Chapter 30

I don't own Inuyasha

Ikuto was in his room studying when Suno came inside to observe him. Ikuto was so concentrated with his books that he didn't even notice his brother staring at him for about five minutes. When he finally noticed, he asked "Home from work?"

"It's a little after midnight, Ikuto. You know I get home no later than midnight. Why are you studying so late, and what has possibly possessed you to actually study without force?"

"I just decided to work on school. I've got to think about my priorities." He sighed. "Remember what we were discussing earlier about that place in the U.S.?" He put his U.S. history book down and looked at Suno. Suno could tell he was upset by the look in his eyes. To avoid the obvious upcoming conversation, Ikuto started another one. "You know, they really don't explain in our schools about what happened in World War II."

Suno started to play along. "Well, we lost. No one likes to lose."

"All of their students learn of their defeats, pain, and losses. Why don't we?"

Suno took a seat on Ikuto's bed. "Well you see we have a lot of pride. We lost a lot of people. We really don't want to be reminded of that. As for as the people in the U.S., when they lost, they learned that because they pulled back, other countries discovered that if they hold out a little longer, then the U.S. might go away. That's what happened at Vietnam. They want to learn of their mistakes. They dropped a bomb on us, one that we couldn't withstand, at least not another attack."

"Oh." He turned back to his book. "I wish I lived there. I know that must make you angry, but I wish it everyday."

"Ikuto" Suno said "You know, painful things that happened should be remembered. I believe that we should learn more of World War II. It was painful, but learning from the pain is what makes us stronger. I respect Americans for the fact that they do remember their pain, the only thing about pain, is that you shouldn't let it consume you."

"Like mom and dad? I shouldn't forget what happened to them?"

"You wouldn't let yourself, even if you tried. I know you've tried. It still scares you. It wakes you up in the middle of the night when you think of how she never got to read that book to you one more time." Ikuto dropped his book and turned around, trying to conceal his hurt and anger. "Forgetting them doesn't save you from the memory, remembering them is what saves you from the memory of their death. Your problem is that you assume that I was never upset about my father or your mother, but I didn't let you see it, because I had to be strong. There is no such thing as mourning together. It would have been a break down for the both of us, and I wouldn't be where I was today."

"You're still cold and insensitive!"

"Yeah, and so are you on some levels. Get over it. Insensitive people make the best decisions because they don't consider people's feelings. Now about marriage and other things, you should know how to be sensitive to some things. I am still utterly lacking in some areas, but she's not perfect, no relationship is. Yours and Kagome's relationship wasn't perfect, and it failed."

"How did you know?"

"Isn't it obvious?"

"It's not like I'm moping around."

"I know, and I thought you most certainly would, but you're stronger than that. You retreating to your studies is a pleasant surprise."

Ikuto was embarrassed, so he turned his head from his brother, so Suno couldn't see Ikuto's face, and so Ikuto couldn't see his face. "Well, I didn't get much sleep thinking about her, and then I had to think about why. I was so much like this other guy she liked, and that's why she started to like me. Then I started to think of my other faults. Now that I think about it, I know I have a lot of faults, things I hadn't even realized before. It's a scary thing, looking at yourself and finding the worst qualities. I am...I am ungrateful, Suno. I've finally realized something about me, you, and father, and how he felt. Now that I know, I want to fix the qualities that I'm lacking in. I miss Kagome, but I am still mad at her. I love her and all, but I don't want to mope around all day thinking about how things could have been. I would like to get myself straight first."

Suno nodded his head. "Understandable. This is the way you should be thinking." Just before Suno left out, he asked "Oh, and what would you like for your birthday?"

Ikuto turned around confused as if he didn't understand. "My birthday?" He began to think about what day it was. "Oh yes, my birthday is coming up very soon. What would I like?" He shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know."

"I'll think of something." Suno then left his brother alone to his thoughts.

'My birthday is coming up. I totally forgot that my birthday was so close. Kagome has been taking up a lot of my time, and with the Feudal Era stuff that just happened it's no wonder why it all slipped my mind.'

Kagome was upset, but she had managed to find her way to that little diner where she and Ikuto went on their first date. She had gone out for a while, trying to clear her head and just ended up in that spot. She had some money, along with a rumbling stomach, so she went in and took a seat. It was lunch, a busy time, but a waiter got her order in pretty quickly. 'This place had great burgers…'

"Hello?" asked a girl behind Kagome.

Kagome turned around and saw the worst person that she could possibly see at this point of time. "You're Lari, aren't you?"

Lari nodded hesitatingly. "Yes, and you're Kagome, the girl Ikuto's dating now." Lari noticed the pain in Kagome's eyes. "Do you mind if I sit with you?"

'Yes.' "No go right ahead." Kagome didn't really want Lari to sit next to her, but she wanted to know what had happened between Ikuto and her. "If you don't mind me asking, why did you and Ikuto break up?"

Lari froze up for a moment as if Kagome had asked something so very horrible. "Uh…well I don't like to talk about it. I'm not proud of what I did." She looked away from Kagome. "I'm still ashamed of what I did, Kagome. Please, don't…"

"If you don't want to tell me, then that's alright. I was just curious. You see…" she sighed "I just broke up with him too. Well, he broke up with me. I just wanted to know, since I know that you regret breaking up with him. He really is a great guy. I still wish…I still wish I could be with him."

"Ka…Kagome, please don't interrupt my story then. Please listen until I finish." Kagome nodded in agreement. "You're going to find me so horrible, Kagome, I know you will. I have done something horrible." She sighed. "Things were great at first. We went out to a lot of places, and he was my first boyfriend. I think I was his first girlfriend. His brother didn't believe in a lot of girlfriends, he believed that you needed one good wife, so he hadn't dated before, and had every intention of finding out if I was the one. We had known each other for a long time, so he asking me wasn't spontaneous. We got along well and he was so handsome. As we went out, we decided to like each other even more."

Kagome noticed the smile on her face. She really did care about him, which only made her more curious to why they would break up. 'Ikuto said she was always somewhat uncomfortable with him because he was half black. It doesn't sound like it.' Then suddenly, Kagome noticed her expression change. Her smile fell and her eyes filled with so much sadness.

"You see, it was nice at first, but then my parents didn't like him, you know, because of how he is. I was being verypressured. Then I was pressured at school. No one really gave us a chance, and I guess I wasn't strong enough to deal with it. I finally reached my breaking point one day at a school dance. He had never gone to one before. It was supposed to be a special night for him. Then, I really screwed things up for him, because I wasn't strong enough."

"'Hey,' he told me 'I'm going to get us some punch. Would you like some punch?' I nodded. I remember him being so excited about everything. He had really never been out to a dance before and I should have made it special, but by this time, I had already been discriminated against for being with him. So many people had said so much. I didn't want to be hated by everyone. "

She hesitated to go on. "Kagome I can't. I can't say anymore. It's absolutely horrible."

"I swear I won't judge you if you tell me. I'm just curious and you've said so much already. I've just got to know how this story ends."

"But...It was hard. It was hard being with him. I heard people talking about him and then talking about me. Then he came and I did the worst possible thing that I ever could have done. I met Koashu and I did something so horrible…" She slightly shook with guilt. "There was a long line at the punch line. Ikuto was taking forever, and that's when Koashu walked over to me, looking dashing, yet devilish in his tuxedo.'Well, the freak's finally got a girlfriend?' Koashu said to me. 'And what might your name be?'"

"His friends started to surround me, and I…I panicked. I said 'Oh, you mean Ikuto? He's not really my boyfriend. I'm just…using him for money. I'd never go out with someone like him….'" She put her head down in shame. "I knew it was a horrible thing to do, but that's what I said. Koashu didn't quite believe me, but I didn't know that. I was just so nervous trying to get him to leave me alone that I didn't even realize that I was giving him the right ammo. He continued talking to me, and then suddenly the conversations became more and more about Ikuto and how he hated him and how I supposedly hated him as well, until Ikuto was finally done and back with our drinks. I can only imagine how horrible things must have been for him when he saw Koashu and me together."

Kagome just sat and absorbed everything in, even though she began to get angry slowly.

"Then Koashu began to tell Ikuto that I wasn't interested in him and that I was just only with him as a joke, and when Ikuto looked towards me to prove everything wrong, I just looked away and let Koashu keep on talking." Lari struggled not to lose it. She was starting to get very emotional. "You see, then Ikuto tried to take me back, but Koashu pushed him back and then Koashu told Ikuto that I would rather be with him than with Ikuto. Instead of saying the truth, I…" She wiped her eyes before any tears came out. "I told him Koashu was right, and before I knew it, I was actually kissing Koashu…right in front of Ikuto."

Kagome's mouth accidentally dropped. She wanted to stand up and just slap her for doing something so horrible, but she said she wouldn't judge.

"It was a horrible thing to do. It made him so angry. It was then that the biggest war of the century took place. Ikuto struck Koashu and then they all started fighting. Ikuto got kicked out, but Koashu didn't, even though Ikuto was jumped by Koashu and his friends." She was shaking with guilt. "I just stood there and let it happen. I just stood there and made a mockery out of him. I'm so ashamed of myself." She couldn't hold her tears any longer. "I could never ask him for forgiveness, nor do I think that I could accept it." She looked up into Kagome's raging eyes. "I'm so horrible Kagome. You promised you wouldn't judge, but I don't care. I did something so horrible. You deserve to speak cruelly about me."

Kagome was furious. She couldn't believe that anyone would want to hurt sweet Ikuto intentionally in such a way. How could she not say something to Lari? "How could you?" Kagome asked quietly. "Ikuto's so wonderful, and yet you treated him like that? He deserves better!" Kagome felt convicted of her own mistake, but nothing could compare to what Lari did. "He's a great guy."

"I know Kagome, and I don't deserve him." She wiped her tears away. "Kagome, I want you to take care of him." She didn't say another word, and Kagome didn't have another word to say to her either. They both knew how horrible she was. There was no need on dwelling on it. Lari soon left, feeling like the silence was too awkward.

'Now I feel even worse.'

"You alright?" asked Sarah as she entered Ikuto's room. He still had his nose in his book.

"If this is the speech about how I should try to hook up with Kagome again, then I don't want to hear it. I'm not ready for it."

"I know you really care about her."

"Of course I do, but I'm still ticked off at her for what she just did. I'm not going to apologize any time soon to that girl."

"We all know that you love her, Ikuto. She was perfect for you. I had never seen you so happy."

"I think Kagome's emotions are way too complex right now. I don't even think she knows what she wants. She's too young to get into a relationship. She makes a lot of bad choices and a lot of mistakes. I don't know if she's mature enough for a serious relationship."

She sighed. "You sound super mature right now, and almost too much like your brother. I love your brother, but man, does he have some issues!"

"I'm not trying to be like Suno." Ikuto had begun to get frustrated with everyone around him. "It's just that she's going to end up going back to the Feudal Era and I'm not exactly going to follow her. Inuyasha will have access to her again, and then we really can't be together. I think I might just be sick of trying so hard. If she doesn't know what she wants, then I don't need her."

"Man you're stubborn!"

"Why are you women so naïve? If Kagome is that confused, then she doesn't need to be in a relationship right now. She needs to make up her mind!"

"I'm just saying don't shut her out completely. She is a good girl, Ikuto. She really does care about you, more than you know." Sarah left Ikuto to his thoughts. He cared for Kagome still, but Kagome did need to make a choice. Playing volleyball wasn't going to work.

To Be Continued…

ONE PROMISE: Sesshoumaru will be in this story! Just wait for a little bit longer!

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