of course, here she was out in the open.
"Is she your bodyguard?" asked Lady Kent, looking at Mouse.
"Yes." said Integra.
"Isn't she a bit young?"
"I assure you her experience as a capable solider is twice that of her age." said Integra.
"And how old is she?" pressed Lady Kent.
"Nineteen." lied Integra, mindful of England's soldiering age limits.
"Sir Hellsing." called Mouse.
"Yes, Kalle." responded Integra.
They had agreed to keep Mouse's identity a secret. Being escorted around by a vampire that was not Alucard was giving away too much information. So as always, Integra used Mouse's real name.
"The concert is due to being in three minuets. We should find your seat." reminded Mouse.
"Yes, of course. Do excuse me Lady Kent." said Integra.
"Of course, …Sir Hellsing." spoke Lady Kent, using Integra's formal title. "I do hope you enjoy the concert."
Integra and Mouse left. Lady Kent waited until they were out of sight and then she called her husband.
"Hello, David. She's here. They have just gone to her box. Yes, they. She has a bodyguard. No, just one. She's a young girl, nineteen years old. She shouldn't be a problem for your men. She is carrying a sword though. Yes, her name is Kalle."
Lady Kent hung up and smiled. She didn't know what her husband had planed for Lady Hellsing, but she hoped that it would hurt, a lot.
Mouse stood watch as Integra enjoyed the concert. Integra smiled as she sat listening. She looked down at her stomach. The children hadn't kicked once, so far.
"So, you're both music lovers." thought Integra.
"Master." called Mouse.
"Yes, Mouse." replied Integra.
"They are coming for you." said Mouse.
"Who."
"Sir Kent's men."
"What do they want?"
Mouse cocked an ear. She could read their thoughts as easily as it was to listen to music.
"To take you to Buckingham Palace."
"Why?"
"They don't know. They've only been instructed to see you safely there, and at all cost." explained Mouse.
"Damn the knights. If her majesty wanted me, she would have sent for me. I wonder what those jackals are up to this time?" growled Integra.
"How much of a fight do you want me to put up?" asked Mouse.
"You're a highly trained HUMAN bodyguard." said Integra. "But feel free to use your vivid imagination."
"Body count?" asked Mouse, with an evil grin.
"Zero." said Integra, still trying to enjoy some of the concert.
"Aww." snickered Mouse. "Broken limbs?"
Integra turned and looked at Mouse.
"As I said, use your imagination."
"Yes, sir." smiled Mouse.
All of a sudden, Integra heard a man's voice.
"Sir Hellsing." he addressed her.
Integra turned and faced him. She crossed her arms and waited.
"Yes."
"You are to come with us please." he instructed.
"And you are?" inquired Integra, unimpressed with their manner.
Integra had been around dangerous men all her life. These men gave no air of danger. They were most likely MI5 agents sent to retrieve her, quickly and quietly. They didn't know of her daytime guardian, so they didn't send their heavies.
"We are your escorts." he replied.
"Escorts? No. I do not wish to be escorted at this time. The concert hasn't even ended yet." said Integra, dismissing them completely and returning to the concert.
"Nevertheless, you will go." insisted the little one, walking towards Integra.
Mouse stepped out of the shadows and confronted him. He stopped and looked at her.
"Where did not come from?" he asked.
"A true warrior can conceal his presence from his enemies. I could have killed you as soon as you stepped into the room." said Mouse, with an air of superiority.
"Like a kid like you could beat me." he said with confidence and contempt.
"Beatcha like a red-headed stepchild." sneered Mouse.
"Stop yakking, kick her ass, and let's go. We're on a tight schedule." urged the skinny one.
The little one lunged forward at Mouse. Mouse just side stepped him and punched him in the stomach. He fell to his knees and gasped for air.
"Solar plexus punch, hurts like hell." laughed Mouse. "So does this."
Mouse punched him with a hard right to the jaw and the little one dropped to the floor outcold.
"Next." smiled Mouse, at the remaining three enemies.
"Get her." ordered the man with a handlebar mustache.
Two more agents tried to jump Mouse. This time Mouse let them grab her. One grabbed her from behind and the other started punching her in the stomach. Mouse just smiled.
"Males. Always beating up the little guy." teased Mouse.
She then head butted the one behind her and kicked the other one in the nuts. She turned and karate kicked the chubby one into the wall. The other one, still holding his nuts, she doubled punched. He dropped like a sack of shit on a fertilizer truck. The mustache man just sighed and pulled out a gun.
"I have no time for this." he complained.
"Feel free to leave at any time." laughed Mouse.
"I don't think so." he said. "Not without Sir Hellsing."
With that, Mustache Man shot Mouse.
TTHHPP. TTHHPP.
Mouse's body jerked reflexively as something hit her. She looked down at her torso. Blood started pooling.
"Damn. That's cheating." said Mouse, frowning.
She dropped to her knees and gasped for breath. Mustache Man started walking towards Integra. Mouse sucked air in short breaths and raised her arm to bar his path.
"I won't let you take her." she said.
"And you can't stop me." he said.
TTHHPP.
Mouse's body fell. Blood drained from the hole in Mouse's head onto the floor. Integra sat watching. She stared at Mouse's body and then glared at Mustache Man.
"You didn't have to shoot her." she said, coldly. "She was my best soldier."
"And a worthy opponent. But now we are late, so if you don't mind." he said waving his gun at Integra and motioning for her to move.
Mustache Man escorted Integra from her box and left the concert hall.
After they were gone, Mouse sat up. She looked around at the three men still unconscious on the floor.
"Guess you guys will have to find your own way home." chuckled Mouse.
Mouse sighed as she pulled the two bullets from her stomach. Then she summoned Alucard.
"Alucard, they've taken her." reported Mouse.
"What!"
"Calm down. They're taking her to Buckingham Palace. The knights will most likely try to marry her off while you are sleeping. For some reason, humans believe that Vampires are ONLY nocturnal creatures." explained Mouse.
"Well, they are about to learn otherwise." vowed Alucard.
"Wear something appropriate for a wedding." urged Mouse, removing the last bullet from her brain.
It was now 2pm. Integra had successfully convinced them to let her dress herself. But they had posted guards to keep her from escaping. Now she was being lead down the isle to her waiting husband. She felt completely …annoyed. This was not at all how she had envisioned her wedding day. Come to think of it, she never really thought about it, her marriage. She just assumed it would be simple; her, the groom, a priest, and Walter giving her away as father of the bride. This, this was half the kingdom, a man she didn't know, and so asshole of a knight pretending to be her "substitute" father.
"Integra Hellsing, you've just been married. What's the first thing you're going to do?" asked the announcer.
"I'm going to kill all the Knights of the Royal Order." growled Integra.
Integra snapped out of her little daydream when she heard a familiar voice.
"Hello, Integra. I told you my father was up to something." whispered James.
"What's going on?" asked Integra, taking her place beside him.
James held up his hands for Integra to see. Integra raised in eyebrow in curiosity when she saw the handcuffs on his wrists.
"Shotgun Wedding." said James. "I'm sorry about this."
"Nothing to be sorry for." said Integra. "You are not responsible for your father's actions. And, at least you did try to warn me."
Their whispering to each other stopped when the priest spoke.
"Friends we are gathered here today to join these two people in holy matrimony."
Integra looked over at the Queen. She was sitting on a throne just to the right of the pulpit. She could see everything. And although, she did look pleased at the marriage itself, Integra doubted if she agreed about the way it was being held. Integra returned her attention to the priest, who was droning on.
"Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited, it is never rude or selfish, it does not take offense and is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people's faults, but delights in the truth. It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope. It is always ready to endure whatever comes. True love does not come to an end."
"This love hasn't even come to a start." thought Integra.
"Sir James Lionel Wellington…"
"Your middle name is Lionel?" asked Integra.
"Yeah, my father named me after your father. I don't know why though." replied James.
"The two of them were best friends." said Integra. "I wouldn't be surprised if our union was planned from birth. Funny isn't it. My father thought of him as a friend and yet he has become my greatest enemy."
"…Will you take Integra Fairbrook Wingates Hellsing to be your lawfully wedded wife?"
"No, and I object to being forced to marry her." said James.
"Shut up boy. You can't object." scolded his father.
"Wilt thou love, honor, and cherish her…" continued the priest.
"But I don't want to marry her." objected James.
"What are you talking about? You fought Alucard for her and now you're backing out?" stated Sir Wellington, unbelieving of what he was hearing.
"She doesn't want to marry me." protested James.
"Of course she does." insisted Sir Wellington.
"No, I don't." said Integra, flatly.
"What? If you don't like him, why did you let him stay with you for three days?" asked Sir Wellington.
"So. We "hung out" for three days. What, I can't have any male friends?" quipped Integra, flashing him a wicked grin.
"Integra, this is not open for discussion. My son will sire your heir." vowed Sir Wellington.
"In sickness and in health, until death do you part." finished the Priest.
He waited for James to answer. James said nothing. Sir Wellington hit his son in the stomach with the back of his hand.
"Well?" asked the priest.
"I said no." said James, firmly.
"And do you, Integra Fairbrook Wingates Hellsing take James Lionel Wellington to be your lawfully wedded husband…" said the priest.
"Looks like this wedding is going to take place with or without our consent." sighed James. "Which side of the bed do you want?"
Integra looked at him and raised an eyebrow.
"Couch it is then." he laughed.
"No wonder Mouse chose you." whispered Integra. "You two have the same maniacal wit."
"…until death do you part." finished the priest.
"Speaking of which, he's late." whispered James.
"No, he just likes to make an entrance." assured Integra.
Suddenly, a huge wind blew through the church. People screamed as their hats blew away, and hair was blown into unruly mess. Windows shattered and a woman screamed as three humongous black dogs fell from the ceiling and landed in front of Integra and James. The dogs growled their displeasure as the knights tried to approach Integra.
"The dogs of the Devil." cried the priest.
"No, there not his." corrected Integra. "These are Alucard's."
The dogs continued growling and gnashing their teeth, as they backed the knights into a corner and kept them there. The palace guards tried to come to their aid, but the spirits of the dead rose from out the ground and blocked their path. Several people screamed as ghosts from the past arose in front of them. 52 dead knights rose from their catacomb graves, from beneath, the church and stood at the entrance of each pew. They successfully blocked the path of anyone who tried to leave or interfere.
Three thunderous knocks upon the sanctuary door and every head turned to see who was coming. The doors exploded off of their hinges and Alucard entered the room. Integra rolled her eyes when she saw what he was wearing. Alucard had put away his tux and this time opted for his black straightjacket with endless buckles. He strode up the isle. People gasped and cried out for God to save them as he passed. He moved ever forward in sure pursuit of his goal. He stopped only when he stood in front of Integra.
"What took you so long?" asked Integra, coldly.
"I stopped for ice cream." he retorted, looking her over in her wedding gown.
He raised an eyebrow. She was a beautiful woman. But there was a lot of fabric covering his woman. What fun it would be to tare all that fabric off of her and make love to her again. Alucard smiled.
"You look like a fabric sale at Harvey Nichols." teased Alucard.
"Shut up and get me out of here." commanded Integra.
"Oh, no you don't. We thought he might show up. Now!" shouted Sir Island.
At that moment, twenty guests on both sides of the church stood up and started chanting. Suddenly, a bolt of lightning from the Christ statue shot through Alucard blasting him into the middle of the room. Blue-white chains of spiritual energy engulfed Alucard and brought him to his knees.
"Alucard!" cried Integra.
Instantly, the dead knights and the devil dogs disappeared. Alucard knelt in the middle of the church and roared in anger and in pain.
"If you won't curb you dog, Sir Integra; we will." said Sir Wellington.
"Alucard." called Integra, mentally.
Alucard growled in agony as he looked at her and smiled evilly. The forty chanting priest got louder and louder. The spiritual chains grew bigger and thicker. They began crushing Alucard, like a boa constrictor happy with its meal. The audience was too stunned by events to even think of running.
"Now, Alucard, you will no longer terrorize the people of London or keep Sir Integra hostage. For your crimes, you will die." stated Sir Island, with authority and glee.
All were taken aback as Alucard started laughing.
"Me? Keep Integra hostage? It is you so called "gentlemen", you "holy knights" that have kept Integra hostage her whole life. And now you seek to steal her birthright from her by marrying her to a man that she doesn't love. HA HA HA HA. Who's the bad guy here, you or me?"
"Silence. We know what is best for her and the kingdom." shouted Sir Milton.
"I know what is BEST for ME!" yelled Integra.
"HA HA HA HA." laughed Alucard.
"Somebody shut him up." ordered Sir Kent.
Alucard's flesh actually started smoldering as the chains held him bound. Alucard growled and snarled as the chanting grew louder and the pain more intense. No one could bind him, none but a virgin. Where in all England did one find forty male virgins?
"Wonder why it hurts so much?" taunted Sir Island. "These priests are Eunuchs from the Vatican."
"HA HA HA, Eunuchs? Mouse is going to be mad. She was looking forward to hooking up with one of the best men." chuckled Alucard.
"Who is Mouse?" asked Sir Morse.
"I am." said a young girl, standing in the doorway.
"No, impossible. It can't be. You're dead." said Sir Kent. "I saw you die."
"I'm still dead." smiled Mouse, showing off her fangs.
"Impossible." restated Sir Kent.
"No way." cried Sir Morse.
"This can't be happening." whimpered Sir Jeffery.
"Mouse!" roared Alucard.
"Yeah, yeah. Keep your fangs on." said Mouse.
Mouse pulled out a CZ75D, walked down the isle, and began shooting the priests. One by one, they dropped to the ground. As each one fell, the spiritual chains got weaker and weaker, until Alucard was able to break free.
"Mouse!" shouted Integra. "How dare you shed blood on holy ground!"
"Relax, master. They're only tranquilizer darts. They'll be fine." assured Mouse.
Alucard stood in the middle of the room and roared a roar so thunderous and loud, that he commanded the attention of everyone there; even the Queen's.
"Hear me and hear me well. For this will be your LAST warning." said Alucard, in a strong and booming voice. "I have been benevolent to you and didn't kill you the first time. However, you WILL leave Integra to me OR not only will I kill anyone who tries to take her from me; I will destroy your entire family.
"Alucard." called Integra.
"What?" asked Alucard, as he came to her and stood in front of her.
Integra leaned forward and whispered in his ear.
"Really?" questioned Alucard, looking over at the Queen.
"Yes. If you mean to destroy the entire family, you will have to kill cousins of cousins of cousins. That could lead to other countries, retaliations, and world war. Not that you probably wouldn't like that." said Integra.
"No, I conquered the world once. I have no wish to do it again. Beside you people whine and complain about paying taxes, can you imagine having to pay levy to me as well." he grinned, evilly, remembering the good old days.
"Do try to keep the killing down to only the guilty." she ordered.
Alucard turned around and faced the audience once more.
"Alright, leave Integra Hellsing to me or I will kill everyone in your IMMEDIATE family." said Alucard, correcting himself.
Thus said, he turned back toward Integra and took her in his arms. One of the knights tried to step forward to stop him, but Mouse shot him in the back, and he fell asleep at the steps.
"Uh, Alucard." called James.
"What?" answered Alucard, growling at James.
"Do you mind releasing me from these before you go?" asked James.
Alucard looked at his handcuffs and smiled.
"Hold your hands up." ordered Alucard. "Higher."
James held his hands high over his head.
"Mouse." called Alucard.
Mouse shot at James' handcuffs and the chain separated, freeing his hands.
"Thanks." said James.
"Mouse."
"Yes, sir." responded Mouse.
"Its playtime." said Alucard.
"Alright." cheered Mouse.
Mouse put her guns away and made a guitar appear. She jumped up onto one of the pews and began singing.
"I got a little change in my pocket going jingle, lingle, ling. Want to call you on the telephone give you a ring. But each time I talk I get the same old thing; always no huggin, no kissin til I get a wedding ring. My honey, my baby, don't put my love on the shelf. She said don't give me no lines and keep your hands to yourself." sang Mouse.
Integra looked over Alucard's shoulder as he faded away.
"Playtime?" she questioned.
"It's how she erases people's memories. They won't remember a thing tomorrow." explained Alucard.
"You see I wanted her real bad, and I was about to give in. That's when she started talking bout true love, started talking bout sin. I said honey; I'll live with you for the rest of my life. She said no huggin, no kissin, til you make me your wife. My honey, my baby, don't put my love on no shelf. She don't hand me no lies and keep your hands to yourself." played Mouse.
James stared in awe at Mouse's ability to play the guitar. He also stood in absolute flabbergast as people started standing up and dancing to Mouse's music. The beat was fun and easy to keep to. He even found himself tapping his feet to the rhythm. Then he started laughing as he watched all these upper crust, stuffed shirt, VIPs dancing to Mouse's music. They couldn't help themselves, they were probably hypnotized. Still, it was the funniest thing that he had every seen. James doubled over with laughter.
"Stop it, James." commanded Sir Wellington, in anger at being bested.
"Oh, come on. Watching Sir John Marshall dancing on a pew is priceless." laughed James.
"Damn it. Why didn't you tell me there were two vampires in her house?" he growled.
"You didn't ask." smiled James, in his smugness.
Sir Wellington growled at his son. He was doing this on purpose. But James was not going to stop him. He had been playing this political game for far longer. He knew the meaning of patience and always having a plan 'B'.
"Well, you talked for three days. So what other secrets does Sir Integra hold?"
"She loves the color green. She hates incompetence and incompetent people. She keeps a picture of her father in her office. Her hair smells like strawberries because of her shampoo." teased James.
Sir Wellington growled at his son and stormed away. This was not over yet; not by a long shot.
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Note: song "Keep your hands to yourself" by the Georgia Satellites.