Author's Note

I realize that his story is very different, and sometimes even, strange. But, really, can one control one's dreams? I think not…

My friends and I have a tradition; every morning before school, we tell each other our dreams, no matter how strange… My friends and I find this one particularly hilarious, I hope you do too, but if you don't, I don't care, but if you do care that this is really off the wall... bite me.

Much Love,

Legolas Skies

P.S. This is based on our local Wal-Mart… So, I apologize if the layout doesn't match your Wal-Mart's.

One day, Harry, Hermione, and Ron went to Wal-Mart. Harry was so excited, he ran through the door with his arms in the air, and yelled "Oreos!" Harry likes Oreos.

Ron didn't want to come with Hermione and Harry. He was VERY afraid of the doors. He had always wanted to know how they moved by themselves… They're muggle doors for God's sake! So, Ron glared at the doors, and would NOT go through.

Hermione became impatient, "Jesus! Ron, they're just DOORS!"

"But they move! By themselves!"

"You are a freaking wizard. You should be used to things by themselves."

He still would not move.

"For God's sake," said Hermione, and dragged him through the door.

Ron and Hermione needed to get to the craft section, but to get there, they needed to pass the girl's clothing department…

Ron stopped in the middle of the aisle, and looked at a rack of bras. "Hermione?"

"Hmmm?"

"Do girls really wear these things?" he asked, holding one up.

"Yes Ron, we really do." She had stopped across the aisle, and was looking at material. She held up a rather pink and flowery piece. "Ron, how about this? I could make you a skirt!"

"Yeah, OK," said Ron, without even looking at her, he was preoccupied with a blue bra.

Hermione sighted and put it back on the shelf. Then, something caught her eye, flannel Gryffindor material! She held it up, "Ron, I'm making you pajama pants out of this!"

"OK, whatever you want," he said, now engrossed in a purple padded bra.

It was at that moment that Hermione had an idea, "Hey, Ron, will you go out with me?"

"Hermione," said Ron, starting to get angry, "I told you that I didn't care what you did, and that you should do whatever in the bloody hell you want!"

Hermione rolled her eyes, and dragged Ron away.

Next, Ron and Hermione went to the furniture section. It was there that they met Amanda, who was sleeping on a futon (A/N: Amada is my best friend… She is addicted to Wal-Mart, and is obsessed with Daniel Radcliffe… It is an inside joke that she lives at Wal-Mart.).

Harry chose that exact moment to run by with his arms in the air and exclaim, "Oreos!" Hermione and Ron could only assume that Harry had been unsuccessful in his great quest for Oreos.

Amanda jumped up, threw her arms in the air and yelled, "Harry!" and then tried to run after him, but Hermione caught her around the waist, and forced her to sit down on the futon. Hermione instructed Amanda to "sit!" and "stay!" Then Ron and Hermione went to see where Harry had gotten to.

Today was Harry's lucky day… he had finally found the Oreos that he had so diligently searched for. He sat in the middle of the aisle, and surrounded himself with mounds of Oreos, he even made a castle. When Ron and Hermione rounded the corner, Harry had his mouth stuffed FULL. He tried to say something to Hermione, "Der wuvil fuffed!"

"Huh?"

"Der wuvil fuffed!"

"What?"

"Der wuvil fuffed!"

"Wuvil fuffed? What the fuck?"

Harry swallowed, and said, "They're double-stuffed!"

"Oh, double-stuffed! Congrats, but we really need to go, we've wasted SO much time!

So, instead of battling the crowds, the trio went to a self check-out. I think that it is needless to say that Ron was afraid of the check-out, too. So, he was good and freaked out by the time that they were ready to leave. Again, Ron was an absolute pig-head about those doors, he planted himself in front of them and stared, but would not go through. Finally, Hermione just got behind him, and pushed him through, all you could hear was grunting, inaudible phrases, and the occasional cuss-word.

This was the story of Harry, Ron, and Hermione's very eventful afternoon at Wal-Mart. However, there is a VERY valuable lesson contained in this here story… double-stuffed Oreos are better than regular.

SO, DID YOU LIKE IT?

TELL ME, YOU KNOW YOOU WANT TO...

LEGOLAS