Disclaimer: Since my dear brother forgot. This is the All Encompassing Disclaimer.

I don't own anybody here except me, the house and property we live on.

My co-authors want to own themselves but we all know they belong to greedy corporations.

After being threatened with lightsabers and being ignored I have reluctantly agreed to let my other co-authors have a turn writing their experience. Except Erik who is busy trying to tune the piano in our house. Good luck, that thing refuses to be tuned.

Erik: It will obey!

Warious: Good luck.

The Continuing Saga of Two Sith Lords

By Captain James Hook and Warious.

Since when are you writing MY chapter?

"Since I'm going over it for grammar, spelling, and keeping it PG-13." Warious replied.

Anyway, going back to where Darth Maul left off.

o.o.o.o.o.

After that conversation, Warious made lunch and introduced the Frenchie to hamburgers and fries. I, having already been exposed to Warious' cooking, was already familiar with the American diet. I still needed to pretend I didn't know a thing about the twenty-first century.

You see, Warious and I had been contact for over a year in Neverland. We eventually grew closer then either of us had originally intended. But how she got into Neverland I will never understand.

A week ago she came up with a plan to get me out of Neverland. She gave me instructions I would have to carry out on my own. She would need to be on the other end to pull me through. How then, did this other man get pulled here? I'll have to ask Warious later.

She had told me to act like we didn't know each other so her brother, that strange horned person, didn't suspect a plot.

I think I pulled this off quite well…until Warious sat next to me for lunch.

I resisted the urge to pull her closer to me, but only with great difficulty. I wanted to touch her, but she was just out of reach. Pure torture.

I noticed that this, Erik, ate very little. Warious chatted with him in French. I wondered what they were talking about. She seemed to be very familiar with him. Much of what I could understand of their conversation was informal. I was starting to feel jealous.

When lunch was over Warious told Maul to show Erik to the guest room and see if he could find some clothes to fit. He was, As I soon noted very tall.

Then Warious told me to follow her so I would see where I was going to sleep, and see if she could find something 'normal' I could wear.

I walked into her room and was bombarded by colorful, what she called, fuzzy posters. A majority of which were either Dragon or Unicorn.

"Um, do you mind sharing the bed?" Warious asked.

Right…

"I mean, HEY! Not like that!" She added once she figured out what I was thinking.

"But why not?" I smirked. This was bound to be a fun conversation.

She glared at me. "You know perfectly well 'why not'."

I grinned at her. "I sure we can get away with some things." I love it when she blushes. It's become somewhat of a game for me to make her do so. I pulled her to me with my left hand. "Like kissing perhaps?"

"Maul might come in and see." Warious half-heartedly protested.

"Good," I replied. "It might send him into shock and then I could have you to myself."

"You are a bad man." She said affectionately, but then kissed me before I could say anything else.

After she broke the connection she plopped down on the bed. "So how do you feel? Any side affects of coming out of Neverland?"

"Nothing that I can notice," I replied sitting down next to her. "How do you know Erik and why is he here?"

"I figured you would ask that," Warious sighed. "I got knocked into that time period by a surge in the Force when I was about eight-years-old. I hung out with Erik for about three years before another Force Surge happened sending me back to the same time I had left. As for how he got here, I really don't know. He said that Christine had chosen to go the Viscount De Changy. He was waiting to die when he suddenly found himself behind Maul and reacted the only way he knew when threatened."

"That's what you two were talking about at lunch then?"

"Yup. Sad, very sad. I thought she had better sense then choosing that rich loser." This was followed by a derogatory description that made me blush. Something that is very hard to do.

In an attempt to distract her from continuing on in this manner I pointed to an odd looking box sitting on a desk and asked, "What is that?"

Warious' mood changed so fast I swore it wasn't human. "That is a computer! The most wonderful of technological advancements after the DVD and CD, and there's fanfiction on it. Wanna see some?"

And before I could answer she switched it on and pulled me over to the chair next to hers.

"You have some fan fictions about you. Click this to move down the page. Have fun!" Warious left the room and me.

I started to read…and immediately whished Warious could explain what this was all about.

Getting up I stuck my head out the door to see where she was and immediately found a rope around my neck. Quickly I sliced through the rope with my hook and turned to look at my assailant. Erik.

"What in bloody hell was that for?" I demanded.

He said something in French and stalked off. I decided it was safer in Warious' room and went back in and pulled something by Plato off her bookshelf.

Warious came in a few minutes later with food and drink. "Got some snacks for us. Why aren't you reading the stuff on the computer?" she asked.

"I can't understand it. What am I doing with Wendy Darling in bed? That's disgusting."

Warious glanced at the screen. "Oops…my bad. Maybe you shouldn't read it."

"By the way," I continued, "Erik just tried to strangle me, and said something to me in French but I couldn't understand what he said."

"Erik tried to strangle you? And you survived? This is a new piece of history."

"Explain Warious. I don't know anything about him."

"And I prefer you didn't either!" A voice came though the door.

"Erik, be nice. Come in while you're at it." Warious called.

"But…"I tried protesting.

"But what Pirate?" Erik said entering.

"You just tried to kill me!"

"So? You lived didn't you?"

"Yes but that isn't the point!" I said standing up. I was still shorter then he by a half foot. "You attempted to kill me and I haven't done anything to you!"

"He didn't do anything to Peter Pan and Pan cut off his hand." Warious said to Erik.

"Hmmmm."

I don't think I'm going to enjoy being in the same area as this man at all. Warious seemed very…comfortable with his presence however.

"Come! See! Computer!" She said to him. Yes she said it like that. "Come see! You have Phans!" She had an odd gleam in her eye. The kind that says 'I'm up to no good and I'm going to enjoy it'. Never a good sign.

Reluctantly Erik sat at the computer and read what ever horror Warious set before him.

He sat there in what I perceived to be a shocked stupor for a while before Warious prompted with a maniacal gleam in her eye. "Well? What do you think?"

"That was…interesting…I think…"

"Terrible yes?" I asked.

He nodded. "You have had a similar encounter?" He asked.

"At least you're liked. Most people make me out to be a pedophile or a sickening old man." I replied.

"Hey! Some people recognize your gentlemanly-ness. It's not like EVERYONE hates you! I don't." Warious scolded me.

"Warious, if you are not capable of finding my face and way of living atrocious, then obviously you can handle a hook-handed pirate." Erik pointed out. Which reminded me…

"By the Way," I started, but before I could finish the sentence both Warious and Erik turned to me.

"Absolument pas!" They said in unison.

"What? I didn't even have a chance to say what it was!" I protested.

"We didn't need to hear what you were about to ask because we already know, and the answer is 'no'." Warious said.

After that we had dinner and Warious fell asleep before I came in.

I slumped down onto the odd shaped bag/chair and finding it oddly comfortable, fell asleep.

O.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.

Hook: Review me please.