Four years later, Biko and I did get married. Dillan was almost five and was so ready for kindergarten it wasn't even funny. I was wrong in thinking that he might not have loved Biko. Biko was his favourite person in the entire world, excluding me, of course. My mom came down for the wedding as expected and she met Alexandra for the first time. I was still a little angry with her for not supporting me when I needed it most, and she did not try and pursue a relationship with Alexandra, even though they could communicate fine. Sometimes people do things and I will never know why.
I wish I had waited until my wedding night to be with a guy. Even though I hadn't slept with anyone for years now, I could never erase the memories. I will always have the images of the other guys I dated and saw over the years and that is something that will never leave me no matter how much I love Biko. On the other hand, I was so thankful that Biko had waited, because now, all his memories were of us and I loved him for it.
He looked so handsome as I walked down the aisle towards him. My heart still skipped a beat whenever I saw him. Even if we had waited to get married, the spark never died out; on the contrary it developed and became stronger. I thanked God everyday for brining me to such a wonderful, loving and godly man and allowing us to be united.
My dress was not the fairytale wedding dress that every girl imagines she will have like in books. It was quite simple actually. It was cream coloured but Elise, who was my matron of honour, insisted that it was white. The neckline went into a V shape with a train of material flowing down the back on the back. True to my childhood dreams I got married on the front lawn of the church and Steve flew in to marry us all the way from Africa. It was small but very sentimental. I didn't want to invite my dad but in the end, Biko convinced me and I forgave him for all the hurt and humiliation he had made me suffer. Even if I did invite him, he didn't come because he was in jail… for sexual abuse and possession of an illegal narcotic. It wasn't me who turned him in for either offence. My mom walked me down the aisle, with Elise and Alexandra ahead of me. We said our I Do's and that was that, we were married.
The bad thing about having a kid before you get married is you can't go for such a long honey moon. Mom still didn't want to get to know Dillan so the Lavoie's volunteered to stay with him. We left for ten days to Hawaii and came back to start our new life together as husband and wife. The night we got home I had one of those nights where you think about all the events that lead you up to that one moment in time. It was amazing how God coordinated every little mistake, word, action and person in my life.
He even used those horrible moments with my dad so that I would be able to talk about them to others. He brought me to Africa. He led me to Biko. He led me to Elise. So many things in my life resulted from other things. Even though I didn't think that things would get better when I was in those moments, they miraculously did. All I needed to do was to give it over to God, and ask Him to show me how to use my experiences.