I remember back when Cassandra killed my father, I found out that another member of my family had their own secret. Touya, my big brother, was part of the Tigers. Well the Japan area Tigers. He had been with them for a long while. And soon I was adopted into the Tigers. I was the youngest there. Touya wouldn't allow me to get the Tiger tattoo until I was older, having been ten or eleven at the time. So I got a ring. It had a silver band and a red diamond encrusted in it. It was too big for my fingers so I wore it around my neck with a silver chain. It brought out my eyes, they said.

I... I came here by day, but I left here in darkness
And found you, found you on the way

I still have that ring. I never show it though. It's been hidden around my neck. That's why the Wolves never noticed. That's why the Tigers didn't know it was me, until they finally figured it out. I played with it. As much as I wanted to throw it away, there was some odd attachment I had to it.

'Nobody could forget those eyes.' I remember Gabriel said. He was right.

And now, it is silver and silent, it is silver and cold
You, in somber resplendence, I hold

Funny though. I met Gabriel through the Tigers. He was just a young kid as well. We were friends for a long time until we finally got the clue that maybe we should be more than friends.

So what I am saying when I say 'I caused my families death'…. When I left the Tigers after Gabriel died, they where enraged. I said I would never go back and that they could all burn in hell. They held that against me and killed my brother and whatever family I had left besides Cassandra. Why they never killed me is a mystery. Maybe its because I owed them. I got into a lot of trouble when I was younger. My fourteen to sixteen years, I got into drugs and started cutting myself. They helped me out. Got me back to my health. I caused them more trouble than I was worth. So to make it up, I was engaged to the next leader of the Tigers. Who that came out to be would have been Gabriel, but he died all too soon. So now I have no clue who that would be.

Your sins into me
Oh, my beautiful one
Your sins into me

I shook my head. Thinking about all this again was not a good idea. Even more being out by myself wasn't the best idea either.

I headed back to Ryu's house. It'd be better that I get back to Syaoran. It had been a few hours. Around lunch time now. As I got to the drive way and parked the motor bike I wondered if I could slip in unnoticed. I wanted to see Syaoran, but not just yet. I didn't want to explain anything. I looked at my options of how to get into the house.

As a rapturous voice escapes, I will tremble a prayer
And I'll beg for forgiveness

Climb up a tree and go through the window.

Magically teleport myself into the house.

Levitate my way through a window.

Or walk through the front door and cause myself to be noticed….nuh uh.

(Your sins into me) Your sins into me
Oh, my beautiful one

So if I had to pick, I'd magically teleport myself into the house. No back to the real world, I'd say climbing the tree and jump onto the balcony was my only option. I walked over to the tree, took a deep breath and started climbing. I thought I was doing pretty good up until I fell off. I managed to land on my hands and knee's. Not so good for my knee's. That really kind of hurt. I shakily stood up. I brushed myself clean.

Light, like the flutter of wings, feel your hollow voice rushing into me
As you're longing to sing

'Haha you cant climb me' the tree mocked.

"Oh just you wait. I'll cut you up into pieces and feed you to the fire." I grumbled.

"Who?" I heard behind me.

I turned around and low and behold…there's Syaoran. Standing there with the best face I've ever seen.

So I... I will paint you in silver, I will wrap you in cold
I will lift up your voice as I sink

'Ohhhh it's your lover boy.' I heard the tree.

"Oh I was uh talking to no one." I lied and turned back to the tree. I stuck my tongue out at it. I went around the other side of it to see if I had a better chance on that side to climb it. Syaoran came beside me. He looked up at the tree then back down to me.

Your sins into me
Oh, my beautiful one, now
Your sins into me

"What are you looking at?" He asked.

"The tree."

'Pahaha your hopeless' the tree said.

"Why?" Syaoran asked again. I guess now is the time for 21 questions.

"Because I'm trying to sneak into the house unnoticed."

As a rapturous voice escapes, I will tremble a prayer
And I'll beg for forgiveness

'Just try and climb me again.'

"Isn't that a little pointless now? I have already seen you." He laughed

"Well we could just pretend that you didn't see me, and then you could come into the room about fifteen minutes from now say 'gasp! Where did you come from' then my success will be complete." I explained.

(Your sins into me) Your sins into me

'If you try again your just going to fall, again'

I jumped up to the branch that was the closest to the ground. I wrapped myself on it and swung my body on top of it. I got up from there….but the damn tree was right…I fell, again. But thank god to the almighty Syaoran who caught me and we both landed on the ground beside each other.

"Stupid talking tree. I really need an axe." I mumbled.

I sat up slowly and rubbed my head. Syaoran also sat up, looked at me with the 'something is very wrong with you but you do it so well' look. He laughed, grabbed my waist and rolled so that he was mostly on me. I know he's not going to ask about earlier just yet. He'll take my mind off of it for a while, then ask.

Cold in life's throws, I'll fall asleep for you

The fallen leaves crunched under us. Syaoran laid his head down in between my head and shoulder and nuzzled my neck. My nose tingles as I feel a sneeze coming on.

I say "achoo"

Cold in life's throws, I only ask you turn away

Syaoran laughs into my neck. He plays with my hair. I love that feeling if I haven't said it before. I wonder where I would be now if Syaoran wasn't here. Well obviously back at Tai Diamond. Syaoran closes his eyes. It looks like he's falling asleep, but he still plays with my hair. I hold his other hand and he squeezes it tightly as if he will never let go.

I go "achoo"

Cold in life's throws, I'll fall asleep for you

I must either have a cold or I'm allergic to the tree. I can still hear it in my head saying 'I make you sneeze, now how are you going to climb me? I don't see any wings on you'. As much as I have a newly formed grudge for it, the tree did look really nice from on the ground. Its orange coloured leaves fell lightly around me and Syaoran. It kind of reminded me of that time when Syaoran and me where on the swing back at the gang's house. It's just one of those things you never forget. God I'm starting to sound like a romantic….ugh.

Cold in life's throws, I only ask you turn

Kodak moment.

As they seep... into me, oh, my beautiful one, now

………………………………...

So yes I say me and Syaoran fell asleep there. It was about nightfall when we woke up. We were tangled up in each other bodies. My arms where around his waist as my head rested on his chest. Syaoran' s arms where around me as well, one under my head and around my shoulder and the other one on my waist. Our legs were tangled up as well. I was really wanting to move cause I was so hungry that I could've eaten Syaoran. Maybe I'm a cannibal at heart. Maybe I should just stop thinking about cannibalism. Maybe I should just stop thinking.

I carefully moved Syaoran's arms from around me and his head off of my chest. Time to dominate this tree. I rubbed my hands together and started up the tree. I sat on the first branch and looked down. Syaoran was still sleeping like the dead sleeper he is. He'll wake up soon. I stand up on the branch and climb my way up to where the window of me room is. Yep. That was harsh on the knees. The tree is still mocking me. 'So now what are you gonna do? Jump to that window? Paha what a joke.' This time I agree with the tree….I'm stuck. Maybe I could call for help. Maybe that's not such a good idea. Maybe I could just climb back down.

……..deal

I climb back down slowly. I say slowly because I nearly got a branch through my stomach causing a near death experience. I swing off the last branch and my ungraceful-ness makes my fall flat on my face. I grumble and sit up, brushing the dirt off of my now swollen face.

"Ever think of using the font door? I hear it works wonders now a days." Syaoran smirks at me. I just want to take that smirk and shove it into the ground.

"Funny. I don't remember giving you the Oscar for great inventions." I shoot at him.

"Sorry. Bad mood." I say soon after.

"How about we get supper? I'm starving." Syaoran comments getting me and him up at the same time. Kind of a funny dance move if you thought about it real hard….cause apparently I just did.

"Nah. I figured I'm gonna become anorexic and wither away slowly." My stomach disagrees and makes the loudest growl the century has heard.

"Right. Well come on anorexic girl. I hear we have steak waiting for us."

God, I could never go hungry….But I'd be such a dummy if I said I liked god in the slightest. I hate him more than he loves me.

………………………………...

No way.

"You're serious about this?"

"uh yeah. You've done it before."

"I also almost got killed doing it."

"You're exaggerating."

"But why?"

"Cause we need money or something."

"So you'd put my life on the line?"

"I'll be with you."

"Why couldn't it have been street motorbike racing? I'm good at that."

"You are also good and street car racing. People will bet a lot of money on you."

Syaoran must die. So my past comes to haunt me again. Lucky us, there's a street car race in town today, and guess what Syaoran did? I'll give you one guess….no he didn't bet money on a frog. He signed us both up for it. And if I had my gun handy he would not be a live any more. I glared at him. If I survived this then maybe I'll forgive him.

………………………………...

'Hokay. You've done this before Sakura.'

Syaoran pulls up beside me and smiles at me….that smile had to die.

The red light turns yellow.

'…This should be easy. No body else is here. Just you and the road….and you're comforting yourself….god I'm fucking crazy.'

Yellow light turns green….green means go…

So I go.

It's me behind one other person and Syaoran beside me.

'Gotta pass this guy. Gotta pass this guy. Gotta pass this guy….oh god I'm passing this guy.'

I look out of the window at the person next me. He looks at me. And that's when I know. That's when I freak. That's when I swerve.

Now don't get all worried. I recover quickly.

'Just don't look at him. The road. Look at the road.' So I look at the road. I look at who is in front of me. Syaoran is. And up coming is the finish line. And guess who is trying to pass us. That's when I have a plan.

I speed up. Do I know what I'm doing? Of course not. Why? Cause I'm a retard who wants to get herself killed apparently. Syaoran stays at the same speed. Good that's what I need. Now no one could ever try this except if you are as crazy as me. When I get close enough to Syaoran's car, I speed up and the wheels of the car bring me up onto the top of Syaoran's car and I ramp off of it. Brining me in the lead and over the finish line. Like I said. No trying that. I spin until I stop. Syaoran gets to me and looks wigged out and excited at the same time.

"My god how the hell did you manage to pull that out of your ass?" He breaths out.

I cant even speak. I'm off in a different world where elephants fly and birds choke on their own musical notes.

"Him." oh. I guess I can speak now?

"Him who?" Syaoran asks. I look at him.

"Him. Tiger. He's here. I saw him." That's when I remember.

Syaoran doesn't know Tiger.

"Sakura, who's Tiger? Is he…Oh." I think dumb ass gets it.

"Leader of the Tigers. They're here too. I know it." Money is being thrust into our hands and through the window of the car. People are clapping and saying 'good job.' While I'm freaking out.

Screaming. I hear screaming. I look through the window and see motorbikes running through the crowds of people. And I'm thinking….'Shit.'

"Get in! We have to go!" I say to Syaoran. He doesn't say a word, just jumps into the car and I drive as fast as hell could take me. Syaoran pulls out his. And I'm thinking, 'did he plan this?'

The motor bikes follow us out onto the streets, so does Tiger's car. Bullets pierce the back window. Syaoran sticks his arm out and shoots back. One….Two…Three bikes go down. Still not enough to get them away from us.

"Take the wheel. I got a plan." I say to Syaoran. He grabs the wheel as I let go and climb into the back seat. Do I really know what I'm doing? Of course not. Why? Maybe I have money stuck in my ears and in my brain. Maybe I'm just an idiot. My bet is on the money brain.

I start flinging things out of the window. Glass, used bullets, little metal things…paper. I kind of hoped that the glass or metal would get stuck in a tire or jump up into the engines. I saw one bike go down. Great going Sakura, you're a real thinker. Give me bubble soap and I'm deadly.

So that plan gone down, I grabbed Syaoran's gun and started shooting. I must have been really out of practice cause I was missing pretty badly. Eventually I got a couple down, but this time, I was aiming for Tiger's car. Take out the leader and you take out the rest…right? Too bad I only managed to get the front window until they started dangerously shooting very close to my head, but they were only missing by inches. Like the never wanted to hit me. I turned to look at Syaoran, he was fine. They hadn't hit him…yet.

The car swerved, and I got pushed backwards on the seat. My head bounced off the door and I swear I heard my brain crack. I swore and looked around. Everything was kind of spirally and my head hurt like a bitch. I couldn't get up. Cause if I did, what I last ate would be all over the car.

"Sakura? You okay?" Syaoran calls back to me.

Yeah I'm just fine. But I need a wrench to shove my head back into place.

"Yes." I lied. I'm good at that….sometimes.

"Just lay there Sakura. I think I've almost lost them."

Where the hell else do you expect me to go?

The sounds of bullets exiting the guns lowered. And eventually they stopped. I couldn't hear any motorbikes or cars after us either. I tried to sit up but large invisible boulders sat on my head. I felt warm blood trickle down my neck. Just great. If I don't die from dizziness, I'll die from blood loss first.

The car rolled to a stop. That settles it; I'll die from blood loss. Syaoran got out of the car, looked around for a minute then opened up the back door. Syaoran's head looked a little off and fuzzy.

"Shit." Syaoran says.

No. Not shit. Blood, Syaoran, its called blood.

He slowly sat me up and looked at the back of my head. He pulled one of those movie moves, and ripped off the arm of his shirt. He dabbed near the top of my neck. Is that where I hit myself? Cause by the way my head hurt I could have sworn I hit my skull.

"Is your eye sight blurry?" He asked.

Since when are you the professional?

"Yes."

"Okay, I'm going to get you to Ryu's house. He has a doctor there. Just try to stay awake." Syaoran laid me back down. He left the cloth under my neck. Some good that'll do. Course it could be the difference between saving my life or not.

The inside of the car looks yellow. Or is that eggshell? Maybe it's just white. No. Taupe. No wait, maybe just white. No, its eggshell…Or is it black? Maybe it's blue. Or a really dark purple. No…definitely yellow.

Well I'm glad that I'm working on my paint knowing skills while my head feels like it's going to fall off. Every time the car went over a bump my head joggled, sending pain through my head. This was so much fun. This is the best fun I think I've had in years. I just have to ignore the pain and fuzziness and I think I'll do just dandy….Since when do I use the word dandy?

I only realized we had stopped when Syaoran flung open the door and pulled me out. Ryu was there, along with Mei Lin. My eye sight is getting better I guess. Well…not really. They had giant heads and buck teeth. Kind of like a bunch of squirrels.

Syaoran carried me like I was a bride into the house and up to a weird white room…or was it yellow? Things were sticking out of the floor. Things shined in my eyes. You'd think this was like a horror flick. But the trio of squirrel heads made it all worth while.

……………………………

Mono.

I think I have mono.

I'm conscious some of the time. Well at least I think I am. Maybe I just think I'm conscious but I'm really not. Maybe I'm just delusional. Maybe I should just stop thinking.

I heard Syaoran come in. At least I think it was Syaoran. There was another person there too. Could it be god?...Nah. Never in my lifetime.

"She got a concussion." One guy said.

No, I have mono dumb ass.

"Is she going to be awake soon?" Syaoran said.

Yes, I'm awake now dumb ass.

"I'm not sure. She is slipping in and out of consciousness."

Hence the mono.

I felt something grab my hand. So I squeezed it.

"I- I think she's awake." Syaoran says.

"No kidding dumb ass. I've been awake for a while now." So I can talk now….great.

I still couldn't move very well, except my hand. Oh. Wait, wait. I got some feeling in my leg. I wiggled my toes. Well it felt like I did. The feeling crawled up to my knee. I tried to bend it. It looked like an odd bending pole. Wait, feeling is coming to my hips. That was good. Success! My back now had feeling. I swung over the side of whatever I was laying on. Of course that didn't come without some dizziness….stupid me, like always.

"I should probably give you some pills to help you sleep." The unknown guy says.

"Give me any drugs and they will be shoved up your ass." I said, walking awkwardly away.

"Sorry. She's not a morning person. I'll make sure she gets to bed." I heard Syaoran say.

"I've had enough sleep to last me ages. I don't neeee-" I wobbled on my feet. I grasped onto the wall for support. Syaoran smirked at me, not making any move to help me.

"I hate you."

"I know you do darling." His smile grew.

Since when in hell does he call me darling?

I grumbled curses at the world and tried to struggle up from the wall. That took effort that I didn't have. I wanted to take Syaoran's smile and throw it to the ground and stomp on it.

"Bastard." I murmured as I passed Syaoran.

"Want to tell me what happened a couple days ago?" I was half way down the hall when Syaoran's voice floated to me.

I don't want to tell you Syaoran.

"It's complicated."

And I just broke rule number one.

"Then explain it to me."

……………………………

It took longer than hell to explain my situation to Syaoran. He looked so confused and he didn't know what to think. Neither did I. Hell, I was the one who was caught up in this in the first place.

"So you basically belong to them."

"I a sense…I owed them my life. And I walked away from it. From them. This in turn got my family killed."

Syaoran wouldn't look at me. Or was that couldn't? Either way, he was mad. At me? Hard to tell. At Tiger? I have no clue. Why? Cause I'm an idiot if we don't already know this.

"There's no way I can avoid this without getting you killed. It's what happened at Magila. It's what will happen if I resist anymore." I say.

"So you're just going to give yourself up?"

Wow. Shock me.

"No. You know I wouldn't do that. I'm trying to figure out something that doesn't include us running away all the time."

"Why didn't you tell me this earlier?" Syaoran said.

His head snapped up to look at me and I swear my heart stopped and I went of in Nightmare land. There, I ran around in the crumpling flowers being chased my little horned things. Then my heart started again. And all it took was one second.

"Because I was trying to hide it. From myself mostly. I lied to myself constantly until I completely forgot. But a couple of days ago, my fears came back to haunt me." I explained.

I couldn't or I wouldn't look at Syaoran now. I remember this game. 'Stare at anything but Syaoran' game. But the game was put to a stop. Syaoran hand clasped on my chin and made me look at him. Did I want to? Of course not. Why? I have no idea.

I'm thinking, 'is this day over yet.'

"Didn't anything trigger your memory at all when we first came in contact with the Tigers? I want to believe you but this whole situation seems a little off."

He doesn't believe me.

"No. Nothing did. I spent years trying to forget. That's why it didn't come back to me easily."

And here's poor me trying to get him to believe what has happened to me.

He doesn't believe me.

"No. I think the fact that you were once a drug addict made you slow."

Ouch. That really hit me bad. Like a low blow to the stomach.

Syaoran let go of my chin and I got up. I walked to the door of our bedroom. I stared at it. I imagined it was in its underwear. Just to cheer me up. Then Syaoran tried another movie stunt.

"No wait. Sakura I didn't mean-"

"If you didn't mean it why did you say it?"

…..

"I thought so. I'm going to go be a druggy some more outside if you need me." Syaoran didn't follow.

Funny thing is, almost all of Tomoeda, Japan…everyone who was anyone was a druggie. Whether you were a small kid or and old timer, you had tried it or was addicted to it. That's how Tomoeda worked. I was one of the only ones who, out of few, who got 'unaddicted'. Really, if it wasn't for the Tigers, I'd either be dead or a human vegetable. So I really did owe them my life. Did I want to? Of course not. But if it came down to them killing Syaoran, would I? Of course. As much as I hated the damn bastard, I wouldn't let him die.

"I have something to tell you too." Syaoran says, coming up behind me.

I know you do Syaoran, but I don't want to know now.

"I've been keeping something from you and I know you know."

Do I have to get tape to shut you up?

"You didn't know why I was sent to Tai Diamond. And I think you should know."

I don't want to know. Stop talking. Don't tell me.

"I murdered people."

No.

"That man in the picture beside my dad trained me to be an assassin. I know you saw things on the news about a mass murderer."

Stop talking. Please just stop talking.

"Tai Diamond isn't a boarding school. It's a rehab/ reform school. That's where kids that have lost their mind go. That's why it was so secured. That's why no one ever got out."

I don't want to hear anymore.

"I'm sorry that I kept that from you. But now we are square. You know my secret, and I know yours."

I turned to Syaoran. I looked up at him but I really didn't want to. Why? Because I am crying. I am weak. I don't deserve to have Syaoran.

"I love you."

………………………………….

Ho'kay so I know I haven't updated in a VERY long time but stupid me started another story that I got caught up in. Hence the lack of updating.